Made in Heaven
by sweeet-as-honey
Summary: It should have been easy. Ethan liked Ariel. Cal had already slept with her once, or so he believed, so he had no reason to want to see her again. But life is never that simple - especially when the girl is pregnant.
1. Chapter 1

_I started this a while ago, but it wasn't really working so I left it for a while, but for reasons which I'll go into later, I decided I needed to start posting it soon. I hope you enjoy it. I'll probably update on the same days as I Need You in future so there will be another update in two days' time, but it's my birthday so if ever I can break my own rules, it's now._

* * *

Ethan didn't usually notice if his patients were beautiful.

It just wasn't relevant. He was thinking of other things. He often didn't notice things like that in any case. It usually took him several weeks or even months to notice if a girl was attractive, and that was just one of the reasons why he always left it too late.

He couldn't see much of the patient because of the head restraints, but he could see a few wisps of blonde, curly hair. Her eyes were closed, though she was conscious, but she had long, dark lashes resting on her cheek and dark purple on her eyelids. This worried him momentarily, but although he wasn't an expert in eye make-up, he realised almost immediately that it wasn't bruising. She was wearing it because it looked beautiful. And it was working.

Ethan caught himself suddenly, appalled at what he was doing. A patient was on her way to Resus, and he'd been thinking about what she looked like. Even Cal usually waited at least until his patients were stable before he starting eyeing them up.

He tried to focus his attention on Dixie's recital of the girl's medical details, but at that point the girl's moans became sobs. Her hand seemed to be reaching out for something; anything. Ethan had seen it happen before and he usually left such hands alone unless he thought the flailing limb presented a danger either to the patient or to himself, but on this occasion, he caught it in his own and squeezed it reassuringly.

Almost immediately, he wished he hadn't done it. It was out of character for him and as Robyn was only a few metres away, ready to help Cal with the second casualty, there was every chance it would be all over the ED within a couple of hours that Ethan had held hands with a patient before he'd even been properly introduced to her. But after a moment or two, her sobs quietened and the hand in his relaxed slightly and Ethan knew that, unorthodox or not, he had done the right thing.

He just hoped he would be able to continue doing the right thing. He certainly hadn't been listening as closely as he should have done and he could only hope that Rita, who was working with him, had been paying better attention.

But as the patient was wheeled in Resus, Ethan discovered to his relief that he did seem to have absorbed the information Dixie had given him. Her name was Ariel Hennessey and she was twenty-three. She'd been involved in an accident whilst riding a bike. She was briefly KO-ed at the scene, but although she was conscious and responsive to voice and pain, she had been unable to answer any of their questions and the paramedics had discovered her identity from the contents of her purse. She'd sustained lacerations to her head and arm, had a suspected dislocated right shoulder and bruising to right leg.

Ethan had also taken in the most important piece of information, which would affect the treatment she was given: she was pregnant. A medical card in her bag revealed that she'd gone for her six-month check-up a few days before at St James's Hospital.

Ethan kept her condition in mind as he organised her treatment. As he gave instructions, he kept an eye on the patient, who was being comforted by Rita, but when she did start to show an interest in her surroundings, it was Ethan's eyes she sought.

"Where…?"

"You're in Holby City Hospital," said Ethan, speaking slowly and clearly. "My name's Dr Hardy: I'm one of the registrars. This is Rita."

Ariel's lips moved as she tried to say another word. Ethan bent closer to listen.

"Did you say baby?" he asked, and she nodded. "Early indications suggest that your baby is in good shape, though we won't know for certain until we've done a scan."

Her eyes filled with tears and she began to sob, almost silently.

"It's all right," said Ethan softly. He placed his hand on her arm. "You're safe. We're going to look after you."

* * *

All Cal knew about Ethan's patient was that she was female, but that was reason enough for him to be annoyed. They'd known there were two patients coming in and Cal had been poised to take the first that arrived, but then Connie had appeared and asked to speak to him for a moment. They were still discussing the very trivial matter of the necessity of making more detailed notes about patients when the first accident victim had arrived.

Connie had, of course, let Cal go in time for him to help the second patient, but although Cal didn't know much about Ethan's patient, he'd heard enough to be sure she was young and female.

Cal's patient, on the other hand, was a fifty-one-year-old overweight male.

Ethan had all the luck, Cal thought with more petulance than accuracy. He couldn't help wondering if Connie had known the girl was coming in first and had arranged matters accordingly, but Cal knew he would never dare ask. In any case, he had to think about his own patient, who was conscious and complaining loudly.

"She was riding on the wrong side of the road! That's the trouble with these cyclists. No respect for other road users. And this one doesn't even seem to know the rules! I slammed the breaks on, of course, but there was no way I could have avoided hitting her so she'd better not think of suing and you can tell her that from me."

"Let's just think about you for the moment, Mr Norris," said Cal as he, Iain and Robyn wheeled him into small Resus.

"Just don't let that girl leave till the police have spoken to her."

"It's unlikely that she'll be leaving very soon," said Cal. "So there's no need to worry about that for now."

Tim Norris tried to move his head, but the restraints made this impossible. "And get this thing off my head, would you?"

"We'll do that as soon as we've made sure there's no spinal injury," said Cal.

"There's nothing wrong with my-" began Tim, but then a light appeared in his eye. "Actually, now I think about it, my spine really hurts quite a lot. It wouldn't surprise me if it was broken. I did tell the paramedic here I didn't have any pain in my legs, but now I think about it, I can't feel my legs at all. I'm probably paralysed for life! I'll have to give up work. And it will be all that stupid girl's fault."


	2. Chapter 2

**ETWentHome** , thank you for your review - and the birthday wishes! I really appreciate it. I hope you continue to find the story interesting!

 **Tanith Panic** , thank you for your review - I'm happy you like it so far! I'm glad you like Ariel. It was difficult working out her personality - I didn't want her to be too like my other OCs. There could indeed be trouble ahead for the mercenary Tim.

 **Tato Potato** , Ethan does seem very caring on the show (except to Cal sometimes) so I'm pleased I've managed to bring that across. Thank you for your review!

 _Thank you for the follows and favourites too. And yes, I know Casualty has started... I've got it on pause. It's my reward for getting this chapter up! I'm going to miss Cal and Ethan though._

* * *

"It's all right now, sweetheart," said Rita. "I know it's been a shock for you, especially considering your condition, but you're safe now and we're going to help you. Dr Hardy is one of the best and he's really very kind."

"Well, I do my best," said Ethan awkwardly. "And, um, if you're worried about any… any physical examinations relating to the baby, I'm perfectly happy to step aside and let Rita take over if that's what you prefer – and if you do need a doctor to examine you, we have some lovely female doctors." He thought momentarily of Connie and Lily and wondered if he was stretching the truth just slightly, but he told himself they probably didn't frighten vulnerable young patients as much as they frightened young male registrars.

Ariel looked up at him and gave him the flicker of a smile. "It's okay. You're a doctor. I don't need to worry about that. I'm just worried about my babies."

"Babies, plural?" said Ethan.

Ariel nodded, her face softening. "I'm having twins. A boy and a girl."

Ethan smiled. "Congratulations. We'll be checking on them very soon, but we do also need to assess you, which means asking you a few questions. I'm afraid they're irrelevant questions which will probably seem like a complete waste of time, but it's something we have to do."

"It's okay," said Ariel softly. "My babies are the important thing – and if I'm not okay, that could affect them."

"Exactly," said Ethan, pleased she understood. She was clearly upset, but her reasoning appeared sound. He began to ask the questions.

To Ethan's surprise, Ariel was still completely blank on the name of the prime minister and was a bit hazy on today's date, but his impression was that she was in full possession of her faculties and was suffering more from ignorance than injury.

"I know it's stupid, but I just don't really get politics," she said with a self-deprecating smile. "I think he's got a very normal sort of name. And I never know what the date is. Isn't there something easier you could ask me instead?"

Ethan looked at her belongings, hoping for some clue of a question that he could ask her that was more within her field of knowledge. It surprised him that anyone could not know the name of the prime minister, but he was willing to do as she asked and try something else. He didn't want to cause any unnecessary fuss by putting Ariel's mental state down as more serious than it actually was.

He smiled when he saw the notebook she carried in her handbag. "Okay, Ariel. We'll forget about the prime minister. Can you tell me the full names of all five members of One Direction, please?"

"Dr Hardy!" said Ariel reproachfully. "There are four members now."

"Excellent: you passed that little test," said Ethan, after only a moment's pause. "Could you please tell me the name of all _four_ members of One Direction."

He saw Rita giving him an indulgent smile. She wasn't fooled for a moment. She probably thought Ethan had done well to know there were five members originally.

Ariel reeled off the names, including middle names, without hesitation. Ethan looked at Rita for confirmation: the names meant nothing to him, but the nurse was nodding. Ethan wasn't sure if she was a fan, but he'd seen her converse with patients on all manner of subjects to help take their minds off their illnesses and injuries.

"Well done," said Ethan, and smiled at Ariel. "That's excellent."

"And actually, Dr Hardy, maybe I can tell you today's date," said Ariel suddenly. "I don't know what day it is today, but I know how many days it is till I see One Direction in concert again. I've already seen them in Cardiff, but I'm going to London too. In thirteen days. And that's on the 24th of September, so I could probably count back to find out what the date is today, only I'm not very good at counting backwards or even forwards and… oh, Dr Hardy, it hurts…"

"Where does it hurt?" said Ethan.

"My head," gasped Ariel. "It must have been all those numbers… oh my God, oh, it hurts, please stop it from hurting!"

She began to cry. Ethan felt a jolt of sympathy that robbed him of speech for a moment or two. Then he gently touched her arm, aware that Rita was stroking her other arm.

"Ariel, we've been giving you paracetamol as morphine is not recommended during pregnancy unless the benefits outweigh the risks," said Ethan as gently as he could. "I can see you're experiencing a lot of pain, though, so morphine is something we can discuss if you'd like to. We can explain the risks to you and then it will be your decision."

"No." Ariel shook her head and winced in pain. "No, thank you, Dr Hardy. Stick to paracetamol, please. But if you could give me just a little bit more, I would really, really… oh my God."

Ethan quietly instructed Rita to increase the pain relief.

Ariel closed her eyes. Her cheeks were wet with tears. "Please tell me labour doesn't hurt this much. Even if it's not actually true, could you please tell me that?"

"With labour, there are other methods of dealing with the pain, which we wouldn't consider in this case, but they will almost certainly be available to you once it's time for the baby to arrive," said Ethan. He wasn't willing to lie, even to comfort his patient. "So you don't need to worry about that."

"It hurts, doesn't it?" said Ariel.

"I've never personally experienced it," said Ethan.

Ariel gave a sob. "I didn't think you had. I know I've hit my head, but I have noticed you're not a woman."

"Oh. Good," said Ethan. "That's a positive sign. Some head injuries can affect eyesight."

"I can tell you're a man from the way you faff about," Ariel gasped through the pain.

Rita burst into giggles, then tried to pretend she'd been coughing.

"Oh, I'm sorry!" said Ariel. "I didn't mean to be rude. It's just you're being so nice to me and I forgot you were a doctor. It was just like talking to a friend."

Ethan ignored Rita and smiled at Ariel. "It's all right, Ariel. You weren't rude in the slightest and you're actually not the first person to mention my name in connection with the phrase 'faffing about'. Your observation skills are clearly unimpaired, which is excellent."

Ariel closed her eyes. Ethan knew she was dealing with the pain and asked no more questions, though he kept his hand on her arm. Finally, he allowed himself to admit what had been hovering at the edge of his consciousness for a while: she really was beautiful.

She only became more beautiful as the signs of pain faded from her face. He only wished he could help to take away the emotional pain as well. There were tearstains on her cheeks and her eyes were red and swollen, though that did nothing to mar her beauty. Her eyes were large and a brighter green than Ethan had ever noticed in a person, though as a rule he did tend not to notice eye colour unless he was examining the eyes. Her nose was also slightly red, but Ethan couldn't help thinking it was rather pretty. Small, like his own, but a more attractive shape.

Ethan stopped staring and gave himself a talking-to. This was the kind of behaviour he expected from Cal, not from himself!

And he had to stop. Now.

"Ariel, are you okay?" Rita said suddenly, and Ethan's eyes snapped back to the patient. She was gasping for breath.

* * *

Cal did his best to make his smile professional rather than triumphant. "No, the scans look clear. There's been no damage to your spine. You've actually been extremely lucky, Mr Norris – other than bruising, you seem to have suffered no injuries at all."

As he'd expected, Tim Norris looked far from pleased. "What, none at all? You haven't examined my whole body, so how can you know?"

"I understand the paramedics made a survey at the scene and no signs of injury were found," said Cal. "And as the only pain you've reported was in your back, it looks as though you're fine, though we will of course keep you in a bit longer for observation. Some injuries can take a while to make themselves felt." He knew he was inviting Tim to invent some new injuries on the spot, but Cal had already resolved to mention this very strong possibility in his notes.

"You know, now I come to think of it, my leg hurts," said Tim, a cunning look in his eye. "Leg injuries can be very serious, can't they, doctor? I can't do my job without my legs, you know."

"I'm glad to hear you've regained the feeling in your legs," said Cal. "That must be a great relief to you after having no feeling in them at all. If you'd like to remove your trousers, I'll examine your leg for you and send you for another scan if I feel it's necessary."

A wary look came into Tim's eyes. "Remove my trousers?"

"Yes, Mr Norris. Remove your trousers," said Cal. "I hope there's not a problem with that."

"I could sue you for sexual harassment, you know," said Tim.

Cal looked at him in amazement. "What makes you think my interest in you is sexual?"

"I saw you checking out your reflection in the door on the way back from the scan," said Tim. "You were fussing with your hair when I was having my scan too. You needn't think I didn't see you because I did."

"Look, just because…" Cal stopped and a smile crossed his face. There was nothing wrong with being gay, of course, but there was also nothing wrong with making mercenary old homophobes feel uncomfortable. "Just because a doctor is gay and wishes to examine your legs, it doesn't mean he has any interest in you. If you have a genuine leg injury, you need it to be treated."

"I'd like to request a _normal_ doctor," said Tim.

"I'd like to request a normal patient, but I don't get to choose either," said Cal. "Anyone with a genuine injury would be far more worried about that then the fact that you might be my type – which I can assure you you're not. I prefer them younger, slimmer and much hotter than you." He looked challengingly at Tim. "So what's it to be, Mr Norris? Would you like me to examine your leg injury? Or shall I just discharge you?"


	3. Chapter 3

**beckyboogle** , thank you for your review. I'm very pleased you're enjoying it as I'm not sure about this story at all. Ethan definitely deserves someone who is beautiful and kind as he is both those things. Though he might not like being called beautiful!

 **Tato Potato** , thank you for your review. I find Ethan's awkwardness very loveable and can't resist including it in my stories so it's good to know other people like it too. I'm enjoying writing Cal getting the better of someone instead of making an idiot of himself!

* * *

As Ethan watched, some of the strain faded from Ariel's bright green eyes and as her face relaxed, a small amount of colour began to return to it.

"Is that better?" he asked gently. "I know panic attacks can be absolutely terrifying and very painful and I'm sorry I couldn't do more to help."

"Yes, I feel better," said Ariel. "And you helped a lot. Thank you, Dr Hardy. Thank you, Rita." Her voice was fainter than before, but she was almost smiling at him as she continued. "I do feel like someone has taken a poker to my head, but it was more like a tree trunk before. So it could be worse."

Ethan smiled. "That sounds like a significant improvement to me, though I do hope by the time you leave, you'll feel as though you've been hit on the head by a matchstick at most." He was, of course, concerned about her headache, but they would know more when she went for her scan. In the meantime, the last thing he wanted was to cause Ariel any more worry.

Ariel looked up at him. Her eyes met his and she stared at him for a moment. "You probably think I'm awful, Dr Hardy."

"Not in the least," Ethan told her truthfully. "I think you're being remarkably brave."

"But I'm making such a fuss," said Ariel. "I'm going to have two babies in three months' time and I'm behaving like a baby myself."

"Of course you're not," said Ethan. "You're behaving like a patient who has just been in an accident. Though, of course, not every accident victim behaves in the same way. A lot are upset and worried. Some are angry about the accident and often take it out on us. Some are all caught up in the excitement and adrenaline and haven't really taken it in yet. Some are…" He stopped as he caught Rita's eye. "I'm so sorry. I'm rambling. All I meant to say that is your reaction is both completely understandable and one of the easier reactions to deal with so you have absolutely no reason to worry."

Ariel smiled. "Thank you, Dr Hardy. That's a relief. And it was interesting hearing how different people react. That's not something I've ever thought about before."

Ethan thought she was probably just being polite, but he appreciated her words all the same. She was kind and sweet and her babies were very lucky. "Now, I need to ask you one more question as part of my assessment – and I'm hoping that you'll be able to go for your scan after that. What's the last thing you remember before being admitted to hospital?"

Ariel pursed up her lips in thought. They looked very full and pink, so Ethan decided not to look at them.

"Anything you can remember," he prompted. "Don't worry if you think it might not be the last thing. Sometimes memories can get a bit mixed up in your mind, but it does help us to know to what extent your memory is affected. Also, it's possible the police will want to speak to you later, so speaking to me about it might help you to get things clear in your mind."

"But it is all right if you don't feel ready to talk about it," said Rita quickly.

Ethan nodded. "Yes, of course it's all right."

"I was on my bike, wasn't I?" said Ariel, a bit uncertainly.

"Yes, that's correct," said Ethan. He thought that riding a bike wasn't the most sensible idea when you were pregnant, but he wasn't there to judge.

Ariel gave him a sad look. "I know what you're thinking, Dr Hardy. I might not be clever enough to be a doctor - or anything else much really - but I can tell what you're thinking and you're right."

Immediately, Ethan started thinking all kinds of things he definitely didn't want Ariel to know about, like the fact she was beautiful and he was very concerned about her headache and his opinion of One Direction was that they weren't terribly good. "What am I thinking?" he asked nervously.

"You're thinking that no pregnant woman in her right mind would go around on a bike," said Ariel. "And you're right. My balance is just crazy and I can't get my knees up properly."

Ethan hesitated. "That does seem to suggest it's not the best time to be riding a bike, but I'm sure you had a reason."

"And even if you don't, we're not here to judge you," added Rita.

Ariel sighed. "I do have a reason, but I'm afraid it's not a very good one. I was tired. I'd just been to the shops, but I'd forgotten to get any milk and I couldn't face walking back. I don't have a car and the price of taxis is just ridiculous. The last time I got in a taxi and was given the price, I laughed because I thought he was joking. But he wasn't. I only just had enough money."

Ethan found himself wondering if there were taxi drivers who took advantage of defenceless young woman. The thought of it made him angry, but he tried not to show it.

"We'll give you the number of the taxi service we use before you go," said Rita. "They're very reliable and cheaper than most."

Ethan nodded at Rita, grateful she'd thought of it. "Don't worry, Ariel. I quite understand why you wanted to ride instead of walk. I'm sure I'd do exactly the same in your position." He saw Rita hiding a smile and felt embarrassed. "Um, not that I'm ever likely to be expecting a baby."

"Can you remember anything else?" asked Rita gently.

Ariel's eyelids fluttered closed. It was probably an aid to thought, but Ethan checked the monitor anyway and was relieved to see there was no change.

"There was a car," said Ariel. "It was coming. Coming towards me. I think it was on the wrong side of the road, but maybe I was on the wrong side? I don't know. I can't think."

"It's all right," said Ethan. "Take your time – and if you can't remember, it doesn't matter." It did matter in the context that a loss of memory could mean a more serious injury, but he didn't want Ariel to worry as that wouldn't help her chances of remembering.

"Oh, yes, I remember now. I was definitely on the right side of the road."

Ethan frowned. "Do you mean the right side as in the correct side or the opposite to left side?"

"Oh. I don't know what I meant now you put it like that," said Ariel. "I'm sorry, Dr Hardy. Let me think."

Ethan didn't want to push her, but he had to admit that what she'd said worried him. "Can you tell me if you were on the left-hand side of the road?"

"Right!" said Ariel.

Ethan experienced a sinking feeling. "The right-hand side of the road." In the face of oncoming traffic.

"No, I mean 'right' as in 'right, I understand you'," said Ariel. "I was on the left-hand side. And so was the car, but I suppose it was the right side for him?"

"If it was coming towards you, then… yes, it would have been," said Ethan. He was beginning to get a bit confused now too.

"It was coming towards me," said Ariel. She began to tremble. "So slowly. I should have got out of the way. I couldn't move." Her voice rose. "Why couldn't I move? I had time to move, so why didn't I?"

Ethan knew he was getting onto dangerous ground. He didn't know what had happened and there was a chance that anything he said would be contradicted later. But it was his job to calm the patient. "I know it makes little sense scientifically, but when an accident happens, time sometimes does appear to slow down," he said. "It's also very natural to freeze in a moment of fear. Whatever happened, your reaction was understandable. Now we've ascertained what happened, we only need to think about the future."

Ariel began to sob.

"Oh, no… oh, please don't cry," said Ethan. "I'm sorry for making you think about what happened. You don't have to think about it anymore. You're safe now."

Ariel continued to cry, the tears rolling down her face.

Ethan stared at her in concern and misery. Rita was more practical: she hugged Ariel and gave her a tissue.

"Is there anyone you'd like us to call for you?" said Ethan, when Ariel had stopped crying.

Ariel shook her head and winced as the movement hurt her head.

"I'm sorry: I should have warned you to try to keep your head still," said Ethan. Actually, he had warned her, but it was understandable that she'd forgotten. "No-one at all?"

"How about a friend or family member?" said Rita.

"There's no-one," said Ariel. She smiled tiredly. "You are easy to mind-read, you know, Dr Hardy. You're wondering about the baby's father, aren't you?"

"It did cross my mind," admitted Ethan.


	4. Chapter 4

**ETWentHome** , thank you for your review - I'm glad you're enjoying the story. It's possible that the things you mention have some significance... you'll have to wait and see!

 **beckyboogle** , thank you for your review - you're always so kind! Well, you don't have to wait any longer for the next chapter. I just hope it doesn't disappoint you.

 **Tanith Panic** , thank you for both your reviews. I don't like Tim either! But it's possible we haven't seen the last of him. I'm glad you like Ethan's gentleness and understanding - I love writing that side of his character.

* * *

Cal was often glad to say goodbye to his patients. Some were simple time-wasters and others were simply annoying. Tim Norris had proved to be both. Not to mention a nasty, prejudiced bit of work as well. Cal hoped he'd never have anything to do with him ever again. He hoped even more fervently that no genuinely gay doctor would ever have to treat him. Cal often regretted the fact that you couldn't go around telling patients what you thought of him - though he had been known to do it on occasion.

So he was very relieved when Tim finally left with a prescription for painkillers and instructions to take it easy for a couple of days. Cal was fairly confident that this was the right advice. He'd taken every precaution, as well as looking into a few possibilities he'd known were unlikely, if not impossible.

There was just one problem. Unfortunately, the right advice had eluded Cal far too many times in the last month and he considered himself to be in a rather precarious position at the moment. On three occasions in the last couple of weeks, he'd discharged patients, only for them to return to the ED a few hours later in a much more serious condition. Each of the situations had (not unreasonably) come to the attention of Connie, and she'd made it clear that there would be repercussions if Cal made the same mistake again.

"Nothing to do, Dr Knight?"

Cal swung round, more than a little disconcerted to see the object of his thoughts standing before him. "I've just discharged my patient, Mrs Beauchamp, and I was just on my way to the waiting room for the next one," he said virtuously.

Connie, to his amazement, actually looked impressed. "I can only admire your memory, Dr Knight."

"My memory?" said Cal blankly.

"Unless, of course, it's your psychic abilities I should be admiring," said Connie. "But when I'm on my way to see a patient, I usually take their file with me. I consider my memory to be more than usually good, as I'm sure you've had the opportunity to observe, Dr Knight, but I don't like to take any chances."

"It's a new patient," said Cal quickly. "A visitor to the area. So she doesn't have a file."

"Of course, that is sometimes the case," said Connie. "So, tell me about this patient, Dr Knight. What's her name?"

"Oh… um…" If there was one thing Cal ought to be able to think of, it was women's names. He'd known enough of them. "Rihanna… um… Taylor."

"How very exotic," said Connie. "What's wrong with her?"

And if there was another thing Cal ought to be able to remember, it was types of injuries. "She has a… puncture wound to her left…" He looked at a passing nurse for inspiration. "…buttock."

"That sounds very painful," said Connie. "I 'd like to meet her. I'll come with you and you can introduce me."

Cal contemplated going to the waiting room and asking for Rihanna Taylor. It wasn't unknown, after all, for patients to change their mind and leave the hospital.

But Cal very much doubted there was a patient with that name entered onto the system and even if there was, the chances of her having booked in as a patient today were very low.

"I… can't?" he said, hanging his head and shuffling his feet as though he were twenty years younger than he was.

"Oh, really? Care to tell me why?" said Connie.

"Because there's no patient," mumbled Cal. "I've just sent a patient home and I was wondering if I'd done the right thing so I was… well, I wasn't doing anything really."

Connie sighed. "Judging from your recent performances, Dr Knight, the chances are you _haven't_ done the right thing. I'd like to see you in my office at the end of your shift."

"Yes, Mrs Beauchamp," said Cal, and wondered if he'd come out of it alive.

"But as I can hardly trust you on your own, I think it's better if you work with another doctor for the rest of the day," said Connie.

Cal sighed. He could guess who she was thinking of. Dr Ethan Perfect Hardy.

Not that Lily or Dylan would be any easier, but at least he'd get rid of them once his shift ended. There was no escape from Ethan.

Connie smiled. It reminded Cal of a shark. An extremely beautiful shark. "Dr Knight, I'd like you to work with me."

* * *

The corner of Ariel's mouth lifted as though she was trying to smile. She didn't really manage it. "The baby's father is… let's just say he's not in the picture."

"I'm sorry to hear that," said Ethan. It was one of his standard responses when he didn't know what to say, but he really meant it this time. It bothered him to think of Ariel managing on her own with no support, especially when there were two babies to consider. "Does the father know you're pregnant?"

"No," said Ariel. "I… I don't have his contact details. I gave him my number and he said he'd call, but he never did. I'm not even sure if he mentioned his surname. I'm sure I'd recognise him if I saw him again, but what are the chances of that?"

"It's all right," said Ethan, even though it wasn't all right at all from her point of view. "It's not your fault you couldn't tell him – and it doesn't sound like he's the sort of person who deserves to know."

Sadness came into Ariel's eyes. "You probably think I'm a dirty slut."

"It never crossed my mind to think that," said Ethan. "It's not my place to make judgements on any decisions you might have made. Even if it was, I don't think you did anything wrong. All you did was something a lot of people do every day. Well, no: perhaps not every day. But often."

"I don't do it every day," said Ariel as her eyes welled with tears. "I'd never slept with a man on the first date before… not that it was really a date. I thought he meant what he told me. He didn't say he'd fallen in love at first sight or anything like that. I wouldn't have fallen for that for a second. But he asked lots of questions and seemed really interested in the answers. He told me I was sweet. He said he really liked me. But he did lie when he said he'd call me, so the rest of it was probably all lies too."

"A lot of people make that mistake," said Ethan. "The trouble is you can't go around disbelieving everything people tell you and it's difficult to know who you shouldn't believe." He looked at her and wondered how she was going to manage with two babies and no support. There would be social services, of course, but that wouldn't be the same.

Ariel smiled at him gratefully. "I'm so glad you understand. Have you been caught that way yourself?" Then she looked horrified. "Oh, I'm so sorry. That was none of my business. You're just so easy to talk to. I forgot you were a doctor. It's like talking to a friend."

"Thank you. Not many people say I'm easy to talk to." Ethan smiled back. "Let's just say I have known women who have lied to me and pretended an interest I doubt they really felt. I imagine it happens to everyone in some form, at some time." It had even happened to Cal, and Ethan would have thought he knew everything there was to know about pretending an interest you didn't feel.

A movement caught his eye and he saw another trolley being wheeled into Resus with Cal and Connie in attendance. He quickly checked there was a free bay: if not, Ariel would be the patient to move, but Bay 2 was available.

Ethan turned back to his patient, almost eager to continue the conversation, but his smile faded when he saw she'd put her hands over her face. "Are you all right? Is the pain worse?"

"No, I'm fine," whispered Ariel. "I just…" She kept her hands over her face.

"What?" said Ethan.

Ariel kept whispering. "Could you not speak so loudly, Dr Hardy, please! I don't know what to do. I probably shouldn't tell you. It would be so awkward. But if I don't tell you now, it might come out later and then if you're not around and I need another doctor, I'll be in a complete mess…"

Ethan held her arm gently. He spoke in a whisper. "Please tell me what's wrong. I'll be happy to help all I can."

"I just saw him," said Ariel. "Cal."


	5. Chapter 5

_I'd just like to say that this story was inspired by Cal's general behaviour and the laws of probability, rather than anything else. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. If you don't, you soon will! (I wanted to say this at the start of the story, but I thought it would give too much away.)_

 **Tato Potato** , thank you for the review. I thought it was obvious who the father was, but it sounds like it came as a little bit of a surprise, and that makes me really happy! I hope you enjoy the next chapter.

 **ETWentHome** , yes, you're right and it does make things awkward! I hope it wasn't too glaringly obvious, though I actually like the fact that some people guessed. You'll find out Ethan's reaction very soon. Thank you for your review!

 **beckyboogle** , I'm so happy you didn't see it coming! I thought everyone would. I'm glad I managed to surprise someone. Thank you for your review - I hope you won't be speechless for long!

 **Tanith Panic** , I don't know where the shark idea came from, but Connie is terrifying and has an impressive set of teeth! I'm glad I managed to surprise you. Thank you for your review!

* * *

It wasn't the first time this had happened. When you had as many girlfriends as Cal, the chances were that his exes would arrive in the hospital on a fairly regular basis.

But this, Ethan knew, was different.

"You mean Cal is the-" he said.

"Sh!" hissed Ariel sharply. "He mustn't know I'm here."

Ethan shook his head. "But he can help you. It's his responsibility to help you." Ethan just wished he could be sure Cal would help. He was well-meaning, but he'd never committed to anything except medical school (and even that had taken him more than one attempt) and he could barely even look after himself at times, although perhaps it was more that he didn't see the point when Ethan was there to do it for him.

"It's my decision, Dr Hardy," said Ariel. Her voice was soft but very determined. "I don't want him to know."

And Ethan realised, with a sinking feeling, that there was nothing he could do.

* * *

Ethan was being off with him again.

This came as no surprise to Cal. Ethan was off with him quite a lot and Cal quite often never found out why.

The rest of the time, he was told the problem at great length on multiple occasions.

Either way, it was annoying.

And here he was again, thought Cal, as his brother came back again. Cal felt a little bit better when he recognised the look on Ethan's face as the one that meant he'd forgotten something and he was annoyed with himself, but the relief soon disappeared when he got another icy blast from his brother's usually-warm brown eyes.

He watched Ethan go and tried to work out what he could have done. He had left his washing on the floor in front of the washing machine instead of putting it inside – for some reason, this annoyed Ethan more than when Cal left it in his room – but Ethan wouldn't know about that yet.

"Problem, Dr Knight?" enquired Connie.

"No, it's Ethan who's got the problem," said Cal crossly.

"Poor Ethan. He's had such a challenging life," said Connie.

Cal decided he wasn't quite brave enough to ask what she meant, but one thing was clear in his mind.

This was not going to be a good day.

* * *

Ethan wheeled Ariel carefully towards her room. The scan had revealed the babies were fine; her shoulder was back in its correct position; the laceration on her arm had been cleaned and dressed; and her headache was revealed not to be serious and was quite possibly no more than a reaction to her stressful situation. She was to remain in the hospital for observation, which Ethan felt was a sensible precaution, but he knew that all she wanted was to go home – and get away from Cal.

If there had been anyone at home to look after her, he might even have agreed to let her go, but she lived alone and had no close friends in the area. This was a bit of a surprise as her current condition suggested she'd been in Holby for at least six months, but it wasn't his place to pry.

One thing he knew for a fact was that she was no longer just another patient. Her babies were technically his nephews, nieces or both, but he was in two minds about whether to reveal the relationship or not. If she knew that the doctor who was treating her was Cal's brother, that might pave the way for some sort of reconciliation between the twins' parents. At the very least, Cal could be persuaded to pay child support (though considering his money difficulties, he'd probably have to borrow the money from Ethan).

But telling her he was Cal's brother might have completely the opposite effect and cause her to turn away from Ethan when he seemed like the one person she was able to trust.

He looked down at her. He couldn't see very much other than the top of her head and her knees, but her face was imprinted on his mind. He still thought she was beautiful and couldn't blame Cal for thinking it too, but she was also very sweet and really not the one-night stand type at all, and an expert like Cal ought to have been able to realise that before he broke her heart.

He heard a tiny of fear from Ariel and belatedly realised Cal was coming down the corridor towards him. He felt another surge of anger towards his brother, but was quick to turn Ariel's wheelchair aside, pushing her into the nearest cubicle.

"Sorry, Dylan," he mumbled on discovering the cubicle was already occupied. "I do apologise for my, um, intrusion," he added for the patient's benefit.

"Just get out," said Dylan.

Ethan decided that backing out wouldn't be safe as Cal wouldn't be past the cubicle yet, so instead, he tried to turn the wheelchair around, which really wasn't advisable in such a tiny space, but if Ariel didn't want Cal to see her, he would have to do whatever it took to ensure it didn't happen.

"That's my toe!" shouted Dylan.

"I'm sorry, Dylan," said Ethan, and backed up a little bit. "Would you like me to examine it for you?"

"I'd like you to get out and let me treat my patient," said Dylan loudly.

"Right. Yes. Of course. Sorry," said Ethan. He started to turn the wheelchair again, being a lot more careful this time.

"Just take it out backwards!" shouted Dylan, and Ethan felt a stab of guilt, knowing he was stressing Dylan out. He didn't want to upset him. He knew things were difficult for Dylan at the moment. But he also had to consider Ariel.

Ethan hesitated and decided there was a chance Cal had passed them by now. "I'm sorry, Dylan. You're right. I'll go out backwards."

He backed out of the cubicle, only to bump into someone.

"I _thought_ it was you," said Cal. "I wonder why it's always you who blunders into the wrong cubicle when a woman is getting undressed. If it was me, you could understand it. But you…"

Ethan kept the wheelchair turned away from Cal and glared at him over his shoulder. "The patient was a man and he wasn't undressed. Now leave me alone, please, Caleb."

"But it's the best fun I've had all day!" said Cal.

Ethan wondered if he could risk turning the wheelchair and hurrying away. He glanced down at Ariel to see she was hunched down in her wheelchair as much as her bump allowed, her hands over her face. He turned back to Cal. "Please leave, Caleb. My patient has a phobia of tall, muscular men."

"Good thing _you're_ her doctor then," said Cal, and tried to peer around Ethan to look at Ariel.

"Just go away!" hissed Ethan.

Cal looked as though going away was the last thing on his mind, but at that moment came the sound of a pair of heels tapping along the corridor. It could have been Zoe or Lily, but Ethan saw Cal tense with fear even before he looked.

"Dr Knight. There you are," said Connie. "Come with me, please. Dr Hardy, is there a reason why you're creating an obstruction in the corridor? Either go into the cubicle or come out, please."

Ethan braced himself for a 'coming out' joke, but Cal said absolutely nothing. Ethan angled his body to ensure that Cal wouldn't see Ariel and awkwardly pushed the wheelchair along the corridor.

"Dr Hardy, is there a problem?" said Connie.

Ethan froze. He kept the wheelchair turned away from Cal and turned round slowly. "A problem?"

"A problem with the wheelchair," explained Connie. "You're pushing it in a rather odd fashion."

"I… I think perhaps there is a problem, Mrs Beauchamp," said Ethan, and moved to a more conventional position, pushing the wheelchair gently forwards. "No: it's all right now. I'm sorry."

He braced himself for Connie's reaction, but not for the first time, she surprised him.

"We really need to send some of our wheelchairs for maintenance. You're not the only person to have trouble. If you have any more problems, let one of the porters know and use a different wheelchair."

"Yes. Thank you, Mrs Beauchamp," said Ethan gratefully.

Connie raised an eyebrow. "It was only a recommendation, Dr Hardy. There's no need to go over the top."

She turned away and left, Cal following behind her (a position he probably didn't mind being in) and Ethan quickly wheeled Ariel to her room. "Here we are. I'm so sorry about that. He shouldn't bother you anymore."

He looked down at Ariel and gave what he hoped was a reassuring smile, only to stop smiling when he saw the tears spilling down her cheeks.

"Ariel, I'm sorry." He bent down in front of the wheelchair. He'd been planning on holding one of her hands, but then he realised one was in a sling and the other was being used to wipe her eyes. He hesitated, hoping he wasn't about to do something horribly inappropriate, and placed his hand tentatively on her knee. "I'm afraid I'm not very good at dealing with that sort of thing. But it will be easier now. Once you're in bed, you can put the bedclothes over your face if anyone comes in, but there's absolutely no reason for Cal to come in here and he won't be able to cause any trouble if he's working with Mrs Beauchamp. He's absolutely terrified of her. We all are."

"No, you dealt with it really well," sniffed Ariel. "Thank you, Dr Hardy. It's just… seeing him again… hearing his voice again…"

"I know," said Ethan gently. "It must have been a shock. Come on: I'll help you into bed. I'm sure you'll feel better once you're in bed." He realised how stupid that sounded. "Well, no. I'm sorry. You probably won't feel that much better, but perhaps you'll be a little bit more… comfortable?"

Ariel nodded. Ethan helped her to her feet and supported her as she climbed into bed, careful not to put any pressure on her shoulder or arm.

"How's that?" he said as he adjusted the pillows for her.

"That's great… thank you."

"You're welcome." Ethan patted her arm. "I really am very sorry about everything that's happened."

Ariel looked up at him. "None of this is your fault, Dr Hardy. It's not your fault Cal works here."

Ethan thought uncomfortably that in a way, it probably was. "Why don't you call me Ethan?" he said. "If you want to, I mean. Dr Hardy sounds so formal."

Especially coming from his niece and nephew's mother.


	6. Chapter 6

**beckyboogle** , thank you for your review - you're very kind! I agree that Cal needs to know, but Ethan has to respect his patient's wishes so he's in a horrible situation.

 **Tato Potato** , thank you for your review. I'm glad you like caring Ethan - I really love writing about him! Cal will find out eventually, but I haven't decided when or how yet. I have a lot still to work out!

 **ETWentHome** , Ethan is in a horrible situation. He's managing brilliantly at the moment because he's concentrating on his patient and the full impact hasn't hit him - but believe me, it will! Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , I had to put Dylan in the story somewhere! I'm not sure how well this would work as a rom-com as there will be a lot of serious moments too, but thank you for the compliment - and for the review.

* * *

Ariel managed a small smile. "Okay. Ethan. I like that name."

"I like your name too," said Ethan. "Do your parents like Shakespeare?"

Pain filled Ariel's eyes for a moment. "No. I didn't even know it was Shakespeare till Cal told me. He's very well-read, isn't he?"

"I… wasn't aware of it," said Ethan truthfully, unable to remember the last time he'd seen Cal reading a book. "But he's not really a friend of mine." He felt disloyal saying it, but he didn't see what choice he had. He had to be loyal to Ariel now. Ethan's personal discomfort didn't matter.

He was relieved when Ariel returned to the original subject. "My parents called me Ariel because their first date together was to see _The Little Mermaid_. It took me years to forgive them for that. There were lots of washing powder jokes at school."

"It could have been worse," offered Ethan. "Your parents could have gone to see _Pocahontas_."

Ariel gave a small smile. "Yes. That would have been much worse." She looked at him curiously. "I wouldn't have put you down as a Disney fan."

"My ex-girlfriend liked Disney films," said Ethan. "They're not really my sort of film, but I did enjoy them." He changed the subject quickly. "Are you a Disney fan?"

"With a name like Ariel?" Ariel shook her head. "I hate Disney. The annoying thing is, so did my parents until that date. My dad wanted to impress my mum by choosing a girly, romantic film. She wasn't impressed. But they got talking afterwards and I suppose the film always had a special place in their hearts after that. My sister is called Aurora after Sleeping Beauty."

Ethan hesitated. "I could call your parents or your sister if you wanted me to."

"You couldn't," said Ariel with a sad smile. "Please don't feel bad, Ethan, but my parents died six years ago and my sister lives in New Zealand. We don't have much contact."

"Oh. I'm so sorry," said Ethan, mentally cringing. He couldn't have known, but he still felt terrible. "I'm sorry about your parents, Ariel."

Ariel looked at him for a moment. Her eyes were gentle. "That's what everyone says. But you actually mean it, Ethan, don't you?"

Ethan nodded. He couldn't bear the thought that she'd suffered so much – and that his brother had made it worse.

"I'm glad you're my doctor," said Ariel. She looked down at her hands. "You've been so kind to me."

Ethan couldn't tell her that he felt as though he ought to do something to make up for Cal.

"I don't suppose you'd mind telling me something?" said Ariel.

"I'm sure I won't mind at all as long as I know the answer."

"It might be awkward," said Ariel. "I don't want to upset your working relationship."

Ethan tried to speak reassuringly. "Please don't worry. Anything you say to me is confidential and the fact I'm acquainted with Cal is irrelevant."

Ariel looked at him uncertainly, but then she came to a decision. "I was just wondering his last name was." She gave a shaky laugh. "I was thinking I might need it for the birth certificates and if they ask me and I don't know, I'm going to feel so embarrassed."

"It's Knight," said Ethan, and he'd never felt so glad that Cal had changed his name.

Comprehension showed in Ariel's eyes. "That must be why he kept telling me he was my knight in shining armour. He seemed to think he was saying something really clever, but I didn't like to say I didn't understand. He seemed so sweet." Her eyes were bright with tears.

Ethan took her hand in his and squeezed it. He didn't know what to say.

"But I'm sure you've got better things to do than talking to me," said Ariel.

"I don't know about better," said Ethan. "I'm enjoying our conversation. I mean, I'm enjoying the parts that aren't sad. Not that I'm not happy for you to tell me sad things. I'm… honoured you trust me. I probably should go quite soon, but I'll keep checking on you between patients." That would usually have been Rita's job, but under the circumstances, Ethan had decided the job should be his and despite her initial objections, Rita had eventually, if reluctantly, agreed. "Can I get you anything? A magazine?"

"Thank you, Ethan. A magazine would be lovely." Ariel looked at him for a moment. "And I don't suppose hospital food stretches to clotted cream?"

Ethan stared at her for a moment, but then he smiled. "Is that your craving?"

Ariel nodded. "I try not to have too much of it. But I usually let myself have some after a bad day and I think today qualifies."

"I'll see what I can do," said Ethan. "I'm afraid I can't give you anything to eat while you're under observation, but considering you're eating for, er, three, it would be most remiss of me to discharge you on an empty stomach."

* * *

Cal was quite surprised when Connie asked him to go and see one of their patients on his own. She hadn't let him out of her sight since they'd been working together, but she'd come to the conclusion even Cal couldn't mess up telling a patient that there was a slight delay with the scans but it shouldn't be more than twenty minutes.

Cal went to the patient's room, knocked lightly on the door and pushed it open. "Hi, Paul. Just letting you know that you-"

He stopped. The patient in the bed was decidedly not a forty-year-old male.

"Oh, sorry," said Cal to the attractive twentysomething blonde, who was staring at him in alarm. "Wrong room."

He backed out quickly, located the correct room and delivered the message. Once that was done, he was supposed to return to Connie, but instead he stood in the corridor, frowning across at the door of the room he'd entered accidentally.

He went over to the door, tapped on it again and opened it to find the girl half-hidden under the covers. "I'm sorry to bother you, but I was just wondering: have we met before?"

"Yes, we have," said the girl. "You just burst into my room by mistake about three minutes ago."

Cal squirmed at the memory. "No, I mean before that."

"I'm sure you'd remember if you had," said the girl softly.

"Well, I think I do remember," said Cal. There had been so many girls, so he couldn't be sure, but there was definitely something familiar about her. "What's your name?"

Her voice rose. "If you did remember me, you'd remember me well enough to know my name! Now please go. I'm trying to rest."

Cal decided to do as he was told. Connie would be wondering where he was and maybe he had made a mistake.

He was making a lot of them at the moment.

* * *

Ethan stood looking at the display of magazines and tried not to think that this was where he'd been standing when he'd first met Honey – though she'd hardly registered at the time. He'd been busy thinking about the funeral; about Jeff… and thinking that he actually felt quite unwell and that he shouldn't really be out of bed.

He looked in the music section and picked up a couple of magazines with One Direction on the cover. He saw a copy of _Disney Princess_ magazine and smiled, but he didn't pick it up. Perhaps one day he would be able to tease his… his nephew and niece's mother by buying her something like that, but he'd only just met her and had no way of knowing if she and her children would play any part in his future. If she remained adamant in her refusal to tell Cal about his parting gift, perhaps she would never know why he saw her as more than a patient.

But the thought of letting her go back to what seemed like a lonely life made his heart ache: more emotion to pile on top of the anger and helplessness he felt whenever he thought of Cal.

Ethan had a quick look in the confectionary section for clotted cream, but as he expected, there wasn't any. He'd have to go to the shops later. He paid for the magazines and began the walk back to Ariel's room. He found he was smiling at the thought of seeing her and told himself to stop, but it didn't work. He opened the door, still smiling as he held the magazines aloft.

But his smile froze and faded when he realised Ariel was crying.

"Ariel, what is it?" said Ethan as he hurried to her side. "Are you in pain?"

"Cal was here," wept Ariel.

Ethan sat on the edge of the bed and held her hand. "I'm sorry," he said uselessly. "He shouldn't have come in here. He had no right to. Would you like to tell me what happened?"

"He came into my room by accident," sniffed Ariel. "Then he came back a few minutes later and asked if we'd met before. He thought he recognised me, but he wasn't sure. I knew he probably wouldn't be interested anymore, but I thought he'd at least remember me. I really must have meant nothing to him."

Ethan nearly said Cal had a lot of girlfriends, but he realised in time that this wouldn't help. "Cal has a very bad memory," he said instead. "Especially when he's been drinking." He stopped as he realised this probably wasn't helping either, but Ariel's face had lit up.

"Do you think that's what happened, Ethan? Do you think he meant to call me like he promised, but he woke up the next day and couldn't remember anything about me at all?"

Ethan was torn. He wanted to comfort her, but he knew he mustn't raise her hopes. Even if Cal had meant to call, that wouldn't have guaranteed any kind of relationship. "I'm sorry, Ariel. I have no way of knowing what goes on in Cal's mind." He squeezed her hand to soften his words. "I'm sorry."

He felt like crying too as the hope faded from her face. Her bright eyes lost their animation. Slowly, they filled with big tears which swelled until her eyes could no longer hold them, spilling over and falling down her cheek, leaving a wet, shiny trail of sadness and heartbreak.

Ethan grabbed a tissue and gently dabbed at her tears, but more were flooding her eyes and her breath was hitching. For a moment, he thought she would win her battle for control, but then the sobs burst out of her: harsh, ugly sounds that broke Ethan's heart even more.

Not knowing what else to do, he put his arms around her. Ariel put her head on his shoulder so naturally, as though she'd done it hundreds of times. Ethan put one arm securely around her waist and stroked her hair. Ethan wasn't sure if she was crying because she loved Cal or out of a more general feeling of heartbreak, but Ethan thought grimly that it would be better if Cal stayed away from him for the foreseeable future. He might get a whole lot more than just a punch this time.


	7. Chapter 7

**Tato Potato** , Ariel is very lucky - imagine if she'd had Cal looking after her! But Ethan isn't so lucky. Cal's put him in a difficult situation - again! Thank you for your review.

 **beckyboogle** , I think Cal and Ariel probably will be angry and shocked when they find out what Ethan's done - there could be some difficult moments ahead for Ethan! Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. It is all very tense - Ethan was technically doing his job correctly, but he's really in a mess now!

 **Tanith Panic** , I'm glad Cal is getting a little bit of sympathy - he doesn't know what he's done and he might even do the right thing if he found out the truth. Thank you for your review - I'm glad you think it's coming along nicely.

* * *

Ethan hoped no-one would catch him. He knew that what he was doing was a bit unusual for a doctor to do for his patient, but Ariel wasn't just his patient. She was his nephew and niece's mother and that made it completely different.

He opened the door and smiled at Ariel, relieved that she wasn't crying now. "Hello," he said, feeling slightly shy.

Ariel's face lit up. "Hi, Ethan."

"I come bearing good news," said Ethan. "You're free to go – but not until you've had something to eat." He brought out what he'd been hiding behind his back: a bowl, a spoon, a pot of clotted cream and some raspberries. "You don't have to have the raspberries if you don't want them. I just saw them and thought they might go well with the cream."

"Ethan, that's so sweet of you!" exclaimed Ariel. "You shouldn't have. Are you this lovely to all your patients?"

"I… um… I hope so," said Ethan awkwardly. "But every patient is an individual so they don't all need the same things - and of course, it could be said that you're three patients rather than one."

"That's very true!" said Ariel. "Thank you so much, Ethan. I love raspberries. I don't suppose you'd like to stay and help me eat them? I'm sure you're much too busy, but I'd love to share them with you. You really deserve it after all the trouble you've been to to hide me from Cal."

Ethan felt himself blushing. "I'd have to go and get another spoon… oh, and another bowl, of course… but thank you. I'd be delighted to join you in a bowl of strawberries and cream."

Ariel giggled, her eyes sparkling with amusement, and Ethan blushed even more.

"Oh my goodness. I am so sorry, Ariel. I didn't mean literally joining you in a bowl of strawberries and cream." Ethan tried not to think about what that would be like. Trying not to think about something was usually a sure-fire way of making him think about it. "Um, I'll, um, go and get a spoon. And a bowl. Yes. A spoon and a bowl."

* * *

Cal had spent the whole afternoon thinking about the girl. She insisted she didn't know them and he thought she'd almost certainly have remembered him, but he still had a nagging feeling that he remembered her.

It didn't particularly surprise him that his memory was hazy. After all, there were too many girls to remember and he was drunk more often than not.

But the more he thought about it, the more he was convinced he hadn't made a mistake. He was sure he remembered her golden curls splayed out on the pillow as she looked adoringly into his eyes. Of course, there had been a lot of curly-haired blonde girls and most of them looked at him adoringly, but…

"Dr Knight!" said Connie. "You seem very distracted this afternoon. What's her name?"

"I can't remember," said Cal. That was just one of the things that frustrated him. If he'd been able to come up with her name, maybe she wouldn't have denied their encounter.

Connie made a disgusted face. "I might have known."

"I was drunk!" said Cal, as though that made it better.

"I really think it's best if we don't continue this conversation, Dr Knight."

"You started it," Cal said unwisely.

"Yes, because I thought that was the best way of getting you to admit you were dreaming instead of listening to what I was saying," said Connie. She checked the time. "Okay, your shift doesn't officially finish for another fifteen minutes, but I've had quite enough of you. You can go, but try to come back in a more professional frame of mind tomorrow."

Cal felt guilty. He did actually love his job, but he was the first to admit his thoughts had been drifting lately. Usually in the direction of girls, but not for the usual reason. For some reason, thinking about girls made him feel sad.

"Dr Knight?" Connie was looking at him strangely. "Are you all right?"

Cal came back down to earth again. "Yes, of course. Sorry, Mrs Beauchamp. I was just thinking."

Connie didn't ask for details. Cal felt relieved, then disappointed. It would be so good if, just for once, somebody showed an interest.

He went to get changed. He called goodbye to a few people on his way out, but not many people replied. Some were too busy; others might not have heard, but it made him a little sad to be leaving on his own. He knew that if he went to the pub now, he would soon be joined by various colleagues, but he couldn't help wondering if any of them would really be glad to see him. Maybe he was just someone to talk to; someone to buy a round; someone to laugh at occasionally for doing something stupid or to roll their eyes at when he found yet another girl to share his bed for the night.

Cal sighed as he left the building. The pub didn't appeal to him tonight. He glanced around to check he wasn't about to be run over by an ambulance and his attention was caught by two people, standing by a taxi.

It was Ethan and the girl.

Now she was standing, she seemed even more familiar. Even Ethan managed to make her look small, so she'd be barely up to Cal's elbow (well, actually she'd be quite a lot taller than his elbow, but she was definitely small). She was wearing a loose, baggy dress that hid her figure, but her breasts looked large and full.

She was looking up at Ethan and smiling. Ethan was smiling back, looking terribly embarrassed but rather pleased. Cal found himself edging closer, trying to hear what they were saying. It was none of his business, of course: particularly as she was Ethan's patient and their conversation might be private, but he couldn't help himself. He really wanted to know who she was.

* * *

"Oh! I almost forgot," said Ethan suddenly. He pulled a folded piece of paper out of the pocket of his scrubs and looked nervously at Ariel. They'd been getting on better than ever since they'd shared the strawberries and cream (though he had been embarrassed when Ariel had told him he had cream all over his mouth) but he wasn't sure how she'd react to this. "I realise I might be overstepping the mark here and it's possible you might have all this information already, but I just wanted to make absolutely sure that you knew what help was available to you in case you need it."

He handed the piece of paper to Ariel, who unfolded it. He saw her frown slightly as she took in the names, websites and numbers of the organisations he'd thought might be useful: all organisations that might offer support to a single expectant mother.

"I'm not saying that you ought to phone any of these numbers," said Ethan. "I know you're managing at the moment so you wouldn't have any need of them now, but I thought it might be helpful to have all the information in one place Just in case. If it's not helpful, you can always throw it away. I won't be offended."

Ariel looked up and smiled. "Of course I'm not offended, Ethan. Thank you. It's a very kind thought. I have had contact with the first two organisations on the list and I'm afraid my experience wasn't very positive, but I shouldn't give up on help just because the first people I tried weren't very nice."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear you had a bad experience," said Ethan. "Would you like to tell me about it? So I can be sure not to recommend them next time?"

Ariel shook her head. "It's okay, Ethan. I just explained badly – I was very nervous - and the woman jumped to the wrong conclusion. I'm in no hurry to contact their organisation again, but it wasn't really their fault."

"However badly you might have explained it, you're still entitled to respect," said Ethan. Then he saw the stressed look on her face. "But it's entirely your decision and I think you have quite enough to worry about now without me putting pressure on you."

"I'm sure you're right, Ethan," said Ariel. "I don't want anyone else to have the same experience as me, and perhaps it is my responsibility to stop it. And maybe I should think about it. But at the moment…"

Ethan smiled reassuringly. "At the moment, your priority is your family." he said, nodding towards the bump, mostly hidden in the folds of her dress. "That's exactly as it should be."

Ariel gave him a grateful look. She looked back at the piece of paper and her eyes travelled down to the end of the list and then stopped. She raised puzzled eyes to Ethan's. "Is this your phone number?"

Ethan nodded. "I just thought if there was anything I could do… as a doctor or as a friend… then you'd be able to contact me. You don't have to. I think you're a very capable and intelligent young lady and you almost certainly won't need me to do anything. But… in case you do…"

"Thank you," said Ariel. "You've been so kind, Ethan. You've been to so much trouble. It's good to know I can count you as a friend." She bent forward and kissed his cheek.

"Always," said Ethan.


	8. Chapter 8

**ETWentHome** , it's difficult to know how Cal will react - he might be absolutely thrilled about being a dad! But I can't blame Ethan and Ariel for having doubts. Thank you for your review.

 **Tato Potato** , thank you for your review. You never quite know with Cal - he loves Matilda, but he won't necessarily feel the same way about unborn children with a mother he can't quite remember!

 **Tanith Panic** , I love the contrasts between them too - I usually tend to focus on Cal's sweet side (which might or might not make an appearance later), but in this story, he's a bad boy! Thank you for your review.

 **beckyboogle** , thank you for your review. Here is what happens next! I hope you enjoy it.

* * *

Cal still couldn't hear anything. They were talking so softly; so intensely. Ethan stood protectively close to her and once or twice, Cal heard the sound of laughter. The wind rippled through her curly hair and he was hit by a memory of holding a curl in his hand: stretching it almost straight and then gently letting it go. It was just a fleeting memory and he remembered only the hair, not the face, but he was certain. This was the same girl.

He wondered for a moment if there was more between them than just being a doctor and patient. Ethan looked so comfortable as he stood talking to her. But it must be a very new relationship or Cal was sure he would have known and it always took Ethan weeks, if not months to become comfortable with a girl. Perhaps they had been together for longer than that and Cal just hadn't realised it... but no. That was impossible. Ethan would never have treated her if she was his girlfriend - and probably not if she'd been his friend. Ethan only broke the rules when Cal left him with no choice.

He watched as Ariel tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. He'd seen her do that too.

But there had been so many girls. A fair number with blonde, curly hair.

The girl leaned forward and kissed Ethan on the cheek. Predictably, Ethan went bright red. He lowered his head and shuffled his feet. Cal knew Ethan well enough to be certain he'd enjoyed the kiss, but the girl might not realise that. He hoped her feelings weren't hurt.

Cal took another step closer and his foot hit something: an empty coke can. It went clattering across the path, attracting the attention of Ethan and the girl. They looked at him and the girl froze. The expression on her face was one of pure terror. Ethan was pale now. He bent his head and spoke quietly to the girl. Then he reached for the handle of the taxi door.

She was leaving. She was walking out of Cal's life and if he didn't ask her now, he might never have the opportunity.

He broke into a run and was beside the taxi before Ethan had had time to slam the door. Cal caught the edge of the door, risking crushing his fingers, and put his head inside the taxi. "Wait! What's your name?"

Her eyes widened with panic, then Cal felt Ethan's hand on his shoulder.

"Dr Knight, is there a reason why you're bothering my patient?"

"She doesn't look like your patient to me," said Cal. "It looks to me like you've discharged her."

"Nevertheless, please stop bothering her," said Ethan. "My patient has had a very difficult day – she has been in the emergency department of a hospital, in case you hadn't realised – and she wants to go home. The last thing she needs is to be molested by doctors."

Cal was amused. "Then maybe we should _both_ step away from the taxi."

"Maybe we should," said Ethan. He took Cal's arm and tried to drag him away.

"All I want is to know her name," said Cal. "I think I know her. I'm sure I do." He looked back at Ariel and saw she had tears in her eyes and was hit by another memory. She had cried in his arms. He didn't know why, but he was sure e wasn't the one who had made her cry. "I do know you, don't I? Why can't you just admit it? We slept together!"

"Dr Knight!" shouted Ethan. He dragged Cal away forcefully and shoved him away, causing him to stagger slightly. Ethan bent down, putting his head inside the taxi as Cal had done. "Miss Hennessey, I apologise unreservedly for my colleague's outburst. I really am so sorry. If you'd like to make a complaint, you are perfectly within your rights and you'll have my full support." He waited for a reply, which was, if it came, too soft for Cal to hear. "Okay. Good luck, Miss Hennessey. And remember: if ever you need help, you just need to… you have the information I gave you."

Cal watched as the taxi drove away. Now the moment of anger and frustration had passed, he was appalled by his actions. He had no right either to demand the girl's name or to shout out within a taxi driver's hearing that he'd slept with her. He shouldn't have embarrassed and humiliated her like that. If she wanted to lie, that was her choice – and she might not have been lying as much as showing understandable reluctance to discuss her sex life in a public place.

And now he thought about it, if he couldn't remember her name, he couldn't really expect her to remember his.

"Caleb, what's wrong with you?" Ethan looked upset. His voice was almost shaking. "I'm really sorry, but I'm going to have to report you to Mrs Beauchamp. I know you're my brother, but the way you've behaved towards my patient…" Ethan momentarily lost the power of speech and Cal quickly rushed in.

"You're right, Ethan. I never should have said that. I was just so sure I'd slept with her and I couldn't understand why she was lying."

Ethan glared at him. "If she is lying, it might be because she didn't want to remember you."

"Maybe," sighed Cal. He knew there were a lot of women who did think that; who blanked him in the street or decided to walk the other way. It made him sad. All h' wanted was to have fun. He never wanted to hurt them.

"Or perhaps she simply hasn't slept with you," said Ethan. "You might have made a mistake. Did you ever think of that? Did you ever think what it might be like for her, having a complete stranger accost her out of nowhere and claim she'd indulged in incredibly intimate behaviour with him? Did you ever think how distressing it might be for her? No, because you never do think about anyone but yourself!"

Cal was looking at Ethan in concern. His voice was trembling and he looked deeply upset. "Ethan, what's up?"

Ethan sighed and pushed his hands through his hair. "There's nothing wrong, Cal. It's been a long day, that's all. Why don't you go home."

* * *

Ethan didn't know if he was glad or disappointed that Ariel didn't phone him. It would have been awkward, living with Cal and being friends with the mother of Cal's children. It would make it even more difficult for him to keep what had now become a whole collection of secrets. He didn't want Cal to know that Ariel was having his babies and he didn't want Ariel to know that he was Cal's brother.

Well, no: that wasn't quite true. He wanted both of them to know the truth. He wanted Cal to take responsibility for once. He wanted Ariel to have Cal's support. But he also wanted to respect Ariel's wishes.

It made life easier if he had no more contact with her. As it was, he was just keeping patient confidentiality. If Ariel phoned him, they would be friends. That would mean there was no professional barrier to his telling Cal. That would mean he had a very difficult decision to make. He was relieved not to have to make that decision.

But he was still sad she hadn't made contact. They'd only known one another for a short time, but he'd liked her. Not just because he found her attractive. He genuinely liked her. In other circumstances, he'd have wanted to be friends – and that wasn't something Ethan had thought about many people in his life. He wasn't sure he had any friends in Holby. Lofty and Max probably only tolerated his occasional presence in the pub for Cal's sake. Lily might be a friend, but it was very difficult to say.

He'd felt comfortable with Ariel. Despite the worrying situation, they'd had fun. She was sweet and perceptive and she made him smile.

But it would have been horribly awkward, Ethan reminded himself. It was better this way.

Much better.

* * *

Cal didn't know what was wrong. He'd taken a couple of days off because he'd felt tired and achey and thought he was getting the flu. As he had recently treated a flu victim, there was a chance he'd caught it from her. But further flu symptoms had not materialised and Cal was forced to admit he probably wasn't ill at all.

If he was honest, he wasn't surprised. He'd never really thought it was flu. That had been Ethan's idea and Cal hadn't argued because the idea of taking a few days off work sounded so good. He'd also thought he might get a bit of sympathy out of Ethan if he was ill. Their relationship had been strained ever since the incident with Ethan's patient. It had improved over the last couple of weeks, but things weren't back to normal yet.

"Feeling any better?" Ethan asked when he got home.

"I don't think I've got flu," said Cal.

Ethan felt his forehead. "You don't have a temperature. It's probably some other virus. I can tell you're not right. Have you had any other symptoms?"

Cal shook his head. "I just feel really tired and… I don't know."

"Have you had anything to eat?" said Ethan.

Cal nodded.

"Then I'm even more worried," said Ethan. "Either you're lying to me or you washed up the plate and put it away."

"Okay. I haven't eaten anything," said Cal.

Ethan looked even more concerned. "I'll go and make dinner, but I can bring you a biscuit if you're hungry now."

"No. Not hungry," said Cal.

"And there's nothing else I can get you?"

Cal shook his head sadly. He felt as though there was something he needed, but he couldn't think what it was. All he knew was that it wasn't food or drink or anything else Ethan could provide.

"I'll make you some dinner anyway," said Ethan. He patted Cal's shoulder. "I'll see you later. I'm sure you'll feel better in a day or two."

Once Ethan had gone, Cal flopped back against his pillows.

He knew he wouldn't feel better in a day or two. He just knew it.


	9. Chapter 9

_I'm sorry for not updating this on Saturday - I'm finding this story very difficult to write and I didn't have a new chapter ready. But I've caught up now and actually written Chapter 10 too so I hope I'll be able to keep to my updating schedule from now on._

 **Tato** **Potato** , I agree that Cal needs to find out - not least because he'll be a brilliant dad - but Ethan will either have to convince Ariel it's the right thing to do or break his promise! Eventually, the truth will come out though. Thank you for your review.

 **beckyboogle** , Cal could well be very annoyed with Ethan! He'll probably expect Ethan to have more loyalty to his brother than his patient. Thank you for your review - I'm really happy you're enjoying it.

 **ETWentHome** , it is still a mystery for now, but it won't stay that way forever! I won't tell you the answers to your questions yet, but one will be answered in this chapter and one in Chapter 12. So I hope that won't be too long a wait! Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , thank you for your review - this story is quite slow, so I'm really relieved to know it isn't dull. I can't write a chapter without a bit of brotherly bonding - but I'm sure the friction won't be helping Cal's mood.

* * *

Cal definitely wasn't feeling better the following day. He managed to drag himself into work, only for Connie to call him into her office as soon as she saw him.

"How are you feeling, Dr Knight?"

"Much better, thanks," he said untruthfully.

"Then I'll get straight to the point," said Connie. "I'm afraid there's been a complaint about your behaviour."

Cal resisted the urge to bang his head against Connie's desk. "Another one?"

"Yes - another one relating to sexual misconduct."

Cal closed his eyes and very nearly did put his head on Connie's desk. "Mrs Beauchamp, I swear, I haven't even looked at a girl for months."

"Who said anything about a girl?" said Connie.

Cal looked up to discover her eyes were sparkling with amusement. "Oh God, it's him, isn't it? The homophobic guy?"

"It's a Mr Norris," said Connie. "He drove into a girl on a bike and was then treated by you. It looks like you treated him rather too well."

"I treated him better than he deserved," said Cal, though he felt a pang as he remembered he hadn't treated the girl well at all.

"Dr Knight, I would be forced to sack you if you had treated this patient as he deserved," said Connie. "Now, I'm aware this is one of the most ridiculous complaints I've ever received – and I do receive a lot of ridiculous complaints – but I do have to ask you a few questions about the incident. Did you do anything to make the patient believe you were gay?"

"Yes. I did my hair and checked myself out in the mirror," said Cal. He hesitated. "And when he accused me of being gay, I might not have denied it, but I also didn't confirm it. And it's not like I was implying anything bad. So what if some guys prefer each other to the ladies? Nothing wrong with that!"

"I quite agree," said Connie. "However, in our job, our first duty is to the patient. Some patients come in here with beliefs we might find awkward or indeed completely disgusting. However, unless we have reason to believe someone is being harmed by this belief – and I am referring to specific individuals rather than unknown gay men who might be unfortunate enough to come into contact with this ignorant imbecile - all we can do is pretend to respect their opinions and get on with our job. You deliberately and needlessly gave a false impression in order to make a patient feel uncomfortable."

Cal had to admit it didn't seem nearly as harmless when she put it like that.

"So I'll be sending you on a refresher course to improve your interpersonal skills," said Connie. She caught Cal's dismayed look. "And don't look at me like that, Dr Knight. Believe me, you're getting off lightly."

"But I thought you understood why I did it!" said Cal.

"I understand why you _wanted_ to do it," said Connie, "and I'm sure I would have felt exactly the same way. But it must never go any further than that. Now, get out of my office. You'll be working in Resus today. I think even you would struggle to upset patients who are unconscious."

* * *

It was Cal's turn to go shopping after work, but as he wasn't well, Ethan didn't argue when Cal had asked him to do it instead. He drove Cal home, collected the shopping list he had made that morning, and went off to the supermarket.

Ethan was beginning to get rather worried about Cal. Although he had been physically able to stand the rigours of a day in the ED, he'd still had a terrible day. He still wasn't quite well, to begin with. Then, as soon as he'd arrived, he'd been hauled off to Connie's office because of a complaint that had been made against him. Ethan felt he was lucky to get off with the relatively light punishment of being sent on an interpersonal skills course, but he couldn't really blame Cal for not agreeing with that. It wasn't every day that you were praised for your attitude then punished for not keeping it to yourself.

The rest of Cal's day hadn't been any easier. He'd had to make a number of difficult calls; he'd lost three patients in succession; and also made a couple of mistakes which had resulted in tellings-off from Zoe and Lily.

Nobody could expect Cal to be able to cope with a shopping trip after a day like that so Ethan was happy to help out, but he had found himself wondering when Cal had last had a really good day and he was shocked to realise that he hadn't seen Cal messing around at work for quite some time.

He also couldn't remember the last time he'd seen Cal looking happy.

Clearly, he and Cal needed to have a chat when Ethan got home. He wasn't at all sure that Cal would choose to confide in him, but Ethan knew he had to try. If Cal was unhappy about something, he needed Ethan's support.

Ethan parked the car and went to get a shopping trolley. It was his least favourite part of the shopping experience. Despite the fact he went to the shops considerably more often than Cal, he usually managed to get into some kind of mess with the trolley. Even on the occasions when he did manage to detach a single trolley without any difficulty, he usually ended up with the one with the dodgy wheel.

"Now, I'm sure we can be mature about this," he mentally told the trolley. "If you come out without giving me any trouble, I promise not to overload you or make you crash into any other trolleys. I will be the perfect customer and treat you with respect at all times. All I ask is that you respect me in return."

There was a small giggle from behind him.

 _Oh God. Please tell me I didn't say all that out loud._

He turned slowly.

"Ethan!" said the girl.

"Ariel!" said Ethan, as he tried to work out if he was glad it was her or completely humiliated that it was her. "I'm sorry: I was just trying to form an amicable working relationship with this trolley."

Ariel smiled. "I heard. It all sounded very reasonable, but I don't know how well shopping trolleys understand reason."

"Even if they can, I doubt they actually have ears," said Ethan. "Considering they are… well… inanimate objects."

"Ethan, you're not the first person I've ever heard talking to a shopping trolley," said Ariel kindly. "You _are_ the first person I've ever heard being polite to a shopping trolley, but I wouldn't say that's a bad thing."

Ethan smiled. "I suppose when you put it like that…"

They both laughed.

"I'm sorry: I should have asked before," said Ethan. "How are you… all three of you?"

"We're all very well," said Ariel. "Not long to go now! Though it will probably feel like forever."

Ethan wondered if she'd had second thoughts about informing the father, but he decided that wasn't an appropriate conversation for a public supermarket.

Ariel came closer to him. "I can help you with the trolley if you like. There's a knack to it."

Ethan's gaze dropped anxiously to her bump. "I couldn't ask you to do that. Not… you know. In your condition."

"it's fine, Ethan," said Ariel. "I'll have to get a trolley for myself anyway."

"Or we could share," said Ethan, before he could stop himself.

He almost didn't dare meet Ariel's eye after that ridiculous offer, but then he realised she was staring at him in delight.

"Ethan, that's so kind of you! Thank you very much. I wouldn't usually accept because I don't want to overload your trolley – you did kind of promise it you wouldn't – but I'm actually not buying very much. I really only need a basket, but I find trolleys easier. Baskets make me feel a bit lopsided and I can't really put them down. Even if I did manage to bend down that far, I wouldn't be able to pick it up again."

Ethan nodded understandingly. "That makes perfect sense. But just to be sure there is no confusion, I suggest we put a basket in the trolley. Then you can put your items in the basket."

"That's a great idea." Ariel smiled and touched his arm. "It's so good to see you again, Ethan. Thanks for being so helpful."

"It's really good to see you too," said Ethan. "I've been… thinking about you. Wondering. Hoping you were okay."

Ariel looked startled, but then she smiled. "Really, Ethan?"

"Really."


	10. Chapter 10

**Tato Potato** , thank you for your review. That's a really interesting idea about Ariel and Ethan - I hadn't thought of that, but perhaps you're right! Ethan certainly does feel he is in some way responsible for the babies.

 **beckyboogle** , thank you for your review - it really means a lot that you like it. I'm finding this story a bit of a struggle to write. I know where it's going, but I'm not sure how it's going to get there!

 **Tanith Panic** , I'm sure a lot of people think aloud in a supermarket! It's lucky Ethan was caught by Ariel and not by someone like Cal! Thank you for your review - I'm really glad you think the writing is good. This isn't the easiest story to write.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. Ethan and Ariel do get on really well, but their friendship is full of complications that are about to get worse! I can't promise things will get easier for Cal either...

* * *

Ethan and Ariel smiled at one another, only to be interrupted by an angry voice. "Oh, for God's sake! Would you two just get your trolley or have your romantic reunion somewhere else!"

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" said Ethan, feeling himself going red with embarrassment. A bit of a queue had formed behind them and it looked though some of the people had been waiting for some time. "We'll just get our trolley and get out of your way."

Assuming he could trust the trolley to co-operate.

Ariel touched his arm and gently moved him aside. "I'll do it, Ethan. Watch how I do it. Don't worry: it really won't be dangerous for me at all."

Ethan hesitated but then reluctantly stood aside and watched admiringly as she extracted the trolley with minimum difficulty. "Thank you very much. There clearly is a knack – which you have and I don't!"

He took the trolley and began to wheel it away, with Ariel walking beside him. The trolley glided smoothly and easily without the slightest hint of a dodgy wheel. but he was careful to walk slowly so Ariel wouldn't over-exert herself.

For a moment, he wasn't sure to say, but then he remembered most mothers-to-be liked to talk about their babies. "So, is it two months to go?"

"Just over," said Ariel. "But twins often do come early, so it could easily be a bit sooner. It could even be today!" She smiled at Ethan and hugged her bump. "I'm so excited, Ethan. A little bit scared as well, but I'm sure that's normal."

"Completely," Ethan assured her. "I'm sure I'd be absolutely terrified if it was me!"

"Unless there's something you haven't told me, you'd have reason to be terrified!" said Ariel.

Ethan knew she was just joking and managed to laugh, but he couldn't help remembering there was something about her babies which he hadn't told her.

"I keep looking at baby clothes in all the shops and I just want to buy them all!" said Ariel. "But I'm mostly managing to rein myself in. I do have a few changes of clothes for them in various sizes, then once they're born and I know what size they are, I'll have to do a big online shop for clothes in the right size. I'll probably have to pay for courier delivery, but it'll be worth it." She glanced guiltily at Ethan as he reached for a bag of potatoes. "I'm sorry. I'm probably boring you."

"Not at all," said Ethan, and smiled at her. "It's good to see you so happy. Will you be having the baby at Holby?"

Ariel hesitated. "I don't know how much choice I get. I'll probably have to phone an ambulance and they might just take me to the nearest place. But I thought… I'm really sorry, but I thought it would be better to have it at St James'. I was really impressed by the staff and facilities at Holby when I was there: you were all phenomenal, but…" She lowered her gaze. "I don't want to take the risk of Cal delivering his own baby."

Ethan hadn't thought about that, but he could see it made sense. "It's unlikely that Cal would deliver the baby unless there was a real emergency, but I think you're very wise." He paused. "But if you wanted to, you could always phone me after the babies were born and I could buy them some clothes. If I'm not overstepping the mark completely."

A look of curiosity came over Ariel's face. "Ethan, why are you doing all this? Why do you care so much?"

"I… I don't know," said Ethan. He couldn't tell her the truth. "I suppose it's just… we talked so much in the hospital and I got to know you more than I would most patients. I suppose I've come to think of you as a friend."

Ariel continued to look surprised, but then her face softened into a smile. "That's sweet of you, Ethan. I suppose I think of you as a friend too."

Ethan smiled too. "Then, if there are any problems, you know you can tell me? It sounds like you're managing very well, but if you're ever, you know, struggling even a little bit..."

"Thank you," said Ariel. "I'm not saying it's easy and there was a slight issue with… sorry, can we stop here? I wanted some lettuce."

"So did I: thank you for reminding me," said Ethan. He moved the trolley backwards and they each chose one. "You said you had a slight issue with something?"

"Oh, nothing," said Ariel. "Just that man who knocked me off my bike trying to cause trouble. But it turns out there were witnesses who saw him driving on the wrong side of the road, so that didn't come to anything."

"I'm sorry you had to deal with that," said Ethan. "I think he's one of those men who's out for whatever he can get and will try anything." Without thinking, he added: "My brother had a bit of trouble with him too."

Ariel looked a bit surprised. "How did he come to meet your brother? Does he work in the hospital too?"

Ethan pretended to be very interested in the cauliflowers. "He… um… yes."

"That must be nice to work with your brother," said Ariel. "Is he a doctor too? What's his name?"

"Um… Caleb," said Ethan. "He… he goes out on emergency calls sometimes. Especially the dangerous ones. He likes being a superhero."

"You must be really proud of each other," said Ariel wistfully.

Ethan hesitated. "Well, this isn't something I'd say to his face too often, but I'm certainly proud of him."

"So, he was involved in Tim Norris' medical care?" asked Ariel.

Ethan wondered how he was going to get out of this without telling a direct lie. "He was, but they didn't get on terribly well. It seems Mr Norris is a homophobe and he tried to report Caleb for making inappropriate advances on him. But of course it wasn't true. Caleb would never do anything like that."

"How awful!" said Ariel. "Poor Caleb. I hope he doesn't have to deal with that a lot. I suppose it's something a lot of gay people have to deal with, but it's not right."

"I… think it's the first time it's been a problem," said Ethan honestly. His head was spinning slightly. All he'd wanted was to ensure that Ariel got round the supermarket without exhausting herself and suddenly he'd acquired a homosexual imaginary brother called Caleb who was a completely different person from his heterosexual heartbreaker colleague, Cal.

"I'm sure it helps that he's got you to look after him," said Ariel. "I mean, not that gay men need more looking after than straight men. I didn't mean that at all."

"I know you didn't. But everyone needs looking after sometimes," said Ethan. "As it happens, I do look after Caleb quite a lot – though that's due to his personality, rather than his sexual orientation. Caleb can be disorganised." He smiled and quickly changed the subject. "Is there anything you need in this aisle?"

* * *

They continued around the supermarket, gradually filling up the trolley and the basket. Ethan helped Ariel by picking up items from the lower shelves and Ariel wasn't at all embarrassed when Ethan accidentally pushed the trolley into a display of DVDs, sending most of them crashing down onto the floor. "It's okay, Ethan. Don't worry. I'm afraid I can't help you pick them up, but it wasn't your fault at all. It's silly of them to stack them up like that. An accident waiting to happen."

Ethan collected them all up and balanced them as best he could. "Do you think that looks all right?"

"It's perfect," said Ariel.

Ethan looked at the DVDs. "I suppose now I've touched them, I should buy them all?"

Ariel shook her head. "Of course not. It's not like you broke any of them. I'm sure no-one would expect you to do that.""

Ethan smiled at her gratefully. "Thanks, Ariel. I'm glad you're here. If you weren't, I probably would have brought the whole lot."

"Then I'm glad I'm here too," said Ariel softly.

"Though maybe I will take a couple for my brother," said Ethan without thinking. "It might cheer him up a bit. Especially if I tell him about knocking them over."

They both smiled.

"Are you shopping for just yourself or Caleb too?" said Ariel. "No, I'm sorry. That was nosy. You don't have to answer that."

Ethan hesitated. "Yes, I am shopping for Caleb. He lives with me. He hasn't been well so he couldn't go shopping today."

"He's lucky to have a big brother like you," said Ariel.

Ethan might have been amused by her assumption if he hadn't been in such a mess.

Though it wasn't really his mess at all. It was Cal's mess.

Whenever Ethan told a lie, it almost invariably something to do with Cal.


	11. Chapter 11

**Tato Potato** , it is very difficult for Ethan! It seemed such a harmless white lie at first when he didn't expect to see her again, but he's getting deeper and deeper with the lies now! Thank you for your review.

 **Gillian Kearney Fan** , thank you for your first review on this chapter! I'm glad you enjoyed it and I'm happy you like Ethan and Ariel's friendship. He might be at the birth - but their friendship does have a lot of complications.

 **ETWentHome** , there are a lot of similarities between Cal and Caleb, as Ariel might notice later on! But Cal can be short for various names and there's nothing to connect Dr Knight to Dr Hardy so I hope it's believable that she hasn't realised yet. Thank you for your review!

* * *

To his relief, Ariel agreed to let Ethan pack her shopping for her. Ethan was fairly sure she could have managed – it wasn't as though she'd bought anything very heavy - but he didn't want to take any chances. Not with his niece and nephew.

Or with Ariel, for that matter. She might never know it, but she was part of his family now and he wanted to do everything he could to help.

Not to mention that she was sweet and beautiful and if things weren't so complicated, maybe he would have…

No, of course he wouldn't. He never did!

Ethan picked up all the bags, making a mental note of which one was Ariel's. "Ariel, would you like a coffee or something?"

It was a dangerous thing to ask. Every minute they spent in each other's company, the closer they became and the greater the chance that Ariel might want to turn their interaction into a friendship. Much as Ethan wanted that, he knew it was dangerous. Sooner or later, they would reach a stage where Ethan would have to think about inviting her to his house for a meal and then what would he do about Cal?

He could hardly disguise Cal in the hope that Ariel wouldn't recognise him. He thought wildly of treating Cal to a holiday and then inviting Lofty or Max to pretend to be his brother, but he knew it wouldn't work.

Ariel smiled at him. "I'd love a coffee."

* * *

Cal checked the time again, convinced Ethan was late, only to discover that only five minutes had passed since he'd last checked. He didn't know why every second seemed to be crawling past at the moment. It was exactly the same at work. An hour in Resus felt more like six. Of course, that wasn't unusual. Waiting for someone to take that crucial breath or for the heartbeat to be restored could seem like hours, but even the simple act of wheeling a stable patient out of Resus seemed to take forever.

Usually, after a day like that, all Cal wanted was to go to the pub, but although Lofty and Max had asked, he'd declined. He'd just wanted to go home.

But now he was , he didn't feel any different. He felt just as tired and sad and worthless as ever. He sighed sadly and buried his face in his hands. He thought he might cry, but the tears didn't come. It was too much effort to cry.

He'd known for a while that something was missing from his life – and he thought he knew what that something was. The problem was he had no idea how to find it.

* * *

A conversation about names they liked; names they hated; names which names celebrity parents never should have been allowed to give their children; and Ariel's complete refusal to name her daughter after a Disney Princess kept them going throughout their coffee. Afterwards, Ethan offered her a lift home and, after only a slight hesitation, she agreed.

"That would be a great help, Ethan, if you really don't mind. I've completely given up on the bike now and it's quite a long walk."

"Of course I don't mind," said Ethan. He carried the shopping to the car. "I'll put your shopping in the boot, so please reprimand me if I get any ideas about driving off with it. Are you all right getting into the car? I know most women are perfectly capable of climbing into cars without assistance, but perhaps it's a bit different when there are three of you. Never having been pregnant myself, I'm not sure."

Ariel laughed. "I'll be fine, Ethan. But thanks for the offer."

On the way to Ariel's flat, they talked about cravings (Ariel now preferred salmon to clotted cream, even though she'd never much liked salmon before), swollen ankles and how to deal with contractions. While these subjects were outside Ethan's personal experience, he was able to offer medical advice.

"Do you have a birthing partner?" he asked.

Ariel shook her head. "There just isn't anyone I know well enough to feel comfortable with them seeing me like that."

Ethan could sympathise, but he was worried. He thought about offering himself for the task, but he didn't feel comfortable with that idea. He'd helped complete strangers to give birth, but never a friend. He hoped she'd be able to work something out. He was fairly sure that if she had the baby at Holby, an extra nurse would be provided to support her, but he wasn't sure of the situation at St James'.

* * *

Once they reached the flat, Ariel invited him in for a cup of tea. As Ethan had already had some in the café, he didn't really want more, but he found himself saying yes. Ariel showed him into a tiny flat which he was sure wouldn't be big enough for three and invited him to sit on a shabby and uncomfortable-looking sofa.

It felt as uncomfortable as it looked, but Ethan was determined not to show it. He looked over towards the tiny kitchen area where Ariel was making tea. "Are you sure you're okay? I could do that for you if you wanted?"

"Thank you, Ethan, but I really would be in trouble if I couldn't cope with making a cup of tea!" Ariel carried the two cups over to Ethan and sat beside him.

Immediately, a silence fell between them. Ethan felt nervous. He wondered if it was because of her closeness, but he decided it was more because they'd taken another step on the path towards friendship. Another step closer to the point where he'd have no choice but to tell Ariel that he was a complete liar.

"Did you contact any of the organisations I suggested?" he said at last. He'd resolved not to ask her as he didn't want to seem pushy, but they'd been silent for so long.

Ariel looked down into her cup of tea. "I haven't yet. I've thought about it. I've thought about it a lot. But I've experienced so much prejudice. Everyone wants to know who the father is. I haven't told them anything because it seems unfair on Cal – not that I really owe him any loyalty, but it would be awful if someone guessed it was him and the truth somehow got back to him. If you don't give the father's name, everyone tends to assume there are lots of men who could be the father. It's difficult, Ethan."

"I can imagine," said Ethan softly. Her hand was resting on her lap. He gently put his own over it. "It can be very difficult. The organisations shouldn't show prejudice, but I know it can happen."

"It's not really even about me," said Ariel. "I wouldn't really be asking for help for myself. It's for my two tiny babies. However they came into being, they had no control over it and they need help and support just as much as any other baby."

Ethan squeezed her hand. "I don't want to offend you, Ariel. But I know it must be difficult being all alone, so if there's anything I can do; anything at all…"

Ariel's eyes filled with tears.

"Ariel, I'm sorry if I…" Ethan put his arm around her. "It's okay. It's going to be okay."

Ariel rested her head against his shoulder and tried to stop her tears from falling. "I'm just so glad you're here, Ethan. If I didn't have you, I really would be alone."

"Well, I am here," said Ethan, as he enfolded her in his arms. "And you're not alone. Not now."

* * *

Ethan stood outside Ariel's flat and didn't want to say goodbye. "Are you sure you'll be okay?"

"I'm sure," said Ariel. "It helps just knowing you're here."

"I'll always be here," promised Ethan.

Their eyes locked. Ariel leaned towards him.

She kissed his cheek. "Thank you for everything, Ethan. That sounds so inadequate when I think of everything you've done. But I do appreciate it so much."

"You're welcome," said Ethan.

There was another pause.

"I'll see you soon, Ethan," said Ariel.

"I hope so," said Ethan. "And you know you can contact me anytime."

They said goodbye and Ethan went back to his car. He got inside and rested his head on the steering wheel for a moment. He knew there was no going back now. They were friends and he had to accept that one day, she might have to know everything.

And if that happened, he would lose her.


	12. Chapter 12

**Tanith Panic** , thank you for your reviews. I'm really glad you have sympathy with Ethan and see Cal as the bad boy! There was just never a right time to tell her. I'm glad you're enjoying it - this story is definitely the hardest to write, but knowing people are enjoying it makes me want to stick with it.

 **Tato Potato** , there's a chance Ariel will understand, but it all depends on how she finds out! It's bound to be a shock and some people just don't like being lied to. Thank you for your review!

 **ETWentHome** , Ethan really isn't comfortable with the situation at all! I hope it comes across that he and Ariel get on quite well - or could do, in other circumstances - but it's difficult for him to say anything without having to lie again or admit he lied! Thank you for your review.

 **beckyboogle** , thank you for your review. I'm really happy you've picked up on the tension - it's difficult but interesting writing tense scenes between two people who really like each other, where one of them isn't even aware there's a reason to be tense!

* * *

Cal looked up listlessly as Ethan entered. He was aware that Ethan was much later than he'd said he'd be, but he couldn't bring himself to care.

"Sorry I'm late," said Ethan. "I was helping a pregnant lady with her shopping."

He spoke almost defiantly, as though daring Cal to object. Cal just sighed: he didn't care enough to complain.

Ethan went into the kitchen to unpack the shopping. When he came back, he sat down beside his brother and looked at him for a moment. "What's wrong, Cal?"

"Wrong?" said Cal sadly.

"Yes: wrong," said Ethan. "Clearly, something is. You haven't been yourself for a while."

Cal could only agree with that, but he didn't know where to begin.

"Are you going to tell me, or do we have to play twenty questions?" said Ethan.

"I just feel… bad," said Cal, slumping against the side of the sofa.

"Do you mean ill?" said Ethan.

Cal shook his head. "I don't think so. I don't think I'm ill. I just feel… sad."

Ethan gave his shoulder an awkward pat. "Do you know why you're sad?"

"I don't know," said Cal. "Or maybe I do know. I just feel like I'm nothing. Not worth anything." He looked up at Ethan with sudden impatience. "What have I done, Ethan? In all my life, what have I really done?"

"You've saved a lot of lives," said Ethan. He paused. "Including mine."

"Okay, I suppose I am glad I did that," said Cal.

"Cal, you've made a difference to a lot of people," said Ethan firmly. "Not just saving lives. You're more than that. You try to help every patient as a human being. You don't just patch them up and send them on their way. You get more involved than that."

Cal's head lowered. "And what good has that done me? I've helped people, Ethan, but what have I got out of it?"

"A bit of job satisfaction, one would hope," said Ethan.

"Yes, of course," said Cal. "I do love my job, Ethan. There are days when the patients drive me mad; days when Connie makes me feel three inches tall; days when everything goes wrong; and of course times when I try my hardest and fight and go through everything I know and it's still not enough and I lose the patient. And it's devastating."

Ethan nodded. He looked sympathetic, finally. "Yes, it is devastating." He put his hand on Cal's arm. "Did anything like that happen today?"

Cal shook his head wordlessly. It had, by the ED's standards, been a really good day, but it had still left him feeling unsatisfied and sad.

"So, you're not happy with your job?" said Ethan.

"No, I love my job," said Cal at once. "It is sad sometimes; frustrating sometimes; and sometimes it's difficult. Sometimes it's impossible, but everyone expects you to perform miracles."

Ethan looked like he was trying to understand. "But you do love it?"

"Of course!" said Cal. "There are bad moments, sure, but there isn't anything better than making other people feel better. Curing illnesses and ending pain, or at least putting them on the road to recovery. Making body parts that don't work start working again. Discovering conditions that solve a whole load of problems and makes a real difference to their lives. And although obviously it doesn't always happen, I love it when they obviously trust me or if they're grateful for what I've done. To feel that connection with someone. To feel relied on by someone and know I can almost certainly deliver."

"Then why are you sad?" said Ethan with an edge of impatience. He looked tired and stressed, as was only natural after a day at the ED followed by a shopping trip, but his words hurt Cal all the same.

"I don't know!" said Cal in frustration.

"You must have some idea."

"Well, I don't, okay!" Suddenly, Cal had had enough. "I don't know why I'm even bothering! You obviously don't care. You just see that I've got a good job, good looks, a nice car and you assume I must be happy."

Ethan shook his head. "No, Cal. I didn't mean that. Besides, if that's the definition of happiness, I should be a lot more miserable than you. The only thing I can claim out of those three is a good job."

Cal jumped to his feet. "Fine! I have no reason to be miserable. I'm just being a stupid, selfish, moaning idiot!"

"Cal, I didn't say that," said Ethan.

"You didn't have to!" said Cal. He felt close to tears and was about to storm off to his room and indulge in them, but Ethan would probably only follow and give him more lectures. "I'm going out."

Ethan sighed. "I'm sure I don't need to ask where."

Cal glared at him. "Then I won't tell you!" He stomped out of the house, then rang the bell to be let back in. "Forgot my wallet and my door key." Another example of how useless he was.

"Cal, you don't have to go out," said Ethan. "Why don't you stay and at least have some dinner and we'll talk about this properly? I'm sorry if I seemed unsympathetic. I will try harder."

"Like I want your pity!" snapped Cal.

He slammed the door and left.

* * *

Ethan didn't know quite what to make of Cal's outburst. This wasn't the first time he'd talked about feeling worthless, but it was the first time Ethan had really taken him seriously. Everyone went through bad patches. As Cal had said, some parts of their job could be devastating.

But this time, he sensed, was different. It had probably been going on for several days and he was fairly sure this was the first time Cal had taken sick days for emotional reasons. There had been a couple of incidents of Cal walking out of his shift early (or trying to: Ethan usually had a good go at stopping him and was mostly successful), but he'd always been back the next day, ready to brave whatever the day might bring (almost certainly including a lecture from Connie). Cal had never taken a full day off just because he didn't feel like working. Even when he was ill, he often went to work anyway.

Ethan decided that when Cal got home, they would have to have a proper talk. Probably not tonight because Cal was almost certainly going to the pub and wouldn't be in any state for a serious talk when he came home – if he came home. Tomorrow morning, Cal would be hungover and he and Ethan were both working in any case. Maybe after work tomorrow, Cal would be feeling calmer and he would be able to explain more about how he was feeling and they could put together a plan of how to help him.

If he still wanted help. Ethan knew that Cal needed help, but whether he would accept it was an entirely different manner. Ethan's suspicion was that Cal was depressed, though as yet, he wasn't sure why. Perhaps it was a delayed reaction to losing Taylor – or perhaps he'd felt like this all along and the difference was now that he could no longer hide it. Or it could be something completely different.

Whatever it was, Ethan was determined to find out.


	13. Chapter 13

**Gillian Kearney Fan** , thank you for your review. Cal definitely will find out before the end of the story - probably in the next few chapters.

 **Tato Potato** , you'll find out more about what's wrong with Cal in this chapter. Thank you for your review - I'm really glad you're enjoying it!

 **Tanith Panic** , I think annoyance mixed with concern is something Ethan feels quite a lot when he's with Cal! There's certainly more of it in this chapter. Thank you for your review!

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. I'm afraid Cal probably isn't in a very reasonable state! I think Ethan has upset Cal a few times in the series by not knowing what to say.

* * *

Ethan was woken up from an extremely pleasant dream backpacking through the Lake District to find Cal shaking him and tearfully demanding that he wake up.

"Cal, what's wrong?" said Ethan, concerned. He sat up and put his arm around his brother. His concern faded slightly when he smelt the alcohol on Cal's breath, but he kept his voice gentle. "What's happened?"

"Why aren't I in a relationship?" cried Cal.

"I didn't think you wanted to be in a relationship," said Ethan.

"Of course I do!" said Cal. He waved his arms drunkenly to emphasise his point and almost took Ethan's eye out.

"Please be careful, Caleb!" said Ethan, and put his glasses on.

Cal sniffled again. "But why would any girl want me? I'm just nothing, Ethan! I'm just a useless waste of space who's saved a few lives, but what else? Slept with a few girls? More than a few and I know I gave them a good time, but I want more than that. I want someone to love. I want to come home every evening or morning or whenever my shift is and know there's someone here who loves me. I want to go through life not feeling alone: feeling that someone's there for me. Knowing I'm there for her too. Going through everything together, our lives shared and entwined. I just want to be loved and appreciated and cared about and valued, Ethan. That's all I want."

"Well, you could always phone the girls the day after you sleep with them like you tell them you're going to do," said Ethan.

"No point," said Cal. "Not fair to string them along if I know they're not the one, is it?"

"Oh, so that's why you do it, is it?" said Ethan. "Because they don't live up to your romantic dreams?"

"Yes, that's right," said Cal, and stabbed his finger in the air to emphasise each word. Then his eyes filled with tears. "I just want someone to love me, Ethan!" He flopped forwards and landed face-down on Ethan's duvet. "Why do none of them ever love me?"

"I'm sure some of them do," said Ethan. "You couldn't break their hearts if they didn't love you."

"Maybe I don't break their hearts," said Cal. He sat up and wiped his hands across his face. "Maybe I just hurt their pride. I'm not really with them long enough to break their hearts. But I want to be, Ethan! I do want to be."

Ethan stroked his arm. "I'm sure you'll find someone."

"When?" said Cal. He buried his face in Ethan's shoulder. "It feels like everyone in the world has someone except me."

Ethan suppressed a sigh and hugged him. He didn't know if the drink was making Cal more honest than he'd usually be or if it was making him talk rubbish – either was possible with Cal – but it looked as though Ethan wasn't going to go back to sleep anytime soon. "Cal, I haven't got a girlfriend. Most of the people at the ED are single. Me, Lily, Zoe, Max, Mrs Beauchamp, Dylan, Rita, Jacob, Robyn, Lofty, Dixie, Iain… It's not just you and you aren't even the oldest."

Cal's only answer was a sniffle.

"Cal, you need to go to bed," said Ethan. "We can talk about this tomorrow. It's late and we're both tired and you've had much too much to drink."

"I'm not drunk, Ethan."

Ethan sighed. "If you say so. But you still need to go to bed. I'll bring you some water and then you can go to sleep. Okay?"

Cal didn't move. "Want to sleep here."

"That just proves you're drunk!" said Ethan. He tried to push Cal away, but Cal clung to him stubbornly. He sighed and decided it would be easier to let Cal sleep there than to argue with him. "Fine. Do Whatever you want." Ethan lay down again and closed his eyes.

Cal put his head on Ethan's shoulder and sniffed a few times.

"Cal, there are tissues on the bedside table if you need one."

"I don't need one," said Cal, and wiped his nose on his sleeve.

Ethan tried to reach the box himself, but Cal was leaning too heavily on his shoulder. "Fine."

Cal carried on sniffing for a while, but eventually he stopped.

 _Finally_ , thought Ethan. _I can sleep_.

"Ethan?" said Cal urgently.

"Yes, Caleb?"

"I don't think I feel very well."

Ethan sighed and took him to the bathroom.

It was going to be a long night.

* * *

The next day, Cal was hungover, but he took lots of painkillers and dragged himself into work. He couldn't remember getting home, but he'd woken up in Ethan's bed.

"Did I get confused about where my bedroom was?" Cal asked his brother. It wouldn't be the first time. He remembered quite a few occasions when he'd woken up in the cupboard with the electricity meter.

"No: you were feeling a bit down and you needed a chat," said Ethan. "Perfectly natural after all the alcohol you'd poured down your throat. Then you fell asleep on my bed and I was too tired to kick you out. But perhaps we could talk after work? You, um, brought up a few issues that probably need to be discussed."

Cal had already been worried about how he was going to get through the day; knowing he might have said something embarrassing to Ethan didn't exactly help and the hangover obviously wasn't helping matters. Neither was the fact he hadn't got enough sleep.

But all through the day, he was assailed by sadness and loneliness. On one of his breaks, he went in search of Max and Lofty and discovered them laughing with Robyn. Their arms were slung around each other's shoulders and Cal felt as though he shouldn't interrupt. It hit him painfully that although Max, Lofty and Robyn were his drinking buddies, they were all really close friends as well (or close siblings, in the case of Max and Robyn), and Cal, like it or not, was excluded from that.

He went to look for Ethan at lunchtime, certain his brother would have time for him, but he was involved in a very animated discussion with Lily about the reports suggesting there was a higher risk of death in patients admitted to hospital at the weekend.

"But I would say we are less busy at the weekend," Lily was saying. "So we would have more time to give to the patients."

"That's true in our case, but a lot of hospitals have a reduced service at weekends," said Ethan. "So while an ED might be less busy in terms of numbers of patients, they would have a smaller number of doctors available so in terms of the ratio of doctors to patients…"

"Yes, that is true," said Lily. "From that point of view, a hospital with reduced service could be considered busier even if there are fewer patients. But waiting times will be longer so perhaps some patients might prefer to wait a day or two if it isn't an emergency."

"It certainly seems busier to me when we're short-staffed," said Ethan.

"Or when I'm on a booty call," put in Cal.

"Especially when you're on a booty call, as my workload effectively doubles!" Ethan spoke with feeling.

Lily gave Cal an icy glare, but he tried not to let that put him off.

"I suppose, even with no reduced service, no-one's going to go to hospital at the weekend if they can help it, are they?" said Cal. "Unless it's an emergency, they'll wait till Monday and have the day off work."

He had the impression that Ethan and Lily weren't overly impressed with his contribution. Cal was slightly hurt as he felt he was making a valid point that might well be related to the decrease in patients at the weekend – he wasn't saying he thought it was a good idea, after all – but soon Ethan and Lily were talking to each other again, ignoring Cal, and he wandered out of the staff room, having been forced to conclude that he had no real friends at all.


	14. Chapter 14

**Gillian Kearney Fan** , thank you for your review. It is a very difficult time for Cal - and he doesn't know half of what's been going on!

 **beckyboogle** , I'm really glad you like Ethan's caring side - I love a bit of caring Ethan and vulnerable Cal! Thank you for your review.

 **Tato Potato** , thank you for your review. I don't suppose Ethan really wanted to share his bed with his drunk brother, but he is a kind, lovely man!

 **Tanith Panic** , Cal says he's sorry for wiping his nose on his sleeve, but he was too depressed to move and he didn't want to use his hand. I had a feeling Cal would be able to justify his behaviour towards women in some way! Thank you for your review.

* * *

Ethan was waiting for Cal when he arrived in the staff room. "Shall we go to the pub then?"

Cal groaned. His head was still aching and a lecture from Connie on the subject of concentration hadn't helped matters. "I'm never drinking again."

Ethan looked slightly concerned. "Well, I have heard you say that before but not usually after midday."

"I just want to get drunk," said Cal.

"Okay. Right. I really don't think that's a good idea," said Ethan. "But we can go and have a quick drink if you want to."

"No, I don't want to drink anything," said Cal.

Ethan seemed half-worried, half-frustrated. "If I'm going to help you, Cal, you really need to work out what you want."

Cal sighed. "I wish I knew that, Ethan. There are some things I know I want. But with some things, I change my mind every day."

"Or every minute," murmured Ethan.

"What?" Cal was tired and confused. It didn't help matters when Ethan didn't talk sense.

"It doesn't matter. Come on: let's go home," said Ethan. "I'll drive."

Cal didn't argue. He sat slumped against the window, feeling exhausted, miserable and still not completely well. He wondered for a moment if he was depressed, but it didn't seem likely that he'd become depressed now. He'd been devastated when Taylor had left him; very low the first time he'd started to doubt himself, but everything was so much better now. He was studying to be a consultant. He was…

Cal realised he couldn't think of anything else that was good. Even the fact he was training to be a consultant was a mixed blessing. It wasn't as though he'd actually passed the exam. He didn't think he had much hope of passing it, though Ethan thought he'd be fine.

"Cal? We're here," said Ethan.

Cal got out and he and Ethan walked upstairs to the flat in silence.

"Shall I make tea?" said Ethan.

Cal shrugged and threw himself down on the sofa. He sat, staring off into the distance, until Ethan returned with tea.

"Okay," said Ethan. "Let's start with the things you know you want."

"Someone to love me," said Cal. He looked at Ethan with a small amount of hope that he might say the words, but he didn't – and he needed more than a brother's love anyway. "Someone for me to love."

"So, a girlfriend?" said Ethan. "As opposed to a one-night stand?"

Cal considered. "No, I don't really want a girlfriend. I want a partner. A wife. Someone to share my life with."

"Is it… is it _just_ a wife you want?" said Ethan, an odd note in his voice.

Cal stared at him. "Of course I just want a wife! There won't be any bits on the side, Ethan. Not when I'm married. It'll just be me and her. No-one else."

"I was actually thinking more of children," said Ethan. "Would you like children?"

"No, not _now_ , Ethan!" Cal didn't bother to hide his horror. "In the future, yes. Definitely. It would be nice to have a kid. But not till we'd been together for a while. I'm not ready for kids, Ethan. I'm only just ready to start looking for a relationship. It's much too early for kids."

Ethan spoke without looking at Cal. "Kids don't always wait till you're ready, you know."

"They do if you're careful enough," said Cal. "I'm always careful. And I don't have any kids, do I?"

"Unless the mothers haven't told you about them," said Ethan. "Because they think you won't be interested. Or because they don't know how to contact you."

Cal shrugged. "All the girls know I'm called Cal and I work at the ED. I wouldn't leave out an impressive detail like that. You'd think they'd want my money if nothing else."

Ethan stood up. "Well, I've obviously helped quite a lot. You seem back to your old self already."

"What?" Cal stared at him, confused and hurt. He raised his voice as Ethan walked away from him. "No, I'm not back to my old self! I'm a different person. That's why we're having this conversation!"

For a while, he really thought Ethan wasn't going to come back. Cal felt upset, not to mention confused. He didn't know what he'd done to upset Ethan so much. He could understand if Ethan wasn't happy about the way he treated girls – or the way he used to treat girls – but it wasn't as though this was news to Ethan. Cal had been doing it for years.

"Okay." Ethan sighed and sat down again. "I'm sorry. It's... it's good that you give the girls enough information for them to contact you if necessary."

"No, Ethan, that's what I _used_ to do!" said Cal. "I've changed. I hardly ever do it now. And when I do, it's usually only by accident because I've drunk too much. It's not something I _want_ to do."

Ethan nodded slowly. "So, you don't want one-night stands."

"No, I don't!" said Cal. "But I don't really know how to start things off apart from by taking her to bed. So I take her to bed."

A smile was tugging at the corner of Ethan's mouth. "So, you're asking me what you should do instead? You're asking _me_ for advice on how to talk to women?"

Cal hesitated. "Um… well... yes. But at least you've had a proper relationship. I've only had a relationship with a con artist."

"Well, I've only had a relationship with someone who was only going out with me to impress her dad," countered Ethan.

They looked at each other then began to laugh. Cal didn't think he'd laughed for a long time. It certainly wasn't very often that he laughed with Ethan.

"But I've had a lot more one-night stands than you," said Cal.

"Infinitely more," said Ethan.

Cal frowned. "Though I might not have has as many as I think. I remember waking up in lots of different places, but I can't always remember what happened the night before. I might just have gone to sleep for all I know."

Ethan gave a reluctant smile. "I'll spare you any comment on that. But as a method of finding the perfect girl, picking someone up in a pub is obviously not working. So you need to meet girls another way. Do any of your friends know any girls they could introduce to you?"

"What friends?" said Cal miserably.

"Well, you know. Max, Lofty, Robyn…"

"I'm just a drinking companion to them," said Cal.

Ethan looked startled. "No, I'm sure that's not true. Why would you say that?"

Cal told him about seeing them laughing together and feeling unable to join their conversation. "And they never talk to me about anything serious. They go to each other and leave me out of it."

"I'm really sorry to hear that, Cal," said Ethan gently. "But I'm sure, if you went to Lofty or Robyn, they would do whatever they could to help you. Max is understandably more concerned with his own problems at present, but I'm sure Lofty and Robyn would want to help."

"They probably would," said Cal. "But the thing about Lofty and Robyn is they would help anyone who asked." He sighed. "It's no good, Ethan. I have no friends."

Ethan looked like he was trying to think. "Have you thought about joining a dating site?"

"No way!" said Cal. "I'm not that desperate yet. I don't think. Besides, you can't tell what a person's really like online."

"In my experience, you can get to know someone a lot better online," said Ethan. "I say things online that I'd never dare say in person."

Cal was surprised to feel a spark of interest. "Oh, yeah? Like what?"

"Nothing that would interest you," said Ethan quickly, turning slightly pink. "And nothing that's relevant to your current problem. Okay, if you really have no friends, then you'll have to make some. How about, next time the Blues are playing, we go down to the pub and watch the match there? I'm sure there will be a lot of fans watching – and not necessarily just male fans."

"What: you want to go with me?" Cal said doubtfully.

A hurt look came into Ethan's eyes. "Are you worried I might cramp your style?"

That was exactly what Cal was worried about, but he didn't want to hurt his brother's feelings after he'd tried so hard to help him. Besides, Cal didn't want to go to the pub on his own. That would make him seem like even more of a loser than if he went with Ethan. "No. No, of course not."

Ethan smiled, but a bit sadly. "It's okay. I don't have to go with you."

"No, I _want_ you to go with me!" said Cal. "We'll have a great time. I think making friends would be good for you too."

"Oh… well… okay," said Ethan. He looked pleased. "If that's what you really want."

"It is what I want," said Cal.

To his surprise, he found it was true.


	15. Chapter 15

**beckyboogle** , thank you for your review - I'm really happy you're still enjoying it.

 **Tato Potato** , thank you for your review. I love it when the brothers help each other!

 **Tanith Panic** , I think Cal must be very careful about contraception as there are no known accidents - except in this story, of course! Thank you for your review.

* * *

Ethan spent much of the following day thinking about Cal. He tried not to think about him when he was supposed to be focusing on his patients or listening to something a colleague was saying, but whenever he had a spare minute, he tried to think of ideas that might help his brother.

It had shocked Ethan to learn that Cal was lonely. Cal had always been the one surrounded by friends, while Ethan had had few friends or none at all. When they'd first started work at the ED, that trend had looked set to continue. Cal seemed loved by everyone, while Ethan was shy and awkward and even struggling with his job at times, though usually only when Cal was watching.

But Ethan realised that things had changed. While Cal was still (strange as it sounded) his best friend in the department, almost everyone spoke to Ethan with warmth and friendliness when they weren't working. There were signs that he was valued and perhaps even liked by the team. Today, Zoe sought him out especially to ask how he was – she'd noticed Cal wasn't himself and had guessed that most of the burden of supporting him would fall on Ethan, which meant she was worried about both of them. Ethan didn't feel as though he could tell her very much, but he appreciated her kindness and made sure he said so.

Even Lily showed friendship and support in her own way. "You seem distracted," she observed when the two of them found themselves briefly alone in the staff room.

"Oh, I suppose I am a little bit," said Ethan.

"You can tell me what's wrong," said Lily abruptly. "If you want to. I will always listen."

Ethan managed a smile. "I know you will and I really appreciate the thought, Lily." He lowered his voice slightly, even though there was no-one else in the room. "I wish I could talk to you, but it's Cal's problem, not mine."

"Cal is a grown-up," said Lily. "He should solve his own problems. Not rely on you."

"I think some problems are too big for one person," said Ethan.

"Yes. That is what I am saying," said Lily. "If a problem is too big for you, you can tell me about it. If you want to."

"Thank you, and I'll keep that in mind," said Ethan. "I really do appreciate it, Lily." He only wished he _could_ tell someone.

Lily nodded briskly. "If you would like to talk, let me know. I must go now." She turned and left the staff room.

* * *

"I thought I might go to the pub," said Cal.

Ethan didn't hide his surprise. "Are you sure?"

Cal sighed and shook his head. "No, Ethan. I don't want to go at all, but Iain asked me to have a drink with him and what can I say?"

"You could always say 'no'," said Ethan. "That's what I say and it usually works."

"I know, but it's the first time for ages that somebody has actually asked me," said Cal. "So I've got to go, haven't I?"

Concern filled Ethan's eyes, but all he said was: "You don't have to go if you don't want to."

"But I do want to go, kind of," said Cal. "I like Iain and I think we've got a lot in common. We both like to live on the edge a bit. So maybe we'd get on."

"I don't know…" said Ethan worriedly.

Cal glared at him. "What do you mean, you don't know? Are you saying Iain wouldn't enjoy hanging out with me?"

"No, I'm sure he would," said Ethan. He paused. "I just don't want to see you get hurt."

"Hurt?" Cal stared at him. "What are you trying to say, Ethan? Are you saying Iain doesn't like me?"

"Of course I'm not saying that!" said Ethan. "I'm sure he does like you, but that doesn't mean he wants to be best mates and go out drinking with you every night."

"Did I say I wanted that?" said Cal, angry with Ethan because that was exactly what he wanted. A best mate. Someone he could go out with and talk to about how annoying Ethan was.

"No, but I'm worried that maybe that's what you're hoping for," said Ethan. "It's understandable if you are. You're lonely, Cal. You feel left out of the Max-Lofty-Robyn gang. But what you don't want to do is grab onto the first potential friendship that's offered and hope for more than Iain's able to offer you."

Cal glared at him. "Who says I'm doing that? I'm just going for a drink with a mate. That's all it is."

But it wasn't.

Cal didn't want a friend he could have a drink with very occasionally. He wanted a best mate. Ideally, a best mate who could introduce him to a really nice girl. He wasn't sure, but he thought Iain might have a couple of unmarried sisters, both of whom probably had several female friends.

Cal really wanted the evening to go well.

* * *

Ethan was still thinking about Cal as he let himself into the flat. Whatever his brother might say, Ethan knew he was hoping for the impossible: an instant connection with Iain followed by a strong friendship. Ethan knew this wasn't impossible. Iain was a nice guy and Cal was good fun. Ethan didn't doubt that they'd both have a good time.

But that didn't guarantee any kind of friendship and Ethan couldn't help worrying about how Cal would feel if a close friendship didn't materialise.

With a sigh, Ethan made himself a cup of tea, picked up his textbook and began to read.

When his phone rang, he checked the time, thinking that he'd only been working for about half an hour, but to his surprise, two whole hours had passed.

 _Funny how time passes when you're having fun,_ thought Ethan as he picked up his phone. He didn't recognise the number. Perhaps it was Cal, borrowing someone's phone to let Ethan know that he wouldn't be home tonight. "Hello?"

"Hi, Ethan. I'm really sorry to call you, but I don't know what else to do."

"Ariel?" said Ethan, with a mixture of amazement, happiness and fear. He'd been half-afraid she wouldn't contact him again – but also more than half-afraid she would.

He was glad to hear from her – he really was – but he was even more worried about the effect it could have on Cal now. He wasn't sure if Cal could handle a shock like this and he'd made it very clear to Ethan that he didn't see children as being a part of his immediate future.

"Yes. Didn't I say? I'm sorry, Ethan. I just don't know what to do." Ariel's voice wobbled.

"It's all right," said Ethan gently. "Whatever's wrong, I'll help you. Can you tell me what's happened?"

"I'm sorry, Ethan. I've been so stupid." Ariel began to cry.

"I'm sure you haven't," said Ethan. "And even if you have, we all have stupid moments sometimes. I tried to put the milk in the washing machine today. Just tell me, Ariel. It's fine."

"I've lost my keys and my purse," sobbed Ariel. "They were in my handbag. I don't know if they fell out or if someone took them. It's lucky I was on my phone at the time or that would have gone too."

It upset Ethan to hear how wretched she sounded, but he spoke as calmly and as soothingly as he could. "It's going to be all right, Ariel. We can sort this out. Does anyone else have a set of keys to your flat?"

"No-one," wept Ariel. "I don't really know anyone well enough. I find it hard to trust people."

"Then I'm honoured that you trust me," said Ethan, as a horrible feeling of guilt twisted inside him. He'd done nothing but lie to the poor girl since they'd met – and she _trusted_ him. "And I'm going to help you."

He thought quickly. Considering the situation with Cal, it would probably be safest to book Ariel into a hotel, but he didn't want her to be alone when she was so upset.

There was a good chance Cal wouldn't come home tonight anyway, but even if he did, Ariel would be in bed by then and she could stay in bed until Cal had left for work. It would be difficult, but Ethan thought he could probably cope.

"You can come and stay at my flat tonight," said Ethan. "I promise you you'll be quite safe. Tomorrow, I'll take you to the police station to report the theft and then we can make sure your flat is okay and get the locks changed. How does that sound?"

Ariel sounded even more emotional. "Oh, Ethan. You don't have to do all that."

"I know I don't have to," said Ethan. "But we're friends and I'd like to help you."

"Will Caleb mind?" asked Ariel.

"Caleb isn't here," said Ethan. "I'm not expecting him home tonight, but if he does come home, I'm sure he won't mind."

After all, Cal couldn't mind what he didn't know.


	16. Chapter 16

**Tanith Panic** , being on the fringes is horrible and it's also completely new to Cal. He's probably always seen himself as being at the centre of everything. Maybe Cal will be home earlier... thank you for your review.

 **CBloom2** , thank you for your review. Ethan has got himself into a very difficult situation and he's going to have trouble getting out of it! But he does mean well and I'm glad I've brought that across.

 **Tato Potato** , there will be a lot of trouble if Cal comes home! Even if he doesn't, it's going to be difficult for Ethan to keep them apart forever. Thank you for your review.

 **beckyboogle** , thank you for your review. I'm afraid I didn't update very soon, but I hope this chapter is worth the wait. It's hard to believe I used to make four updates on some days - I don't know where I found the time!

 **ETWentHome** , Cal badly needs something to hold on to - and in that situation, it's easy to grab on to the wrong thing. Both brothers seem to be taking risks at the moment! Thank you for your review.

* * *

Cal put another pint down on the table in front of Iain. "There you go, mate."

"Thanks," said Iain.

Silence reigned.

Cal searched his mind for something to say. He was sure it used to be easy. Of course, he did used to spend quite a lot of time boasting about his latest conquests and there weren't any now, but there must be _something_ he could talk about. "Are you looking forward to Christmas?"

"Haven't really thought about it yet," said Iain.

There was another long pause, during which Cal reflected that things were not going well. Maybe they needed to drink more.

"How about you?" said Iain.

Cal looked at him blankly. "How about me what?"

"Are you looking forward to Christmas?" said Iain.

"Oh… um… I don't know really," said Cal weakly. "I hadn't really thought about it."

"Ah," said Iain.

Cal tried to convince himself the poor man didn't look bored out of his mind.

Iain suddenly jumped to his feet and waved at someone. "Dix! Over here!" He looked rather guiltily at Cal. "You don't mind if Dixie joins us, do you?"

"No, of course not," said Cal. "More the merrier."

It was fair to say that, at the moment, neither of them were feeling merry in either sense of the word.

* * *

Ethan was anxious to get to Ariel as quickly as possible, so it went without saying that there were a lot of delays. Firstly, his bedroom lightbulb went. As Ariel would be sleeping in his bed (though not, of course, with Ethan), she would obviously need to be able to switch the light on so he thought he'd better change the bulb before he left.

On his way out, he tripped over something Cal had left lying around and wasted valuable seconds hopping and whimpering. Once he finally made it outside, he had trouble backing the car out of his parking space as the cars on both sides of him (one of which was Cal's) had parts of their wheels in Ethan's parking space.

When he was finally out of the car park and on the way, he found himself caught in a traffic jam.

Twenty minutes later, he'd completed the ten-minute journey and was driving up the road where Ariel had said she'd meet him, but there was no sign of her. Panic-stricken, Ethan stopped the car and tried to phone her, but her phone was 'unavailable': most likely out of charge, Ethan thought.

He started driving again and had almost reached the end of the road when someone stepped out of the shadows and waved.

Ethan parked the car and got out, hurrying to Ariel's side. "Ariel, are you all right?"

"I am now you're here," said Ariel. Her smile was brave, but her voice was trembling.

"Yes: I'm here," said Ethan reassuringly. "Are you ready to go?"

Ariel nodded and they got into the car. "Thank you for coming, Ethan."

"You're welcome," said Ethan. "I'm always very happy to help. How are the three of you?"

"We're okay," said Ariel, and her smile was genuine this time. "The twins are fine, though they've been doing lots of football practice, and I'm feeling much better now you're here."

Ethan smiled back. "I'm glad. I was actually about to start cooking dinner. I do hope you'll join me. I have salmon."

Ariel giggled slightly. "I do still like salmon, but I'm actually craving apricots now. I thought the cravings were supposed to stop in the third trimester!"

"Every pregnancy is different," said Ethan. "Every mother is different and every baby is different so it stands to reason." He paused for a moment. "It's also possible you're confusing mild desires for a particular food with pregnancy-related cravings simply because you're looking for cravings, but I don't think we should take any chances, do you? Let's go and buy some apricots."

Ariel put her hand over her mouth. "Oh, Ethan, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel... you don't have to buy me anything at all! Really."

"It's fine. I was actually just wondering what I should make for pudding," said Ethan, who hadn't been planning on making pudding at all, but he wanted to give Ariel the food she wanted without her feeling guilty. "Apricots sound perfect. I'll have to stop off at the supermarket on the way home, but I need a few things anyway."

* * *

Cal listened with a fixed smile on his face as Dixie and Iain reminisced about something that had happened a few months ago. Dixie had said apologetically that: "You probably had to be there," and Cal could only conclude she was right.

It certainly didn't seem very funny to him.

"Right: another drink?" said Dixie, getting to her feet.

Iain asked for the same again and Cal, after a moment's hesitation, did the same. He really wanted to go home, but he knew he was being stupid. He wasn't going to start feeling better unless he got himself some friends and he wasn't going to make any friends if he went home early.

Cal faced Iain and smiled. "I… um…"

"Yeah?" said Iain.

"I was just wondering if you… um…" Cal was seriously struggling. "...if you like..." He looked around the pub for inspiration. "...bar stools?"

Iain looked at him as though he was mad. "Bar stools?"

Cal couldn't meet his eye. He couldn't believe he'd said that. Not even _Ethan_ went around talking about bar stools!

"They're all right," said Iain. "They're... well, they're bar stools, aren't they?"

"Yeah," agreed Cal sadly.

He was sitting in a pub, drinking beer and having banter with a mate.

It was everything Cal thought he wanted.

But all he wanted now was to go home.

* * *

"Dinner's ready," said Ethan as he carried the plates out of the kitchen.

"It looks lovely," said Ariel. "Thank you, Ethan. I really appreciate how kind you're being."

"It's a pleasure," said Ethan. "Though I do of course wish it was happening in happier circumstances."

They sat opposite each other at the table. Ethan was struck by how comfortable Ariel seemed in his flat. She'd been nervous and unsure at first, but within moments of their arrival, they were sitting down and discussing medical research into twins. Ethan was very interested in all research and Ariel had become interested in the subject as soon as she'd discovered she was expecting twins. Although there was a lot she didn't know about and quite a lot she'd misunderstood or forgotten, Ethan really enjoyed talking to her.

Ethan ate a piece of salmon and washed it down with juice.

"Oh, didn't you like that?" said Ariel.

Ethan looked at her, surprised. "I liked it very much."

Ariel stared at him, then she blushed with embarrassment. "Oh, Ethan, I'm so sorry!"

"There's no need to be sorry," said Ethan. "If I didn't look like I was enjoying it, it was kind of you to be concerned."

"Oh … well… the thing is…" Ariel looked pinker than the salmon. "I wasn't actually talking to you."

"Oh, I'm sorry," said Ethan, wondering who she was talking to, but then he realised. "You were talking to the twins, weren't you?" He was blushing too now. "'m so sorry, Ariel. I wasn't thinking."

Ariel smiled at him. "You don't need to apologise either, Ethan. It was a natural assumption to make. I usually only talk to the babies when we're alone, but… I suppose I was just feeling so comfortable here, I relaxed a bit too much."

"You're welcome to talk to your babies as much as you like as far as I'm concerned," said Ethan. "It's actually very important for them to hear their par… I mean their mother's voice."

Ariel nodded. "I read about that. But the main reason why I talk to them is because I _want_ to. They're important. And even though I'm terrified because I don't know how I'm going to manage, I can't wait to meet them and hold them and look at them and just be with them."

"I'm sure you'll manage admirably," said Ethan. "And if ever you need help, I'm only a phone call away."

* * *

Ethan opened the door to his bedroom and then stepped awkwardly away. "There you are. I hope you've got everything you need. If not, you can always ask."

"Thank you, Ethan," said Ariel gratefully. "I'm glad I've got you. I couldn't have managed without you today."

"You haven't ever got to manage without me," said Ethan. "I'll always be here."

Ariel looked at him in amazement. "Ethan…"

"I think of you almost like family," said Ethan, perhaps a bit too honestly, but he wasn't thinking properly. Ariel was staring at him with those big green eyes and all he could think was that he could understand why Cal had been attracted to her.

"I think of you as family too, Ethan," said Ariel, her eyes shining.

And then she kissed him.


	17. Chapter 17

**beckyboogle** , thank you for your review. I'm glad you enjoyed the last chapter.

 **Gillian Kearney Fan** , thank you for your review. I think Ethan might also be wondering whether he will respond or push Ariel away!

 **Tanith Panic** , poor Cal really is left out! I'll have a job on my hands if I want him to be happy at the end of the story. Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , a disastrous drink is the last thing that Cal needs at the moment and it probably will make him feel terrible. Ethan might not be feeling that great either! Thank you for your review.

* * *

It was amazing. It was beautiful. It was wonderful. It was…

…a complete mess.

Ariel seemed to detect a change in him. She pulled away and looked at him for a moment. The light in her eyes dimmed and she lowered her head. He could hear her quick, shallow breathing and wondered if it was a reaction to the kiss or fear of what his response might be.

Ethan wasn't sure what his response should be yet.

"Oh, Ethan, I'm so sorry!" Ariel's eyes clouded with tears. "I thought you wanted… I really thought… I'm so sorry."

Ethan watched the tears falling down her cheeks and felt terrible. He didn't know what he could say. He couldn't explain his reaction. He couldn't tell her he was Cal's brother. Not now; not when she really needed him.

"I'll go," said Ariel in a choked voice. "I'll go and stay in a hotel…"

"No, you don't have to go," said Ethan. He touched her arm and felt a jolt of electricity. He tried to ignore it. He tried telling his pulse rate to slow down, but it didn't. His lips were still tingling. "Please don't go, Ariel."

Slowly, she turned to face him, her cheeks still wet and glistening.

"I'm a bit… a bit nervous of relationships," said Ethan. "I've never really had one before. I don't really understand how they work. I did kiss a girl on Valentine's Day and she seemed quite happy with it, but I wasn't sure what to do after that so… well, nothing happened and she went back to Manchester. But I do think you're beautiful. Very beautiful."

Ariel's mouth trembled as she looked at him. "I understand, Ethan," she said. "I understand."

"You do?" said Ethan, relieved.

"Of course I understand," said Ariel reassuringly.

She kissed him again.

* * *

Cal didn't usually drive home after a drinking session at the pub. A lot of the time, he didn't go home at all, or not until after his shift the following day. Even on the occasions when he did go home alone, he wasn't usually in any condition to drive.

If anyone breathalysed him now, they'd probably come to the conclusion that he wasn't in any condition to drive home today either, but Cal didn't feel drunk. Not at all.

He only wished he did.

He felt another tear slip down his cheek and wondered if things really had got worse or if he'd just been too arrogant to notice that nobody liked him.

Cal rested his arms on the steering wheel and leaned his head against them.

He felt as though something terrible had happened, but he didn't know what it was.

* * *

Ethan sat on the edge of his bed, Ariel's hand in his. She'd argued when he'd told her he was giving her his bed for the night, but he'd convinced her she needed to do it for the babies' sake. He was telling the truth when he told her that sleeping on the sofa gave you backache, but he still felt a bit like he was lying because he also wanted her to sleep in his bedroom so Cal wouldn't see her.

"Are you sure there's nothing you need?" said Ethan.

Ariel smiled at him. "Another kiss would be nice."

Ethan didn't see how he could refuse. He didn't want to refuse. But he knew their relationship could only end in disaster. She'd want to keep visiting him here. She would expect to meet 'Caleb' and eventually, she would. And then…

"Ethan?" said Ariel softly. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," said Ethan hollowly. He looked into her worried green eyes and he could see she had questions; questions she wouldn't be able to answer. Slowly, he leaned forward and covered her lips with his.

He liked the kiss, but he hated himself. In his own way, he was doing exactly what Cal had always done. Leading someone on. Knowing that eventually, he would have to break her heart.

He froze as he heard someone unlocking the front door. It was shut with a bang and then came the sounds of someone punching the wall. After that came a strangled sound which Ethan knew was a sob.

"I'm sorry, Ariel," said Ethan. "That must be Caleb and it sounds like things didn't go too well for him at the pub. I'd better go and look after him."

Ariel's face filled with sympathy. "Of course you must. Was it… a date?"

"I wouldn't say it was a date, but Caleb had high expectations," said Ethan. Another truth that felt like a lie because it was so misleading.

"Oh, poor Caleb!" said Ariel. "Is there anything I can do?"

Guilt filled Ethan all over again. "I'm really sorry to be so rude, but it might be better if you stayed out of the way. It sounds like Caleb is really upset so he's not going to be at his best with meeting someone new."

"That's not a problem at all," said Ariel. "I'm really tired so I'm not in the best shape for meeting new people either. I'll just stay here and go to sleep. You look after Caleb."

"Thank you," said Ethan, and stood up.

Ariel caught his hand. "No, thank _you_ , Ethan. For everything you've done."

* * *

Cal wiped his uninjured hand across his face and went to sit down. He couldn't quite believe what was happening to him. He'd known Ethan to come home from some kind of social outing and cry because it hadn't gone to plan (and that had been at least fifteen years ago), but with Cal, it _always_ went to plan.

Ethan arrived a moment later. "Cal, are you okay?"

"Fine," sighed Cal.

Ethan sat beside him. "Is your hand okay? It sounded like you, um, walked into something with your hand."

Cal couldn't be bothered to tell Ethan how silly that sounded. "It was a disaster, okay?"

"I'm sorry," said Ethan.

Cal could tell he meant it, but it wasn't much comfort. "I couldn't think of anything to say to him."

"You're probably just tired," said Ethan. "I'm sure it will go much better next time."

"There won't be a next time!" said Cal. "He's never going to invite me out for a drink again. I asked him for his opinions on barstools, Ethan. _Barstools_."

"They probably are quite relevant when you're in a pub," said Ethan.

"Iain had to get Dixie over, he was so bored," said Cal. "And they were kind of making faces at each other over the table, and then Iain suddenly remembered he was on the early shift tomorrow so he had to go and Dixie backed him up and I could just tell they were lying…"

Ethan looked sympathetic. "Maybe they weren't lying. Sometimes people seem to be lying when they're not because they're embarrassed by what they were saying – and I'm sure Iain and Dixie would both be embarrassed to admit they were tired."

Cal rubbed his sore knuckles and winced. "Why is it all going wrong, Ethan?"

"Well, you're not very happy at the moment, Cal." Ethan reached for Cal's hand and examined it. This time, Cal made no objection. Ethan touched Cal's fingers gently as he continued. "That can affect your mood, your confidence… and that affects your ability to socialise. Getting through the day must be even more mentally exhausting than usual so you haven't got any mental energy left for socialising."

"I've never needed energy before," said Cal. "I just talked."

"Yes, I know, but you were happier then," said Ethan. "Everything is more difficult when you're sad."

Cal gave a twisted smile. "So now I know what it's like to be you, little brother."

"I wouldn't quite say…" Ethan looked slightly offended, but then he stopped and spoke more gently. "How about I get you some ice for your hand and make you some dinner?"

"I'm really not hungry," said Cal.

"No, but I'm sure you don't want to make yourself ill on top of everything else," said Ethan.

Cal didn't have the energy to argue. "Okay."

"Good," said Ethan. He patted Cal's shoulder. "You will get through this, Cal. You will."


	18. Chapter 18

**Gillian Kearney Fan** , thank you for your review. I love writing stories where Ethan is there for Cal - as you've probably noticed!

 **Tanith Panic** , I thought Dixie and Iain would probably have ways of communicating without speaking - unfortunately, Cal noticed! Yes, I'm making both brothers suffer this time! Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. It's certainly quite difficult to imagine a meeting between Ariel and Cal going well!

* * *

Cal was used to waking up and groaning.

It was usually due to a hangover and there were quite often embarrassing memories as well, but this was one of those more unusual mornings when he had the memories _without_ the hangover.

Thinking about his conversation (or lack of) with Iain made him cringe (barstools! What had he been thinking?). Then he'd come home and cried in front of Ethan _again_.

Ethan had been very kind. He'd listened to Cal; tried to give advice; made Cal some dinner; even actively encouraged him not to do the washing up. At the time, Cal had been quite happy to be looked after, but he suddenly realised how odd it was. Ethan had been a lot kinder recently, since he'd got some idea of the extent of Cal's misery, but he'd been so kind and solicitous, it was almost suspicious.

Cal's eyes narrowed as he remembered the other things Ethan had done. He'd offered sleeping tablets; extra pillows; he'd even offered to sit with Cal until he fell asleep. It was true that Cal had been very upset – too upset at the time to realise that Ethan was doing anything out of the ordinary – but Ethan usually tried to talk Cal out of taking sleeping tablets and Cal was fairly sure this was the first time Ethan had ever voluntarily sat with him to comfort him.

What was he hiding?

Cal realised he hadn't felt this curious about anything for a while. He just hadn't cared enough. He just let life pass by and did what was required of him.

But Ethan with a secret was intriguing.

Cal got out of bed and went towards Ethan's room. He listened for a moment: he didn't actually want to wake him up, but if Ethan was awake, then Cal wanted answers.

Yes, there was definitely someone moving around in there.

Cal put his hand on the door handle, but someone was already opening it. The momentum sent Cal staggering into the room… and into the arms of someone who wasn't Ethan.

"So, that's his secret!" Cal burst out in triumph. "He's got a girlfriend!"

Ethan's girlfriend was staring at him in shocked horror.

And Cal realised he knew her.

He took a slow step away from her.

"What are you doing here?" she whispered.

"I live here!" said Cal.

The girl backed away slightly. "No! No, you can't live here! Ethan lives here with his little brother, Caleb."

"Er, no: his _big_ brother Caleb!" Cal corrected her. He tried to work out if he was flattered or not. No-one had ever mistaken Ethan for his big brother before, but Cal thought he was probably old enough now to take it as a compliment if someone thought he was younger than the baby-faced Ethan, who still got mistaken for a student at times.

"Little brother, big brother – what does it matter?" The girl's voice was high and panicky. "But you're not him. You're not gay and you're not called Caleb. You're called…" She stopped, appalled. "Oh God. I'm so stupid. Cal is short for Caleb, isn't it?"

Cal was really confused now. "Yes… is that a problem? And why did you think I was gay?"

"Of course it's a problem!" shouted the girl. "It means Ethan's been lying to me ever since we met… and I thought he actually liked me." She began to cry.

"Hey…" Cal tried to hug her, but she pushed him away. He felt her stomach press against his and looked down at it, feeling his eyes bulge. "You're pregnant…"

She faced him defiantly. "Yes, I am!"

"And it's _Ethan's_?" said Cal. He looked at her stomach again. At a guess, she was about seven or eight months pregnant, which meant she must have been with Ethan for… well, probably five or six years if Ethan had worked out how to get her pregnant!

But the girl was shaking her head. "First of all, it's not 'it'. It's 'them'. I'm having twins. And secondly, Ethan's not the father. It's you!"

* * *

At first, Ethan thought Cal had brought some woman home and there had been some difference of opinion that had led to a shouting match.

Then he realised he was sleeping on the sofa and that was because _Ethan_ was the one who'd brought the woman home this time.

Which meant that the two people arguing were…

All of a sudden, Cal's desire to run away from challenging situations made complete sense. Ethan would have absolutely loved to be able to run away and leave this whole mess behind him.

But he couldn't.

He stood up slowly and made his way towards the sound of the shouting, arriving just as Ariel told Cal he was the father of her babies.

"So, we did sleep together!" said Cal. "I told you we did." He looked down at her rounded stomach. "But wait… I can't be… how do you know they're mine?"

"Because you're the only man I've slept with for more than a year," said Ariel tearfully. "The only man I've ever slept with on a first date. I wouldn't normally do that. But you were different, Cal. You were…" She looked at him for a moment, then shook her head. "You seemed to be a nice guy."

"I am a nice guy!" said Cal. "But those are not my babies. They can't be. I always take precautions."

Ethan stepped forward. "You're a doctor, Cal. You should know that precautions aren't 100% effective."

"But…" Cal started, but he was interrupted by Ariel.

"I thought you were different too," she told Ethan, sobbing. "But you're just as bad as your brother. Worse!"

Cal gave Ethan a startled look that could have been funny but just wasn't.

Ethan was close to tears too now. "Ariel, no. I'm not like him. I'd never leave you. I'd never deny your babies were mine. And even though they're not mine, I would… I mean I'd be happy to…"

"Do you really think I'd let you anywhere near them?" cried Ariel.

Ethan swallowed a sob. "I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have lied to you. You told me Cal was the father and I thought it would be awkward if I told you Cal was my brother. So I… didn't tell you."

"Oh, _Ethan_ ," sighed Cal.

"I didn't know what else to do," said Ethan tremulously. "I thought it wouldn't matter. I thought I'd never see you again."

Ariel sniffed. "But you gave me your number."

"I _wanted_ to see you again," admitted Ethan. "But then we got closer and I couldn't tell you. It was too late. But you were asking questions and I kept tripping myself up…"

"So it's my fault!" cried Ariel. "Everything is my fault!"

"No, it's not," said Ethan as a tear escaped. "Of course it's not."

Cal was shaking his head. "Ethan, what were you thinking? Talk about having your girl and eating her too… and then spitting her out."

He took a half-step closer, but Ariel jolted away from him. "I've got to go." She darted back into Ethan's room. She emerged a moment later with her bag. "I can't stay here. I can't. Not with you."

It seemed to Ethan as though the words were directed only at him. "What about your keys?"

"Like you ever cared about my keys or anything about me!" Ariel ran towards the door, only to stop. She leaned her head against the wall and sobbed.

Ethan started to move towards her, but Cal stopped him.

"Don't you think you've done enough, Ethan? I get it was probably an accident – I know what you're like with girls – but seriously: did you really think you could get away with this? I won't tell you which part of your anatomy you were thinking with, but it wasn't your brain!"

* * *

Cal was aware that Ethan was crying, but he was more concerned about Ariel... the one thing Ethan seemed to have done right was to use her name. Now he knew it, he didn't know how he could have forgotten it. She was named after Ariel in _The Little Mermaid_. "Ariel, are you okay?"

Ariel turned to him, her face wet with tears. She was shaking hard. "I don't know what I'm going to do… I can't ask him… there isn't anyone else."

"Hey, shh, it's okay," said Cal. "There's me. I'll take you home. I'll do whatever you need me to do." He was still convinced the babies couldn't be his, or at least convinced that Ariel couldn't possibly be sure, but as a doctor, he was worried about her. He also felt as though he ought to make up for Ethan's treatment of her in some way… which was certainly a change.

He imagined that was what Ethan had been doing, to begin with. Making up for _Cal's_ behaviour. But then Ethan's priorities had changed.

"My keys got stolen… I need to get new ones," wept Ariel. "I don't even know how or where to go or anything."

Cal reached for her hands. "That's okay. I know what to do. I'll sort it."

"They are your babies, Cal," sniffed Ariel. "They are."

"We can talk about that later, baby." Cal knew they would definitely need to talk about it, but not now. "Let's just get you home first and I'll make you some breakfast. I know you probably don't want to eat, but you need to think of your babies."

" _Our_ babies."

"Sorry. Yes. Shall we go?"

Ariel looked at him a bit blankly. "In your pyjamas?"

"Okay. Right." Cal could tell this required a bit of thought. "I'll take you down to the car. Then I'll come back up and change. Okay?"

"Okay," nodded Ariel. She seemed much calmer now, but she was also pale and shaky.

Cal went to get his keys from the table (he was fairly sure he'd dropped them on the floor, but Ethan must have picked them up). "Come on. Don't worry. I'll sort this."

Her face lit up with gratitude and relief and with a sinking feeling, Cal realised she thought he meant the babies too.


	19. Chapter 19

**Tato Potato** , thank you for your review. I'm glad you don't blame Ethan! It was very unfortunate, but he and Ariel have both ended up getting hurt.

 **Bonnie Sveen Fan** , Cal has been told the babies are his... we've just got to hope he believes her! Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , Ethan really isn't very good with girlfriends! Though neither is Cal! Thank you for your review. I'm glad you can see all their points of view.

 **Tanith Panic** , thank you for your review - I'm so glad you're not disappointed! Maybe Cal can help Ethan - he knows about building bridges!

 **beckyboogle** , I'm sorry - this probably doesn't count as updating 'soon'! Thank you for your review - I'm glad you're enjoying it.

* * *

Ethan heard the door bang and knew they'd left. He was glad, in a way, that she'd gone with Cal and wasn't on her own, but apart from that, he felt completely broken and he couldn't believe what he'd done.

He'd meant well. He'd tried to do the best thing for everybody, but Cal did have a point. If he'd been thinking entirely with his brain, he would never have brought Ariel here. He could have booked them into a hotel. In separate rooms, of course, but somewhere Cal wouldn't find them. But even if he'd done that, Ariel would have found out eventually.

Ethan sat with on the floor with his head on his knees and cried silent, burning tears. He had to work later and he knew he'd somehow have to get himself into a state where he was able to work, but he didn't know how he was going to do that.

He'd messed things up with girls before. In fact, he'd done nothing but mess up his relationships, but never like this. He knew he'd disappointed and irritated his girlfriends (mostly irritated, he thought), but he didn't think he'd really hurt anyone before.

Now he had.

He'd always believed he'd be incapable of hurting any girl. Infidelity would be an impossibility. It had crossed his mind that he might hurt someone if she liked him more than he liked her, but he couldn't really imagine anyone liking him that much. He tended to lose his heart to anyone who was kind enough to show an interest. Including fortune hunters and murderers.

He knew he'd lost more than a little bit of his heart to Ariel. But he'd also lost his head and now he'd lost _her_.

Ethan heard the door being unlocked. He heard footsteps, then Cal appeared. Ethan registered in a detached sort of way that Cal was still in his pyjamas. They both were.

"Okay, now I know why you get so annoyed about clearing up my messes!" he said as he walked past Ethan.

"I didn't mean to hurt her," sobbed Ethan, but Cal had already slammed the bedroom door behind him.

A few minutes later, or possibly a few hours later, he came back out, now dressed in black jeans and a matching jumper. The look on his face as he regarded Ethan was black too.

"I don't know how you could be so stupid!" said Cal.

"Tell Ariel I'm sorry," wept Ethan. "Please."

Cal's expression softened just slightly. "Well, I am kind of avoiding mentioning your name at the moment. But if there's a good time…" He walked away.

"Cal…" Ethan held his hand out to him. He didn't know why.

Cal turned back. "Ethan, I haven't got time for this now. I'm busy clearing up your mess. Then I'm going to the hospital. Do you want me to tell them you're ill?"

"No… thank you… I'll be there," whispered Ethan.

Cal looked doubtful, but he said no more about it. "I've got to go." He started to walk away but then he turned back. "Look… don't beat yourself up too much. I know you didn't mean to hurt her. You told a white lie and it got bigger and bigger. I know what that's like. It's happened to me enough times! But it sounds like you were all she had."

"I was," sniffed Ethan.

"Well… she's got me now."

Ethan looked up at him. "You mean you've accepted they're your babies?"

Cal shook his head. "How can I take her word for it? She's obviously the kind of girl who has one-night stands and I always take precautions. We can't know anything until those babies have had a paternity test."

* * *

Cal hurried back down to the car. Now his shock at Ethan's actions had faded, he wasn't sure what he ought to do.

Well, his immediate actions were clear. Ariel needed to get back into her flat. He had to make sure she had enough food and give her any medical attention she needed. Then at some point, they'd have to have a chat about this baby thing, but he wanted to put that off as long as possible. Not just because that was a conversation he didn't want to have. He also felt she'd already been hurt enough today.

And it was Ethan who'd hurt her…

Cal still couldn't get his head around that. It was weird enough for Ethan to have a girlfriend, but for him to be lying to her had been as big a shock to Cal as it had been to Ariel.

Now Cal had cooled down a bit, he felt guilty for leaving Ethan. He'd never seen him so distraught. But he'd have to worry about Ethan later. Ariel was distraught too and she needed Cal's help _now_. Cal would be able to offer Ethan better comfort in a few hours when Ariel had calmed down and Cal knew exactly where Ethan stood with her.

Even so, Cal was filled with worry and regret as he looked back towards the flat, but then he remembered the girl who was waiting for him in the car. He couldn't keep her waiting any longer. All she wanted was to go home; to get away from Cal and Ethan's flat.

Cal hurried to the car and climbed in. "Ready to go? Then let's go."

He started the car, only to switch it off again when he realised he had no idea where they were going. He'd lost his keys to the flat on numerous occasions, but there had been no need to call a locksmith because Ethan had always come home from the hospital to let him in. Cal thought he'd more than likely lost the keys for his previous homes too, but as he usually tended to share with colleagues or rent a room, he'd never been in a situation where he'd needed to call for help from a locksmith.

"Do you know any locksmiths in the area?" asked Cal.

Ariel considered. "I've never lost my keys before, but I've seen a couple of places in Holby. I don't suppose you know a nail salon called Gail's Nails?"

Cal smiled. "Yeah, I actually used to go out with Gail. Well, I went out with her _once_."

"Yes, I thought perhaps it was only once," said Ariel, a bit sadly, but then she looked guilty. "I'm sorry, Cal. I shouldn't judge you when you're helping me. It's none of my business anyway!"

"No, don't worry," said Cal. "I was a bit like that when we met. But I've changed now."

Ariel looked as though she had a bit of trouble believing that.

Cal really couldn't blame her. "Okay, I know a lot of guys say that when all they really want is to get into a woman's bed. But I think I really have changed. It wasn't a decision I made. I'm just not interested anymore. I've only had a one-night stand once or twice in the last seven or eight months. I just… I want to meet someone special. I want someone I can love, you know?"

Ariel's expression was unreadable. "I've got two babies you can love."

Cal hesitated. "Yes. Of course. I'm sure they'll be adorable. But I'd like a wife too."

"I'm sorry, Cal," said Ariel. "I really can't offer you that."

"I know," said Cal, hoping that was because she still cared about Ethan. There was no doubting that Ethan cared about her. He really must be madly in love with her – with the emphasis on 'madly' - to tell her he had a gay little brother called Caleb.

"In some ways, it seems the right thing to do," said Ariel sadly. "The twins need their daddy. But we don't know each other; I have no reason to trust you and… well, I'm getting over someone."

Ethan, of course.

"Maybe it's not completely over between you and Ethan," said Cal.

Ariel turned away and stared out of the window at the car park. "I think the locksmith is near Gail's Nails."

"Then let's go," said Cal as he backed out of the parking space. "If Gail comes out and kills me, you'll have to get a taxi – but don't worry. It's only thirty seconds to the taxi rank from there."


	20. Chapter 20

**becckyboogle** , thank you for your review. I'm glad you enjoyed the last chapter - I hope you like this one too - it has quite a lot of Cal!

 **Gillian Kearney Fan** , thank you for your review - I'm really happy you enjoyed the chapter. This is the story I'm least confident about.

 **Tanith Panic** , I'm so happy you're enjoying it! There's quite a lot of tangled web still to be unwoven. I'm glad you liked Gail's Nails - it actually took me ages to think of that! Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. You could be right that Ethan shouldn't be working - he really is struggling to cope with the fact his lies have hurt Ariel. It must be interesting for Cal to be considered the trustworthy brother!

* * *

Cal unlocked the door of Ariel's flat, handed her the new keys with a flourish (even in the current fraught situation, he couldn't help showing off a little bit) and stood back so she could precede him into the flat. He followed with the bags of shopping he'd bought her and put them on the kitchen table. "Why don't you sit down, Ariel, and I'll make you some breakfast."

Ariel looked at him in surprised gratitude. "You don't have to do that, Cal. You've done so much already."

"It's no trouble," said Cal.

"I don't want to make you late for work."

Cal didn't tell her that even if he left now, he wouldn't get to work in time. "Don't worry about that. I'm not due in just yet. And there are… things… we need to talk about. But we'll worry about that after breakfast."

Fear came into Ariel's eyes, but then she nodded. "Okay. Thank you. As long as you have some breakfast too."

Cal made them both some cereal and they talked awkwardly about neutral topics. It was difficult as Ariel knew about as little about football as he did about One Direction, but he found he quite enjoyed her company.

When they'd finished eating. Cal sat beside Ariel on the sofa and took her hands in his. He started slightly, shocked by a feeling of familiarity as well as a surge of attraction. These probably shouldn't have come as any particular surprise. They'd slept together, so he must have touched her hands before, and he must have fancied her too.

But he'd expected his emotions to be more along the lines of worry and panic.

"About the babies," began Cal - rather clumsily, it was true, but what was the right way to begin a conversation like this?

" _Our_ babies!" said Ariel, her face filling with an emotion he couldn't identify. Anger, perhaps? Or just passion?

"Yes, that's what we need to talk about," said Cal as calmly as he could. "Obviously, Ariel, if these are my babies, it will be my duty to support you. But-"

"Of course they're your babies!" exclaimed Ariel. Her voice softened. "Please, Cal. Why can't you believe me?"

"Ariel, I accept that these babies might be mine," said Cal carefully. "And I'm flattered if you think I'd be the best choice out of all the men you've slept with."

"What do you mean: all?" gasped Ariel. "What kind of girl do you think I am? Cal, I told you. They can _only_ be yours."

"Well… you're obviously the kind of girl who has one-night stands," said Cal, a bit apologetically.

Ariel's eyes filled with tears. "No, I'm not, Cal," she said quietly. "I'm really not. I'd never done it before. I'd never thought of doing it before."A tear ran down her cheek. "All I knew was that it was… Cal, I've never even had sex on a first date before. Or even a second! I'm not sure why it was different with you. Please believe me. I'm not usually like that."

Cal wanted to believe her. He wanted to believe the wide green eyes; the desperate emotion in her voice.

But he didn't know her. He couldn't trust her; he couldn't afford to.

"Ariel, as I said, if the babies are mine, then I'll do all I can," said Cal. "In the meantime, I'm happy to support you as a friend. Even once it's been proved they're not mine, I can still support you if that's what you want. I can see you need a friend and I'm happy to be your friend."

Ariel put her head in her hands and began to sob.

"Come here, baby." Cal put his arm around her. "It's going to be okay. Whatever happens, it will be okay."

Ariel rested her head against his chest for a moment, still crying, but then she suddenly sat up, pushing his arms away. "Cal, is there no way I can make you believe me?"

"Sure," said Cal. "All we need is a paternity test and it'll all be sorted."

"Can you do them before the baby's born?"

"Not usually, but you can in exceptional circumstances," said Cal. It would be as well to get it sorted as soon as possible. The sooner Ariel accepted the truth, the better it would be for her and the babies. "We'll make an appointment today."

Ariel rested her chin in her hands. "If that's the only way…" she said, her voice heavy.

Cal rubbed her shoulder. "I'm so sorry, baby. But it has to be this way."

* * *

Ethan parked in the hospital car park and breathed deeply. He could do this. Of course he could do it. It was his job.

He peeped in the rearview mirror, hoping it wasn't quite so obvious he'd been crying, but his eyes were still red and his glasses didn't hide it. He'd have to tell everyone he had allergies. He hated the thought of telling another lie, but he didn't see what else he could do.

Ethan felt tears beginning to fill his eyes again, but he blinked them away and got out of the car. As he entered the hospital and made his way to the staff room, he answered the greetings thrown his way without looking at the speaker. If he could just get changed and get to cubicles without any of his colleagues seeing him… His patients would be able to tell he'd been crying, but he hoped they'd be too focused on their own problems to ask the doctor any nosy questions.

Now Ethan had to focus on their problems too and forget his own.

It went quite well at first. One patient asked if he was okay, but she seemed to accept it when Ethan said he had allergies. She didn't know Ethan after all: she had no reason to disbelieve him.

It only became a problem when he had to treat a pregnant lady. Her illness was unrelated to the pregnancy, but as Ethan was going to prescribe medication, he did have to ask a few questions. "When is your baby due?"

"Babies," she said with a smile. "I'm having twins. They're due next month, but they say twins often come early…"

Ethan felt a tight ball of emotion in his throat. He tried to swallow it down. "Excuse me. I need to go and see about… your medication."

He hurried out, not sure where he was going. He stumbled towards the staff room and bumped into someone. "Dr Hardy, please try to watch where you're… whatever's the matter?"

"I'm fine," said Ethan, his voice small and weak. "It's just allergies…"

Connie didn't let go of him. "I hope you don't think I'm _that_ stupid, Dr Hardy. My office. Now."

Cal parked his car untidily in his parking space, his wing-mirror bare inches from Ethan's, and hurried into the ED.

"Cal, there you are!" Noel called as he passed reception. "Mrs Beauchamp's looking for you… or she was until she hauled your brother off to her office."

"Ethan's with Mrs Beauchamp?" Cal experienced a sinking feeling. It sounded like Ethan wasn't coping nearly as well as he'd hoped and a telling-off from Mrs Beauchamp would probably break him completely.

Noel nodded. "He didn't look too good, to be honest with you."

Cal could well believe that. He took a couple of steps towards Connie's office, but he knew he couldn't barge in. He went off to get change and start work, but he resolved to keep a close eye on Connie's office and make sure he was with Ethan as soon as possible.

As he got changed, he felt the piece of paper crackle in his pocket. At Cal's insistence, Ariel had made an appointment with her obstetrician who, due to a cancellation, was able to fit her in tomorrow. Cal had promised to attend the appointment with her, but he'd tried to impress on her that she mustn't introduce him as the baby's father.

He'd decided it was most likely the father of her baby had already deserted her and now she was fixing on Cal as a substitute because he was good-looking and he had a good job.

He had to admit the idea didn't feel right. Ariel seemed like such a sweet girl: not the type to play a trick like that.

But he didn't know her, Cal reminded herself. He didn't know what she was capable of. She was certainly genuinely upset about the way Ethan had treated her, but he thought anyone would be if they were betrayed like that.

* * *

Connie walked into her office and held the door open for Ethan. "Sit down, Dr Hardy. Now, are you going to tell me what this is about?"

Ethan knew he'd cry if he tried to speak, but he also knew that not replying was not an option. He took his glasses off and put his hands over his eyes. "Just a few personal problems I shouldn't be letting get to me."

"But obviously, it is getting to you," said Connie. "Do any of your patients require immediate medical attention?"

Ethan shook his head without speaking, his tears soaking his fingers.

"Right," said Connie. She put a chair beside Ethan's and sat down. "I'm listening."


	21. Chapter 21

**Gillian Kearney Fan** , thank you for your review. I think Cal is quite good at being an idiot! But I don't think he wants to upset her. He really does believe it's impossible to be certain who the father is.

 **Tato Potato** , Cal and Ethan won't spend very much time together in this chapter, but Cal really does want to help him. Thank you for your review - I'm pleased you enjoyed the chapter.

 **Tanith Panic** , it is sad Cal can't believe Ariel. In this story, there is no Matilda (I started writing this before I knew about her), but all the early stuff with Taylor happened (after Cal slept with Ariel) and Cal is wary of trusting any woman. I like compassionate Connie too. Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. Cal is having trouble believing anything a woman says at the moment, but I thought he should recognise it as a possibility that he's the father.

* * *

"Excuse me? Are you a doctor?"

Cal turned to see a pregnant lady looking out of one of the cubicles he knew had been assigned to Ethan. "Yes, I'm Dr Knight. Is everything okay?"

The woman looked worried. "I don't know. I was being seen by Dr Hardy. He said he was going to get me some medication, but he hasn't come back. I don't want to be impatient – I know doctors are busy – but it's been a while now and I really need to go."

Cal smiled as reassuringly as he could, though inwardly he was berating himself for not insisting that Ethan stayed at home – not that there was much chance Ethan would have listened to him, but Cal should have tried harder. Ethan was in no condition to work and now he was obviously getting a severe dressing-down from Connie. "Dr Hardy has been called away to help with something, but I can sort out your medication for you."

Ethan hadn't left her file, but Cal was able to go through everything with her quite quickly. He sighed the prescription for her, gave her directions to the pharmacy and then decided he'd better check on Ethan's other patients while he was here. They were dealt with quickly and to his surprise, Cal felt almost cheerful as he returned to his own patients. There was the beginnings of a smile on his face as he opened the cubicle curtain and started to apologise for taking so long.

The apology and the smile died on his lips when he saw his patient collapsed on the floor.

* * *

"Oh, it really is nothing," said Ethan, embarrassed, as he sniffed hard and wiped his hands across his face. "I'm so sorry, Mrs Beauchamp."

"I'll be the judge of that." Connie went to her desk drawer, took out a box of tissues and put them on the desk beside Ethan. He thanked her shakily and took one. Connie sat back down and looked pointedly at her watch. "I'm still waiting, Dr Hardy."

Ethan took an unsteady breath. "I lied to my girlfriend and now she won't speak to me," he said, painfully aware of how pathetic it sounded.

"Considering how distressed you are, I think it's a lot more than that," said Connie, her voice softer now. "Why don't you tell me from the beginning, Ethan? And just so you know, that's not a suggestion."

Ethan didn't want to tell her the whole story. The secret was really Cal's, not his, and he knew Cal wouldn't want anyone to know about it. But he realised he had no choice and told the story as quickly and clearly as he could. Connie interrupted occasionally to ask questions, but mostly, she let Ethan speak.

"Yes, it does sound like you've got yourself into a bit of a mess," said Connie, when he'd finished. "It's always better to be honest, Ethan. However good your intentions in telling the lie, if the truth comes out later, it never looks good. Even if you hadn't become friends with Ariel, she could easily have found out the truth."

Ethan wiped his eyes and wished he had the nerve to ask Connie what he should do.

"But don't give up on her," said Connie. "I'm sure she hasn't really given up on you. She's had a terrible shock, which was partly your fault, but it sounds like Ariel really needs a friend – and I'm not sure how much of a friend Cal is going to be if he won't accept her word about the babies."

Ethan nodded. He knew it wouldn't be easy being Ariel's friend when his feelings were so strong, but he cared about her and would have to put her needs first.

"Right: so all I need to know now is whether you're fit to go back to work," said Connie. She looked at him appraisingly. "You do look a bit better now, though I recommend washing your face first, but if you're not fully focused, you'd better go home."

"No, I'm fine. I can go back to work," said Ethan quickly. He still felt a bit wobbly, but he knew his patients needed him and he thought he could probably cope. He felt guilty enough for deserting them for this long.

"Excellent," said Connie crisply. She stood up, and Ethan knew he was dismissed, but at that moment came a frenzied knocking at the door and Connie called for them to come in.

Ethan turned away, running his hands quickly over his face and hoped he didn't look too awful.

"What is it, Lofty?" said Connie.

"I'm sorry, Mrs Beauchamp, but one of Cal's patients has collapsed. He's moved him to Resus, but he can't work out what's wrong and his stats are dropping."

"Thank you, Lofty," said Connie. "I'm just coming."

"Is there anything I can do to help?" said Ethan anxiously. He felt none of his usual annoyance on discovering Cal had got himself into another mess. It wasn't surprising Cal was distracted at the moment – and it was all Ethan's fault.

Connie nodded. "Yes – please go and take care of your own patients and don't worry about anyone else's."

It could have been a rebuke. On another day, it probably would have been. Today, Ethan gave her a grateful smile and went to wash his face.

* * *

Cal was exhausted. All he wanted was to go home and be alone for a bit, but he couldn't. He'd promised Ariel he'd go and see her after work, to see if there was anything he could do and to arrange what time he would pick her up and take her to the obstetrician's appointment. Cal knew Ariel probably wouldn't need him to stay for long as he'd already seen her once today, but the last thing he needed now was to be strong for Ariel when he was feeling so weak himself.

The patient Cal had moved to Resus had died. Connie had done everything she could, but in the end, she'd had to accept it was over. She'd said it wasn't Cal's fault and most doctors would have missed it, but that didn't reassure Cal. 'Most doctors' wasn't the same as 'all doctors' and Cal couldn't help thinking that if he hadn't been so distracted, he might have been able to spot it.

He'd done his best to focus throughout the rest of the day, not wanting his inattention to lead to any more deaths or suffering, but it was difficult. Much as he wanted to help Ariel, it bothered him that she could be so insistent that the babies were his when she couldn't possibly know.

Of course, if he really had been the only man she'd slept with in that time, then obviously he had to be the father, but if Ariel wasn't the type to have one-night stands, he didn't see why she would make an exception for him.

At one time, it would have made perfect sense as he'd considered himself irresistible enough to break down any woman's insecurities, but he didn't think that now. He might be of above average intelligence, though he was convinced he was well below the average in comparison with other doctors, and he didn't think he was that bad-looking, but he knew he was nothing special. He had none of Ethan's sweetness and although Ethan's jokes were pretty awful, they were still funnier than Cal's. And as for his conversational skills… Cal didn't think he'd be able to look at a barstool ever again without cringing, which was a problem considering he spent so much time in bars.

He went to the staff room to get changed, only to find Ethan there before him. He looked nearly as tired as Cal was feeling. "Hey, Nibbles, you okay?" asked Cal softly.

"Yes," whispered Ethan, without looking at Cal.

Cal knew he was lying and he really wished he could go home with Ethan now. They'd both had a horrible day and it might help them both if they talked about it, but Cal couldn't break his promise to Ariel.

"Are you okay?" said Ethan, blinking hard as he turned to his brother. "I heard about the patient, but I didn't hear what happened."

"The patient was fine," said Cal. He didn't want to give Ethan any more to worry about when he was already so upset and besides, all Cal's other patients had been fine, at least in the sense that they were still alive.

The relieved look on Ethan's face touched Cal almost as much as it made him feel guilty. He told himself that lying about a patient wasn't on the same level as lying about your brother, but he had to admit he wasn't sure about that.

"I'm glad," said Ethan. The corners of his mouth lifted slightly. It wasn't quite a smile, but Cal knew Ethan meant what he said.

He touched Ethan's arm. "I've got to go. I'll see you later, okay?"

Ethan actually looked disappointed. "You're not coming home?"

"Not yet," said Cal. "I've got to do a few things. But I'll be back for dinner. Why don't you order us a takeaway?"

"It's my turn to cook," pointed out Ethan, though he often cooked even when it wasn't his turn.

Cal patted his arm. "It's been a tough day, Nibbles. For both of us. I think we should let someone else do the cooking. I'll see you at home."

"See you later," said Ethan. "I… um… I hope whatever you're doing goes well."

To Cal's surprise, it seemed as though Ethan wanted his company as much as he wanted Ethan's.


	22. Chapter 22

**ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. They do need each other, but it's about time Cal started keeping his promises to Ariel. That's a good point about Ethan not needing to be at the top of his game - I didn't think of that.

 **Bonnie Sveen Fan** , thank you for your review. Cal seems to have calmed down a bit now, which is lucky because Ethan really needs him.

 **CBloom2** , I love it when they want each other's company too! I'm trying to write the scene when they are finally together and it's very difficult, but I hope I can sort it out. Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , I love it when they bond. My favourite thing about writing arguments is the bit when they forgive each other! Thank you for your review. I'm glad you like the way I'm handling the theme - I do feel like I'm groping around in the dark with this story. But there are worse things than groping Cal and Ethan in the dark.

 **Tato Potato** , thank you for your review. Most of my stories do have happy endings (eventually), so it's certainly possible everything will work out!

* * *

Ariel opened the door and stared at Cal. Her eyes were wide and worried. She half-held out a hand towards him, but then she seemed to think better of it. "Cal, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," said Cal, but the concern in her voice brought all his emotions to the surface. He swallowed hard and blinked rapidly. He would not cry in front of Ariel. He was here to look after _her_.

Ariel's hand wavered again, but this time she reached out and took Cal's hand in her own. He was at once hit with the warmth and familiarity of it and he looked at her, shocked, momentarily almost forgetting the sadness and guilt.

"Has it been a difficult day?" said Ariel gently, and Cal found himself nodding. Ariel looked at him sympathetically. "Come on, Cal. Come and sit down."

He went with her unquestioningly and sat on the sofa. He felt his body sinking into it and knew immediately that he'd sat here before.

"I'm sorry: it's still not very comfortable," said Ariel nervously.

Cal smiled a bit guiltily, realising that he must have criticised the sofa at one point. He felt the urge to tell her he hadn't meant it, but he couldn't be sure what he'd meant when he couldn't remember.

"Shall I make coffee?" said Ariel.

Cal nodded. He didn't want her to work too hard, but he knew he could do with a couple of minutes to get his emotions completely under control. He sat with his eyes closed and breathed deeply, trying not to think too much – about the events of today or about the little he could remember of his night with Ariel.

When he opened his eyes and looked around the flat, he was hit with several more flashes of memory. The small table he didn't recognise (it was too small for what Cal usually did on tables, so he probably hadn't taken too much notice of it), but he recognised the ugly curtains and felt certain they were rough to the touch.

When Ariel returned with the coffee, he smiled as he thanked her and took a sip. "Just how I like it."

Ariel nodded, blushing slightly, and looked down at the moth-eaten-looking carpet. Cal realised she must have made him coffee before.

"Sit down," he said, wanting to put her at her ease. It bothered her to see him hovering anxiously around her own living room.

He patted the sofa cushion beside him. Ariel's eyes went to the cushion, then to Cal's face, before veering away again. She sat in a cheap-looking armchair opposite him and didn't meet his eye.

"Nice coffee," said Cal, to fill the silence.

Finally, Ariel looked at him. "Cal, I don't want to be nosy. I know it's none of my business. But I can see something's wrong."

Cal heard the compassion in her voice; heard it waver slightly as she spoke. He stared at her, amazed she could care so much about him. "I just had a bad day at work."

As soon as he'd said it, he knew he'd had a bad day at work on the day he'd met her too.

"Would you like to tell me about it?" said Ariel. "I really don't mind if you do and I… I'd like to help. You've been so kind to me."

Cal felt an ache in his chest. He knew he hadn't always been kind to her. Earlier today, he'd thought she accepted his help only because it was a choice between him and Ethan, and for once, Cal was the better-behaved. He knew she felt gratitude towards him but doubted she actually liked him.

But now, as he looked into her bright green eyes, he realised she wasn't just being polite. She really did care about him.

In a way, that worried him. Ariel believed Cal was the father of her babies and it was possible she'd managed to convince herself of far more than Cal had meant to convey.

But at the same time, he felt grateful and humble that she would show him such kindness. He didn't know exactly how their night together had ended, but they usually ended with a promise to call the girl – a promise Cal very rarely kept and definitely hadn't in this case. How could he, when she'd been just another name in his contacts that meant nothing to him?

"Cal?" said Ariel softly. She leaned forward slightly in her chair, only to stop and smile slightly as she realised her bump made this difficult. She got up from her chair and sat beside him. "What happened, Cal? You can tell me."

Tears came to Cal's eyes. "I lost a patient. It was difficult, but it happens sometimes. It's something we try to get used to, but it isn't always possible." His voice trembled through the last few words and he had to wipe away an escaping tear.

Ariel slipped her hand into his. "I'm sorry, Cal."

Cal wiped his other eye as the emotions rose up inside him. His throat ached with the effort of not sobbing and all he wanted was to tell her everything. "I left him," he said. "I left the patient. Someone told me that E… that one of my colleagues had been called in to see our clinical lead. I knew he might be there for some time so I decided to help him out by seeing some of his patients."

Ariel squeezed his hand as Cal brushed his finger under his eye again.

"Sorry about this," said Cal unsteadily.

"It's all right," said Ariel. "It's okay to have emotions, Cal, and your job must be very sad sometimes. It was kind of you to help your colleague."

Cal tried to take a calming breath. "I discharged all his patients and then I went back to my own. And one of them was lying on the floor. He was unconscious. I called for help and got him into Resus, but I couldn't work out what was wrong. Our clinical lead came to help and she figured it out, but it was too late by then."

He put his hand over his face, trying to suppress a sob, but then he felt Ariel moving closer to him. She lifted her arm from her side and put it around him, moving her hand up and down his back.

"Cal, I'm so sorry," said Ariel. She sounded genuinely sad.

Cal's emotions engulfed him like a tidal wave. "Everything seems to be going wrong now, Ariel. Everything. I don't know why, but I can't do anything anymore. I can't help my patients. I can't do the paperwork without making stupid, basic mistakes. I can't even go out for a drink without sounding like a complete idiot. I'm being an idiot now. What's wrong with me?"

"Nothing's wrong with you," said Ariel. "You're not very happy at the moment – I'm sure that happens a lot in your job because of all the stress, and the sadness of losing a patient. Maybe you need to take a break or talk to someone who really understands."

"I just feel like something's missing," Cal said into his hands. "My life is just wrong and I don't know how to fix it."

"I'm sure you can fix it," said Ariel. "I'm not saying it will be easy, but I'm sure there are people who can help. You've got your colleagues: I'm sure a lot of them have had the same feelings as you have. And you can always talk to me."

Cal wiped his eyes. "Why would you want me to talk to you after what I did to you?"

"It's not the worst thing that's ever been done to me," said Ariel. "Though I do wish you'd… no, let's not go into that now."

Cal could guess what she meant. "If the babies are mine, Ariel, I will take full responsibility."

"They are yours," said Ariel. She looked upset. "I promise you, Cal. They're yours. I would never lie to you about something like that. I wouldn't lie to you at all."

"And I don't want to think you're lying to me now," sniffed Cal. "But I've been lied to a lot. My last girlfriend told me all kinds of lies. I just can't trust anyone now. I would like to trust you, but I can't."


	23. Chapter 23

**Tanith Panic** , thank you for your review. It is a shame Cal can't trust Ariel - but maybe things will change. At least he's talking to Ariel and helping her so he has moved quite a long way since the confrontation between them that morning.

 **CBloom2** , I think you're right - Cal is completely lost without Ethan to steady him. And that includes when he makes the decision to shut Ethan out or if he feels unable to confide in him. Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , I think it is helping Cal to have a bit of comfort and it's probably a good thing he and Ariel are bonding, but it must feel really strange at the same time! Thank you for your review.

* * *

Ariel's face softened. "No, it's okay. You're right. You can't just take my word for something as important as this when you don't know me," she said. "It's not your fault you can't remember. But paternity tests are pretty easy to do, aren't they? And they don't usually make mistakes?"

"Not usually," said Cal, grateful to have a technical, work-related question to distract him from his feelings. "There are things that could go wrong. Most of them down to human error. Test results can be mixed up – and like most things, it's possible to mess up by not following the procedure correctly or allowing the sample to get contaminated. There are also other things that can affect the result. But it's unusual. But if you wanted, if it came out negative, we could do the test again."

Ariel looked at him curiously. "What other things can affect the result?" She looked suddenly guilty. "I'm sorry: I'm not asking so I can have an excuse ready if it comes out negative. I was just… being nosy, I suppose. I thought these tests were supposed to be scientific."

Cal smiled. It actually hadn't crossed his mind than she'd asked out of anything other than genuine interest. There was an almost childlike spark of delight in her eyes which he was sure he'd seen before and he wondered if that was what had first attracted him to her. She did have beautiful eyes and when they were all lit up like that… _focus, Caleb_. "One problem is that siblings have very similar DNA. If I was the father and Ethan took the test, Ethan could get a positive test result, just because he's my brother."

He wished he hadn't mentioned Ethan when he saw her flinch slightly. "I didn't sleep with Ethan. I didn't even meet Ethan till I was already pregnant!"

"No, I know: that was just an example," said Cal quickly. "I'm sorry."

Ariel relaxed. "No, _I'm_ sorry, Cal. I shouldn't be so touchy."

Cal smiled and touched her hand. "You're pregnant. You're supposed to be over-emotional. Don't worry: I'm used to it. Um, I mean I'm used to over-emotional pregnant women I treat in the ED. I don't mean…"

"I know," said Ariel. She rested her hand on his. "Don't worry. Please could you tell me some more? I don't know why and I know I probably won't understand properly, but it's just really interesting."

Cal nodded. If they both kept apologising for everything they said, their conversations would never get anywhere. "There are other things that could theoretically go wrong, but it would only happen very, very rarely," he said. "I've never heard of it happening. Even the possibilities I've already told you about are rare. But sometimes DNA can change or mutate, so it's possible that a man will appear not to be the father when actually he is. Also, very rarely, a woman might become pregnant with non-identical twins, and at a very early stage, the twins could fuse together and become one baby. Half of this baby's DNA would come from one twin and half from the other. For the most part, this wouldn't matter because the twins would have been siblings, and siblings have very similar DNA anyway. But brothers don't always show up as the same person so it is just about possible that the DNA cells that are tested would come from one twin and the baby's cells would come from the other twin, which gives a very small chance of a mismatch."

"So can you get babies who are half-male, half-female?"

"Oh, yes," said Cal. "But you wouldn't usually know unless you have DNA testing. Sometimes the genitals might show the person hasn't developed in a completely conventional way, but mostly, you'd have no idea. It tends to be much more obvious in animals where males and females have distinct markings. They'll look like a male on one side and a female on the other. Actually, they say that one in eight single human babies was conceived as twins."

Ariel was staring at him, a rapt look on her face. "You're so clever, Cal! How do you know all this stuff? I mean, I know you're a doctor, but you work in emergency medicine."

With a pang of guilt, Cal decided not to tell her that Ethan had told him on one of the rare occasions when Cal had been listening. "My degree was in medicine, not emergency medicine, so I learned about lots of different medical branches, and I need the knowledge too as we have to diagnose - or at least recognise the possibility of - all kinds of different conditions." He smiled. "I'm most definitely not an obstetrician and there's a lot I can't do and don't know, but with the right equipment, I can give a pregnancy test; monitor the baby if there's cause for concern; set up an ultrasound scan; deliver the baby; treat the baby either before or after birth… but there's a lot I can't do, and a lot I wouldn't do - even though I technically could - because it's not part of my job."

"Could you do the paternity test?" said Ariel.

"Not in this case," admitted Cal. "It is a bit different when you do the test before the baby's born. Though even after the baby's born, although I could physically do the test, it would raise questions if anyone noticed that a doctor from the ED had ordered a paternity test." He smiled. "But Holby City is a good hospital, Ariel. We have some of the top doctors in the country... though I'm not necessarily including myself in that I know your obstetrician will do her best for you."

* * *

Ethan lay curled up on the sofa and tried to convince himself he wasn't going to cry. He'd done too much of that today already. He still couldn't quite believe he'd cried in Connie's office, though he had to admit there were worse places and she had been very kind.

She'd been kind all day. She'd checked up on him regularly, though often unobtrusively, just catching his eye as she passed him. It might have worried him, knowing that Connie was constantly assessing him, but he couldn't forget how kind she'd been. A couple of times, she'd touched his arm lightly and quietly told him to take a break soon.

She'd stopped him again on his way out, calling him into her office for a chat. Ethan had been terrified, his nerves stretched to breaking point, but all she'd wanted was to tell him he'd done well and she'd see him tomorrow if he felt he could manage it.

Ethan had only just managed not to embarrass himself in her office all over again.

But it wasn't Connie who was on his mind as he lay on the sofa, blinking hard and telling himself to calm down.

He closed his eyes and remembered Ariel's kisses. Her sweet lips pressed against his. Her arms around him, holding him tightly as though he was someone worth holding on to. His arms around her: the feeling that she fitted perfectly into his arms. The way she'd looked at him, as though he was someone incredible.

The way she'd looked at him this morning, although he was something she'd found on the bottom of her shoe.

Ethan felt his breath hitching as his eyes stung. _Stop it, Ethan!_ he told himself as he took his glasses off and rubbed at his eyes. _Stop being so self-indulgent and grow up, for goodness' sake!_

He remembered how she'd looked at him when she'd asked him for help. He would normally have thought twice about any deception, but he'd found himself swept along. It was partly that he felt responsible for what his brother had done, but he thought he'd been falling in love with her, even then.

In love? Was he really in love?

Ethan was still wondering when he heard Cal unlocking the door. He sat up, rubbed his eyes and returned his glasses to his face. He was fine, he told himself. Completely fine.

"Nibbles?" said Cal.

"Over here, Cal," called Ethan with a catch in his voice.

He heard Cal's quick footsteps and then his brother was beside him. "Are you okay?" he asked Ethan gently.

Ethan started to nod his head, but his eyes flooded with tears again. He looked away, but he knew Cal had seen.

"Hey!" said Cal softly. "Nibbles."

"I'm sorry," said Ethan miserably.

Cal hesitated, then slipped his arm around Ethan. "Shh. Don't be sorry."

Ethan tensed, then he realised that for once, he needed physical closeness. He felt a tear tracking down his cheek, then another.

"You really care about her, don't you?" said Cal.

Ethan sniffed, considered denying it, and finally nodded.

"She's a nice girl," said Cal. "You'd be good together."

"If she ever speaks to me again!" said Ethan.

Cal stroked Ethan's back. "I'll talk to her, okay?"

"I was trying to help her," said Ethan, only just managing not to sob. "I wasn't trying to… you know."

"Yeah, I know," said Cal. "I shouldn't have said that. I was just… I didn't know what to do. She was saying I was the father of her babies; I could barely remember her and... I was terrified, Ethan!"

"Of course you were," said Ethan gently.


	24. Chapter 24

**Bonnie Sveen Fan** , thank you for your review - I'm glad you enjoyed it.

 **Tanith Panic** , Ariel might confront Ethan at some point, but although their last meeting was weeks ago for us, it was only this morning for Ariel! So she needs more time. I'm glad you like Cal and Connie. Thank you for your review.

 **Tato Potato** , thank you for your review. I love the way Ethan always wants to do what it is best for everyone and usually he's very good at it! But this time, it's gone badly wrong.

 **ETWentHome** , I don't think Ariel does want to be in the same room as Ethan at the moment! But she will talk to him eventually. Cal will see to that. Thank you for your review.

 _Thank you to **hopeyx** for the follow and favourite._

* * *

"If I'd just found out I was going to be a dad," said Ethan, "I'd be scared too."

" _Might_ be going to be a dad," Cal corrected him.

It was almost a relief when Ethan looked angry. It was better than tears. "Why can't you just believe her, Caleb?"

Cal sighed. "I want to. But… I don't know if I can ever trust a woman again."

The anger on Ethan's face melted away. "Oh, Cal… I'm sorry. I didn't think. It's understandable after what happened to you. It must be very difficult for you to trust anyone."

Cal nodded.

"But you've got to learn to trust people," said Ethan, starting to look emotional again. "Or you'll never be happy."

"I don't know if I can," said Cal softly.

Ethan put his hand on Cal's shoulder. "I'm sure you can. I believe in you. Most women – most people - would never dream of doing what Taylor did. I'm sure Ariel wouldn't. Please try to trust her."

"I'll try," said Cal. "I am trying. It's just… difficult."

Ethan nodded. "I know." He patted Cal's shoulder. "I know I'm pretty useless at the moment, but I'll help all I can. How is she?"

Cal was instantly filled with reservations. "Are you sure you want to know?"

"I know she's probably upset," said Ethan, a slight tremor in his voice. "I know it's my fault if she is. But I would like to know."

"It's not your fault," said Cal. "We all made mistakes."

Ethan said nothing, and Cal had the impression he was fighting for control.

"She was upset this morning, but she had things to focus on," said Cal. "We went to the locksmith, then we went shopping."

He couldn't quite interpret the look on Ethan's face. It might have been partly jealousy, but he looked hurt too.

"Ethan, she's pregnant," said Cal gently. "Whoever the father is, I couldn't let her shop on her own. Especially not when she's upset."

Ethan nodded miserably. "I know. I'm glad you went with her."

Cal decided he'd better change the subject. "Did you order the pizza?"

"No. Sorry." Ethan swallowed audibly. "I… didn't know what time you were coming home."

Cal suspected the real reason was because Ethan was too upset. He decided to let it go. "Of course you didn't… how could you when I didn't tell you where I was going?" Cal picked up his phone. "I'll do it now."

Ethan couldn't manage more than a whisper. "I don't think I'm very hungry, Cal."

"I know you're not," said Cal sympathetically. "When I'm down, I don't want to eat either. But you know it'll be worse if you don't eat."

"Is that possible?" asked Ethan, with a painful laugh. A tear escaped and he brushed it quickly away.

"I'd rather not take the risk of finding out, Nibbles." Cal put his arm tightly around Ethan. "It's bad enough seeing you this unhappy."

Ethan seemed to realise he was leaning against Cal. He tried to sit up, but Cal wouldn't let him. Ethan struggled, then relaxed against his brother. "So, um, how are you?"

Cal looked at him for a moment, weighing something up in his mind.

"It must have been a shock finding out about the patient," said Ethan.

"Yeah, it was," said Cal.

Ethan tried to smile. "But at least she was okay."

Cal looked away, biting his lip; wishing he hadn't lied to Ethan.

"Cal?" Ethan's voice shook. "She was okay, wasn't she?"

Cal shook his head. He didn't want to upset Ethan any further, but what kind of example would he be setting to Ethan if he lied?

Ethan looked as though he were pain. "Why did you lie to me? So I knew how it felt?"

"What?" Cal stared at him in shock. "No!" He turned Ethan's face towards him. "No, Ethan. I would never do that."

"Then why?" said Ethan, his eyes filling with tears.

"Because I thought you had enough to be sad about," said Cal.

"But I'd have supported you!" said Ethan, distraught.

"I know," said Cal. "And you'd have done a good job of it. These last few days… I couldn't have managed without you."

"Then…"

Cal looked at him closely. He really didn't think it would help Ethan if he explained he'd neglected his own patients because he was also treating Ethan's.

"No, Cal! Just tell me," said Ethan. "I know I made some bad decisions. I shouldn't have brought Ariel into the flat. I shouldn't have pretended you weren't my brother. I shouldn't have done lots of things. But I wasn't trying to deceive anyone. I just… I felt like I was responsible for Ariel. I wanted to help. But my feelings got involved and it was harder and harder to tell her the truth."

Cal nodded. "I get that."

"So can't you be honest with me now?" pleaded Ethan. "Can't you tell me why you didn't tell me?"

Cal began to feel panicky. "I don't have to tell you everything I do."

"Fine!" Ethan tried to stand up, but Cal held him too tightly.

"Ethan, you're taking this too personally," said Cal desperately. "Okay, I won't lie to you. There is a reason I haven't told you. But I don't think there's anything to gain from telling you. So I'd really rather not."

Ethan held his hands to his head. "I'm confused now. And a bit scared."

"I know. It is confusing," said Cal. "But you know what you were saying about learning to trust people? Please trust me. Don't ask me anymore."

Ethan looked at him again. He released his breath in a slow sigh. "Okay. I'll trust you."

* * *

To Cal's relief, Ethan looked a lot better once they'd had the pizza – and Ethan managed to eat nearly half of it. They spent the meal trying to talk about neutral things that wouldn't cause arguments or upset them, but once they'd finished, Cal decided there was something he did have to tell Ethan. It might upset him, but he thought Ethan would be glad to know Cal was taking responsibility for once.

"Ethan, I need to tell you something," said Cal.

Ethan tensed, but managed to speak calmly. "Okay."

Cal took a deep breath and came straight out with it. "I'm taking Ariel to see her obstetrician tomorrow."

Something flickered in Ethan's eyes, but there were no tears. "That's… good," said Ethan.

"We're going to ask for a paternity test," said Cal. "If they're mine, I'll support her. If they're not mine… well, I'll probably still give her some support because she hasn't got anyone else and I'm hoping she will be family some day."

Ethan looked startled. "A paternity test?"

"Well, how else are we going to know who the father is?" said Cal, trying not to be aggrieved that Ethan had missed everything he'd said about supporting Ariel. He finally decided to do the right thing and Ethan wasn't even listening!

"Firstly, we do know because Ariel's told us," said Ethan. "And secondly, you must know… I mean, of course you know… it's very unlikely they'll agree to a paternity test before the babies are born."

Cal had considered this small difficulty – and discarded it. "I'm sure once I explain-"

"Well, I'm _not_ sure," said Ethan. "I'm sorry, but I'm not sure at all. I know I'm in no position to criticise you for being economical with the truth, Caleb, but… well, you know about the risk. And that's even assuming there's anything they can do at this late stage. It's much too late for an amniocentesis and I imagine it's also too late for a chorionic villus sampling. I know there are non-invasive techniques now, but they're new and tend only to be offered privately - and at significant expense."

"We might do them," said Cal.

"We might, but it's not that likely," said Ethan. "You need to tell Ariel the truth, Cal. She's probably got her hopes up now that you'll know who the father is by tomorrow and that's just not realistic. Why not just wait till the babies are born? It's only a couple of months."

Ethan had no idea how long a couple of months could be. The last couple of months for Cal - and the couple of months before that; every couple of months since Taylor - had dragged past, dragging Cal along with them. His feelings had changed so little in that time, it seemed almost as though only a matter of days had passed, but it had felt more like an eternity.

"I've told her she won't get the results straight away," he said, a bit defiantly.

"Cal, you need to tell her _everything_ ," said Ethan. "If she hears about it for the first time in the appointment, it's going to be a really big shock."

Cal shrugged. "Most people find out for the first time in the appointment."

"Yes, but most people don't have a… a friend who's a doctor and could have told them in advance," said Ethan. His voice wavered. "And… and it's not just that."

"What else is it?" said Cal impatiently.

Ethan swallowed. "I really want Ariel to trust you. She did trust me, but I messed up and she was just so lucky you were there to pick up the pieces."

Cal patted his shoulder. "I ought to know how to do that. I've watched you doing it for me enough times."

"No, Caleb, this is serious," said Ethan earnestly. "You're all she's got. The only person she can trust. Please, Cal. Don't give her any reason to think she can't trust you either. I don't know how she'd cope if she lost you too."


	25. Chapter 25

**Bonnie Sveen Fan** , if Cal listened to Ethan more often, he would probably find himself in a lot fewer messes! Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , I never know what timeline I'm in or even which universe half the time! I like a bit of forceful Ethan too. Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. Ethan usually is right! Ariel just needs Cal to do the right thing... first time for everything, I suppose!

* * *

Ariel opened the door and smiled shakily at Cal. "Hi."

"Hey, little mermaid," said Cal without thinking.

Ariel laughed. "I told you not to call me that! But like that would ever stop you."

Cal stared at her. "I didn't know I'd called you that before."

"Not… recently," said Ariel, and took what was probably an involuntary step backwards.

 _In bed then_ , thought Cal.

Or if not in bed, at least in that part of his life he didn't remember when they had been to bed.

He wished he could remember. He didn't know why, but he had the feeling it had been good.

If the situation were different, he might have asked Ariel for a repeat performance…. But she was Ethan's now. Or she would be once they'd sorted everything out.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I wasn't thinking," said Ariel.

"No, it's okay," said Cal quickly. "It's not your fault I drank too much and can't remember." He sighed. "I only wish I did."

"But you can't," said Ariel. "And there's not much we can do about that, so please don't worry." She smiled hesitantly. "It might be less awkward this way?"

Cal laughed unsteadily. "Yeah, at least you know I'm not standing here thinking about it."

"Yes, that's true!" said Ariel. "That really would make things awkward. And just to reassure you, I'm not thinking about it either. Not at all. Um, w-would you like to come in? I'm nearly ready."

Cal saw her nervousness; heard her desperate and not quite successful attempts to hide it. He knew it wasn't entirely due to what he'd just called her. He sympathised and didn't blame her at all. Nerves were natural in this situation.

At least, Cal hoped so. He had a whole swarm of butterflies in his stomach.

He might be going to be a dad…

As he sat and waited for Ariel, he allowed himself to imagine it for a moment. Two tiny babies in his arms, looking up at him trustingly. Lovingly.

Cal's terror mounted. He'd always known this was something that could happen, but he'd convinced himself it was impossible because he always used precautions and most women who had one-night stands were on the pill anyway. It was only sensible. Ariel probably hadn't been, but it wasn't Cal's fault. He'd used precautions. Not that he could remember, but he always did.

They probably weren't his babies.

But if they were…

"Cal?" said Ariel. "Are you okay?"

She was looking at him with a worried expression on her face.

"Are you nervous?" she asked. She came towards him. "I'm sure it'll be okay."

"But if they're my babies…" said Cal.

"Then I'm sure we'll cope," said Ariel. "I mean, if you want to help me."

"Of course I want to, if they're mine," said Cal.

He'd thought that might make her happy, but there was sadness in her eyes. "We'll know soon."

Cal felt the stirrings of guilt. "Actually, Ariel, we need to…"

He'd spoken too softly. Her voice cut easily across his. "We'd better be going, Cal. I'm sorry: did you say something?"

"No," said Cal. "Just that we need to be going."

He could tell her in the car.

* * *

He didn't tell her in the car.

They didn't say very much at all in the car. Ariel seemed sunk in her own thoughts and although Cal tried telling her a couple of times that everything would be okay, he wasn't even sure if she'd heard.

It wasn't until they were sitting in the waiting room that she asked: "Will it hurt, Cal?"

"Will what hurt?" he said, guiltily aware he'd zoned out. He shouldn't have done that. His job was to reassure her.

"The paternity test," said Ariel. "I imagine they can be quite invasive when the baby's… still inside."

Cal knew he had to tell her now. Ethan's words were echoing in his mind. She so badly needed someone she could trust. "There are actually quite a few ways of doing it. Some are invasive; some aren't. But I'm afraid-"

"Hi, Ariel," said a warm voice. "Would you like to come in?"

Ariel got to her feet. With surprising nervousness, Cal did the same.

"This is Cal," said Ariel.

The doctor nodded and Cal had the uncomfortable impression that his name wasn't unfamiliar. "I'm Dr Barry, but most people call me Toni. It's nice to meet you, Cal. You're more than welcome to come to Ariel's appointment if she'd like that."

Ariel confirmed that she did want Cal there and they all went into the doctor's room. Toni started off by asking how Ariel was and giving her a quick examination, during which Cal determinedly looked the other way. Then they chatted about more general stuff like how Ariel was coping and the support she'd had. She mentioned that Cal had been supporting her for the last couple of days.

"And what about the doctor you mentioned who gave you his number?" said Toni. "Ethan?"

"He's out of the picture," said Ariel.

"Has something happened, Ariel?"

"Nothing happened," said Ariel. "He's nothing. He's just a doctor who was kind to me once."

 _A bit more than that,_ thought Cal. _He's the doctor who was kind to you more than once; the doctor who brought you back to me… no! Not the doctor who brought you back to me. I'm the doctor who's taking you back to him._

"If you want to talk about Ethan, I can leave the room if you like," offered Cal.

Ariel shook her head firmly but gave him a small smile. "Thanks, Cal. But I don't want to talk about Ethan. I want to talk about paternity tests."

Toni was too professional to show surprise in an obvious way, but Cal, even without knowing her, recognised the signs.

"Cal wants to be sure," said Ariel. "I can understand that. I am sure and there's no need for the test, but Cal doesn't really know me so why should he take my word for it?"

Cal wanted to take her hand and squeeze it tightly and tell her he did take her word for it, but he couldn't. He'd been lied to before. Deceived before. By someone who seemed just as genuine and convincing as Ariel. He couldn't take any chances again.

It was horrible being lied and deceived. He didn't want to feel that way again.

 _But that was what he was doing._

He hadn't told any lies, but he'd hidden something from her and what was that if not deception?

"I can understand why you might think that way, Cal," said Toni.

"No!" said Cal suddenly. He couldn't do this. "I'm sorry. I'm really sorry."

Ariel looked concerned. And scared. "Cal, what's wrong?"

"There's something I haven't told you," he said. "I should have done, but I bottled out again and again, and I'm so sorry."

Ariel's eyes widened. She looked at Cal in confusion. "Cal, what do you mean?"

"I have to tell you something," said Cal.

"You can have a few minutes in my office if you'd like," said Toni.

"No, please stay," said Cal. "If Ariel doesn't mind. You'll know... if I'm right. I might not be right. I hope I'm wrong. But I've still got to tell you."

"What is it?" said Ariel. She looked frightened now.

Cal put his head in his hands. "It's about the paternity test. You can't have it till after the baby's born."

"What?" Ariel whispered the word.

"Prenatal paternity tests can be done, but not at this late stage in the pregnancy," said Cal. "I suppose I must have known that really. I don't know if I forgot or if I just wanted to. But I shouldn't have misled you or let you get your hopes up."

"But you knew?" said Ariel in a small voice.

Cal hung his head. "I was almost sure. I knew there were new, non-invasive ways of testing. But I didn't know if they'd be available at this stage in your pregnancy. I just hoped. I wanted you to have what you wanted. I didn't say anything because I was hoping it would work out." His voice shook. "The trouble with me, Ariel, is that I'm a coward. I put things off in the hope they'll turn out right. That you'll change your mind. That I'll suddenly remember everything and feel able to trust you and the test wouldn't be needed."

"Or that I'll admit there are a million other guys who could be the father?" said Ariel. "Because that's the kind of girl I am?"

"No!" said Cal, quite horrified by the thought. "Don't talk about yourself like that. Of course there wouldn't be a million. Maybe one or possibly two…"

Ariel burst into tears. "There's none, Cal! There was only you."

"Cal, I think perhaps you should leave now?" said Toni. "I'm glad you've been honest and I'm afraid you are right. We can't give the babies a paternity test at this stage. The risk is far too great. But I think Ariel needs some time to think about what you've told her."

Cal half-stood up, but then he looked at Ariel and he couldn't leave her. He sat down again and put his arms around her, holding her tightly against him. "I'm sorry, baby. I'm so sorry I didn't tell you. I messed up again. I always do. I'm just a waste of space and I know it."

Ariel struggled at first, but half-heartedly. If it had been anything more than that, Cal would have let her go. He was thinking about it anyway. But then she stopped struggling and put her arms around him.

Cal felt himself tremble.

He'd done this before.

He'd put his arm around her a few times recently and she'd put her arms around him, but they hadn't held each other this tightly. Not with this much bodily contact. But he had held her like this before.

He'd held her in his arms and she'd held him and he'd felt just like this. As though he couldn't quite breathe and his pulse was through the roof and he felt terrified of what was coming – but at the same time, completely and utterly safe and he didn't ever want to let go.

 _But she's Ethan's_ , Cal told himself.

But he still didn't let go and neither did she.

"Oh, Cal, why can't you believe me?" sobbed Ariel. "Why can't you believe there was only you?"

"Because if you're not that kind of girl, I don't see why you'd make an exception for me," admitted Cal. "I'm nothing. I'm really nothing."

Ariel gasped and held him more tightly. "Is that really why?"

"Of course it's why," said Cal. "You don't give the impression of being that kind of girl. But there was no other explanation."

"Because you're special!" cried Ariel. "Can't you see it, Cal? Can you really not see it?"

"Um… no," said Cal, still holding her. "Not really. But… thanks."

Ariel sniffed. "You said… you said I was special too. That night."

Cal said nothing for a moment or two. He said that to a lot of girls. But sometimes it was true. "Well, you are."


	26. Chapter 26

**Tato Potato** , thank you for your review. It would be definitely awkward if the mother of Cal's twins refused to talk to his brother! They really do have a lot to discuss.

 **Tanith Panic** , I think Ethan is only an accidental rogue, but he's certainly not perfect and Cal, as you say, is a decent man. It's sad he can't see that, but it's quite useful for fanfiction writers! Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. To be honest, I thought the last minute was the very earliest Cal could be expected to tell Ariel! It would be nice if he really thought he was special. It would be one thing he and Ethan agree on.

* * *

Ethan jumped as he felt a hand on his shoulder. "A word in my office when you've got a minute, Dr Hardy?"

"Yes, Mrs Beauchamp," he said. "Of course. Actually, I could come now if you wanted me to. I wasn't doing anything."

"I rather thought you weren't," was the reply, and Ethan's cheeks were slightly tinged with pink as he followed Connie to her office.

She invited him to sit down, which was by no means a given when you were asked to visit the clinical lead's office, and Ethan sat nervously, staring at a stain on his scrubs and hoping Connie hadn't noticed it. He thought it was probably coffee, but it could be just about anything in this job.

"I was just wondering how you were coping," said Connie. "I certainly have no complaints about your work rate – you're working a little more slowly than the ideal, but that's usually the way with you. But I know that just because a doctor can work calmly and competently, it doesn't mean he's feeling that way inside."

Ethan felt tears building up, but he was determined not to disgrace himself in Connie's office again. "I'm okay, thank you, Mrs Beauchamp. I'm just a bit concerned. Cal and Ariel had an appointment with Ariel's obstetrician and they really should be out by now, even allowing for the fact that you wouldn't normally expect them to be seen on time. But I know that doesn't necessarily mean that anything has gone wrong."

"On the contrary: if something had gone wrong for Dr Knight, I imagine you'd be the first person he'd tell!" said Connie.

Ethan wasn't sure if this was meant to be funny or not, but he gave a small smile in acknowledgement of her words. "There is a lot of truth in that."

"Is it likely that something has gone wrong?" said Connie. "Has it not been a straightforward pregnancy?"

"In terms of the actual pregnancy, yes," said Ethan. "But Cal wants a paternity test and Ariel wants it done as soon as possible so there's no doubt. The last time I spoke to them, Cal had neglected to mention that the pregnancy is too far advanced for a paternity test."

"Yes, but obstetrics is a long way from being Dr Knight's area of expertise," said Connie. "Perhaps it's only sensible to leave it to the expert to break the news."

"But he does know it's unlikely so he should have warned her," argued Ethan. Then he sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry to involve you in all this, Mrs Beauchamp. I'm just worried that if Cal hasn't told Ariel, she'll feel as betrayed by him as she does by me, and then she'll have no support at all. But I shouldn't be bothering you with my personal problems."

"It becomes my concern when it's affecting one of my best doctors," said Connie. "It's always worrying when it looks as though a vulnerable young woman is alone in the world, but there is only so much we can do to prevent it. There is support out there and Ariel can access it if she needs to."

Ethan nodded. "I gave her a list of organisations she can contact."

"Then you've done all you can – and more than a lot of doctors would do," said Connie. "It's not a bad thing to care about your patients, Ethan, but there's always a danger that you might end up caring too much. You need to set boundaries for yourself and stick to them. I hope you can because you have the potential to become one of the best doctors in this department. In some ways, you already are."

"Oh… um… thank you," said Ethan, a bit flustered.

"I'm only stating the truth," said Connie. "But you're welcome." She looked at him for a moment: just long enough to make Ethan squirm a little bit, though that wasn't necessarily her intention. "Dr Hardy, I think it might help if you did a short course about detachment, but I don't think it's the right time now. We'll wait and see what happens with your brother and Ariel and the babies. For now, you're doing the right thing by focusing on your work, so I'll let you get back to it now."

Ethan got to his feet. "Thank you, Mrs Beauchamp. It does help to talk to you."

"I'm glad to hear it," said Connie. "Now go and get some work done, Dr Hardy. And if you need a slightly longer break than usual when your brother decides to make contact, I'm prepared to turn a blind eye… up to a point."

"Thank you," said Ethan, and turned to leave.

"Oh, and Dr Hardy?" said Connie, as Ethan walked through the door.

He turned. "Yes?"

"Please wipe that coffee stain off your trousers."

* * *

Cal and Ariel walked out of the hospital together and stood for a moment in the cool air. Cal didn't know quite what to say and he suspected Ariel didn't either. The two of them and Toni had discussed options and had decided the paternity test would be done on the day of the twins' birth, assuming there were no health considerations which would of course take precedence.

There had been a lot of talk about Ariel's birth plan and Cal was surprised by how much it interested him. He was glad that Ariel planned on having her baby in hospital with pain relief and hadn't gone for anything silly and modern like having the baby in a swimming pool with aromatherapy massage and reflexology instead of pain relief. The safety of the babies was far more important than any silly whims of the mother's and Cal believed the hospital was by far the best place for a birth.

The only awkward part had come when Toni had asked Ariel if Cal would be her birth partner. Ariel had said that was entirely up to Cal and Cal had said without really thinking about it that he'd be happy to be her birth partner. Cal couldn't forget the look in Ariel's green eyes when he'd said this: a mixture of gratitude and fear.

He wasn't offended by the fear because he was feeling exactly the same thing himself. He felt no regret, but he definitely felt fear.

"I did mean it, you know," he said, breaking the silence between them. "About being your birth partner."

Ariel turned to face him. "Really?" she asked softly.

"Of course I did," said Cal. "I mean, it should be me, if they're my babies."

"Oh," said Ariel, and looked away.

"But I do also want to," said Cal.

Ariel turned back to him, her face suffused with a smile he hadn't seen before.

No, he _had_ seen it before. He knew he had. She'd smiled at him like that afterwards, as she lay in his arms, her face so close to his, and he'd known…

…what?

Frustratingly, the rest of the memory surged out of his reach and Cal wasn't even sure if any of it was real now.

"Oh, Cal," said Ariel. "I thought you'd never… well, I don't suppose you do believe me. Not yet. But I'm so happy you're going to be there and that you're accepting it's possible." Her eyes filled with tears. "I'm sorry, Cal. I'm just so happy. I thought I'd never see you again. Even when I did, I thought I could never talk to you again. But here you are…"

Cal wrapped his arms around her, holding her even more tightly than before. They were standing now so he could get closer. She fitted so perfectly into his arms.

No, that was a stupid romantic cliché. All girls fitted into his arms because he could mould his arms to any girl. Arms were very flexible in that way. But Ariel was different. He was sure she was different. He just wished he could remember.

"Don't cry, beautiful," he whispered into her hair. "It's okay now. I'm here and I'm not leaving you."

That sounded familiar too.

Cal moved away from her, though he didn't let go. "Ariel, I know this probably sounds weird, but have I said that before?"

"Yes," said Ariel shakily. "We met outside a club. You were about to go in. I was just walking past, but there was this guy following me. I was so afraid, but you got rid of him and then you hugged me. I called you my knight in shining armour. And then you said…"

"…'oh, so you know me!'" said Cal.

He felt Ariel gripping the back of his shirt. "Yes. Yes, you did! Though you didn't actually tell me your surname was Knight. I didn't know that until… until later."

Cal knew she meant Ethan, but he didn't want her to think about Ethan. Cal didn't want to think about Ethan either. "And you laughed at me through your tears and said that was the worst line you'd ever heard."

"Yes, I did," said Ariel. "I'm sorry."

Cal laughed. "No. No, it was probably about time someone told me. And… what happened after that?" He knew some of what had happened after that, but he knew he wouldn't have gone home with her straight away. Ariel wouldn't have agreed just like that. Not when she never slept with guys on the…

… _does this mean I believe her? Does this mean I believe I'm going to be a dad?_

"You said I probably needed a drink after all that and I said I didn't drink," said Ariel.

"So I took you to…" Cal sighed. "I don't remember. I'm sorry. But there is a late-night coffee place. Did I take you there?"

"Yes, you did," said Ariel. "And you were so kind. You wanted to take me to the police station to report the guy and I said no."

Cal stroked her back gently. "I hope I encouraged you to think about it."

"Of course you did," said Ariel. "But I just wanted to forget about it for a while. And you helped me forget."

Cal let her curls run through his fingers, watching them spring back, and he knew he'd done that before too. "And then _I_ forgot."

Then Ariel sighed and let go of him. "And that's what I don't understand. You weren't drunk when I saw you. You were with me until 6am. So how did you get drunk enough to forget me?"

"I have absolutely no idea," said Cal.


	27. Chapter 27

_I'm sorry interest in this story has dropped - to be honest, I don't blame you as I've never been happy with it! I'll try to finish it soon._

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. I think Connie is a big help for Ethan as he doesn't really have anyone else he can talk to. Cal is starting to accept that Ariel's babies might be his - and not before time!

 **Tanith Panic** , I'll be quite interested to know how this is going to work out too - I'm not completely sure! I'm worried Connie might be going OOC, but Ethan really needs some compassion from someone! Thank you for your review.

* * *

The sound of a text arriving did nothing for Ethan's headache, but he smiled at his patient all the same and did his best to hide his discomfort. "I'm sorry: I'm going to have to look at that. I'm expecting one of my colleagues to text me about a patient." It wasn't really a lie. Cal was definitely his colleague and Ariel had just been to a hospital appointment…

To his relief, the text was from Cal. _Were out. Everythings fine. Paternity test after birth. Im going 2 be there as ariels birth partner so no probs sorting it. Best u stay out the way for now. Im taking ariel 4 lunch._

Ethan would usually have sighed at Cal's text speak and silently questioned whether Cal had really passed his GCSE English, but between feeling heartbroken and headachey, it didn't seem to matter too much. He was glad Cal and Ariel were still friends. It would make things so much easier considering they were going to have two children together and it was only right for Cal to be there at the birth.

But it also upset him that Cal and Ariel had got over their hiccup so easily, whereas Ethan was clearly still the bad guy, to the point where Ariel couldn't even bear to see him.

"Is it bad news?" asked the patient sympathetically.

"No," said Ethan. "Not at all. Actually, it's very good news. Much better than I expected. I thought I'd have to go and... and liaise with the doctor and patient, but I'm not needed. Now, where were we?" He couldn't remember. His mind was still full of Ariel and Cal. At the birth together.

Although he'd never said anything about it, Ethan had been hoping for some time that he might be there.

He closed his eyes and lifted a hand to massage his forehead, only to stop as he realised what he was doing.

"You were going to write me a prescription and advise me on what to do if I get the same symptoms again," prompted the patient.

"Oh, yes, of course," said Ethan. "Thank you. I'll… I'll be back soon."

He thought he'd be glad to have a moment or two to himself, away from the patient, but it just meant he had nothing to focus on; no reason to hide the sadness that was filling his heart and his eyes.

"Ethan." Connie appeared out of nowhere. "Go and have a break."

Ethan blinked his tears away and gave a sad smile. "I'm okay, Mrs Beauchamp. I've nearly finished with my patient. I'll go and have a break then. I'll be fine."

"Are you sure?" said Connie. "Have you had any news?"

"Everything's fine and Cal's going to be Ariel's birth partner," said Ethan. To his relief, his voice was calm. "It's the best thing that could have happened. It probably means Cal's going to accept the children as his, if he hasn't already. Ariel is happy to have a paternity test after the birth. So it's all good news."

"That depends on your point of view, though, doesn't it?" said Connie.

Ethan nodded. "I just want Ariel to be happy and Cal to face up to his responsibilities. It looks like that's happening."

"Ethan, even if Cal does agree to accept the babies as his, that doesn't mean he has any interest in Ariel," murmured Connie.

"I know," said Ethan. "But it also doesn't mean she has any interest in…" He broke off as Robyn moved a bit too close for comfort.

"Come to my office when you've finished with your patient," said Connie. "If you don't want to talk, at least you can have some privacy. And some paracetamol for your headache."

"Thank you," said Ethan gratefully.

* * *

Cal carried the tray back to the table. "Here you are. Tea and salmon sandwiches as requested. And also a chocolate cake."

He was a bit worried when he saw the shocked look on Ariel's face.

"Is everything okay?" he asked nervously.

"I had chocolate cake when you took me to the café," said Ariel. "The day we met. I told you it was my favourite. I was just wondering…"

"I thought I chose it because it looked nice," admitted Cal. "But you never know. And I'll know for next time."

He was worried he might have disappointed her, but her face lit up and he found himself smiling back, unable to stop himself.

Cal walked Ariel to the door of her flat and stood in the doorway, finding to his surprise that he didn't want to say goodbye. "Maybe we should arrange a time to discuss the birth plan. And I'll need to go to antenatal classes." The excitement he felt surprised him. "I want to get everything just right."

Ariel looked at him in surprise and pleasure. "Of course you can, Cal. My next class is later this week. Come in and I'll write down the day and time for you."

"Thanks," said Cal, as they went into the flat together. He was smiling. "So another thing I must have mentioned to you is that I can never remember anything unless someone writes it down for me."

"Yes… except half the time, you lose the piece of piece of paper," said Ariel. She found a pad of post-it notes on the kitchen table. "So I'll give you a sticky bit of paper and you can stick it somewhere to remind yourself." She started to write.

"No, don't stand up: come and sit down and write it," said Cal in a sudden panic. "You've already had a stressful day: you shouldn't go standing up when you don't have to."

Ariel turned to face him. There was an odd look on her face. "Do you really care that much?"

Cal realised he felt a bit weird. Slightly dizzy. Perhaps he was hungry. "Well, they're my babies you're carrying…"

He watched Ariel's face as it filled with disappointment and she started to turn away, but then she froze, turning back to him. "Your babies, Cal?"

"My babies," said Cal. He moved closer to her and slowly moved his hands towards her. She placed her hands in his and he squeezed them gently before letting go. He had no objection to holding her hands, but that wasn't what he was after. Very carefully, giving her plenty of time to say no, he placed his hand on her stomach. Inexplicably, his eyes filled with tears. "My babies."

Ariel put her hands over his. "Cal, are you okay?"

"Of course I'm okay," said Cal, blinking hard. "I'm just… I'm going to be a dad."

"Yes, you are." Ariel was looking tearful too now. "You really are."

Cal smiled. "And you're going to be a fantastic mum. I know you are."

For a long moment, they just looked at each other, smiling, Cal's hands on her bump and her hands on his.

Then the spell seemed to break and Cal moved his hands away, clearing his throat, while Ariel fussed with her hair.

"The antenatal classes," said Ariel at last.

"Right. But don't write it standing up!"

Ariel picked up the post-it note and paper and went to sit on the sofa. Cal went to sit beside her and only realised afterwards that perhaps he should have sat in one of the chairs.

"Here you are," said Ariel, almost shyly. "If you change your mind or you can't get the time off work, I understand."

Cal glanced down at the post-it note. It was almost filled with a large, flowing script which Cal thought he could just about decipher. "Antenatal class, Friday 2.30. Good thing that isn't a dental appointment."

Ariel blinked at him and gave a slightly smile. "Isn't it always good when it isn't a dental appointment?"

"Well… yeah," admitted Cal. "But 2.30 is the worst because 'two-thirty' sounds a bit like 'tooth hurty'. That's one of…" He stopped. He didn't want to mention Ethan. He felt guilty for it; for pretending his brother didn't exist when he'd given so much support to both of them.

But the new closeness that seemed to have sprung up between them: he didn't want to do anything to jeopardise that. If he could, he could lose his babies. He could lose Ariel.

Ariel was giggling and didn't seem to have noticed Cal's half-finished sentence. "Oh, I see! That's clever."

 _Finally, a girl who can appreciate Ethan's sense of humour_ , thought Cal, and was shocked by a flash of jealousy.

Why would he be jealous? He liked Ariel, sure, but she was Ethan's girl. Maybe she wasn't speaking to him at the moment, but she was sure it was only a matter of time.

"Cal," said Ariel, and when he looked, he saw there was a serious expression on her face now. "Cal, I don't want to be rude, but didn't you say you were working this afternoon? It's after half-past one."

"It isn't!" Cal looked at his watch in horror. "You're right. I do need to go." He got to his feet. "Sorry, Ariel."

Ariel prepared to stand up, placing her hands on her knees and arching her back.

Cal put his hand on her shoulder. "Please don't get up, Ariel. Stay there and rest. You've had a difficult day. I'll see myself out."

"I don't mind," said Ariel.

"But I do," said Cal simply. "I want you to take care of my babies." He stood looking down at her, one hand on each of her shoulders now. "And I want you to take care of yourself too."

He bent and quickly brushed his lips across her forehead. His mouth tingled from the contact and all he wanted was to bend down still further and kiss her properly, but he knew he mustn't. Their relationship – no, their friendship – was so tenuous, and there was Ethan to consider.

"Thank you for everything, Cal," said Ariel.

"You're welcome," said Cal.


	28. Chapter 28

**Tato Potato** , thank you for your review. I'm so pleased you enjoyed the chapter. I hope they will be good parents - but will Ethan be a good uncle?

 **Bonnie Sveen Fan** I'm so glad you haven't lost interest. I'm glad Cal came across as being sweet - he does have that side to him and that's what I was aiming for. Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , I have to agree about salmon. It's all slimy! But I still craved it. I had to sneak that pun in even though Ethan wasn't there. Cal is flawed, but I don't think I'd like him so much if he was perfect. Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , it would be bad if Cal developed feelings for Ariel - either Ethan would be completely heartbroken or they both would. I'm still not quite sure how I'm going to resolve it. Thank you for your review.

* * *

Ethan heard a light knock on Connie's door and quickly dabbed his eyes before putting his glasses back on. He didn't think anyone would dare to walk in without knocking, but he wasn't taking any chances. He sniffed and brushed his tissue across his nose before stuffing it into his pocket. His forehead still throbbed despite the medication he'd taken and he lifted his hand to massage it, only to drop it as the door opened.

As it happened, he needn't have worried. It was only Connie and she already knew how upset he was.

She shut the door behind her and sat down next to him. "I've informed the parents."

"Thank you," whispered Ethan. He swallowed hard and cleared his throat. "I'm sorry for being so unprofessional."

"Yes, you were unprofessional," said Connie. "But only in terms of not being able to control your emotions, and considering you've been struggling to control them for the last couple of days, your reaction wasn't really surprising. In terms of your efforts to save the patient and your decision to ask for me at the point when you did, I can't fault your professionalism. You dealt with the situation as well as any doctor could."

Ethan nodded, relieved he hadn't messed up completely. He hadn't been completely sure. Not with his emotions in such a whirl. "Thank you," he said again. "I… I can go back to work now."

"No, you can't," said Connie with decision. "I'm not saying it's not inconvenient, but we managed this morning without your brother and I'm sure we can manage without you now."

"I am okay," said Ethan, quite horrified at the thought of being sent home. He'd only been sent home a few times in his career and that was almost always due to illness and as much out of consideration to the patients as to Ethan himself.

"I believe you, Dr Hardy," said Connie. "I know that if I sent you back to work, you'd do an exemplary job as always and run rings around your brother. But sometimes you have to consider the accumulative effect. It's much better for you to take some time for yourself now when we can spare you rather than in a few days' time when you're on the point of collapse and we really can't do without you."

"I'll be fine," said Ethan. "Really."

Connie stood up. "No, it's not open to negotiation, I'm afraid. I've already phoned for a taxi."

"Oh, thank you, Mrs Beauchamp, but there's no need," said Ethan. "I can drive. I don't want to cause any inconvenience."

Connie smiled. "No-one could fault your commitment, Dr Hardy, could they? That's one reason why I don't want to push you beyond your limits. But if you prefer, I can send you home due to illness: it doesn't look like the paracetamol I gave you have done much for your headache. If you leave immediately, I will cancel the taxi. Does that sound fair?"

"Yes, Mrs Beauchamp," mumbled Ethan. He didn't want to go, but if his clinical lead ordered it, what choice did he have? Besides, if it meant avoiding Cal for the next few hours…"But I'll come in early tomorrow to make up for it."

"Just make sure you're not late," said Connie.

It was only once Ethan was driving home that it occurred to him that part of the reason why Connie wanted him to leave was because she didn't want him to come face-to-face with Cal. When the brothers were in opposition, the department tended not to run as smoothly as it might.

* * *

Cal looked for Ethan when he arrived back at work, but there was no sign of him. Cal didn't know if he was relieved or worried. He was worried Ethan would ask for more details about the appointment, which would put Cal in an awkward position as it would be a breach of confidentiality, but he knew Ethan was on shift this afternoon and he would only go home early if anything was seriously wrong.

He sent Ethan a text and got a reply a short time later. He wasn't sure if the text was reassuring or not. Ethan said he'd had a headache all day and then lost a patient and Connie had decided to send him home.

Cal could well believe that a headachey, distraught Ethan would find saying no to Connie even more impossible than usual, but he couldn't help thinking it was more than that. Ethan didn't usually get this upset over losing patients. He didn't find it easy – no doctor did – but if he did get upset, it was a sure sign that something else was wrong. The headache might be reason enough, but Cal didn't think so.

"Did Ethan really have a headache?" he asked Connie when he passed her in the corridor.

Connie raised her eyebrows. "You surely don't think I'd let a member of my staff go home when he wasn't genuinely ill?"

"It just doesn't seem like Ethan to go home just because he's got a headache," said Cal.

"It was a particularly bad headache and medication wasn't helping," said Connie. "He lost a patient today as well. A little girl. He took it badly, as we all do sometimes. He was actually happy to stay and work, but I insisted he went home. Now, I must get on. Count yourself lucky, Dr Knight, that you got even that much of an explanation."

Cal walked away, feeling firmly put in his place, and tried to focus on his work, but he found his thoughts drifting again. He was worried about Ethan – and also about Ariel. He'd never felt responsible for anyone before – not even himself: not really; not when Ethan was there to pick up the pieces. But he knew it was his fault his brother was so unhappy and his fault Ariel had struggled alone for so long and he really wanted to make it up to both of them.

Ariel had been through a terrible ordeal, abandoned by him (in circumstances that still confused him); going through most of her pregnancy completely alone; dismissed as a liar by Cal when she'd finally found him again; and now betrayed by Ethan. It looked as though the future would be difficult too. Even with Cal's help, looking after twins would be difficult and there was also the significant problem that Ariel disliked her children's uncle.

It still seemed slightly ridiculous to Cal. He wouldn't have blamed Ariel if she didn't like _him_ , but how could anyone dislike his little brother? Cal found him annoying at times, but most people loved hm.

So many complications. So many confusions. For a moment or two, Cal felt completely overwhelmed, but then he began to think. They would manage somehow. He would see to it that they managed, but for now, Ariel could really do with a treat. She needed to go out and have fun. Forget about the future for a while and just enjoy herself.

Cal racked his brains to try to remember something about her. It would have to be something Ethan had told him, as he still only had the vaguest memories of their time together, and he had a feeling that any other memories lurking in his unconscious could only be unlocked by Ariel.

She wasn't keen on Disney films. He remembered that. But he had a feeling she had appalling taste in music. Who was it she liked… he couldn't remember.

Cal went to find his next patient, a very chatty little girl who informed him, among other things, which celebrities she was considering marrying. One was an actor, one was a footballer… and one was a popstar.

Only his professionalism stopped Cal from giving the little girl a hug of gratitude. He felt even more relieved he hadn't given in to the urge when she confided that she was adding his name to her list of potential husbands. All the same, he smiled at her, gave her a pound to get something from the vending machine "to keep your strength up", and took his break as soon as he'd discharged her.

He was feeling quite positive and for once in his life, he was lucky. He found what he was looking for straight away and it couldn't have been more perfect. The fact that Ariel's favourite band would be at the O2 in the next couple of days seemed little short of miraculous, but Cal wasn't one to turn down miracles.

It wasn't until he tried to book tickets that he realised the problem he really should have foreseen. The concert was sold out; it had been for months. Even the VIP packages were no longer available – not that Cal could have afforded one anyway.

Disappointment filled Cal and he let his head drop into his hands, but then an idea came to him. He recalled an evening at the pub from a couple of months ago; a conversation that had obviously happened before he'd got too drunk to remember it. After checking that Connie was nowhere in the vicinity, he hurried out of the ED.

When he arrived at the ambulance station, Dixie and Iain were discussing boobs. It was one of Cal's favourite subjects too (he had a feeling Ariel's were beautiful: not huge but nevertheless perfect), but Cal had more important considerations. "Iain. You know your mate Rocker? Didn't he say he used to babysit someone famous?"

A dubious look appeared on Iain's face. "He _says_ he used to babysit Harry from One Direction. That's one of his chat-up lines. But I don't know if it's really true. That guy will say anything."

"Have you got his number?" said Cal.

Iain seemed surprised, but gave it to Cal without too much protest. Cal thanked him with a fervency that obviously surprised him and Dixie, and left the ambulance station with the number already dialled and the phone pressed to his ear.


	29. Chapter 29

**Tanith Panic** , I'm glad you like the way I've written Connie - she has two sides to her and it's fun writing them both in the same sentence. I'd planned the concert trip from the start, but I didn't know how Cal would get tickets until Rocker gave me the idea! Thank you for your review.

 **Gillian Kearney Fan** , thank you for your review - I'm pleased you enjoyed the chapter.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. Cal stepped up for Matilda, so I thought he should start doing the same for the twins. A night out would be good for Ariel and she won't have many for the next few years!

 _Thank you to **Gingersnaps2507** for the favourite._

* * *

As soon as Cal arrived home, he went to look for Ethan. He'd been worried about him all day. The first place he tried was Ethan's bedroom, but after Ethan had failed to respond to his knocks, Cal poked his head inside to discover it was empty. The bathroom was also unoccupied, but the flat wasn't that large and he soon found Ethan lying on the living room sofa with a cloth over his forehead.

"Oh, so you really do have a headache?" said Cal, surprised.

Ethan nodded, the movement making him wince.

Cal knelt beside him and dropped his voice to a whisper. "Have you had any painkillers?"

"Can't take any more till after dinner," Ethan whispered back.

"I'll make you some," said Cal. "What would you like?"

"I feel a bit sick," said Ethan. "So maybe I could have something plain?"

"Sure," said Cal. He picked up the thermometer from the table beside Ethan and stuck it in his brother's ear. "Oh my God!"

"Do you have to shout?" groaned Ethan.

"Sorry." Cal stroked Ethan's hair. "Don't worry. You're fine. I was pretending to be shocked because it says you're normal, but on second thoughts, it probably isn't very funny."

Ethan closed his eyes. "I don't feel normal."

Cal put the thermometer down. "I'm sure you'll feel better once you've got some food and a painkiller inside you." He touched the cloth on Ethan's forehead. "Would you like me to get this wet again for you?"

"Yes, please," said Ethan, his eyes still shut.

"No problem." Cal smiled as he looked at his brother, thinking how sweet he looked, but at the same time, he was worried. It wasn't like Ethan to give in to a headache, even though this one seemed particularly bad. "I'll be back in a minute."

He wet the cloth, wrung it out and returned to Ethan's side. When he put the cool cloth over his brother's forehead, Ethan smiled in gratitude. "Thanks, Cal."

"You're welcome, Nibbles." Cal ran his hands through Ethan's hair.

"That feels nice," murmured Ethan.

Cal carried on doing it. "I'll have to go and make dinner soon, but I'll stay for a couple of minutes. How long have you been feeling like this?"

Ethan closed his eyes. "All day, really. I didn't sleep very well. Then I went to work and I think they had all the monitors turned up extra loud. I don't usually notice the beeps unless there's something abnormal about them, but it was really making my head vibrate today."

"And then you lost the patient," said Cal gently as he let his fingers travel above Ethan's ears to his temples.

"She was so young, Cal," said Ethan, sounding very young himself. "It's never easy, as you know. But some days…"

Cal's fingers moved in gentle circles. "Some days it just gets to you, doesn't it?"

"It does," sighed Ethan.

Cal's fingers slipped behind Ethan's head and massaged the base of his skull. "It's always worse when you're not very well. So much of your mental strength goes on fighting the pain, so there's not much left to deal with the emotional side." He knew it wasn't just that, but Ethan didn't argue.

"Mrs Beauchamp said there was nothing more that could be done," said Ethan. "She said I couldn't have done more."

"Mrs Beauchamp doesn't say things like that unless she means it," said Cal. He looked at Ethan in sudden concern. "The relatives didn't say anything to upset you, did they?"

Ethan's voice wobbled slightly. "I didn't see them. Mrs Beauchamp did it for me. I know it was my job, but…"

Cal guessed he'd been too upset. He took Ethan's hand in his. "It's okay. It happens to all of us. Sometimes you put so much into trying to save a life, you haven't got anything left. And if Mrs Beauchamp was there anyway, it's right for her to take the lead. That's _her_ job."

"I suppose so," said Ethan, blinking hard.

"I know so," said Cal.

Ethan gave a shaky smile. "Thanks, Cal."

Cal squeezed his hand. "What are big brothers for?" He picked up the cloth, brushed it over Ethan's cheeks and neck, and put it back on his forehead, the other way up. "Will you be okay if I go and make dinner now?"

"Yes," said Ethan with a faint smile, but as Cal was leaving, he called him back. "Cal… I'm glad it went well at Ariel's appointment. I-I'm glad you're going to be her birth partner."

Cal returned to his side. "Are you sure you're okay with that?"

Ethan's eyes looked slightly shiny. He blinked and smiled. "I think it should be you. You're the father."

Cal couldn't stop himself from smiling. "Yes, I am!"

"You've accepted it then?" Ethan looked shocked.

"Yeah… I'm not sure what's changed," said Cal. "I remembered a couple of things. It's not really enough to be sure, but I just feel different about it now. I don't know why."

Ethan swallowed visibly. "You probably remembered trusting her," he said. His face went even paler. "Oh my goodness. Cal, could you get me a bucket, please?"

Cal ran to get one, but Ethan didn't need it. The colour began to return to his face. Cal got him some water and sat with him for as long as he could, but he thought Ethan really needed to eat. "I'd better get on with dinner if you're okay for me to leave you?"

"I'll be fine," said Ethan.

"Okay. Call me if you need me," said Cal. He ruffled Ethan's hair and started to leave.

"Cal?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks. For being here."

Cal smiled, touched. "Anytime, Nibbles."

* * *

Ethan did feel a bit better once he'd eaten. Cal insisted that he go and lie down again, but Ethan was tired and didn't mind too much. Cal sat on the floor beside him, stroking his hand. Ethan thought about telling him he didn't have to do that, but then he realised he liked it.

"Ethan I…" Cal felt in his pocket. "I got these."

Ethan took them from him. Without his glasses, all he could tell was that they were two small rectangles made of card with what looked like black printing on them. He brought them closer to his face. "One Direction?" He tried to hide the pain that passed through him – though even if he hadn't, Cal might have put it down to his headache. "For Ariel?"

Cal nodded. "I thought she could do with a treat."

"I think you're right," said Ethan with another pang. He glanced at the price, as he usually did when Cal bought something. "You got them for free?"

"Iain's mate Rocker got them for me," said Cal. "He used to babysit Harry Styles."

"Really?" said Ethan doubtfully.

"Must do," said Cal. "He got me the tickets."

Ethan forced a smile. "I'm glad you're talking to Iain again."

"Yeah. I was nervous at first. I've kind of being avoiding him since the barstools incident," admitted Cal. "But I feel sort of… I don't know. Different. Like I've got a purpose."

"I'm glad," said Ethan sincerely. Into his mind crept the thought: _I wish I had a purpose_ , but he chased it away. Of course he had a purpose. He was a doctor.

"Before, I felt like such a waste of space," said Cal. "I felt like there was nothing in me but emptiness and sadness and I couldn't see things ever getting any better. But I was wrong."

"Yes, you very often are," said Ethan, with what was meant to be a teasing smile. He wasn't sure he managed it.

"And I'm going to be a dad," said Cal, smiling as he said the words. "It's pretty scary. But it's amazing."

Ethan's smile was sad this time. "It is. I hope you and Ariel have a good time at the concert. You do know twins often come early?"

Cal laughed. "Yeah, I do actually. I've been reading up, though I did know that already. But Ethan…"

"Yes, Caleb?"

"The tickets aren't for me," said Cal. "I thought maybe you could go with Ariel. I mean, I'm the twins' dad and I'm going to do whatever it takes to be a good dad. But I know you care about her and I don't want to stand in your way."

Ethan fought back tears.

"Ethan?" Cal put his hand on Ethan's shoulder. "Hey. Ethan."

"Sorry." Ethan brushed his tears away. "I'm okay really. I'm probably just not quite well."

Cal regarded him anxiously. "But you'll go?"

Ethan thought about it for a moment, but then he shook his head. "I can't."

"Of course you can!" exclaimed Cal.

"No." Ethan's voice was quiet and sad. "I appreciate the thought, Cal. I appreciate it so much and I really wish I could accept. I hope Ariel will forgive me one day. I'm going to be an uncle and I hope so much that I'll have a part to play in the twins' lives."

"So, take the twins out to a nice concert with their mum," said Cal.

Ethan shook his head. "I can't. I wish I could, but the most important person... no. The most important _three_ people are Ariel and the twins. They're all alone in the world and very vulnerable. If we upset Ariel, she'll be alone. We can't do anything to risk that happening. I hope, in the future, there will be a place for me in her life, but for now, we can only think about the present. As you say, Ariel needs a treat. She needs to go with someone she feels comfortable with. Someone she trusts. That's you, Cal."

Cal shook his head, looking upset. "I can't do that to you."

"I already said I'm not important – but this is actually the best thing you could do for me." Ethan spoke through a lump in his throat. "If you make Ariel happy now and don't put too much pressure on her, there's more chance that she might forgive me and become my friend in the future."

Cal looked like he was about to argue, but then a look of resignation passed across his face. "Maybe you're right."

"You know I'm right," said Ethan. He tried to smile. "It's the only way, Cal."

"You mean… you mean I've got to sit through that God-awful music?" said Cal.

Ethan smiled. "There is a lot worse out there. They're perfectly acceptable voices singing perfectly acceptable songs. But even if it wasn't, if it makes Ariel happy, isn't it worth it?"

Cal nodded and smiled. "Yeah, it's worth it," he said.


	30. Chapter 30

**Gillian Kearney Fan** , yes, Cal is a good bro. He usually means well, but this time he's actually doing the right thing. Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , there are definitely much worse than One Direction out there - maybe Cal will enjoy it more than he thinks! It's a shame Ariel isn't a twin herself. That might solve the problem... but that would be too easy! Thank you for your review.

 _Thank you to **Tanith Panic** for the follow and favourite._

* * *

Cal stopped the car outside the ED. "You're sure you'll be okay?"

Ethan smiled at him, but it was quite a sad smile. "Of course I will. My head feels much better and you know the best thing is to get stuck back in as soon as possible after you lose a patient."

Cal agreed, but he knew that wasn't the only thing bothering Ethan at the moment. "Just take things a bit easy and don't be afraid to take a break if you need one."

"I won't need one," said Ethan. "But thank you."

"I'll see you after lunch," said Cal. He'd originally asked to come in an hour later so he could go and see Ariel and check she was okay, but Connie had said he could have the whole morning off. It didn't make much sense to Cal, but he made a point of never arguing about things like that.

"I hope it goes well with Ariel." There was a slight tremor in Ethan's voice as he said her name.

Cal felt guilty as he drove away, but he didn't see what choice he had. He could hardly abandon the mother of his children.

But he was sure Ariel would come around to Ethan. He was a great guy. A bit weird, maybe, but in a nice way.

* * *

When he arrived at Ariel's flat, she opened the door almost straight away. "Hi, Cal."

"Hey." Cal hesitated, then put his hands on her shoulders and bent to kiss her on the cheek. He felt a thrill of something and held on for a moment longer than he'd meant to. He cleared his throat. "How are the three of you?"

Ariel smiled and he could see the excitement sparkling in her eyes. "We're all good, thanks. Have you got time to come in?"

"I've got the whole morning," said Cal. "And there are no three people I'd rather spend it with."

Ariel blushed a bit, which Cal found strangely fascinating. She smiled at him and showed him inside. "Would you like a drink?"

"I would, if you let me make it."

"Okay. Just this once," said Ariel. "I have something I want to show you anyway."

By the time the drinks were ready, Ariel was sitting on the sofa with a book in her lap. It looked like a photo album to Cal. He put the drinks down on the table and sat beside her. "This looks interesting!"

"This is my pregnancy album," said Ariel, a bit shyly. "I was wondering if you wanted to see the pictures? It's okay if you don't."

Cal hadn't even thought about it before, but the words burst out of him. "I'd love to!"

"Here you are then." Ariel handed him the album and he opened it. "These are photos of myself – I took them every month after finding out I was pregnant. I've got them all online too, but... it probably sounds silly, but I've got this vision of showing the babies. Letting them touch the pictures as well as looking."

"It doesn't sound silly at all." Cal gazed down at the pictures, smiling. For every month, from three months to seven months, there was a picture of Ariel from the side, the front, and a picture of her stomach from above. At first, you couldn't tell Ariel was pregnant, but as his eyes travelled along the pictures, the bump grew and grew. "Beautiful."

"Really?" said Ariel softly.

"Really," said Cal, tearing himself away from the pictures so he could meet her eyes.

They stared at each other for several seconds, then both looked away almost at the same time.

"So, those are the seven-month pictures… you must be nearly ready for eight-months," said Cal.

Ariel nodded. "I can never keep track of the date very well, but I think it's this week."

"I could take the pictures for you today if you wanted," offered Cal. "That's probably easier than doing them yourself. We could take them outside. It's nice and warm."

Ariel looked startled and for a moment he thought she might say no. He could understand it: it had always been a private moment for her and the twins, but it would hurt if she rejected his offer because they were his babies too.

"Do you really want to?" said Ariel incredulously.

"I'd love to," said Cal.

"Oh, Cal, so would I!" There were tears in Ariel's eyes, but she was smiling.

Cal took her hand and squeezed it. "We could do it today if you like."

"I can't wait," said Ariel. She looked down at the pictures again. "I always thought it was so silly, taking these pictures."

"Why?" said Cal. "These memories are so precious. It's all part of your babies' development, isn't it?" He smiled. "And if you take a picture, it lasts longer!"

Ariel laughed. "I do like the way you look at things, Cal." She turned the page. "And here are my scans!"

* * *

"Dr Hardy," said Connie.

Ethan was on his way to a patient, but he stopped and smiled at his clinical lead. "Mrs Beauchamp."

Connie motioned with her head and they went to a slightly quieter corner. "I just wanted to check on how you were, Ethan."

"Much better today, thank you," said Ethan. "I think everything just got on top of me a bit."

"Not really surprising," said Connie. "How are things with your brother?"

"Surprisingly okay," said Ethan. "He was really kind when I got home. He got me a cold compress; gave me a bit of a head massage… he might just be after something, but he seemed really worried about me."

Connie laughed. "I think Dr Knight probably does care in his way."

"I think he must do," said Ethan. "I think it helped that I was too ill to object. It could have been a difficult moment, but it wasn't." He paused for a moment. He didn't want to bore Connie with irrelevancies, but he knew she'd want to know if he and Cal could work together. "We talked about Ariel a bit. It was okay. So I think we could work together too."

"That's very good to know, Dr Hardy. I imagine that things might be up and down for you for a while, so make sure you look after yourself and take a break when you need one. I'll keep an eye on you as well. But you're happy for your shifts to coincide with Dr Knight's?"

"Oh, yes: very happy," said Ethan.

"Excellent," said Connie. "I'll leave you to get on."

* * *

Cal took the tissue Ariel offered him and wiped his tears. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," said Ariel. "I cried at my first scan. And the anomaly scan too."

"Were there anomalies?" said Cal anxiously.

Ariel shook her head and laughed. "Not unless having two instead of one counts!"

"I think two is the perfect number." Cal stared down at the scan, his vision blurring again. They were babies. They were real babies and they were _his_. "Two is twice as good as one, isn't it?"

"Then I'm sorry it's not triplets!" said Ariel.

Cal shook his head quickly. "Oh, no. I wouldn't want triplets. Triplets would be terrifying and as for quads... no, two is perfect."

"That's how I feel," said Ariel. "It hasn't been easy. There have been times when I didn't know how I was going to cope. But I always knew I wanted to keep them."

Cal took her hands in his. "It'll be easier now, I hope. You've got me and I'm not going anywhere. Well, except to work. But I'll come back. They're my kids and I want to be involved and I will be."

Ariel's hands tightened on his. "I know you will."

"But speaking of going places…" said Cal.

"Is this where you mention you've booked a six-month holiday in the Far East?" said Ariel, only half-joking.

"No," said Cal: "this is where I mention I've got tickets to see One Direction at the O2 in London."

Ariel stared at him, then shook her head. "Not really."

"Yes: really!" said Cal. He let go of one of her hands and stood up so he could take the tickets out of his pocket. "Here you go." As he handed them over, a horrible thought struck him. "Don't tell me you've got a ticket already."

"How could I afford it?" said Ariel simply. She looked at the tickets. "You got them for free?"

Cal explained about Rocker.

"Oh my God!" said Ariel.

"He says he might be able to sort out an autograph," said Cal, purposely not mentioning that Rocker was also trying to arrange for Ariel to meet One Direction. He knew it probably wouldn't happen and he didn't want to give her too many shocks at once.

"Oh my God! I don't know what to say. I have no words. Thank you, Cal." Ariel jumped up and threw her arms around Cal's neck.

Cal caught her, suddenly breathless.

"Thank you so much," said Ariel. "It's the most amazing thing anyone's ever done for me. Well, the second most amazing thing."

"What's the first?" said Cal, trying not to sound put out.

Ariel planted a kiss on his cheek that made him feel a bit wobbly. "Giving me my beautiful babies, of course."


	31. Chapter 31

**Tanith Panic** , I didn't really like Rocker either, but I'm very happy to use him for my own ends! Thank you for your review. I'm so glad you're enjoying this - I have thought about abandoning it, but you've got that _one thing_ that keeps me _up all night_ reading your _perfect_ reviews and stories - nothing means _more than this_ and _I want_ to create more _midnight memories_ when I catch up with Role Change - which I will do _one way or another -_ I won't let this inadequate _temporary fix_ internet _drag me down_. _Love you goodbye_. (Yes, I did use google. I like what I've heard of One Direction, but I'm no expert. I just hope no-one ever buys Dylan their fourth album.)

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. I love a bit of emotional Cal too! I'm glad you like the way Cal has changed - it was difficult to write, especially as something similar happened with Matilda, and I didn't want him to be completely inconsiderate of Ethan's feelings because we've seen that too! I really appreciate your reviews and I will try to review as many of your stories tonight as this annoying internet lets me. I know I'll enjoy reading them.

* * *

Cal made certain to wipe the smile off his face when he and Ethan met at the end of their shifts, but he thought Ethan could probably tell how happy he was. "How was your day?"

"Good," said Ethan. "A couple of time-wasters. A few stubborn patients who simply would not take my advice; several angry relatives who seemed to think I was capable of performing miracles - the usual."

"Sounds like my day," said Cal, relieved.

Ethan hesitated. "We did lose one patient in Resus. It was tough, but I managed not to disgrace myself."

Cal looked at him in concern. "You should have told me."

"I didn't want to disturb you," said Ethan. "But Dr Hanna was there. She got me a cup of tea and sat with me for a while. I was okay, but she wanted to make sure I had a proper break, since I very often don't."

Cal shook his head, smiling. "You can call her Zoe, you know."

Ethan smiled too. "That's what she said. I'm just worried I might end up calling her Zoe when I shouldn't."

Cal laughed. "I call her Zoe all the time. She doesn't mind. But if you're worried, I'm very happy for you to call me Dr Knight. You can do it at home too if you like."

"I don't think that will be necessary," said Ethan. "But thank you all the same."

* * *

Cal waited until they'd eaten to tell Ethan what was really on his mind. Ethan, he hoped, would be more relaxed after dinner and less likely to run away from a subject distressed him. "I was talking to Ariel about the night we… first met."

Ethan lifted his hands. "I hope you're not going to give me a blow-by-blow description, Caleb, because I have just eaten."

"It sounds like you know more about it than I do," Cal teased him. "I didn't know there was any blowing."

"There's no need to be crude," said Ethan.

"You're the one who brought it up," said Cal.

"And I'll probably bring up my dinner too if you don't change the subject very quickly!" said Ethan.

Cal just about managed not to laugh. "No, it's nothing like that. Just something odd. You know I can remember almost nothing about that night?"

"I'm sure you don't need me to explain why _that_ is," said Ethan.

"Yeah, that's what I thought too," said Cal. "But I spoke to Ariel and she said I didn't seem drunk. I didn't drink when we were together either: I took her to a late-night coffee shop."

Ethan did a double take. "Are you sure Ariel hasn't got the wrong guy?"

"I was surprised too," said Cal. "But that was what she said. So I probably hadn't been drinking beforehand. We didn't drink any alcohol when I came back to her house. So how come I forgot?"

"Is it possible you went on a bender after you left her?" said Ethan.

Cal shook his head. "She said I stayed all night and then went straight to work. At least, I said I was going to work, and judging from the time she said I left, it does seem likely."

"But you forgot about it," said Ethan. "So it follows you must have consumed alcohol at some point. Either that or… oh my goodness." He looked at Cal, his eyes alight. "Cal, how long ago was it you had that head injury?"

Cal stared at him. "What head injury?"

"I'm fairly sure it was around Christmas," said Ethan. "So that's… eight months ago." He looked at Cal triumphantly. "There you go. You walked out of Ariel's flat; hit your head; suffered concussion… and you can't remember the events leading up to the injury. Therefore, you forgot Ariel."

"How did I hit my head?" said Cal.

"It looked like you were hit from behind," said Ethan. "Though the main injury was to your frontal bone when you fell forward as a result."

"I injured my full-frontal bone when some guy took me from behind?" said Cal. "No wonder I blotted that out!"

Ethan glared at him. "Do you want me to help you or not?"

"Yeah, I do. Sorry." Cal thought. "Was that the time I got into a drunken brawl? I'm pretty sure that was around Christmas and as I can't remember it..."

"Well, you were found near a nightclub," said Ethan. "But no alcohol was found in your system. So we assumed you got into a fight on your way into the club."

"What time was I found?" said Cal.

"Early in the morning," said Ethan. "You should have been on your way to your shift. We assumed the attack had happened earlier, when the club was still open."

"If so, it's odd I wasn't found before then," said Cal.

Ethan nodded. "That's what we thought too. But you couldn't remember anything; the CT footage was inconclusive; and it's not uncommon for people to ignore anyone they find lying in the gutter outside a place where alcohol is served."

"Ariel says we met outside a club," said Cal thoughtfully. "I was on my way in. She was walking past. But there was some guy bothering her and I told him to leave her alone. And he did."

Ethan's eyes widened slightly. "You think perhaps he followed you to the coffee place; followed you back to Ariel's; waited for you and then…"

"Hard to say," said Cal. "Maybe he just saw me on his way home and recognised me. Or it could just have been a random attack."

"I suppose we'll never know," said Ethan.

"But I _forgot_ her," said Cal. "I know the chances are I wouldn't have called her, but what if I did intend to this time?"

Ethan looked doubtful. "That wouldn't have been like you."

"I know, but I got together with Taylor not long afterwards," said Cal. "So maybe I was ready for a long-term relationship. Without realising."

Ethan thought, then shook his head. "It's possible, but we can't be sure of anything. Unless something happens to make you remember, we can't be sure of what was going through your head that night."

"I must have been pretty distracted if I let myself get knocked out," said Cal.

"Caleb, there are a million things that might have distracted you." Ethan's voice softened. "I'm not saying you're wrong. Of course it's possible you meant to call her. But I don't see how you could know. Even if… even if you… you _like_ her now, that doesn't mean you liked her then. Taylor changed you. For the better, I think, though I do wish you hadn't had to go through all that in order to change. And I hope you'll believe me when I say I'm not talking about... well, you know. I only mean how much she hurt you."

Cal nodded. He did believe Ethan. "I just hate the thought that I forgot about her."

Ethan moved closer to him. "Cal, I know this won't be any comfort, but the chances are, you'll never remember what happened that night." He touched Cal's forearm briefly. "But none of that matters. It's in the past. You're a different person now. I imagine Ariel is too. It's the present and the future that's important. It's the way you feel about her _now_."

"I don't know how I feel about her now," said Cal. "I think she's great. She's really sweet. I do think it was a mistake for her to shut herself away from help, but I can understand that. She lost her parents. Her sister moved away. Ariel's coping method was to hide from people. If you don't get attached, you can't get hurt. Aurora's was to run away from the place where it happened and start again somewhere new." He smiled. "Not completely different from us, actually. I'm Aurora."

"But I'm not Ariel," said Ethan. "I don't refuse help. Mrs Beauchamp and Dr Hanna, I mean Zoe, both helped me today."

"But I don't think you'd have accepted their help when you first came to the ED," said Cal. "Or if you did, it would only have been to be polite because Dr Nibbles is always polite. But now you're getting better with it and so is Ariel. I'm not going into details about Ariel's obstetrician appointment because it's confidential, but the obstetrician said that was the most Ariel had ever opened up to her."

Ethan's face was expressionless. "You're making some good points, Cal, but where exactly are you going with this?"

"I don't know," said Cal. "That's part of the problem: I don't know. I'm growing and changing and I don't know how or when it started. But I think it's good, Ethan, and I'm just so relieved there's a chance I didn't just abandon Ariel like I did all those other girls. Because Ariel didn't deserve it."

"The others might not have deserved it either," pointed out Ethan.

"Probably not," allowed Cal. "A lot of them were probably in it for the same as me: a night of sex with no commitments. But not all of them."

"I'm sure Lily wasn't," said Ethan.

"No, and Lily didn't deserve it either," said Cal. He gave Ethan a worried look. "I hope you're not suggesting I apologise to Lily because I really don't think she'd like to be reminded of that!"

Ethan shook his head. "No , I agree with you – though I'm saying that for Lily's sake, not yours. But this is good, Cal. You're taking more responsibility and I think that's fantastic. I really do. There's just one thing though."

"What?" said Cal.

"If you panic and decide to run again, it's not just Ariel you're leaving. It's your two children as well."


	32. Chapter 32

**Tanith Panic** , thank you for your review. It made me feel happy. No, the last thing Cal should do is remind Lily of what happened between them! That would be so awkward and there's enough going on here already! Cal could do a lot worse than listen to everything Ethan says.

 **Gillian Kearney Fan** , it must be really confusing having a job when you don't always call people the same thing so you're always kind of wondering which to use! Ethan always has a point! Thank you for your review.

 **CBloom2** , well, it probably is about time Cal grew up! Thank you for your review - I'm glad you enjoyed their talk. A nice, serious conversation and they barely even tried to kill each other. (You could almost say that's OOC...)

 **ETWentHome** , I am considering Cal getting his memories back, but I'll have to think of a convincing way to do it - I don't want them to come back randomly. I'm glad you like the idea of Cal being ready for a serious relationship. Thank you for your review.

* * *

Ethan had decided crying was overrated. It helped in that it meant he didn't have to fight back tears anymore, but now he had a headache, he was thirsty, and his eyes felt sore. He also felt embarrassed and was very glad it was the middle of the night and that he was therefore unlikely to see anyone for several hours.

After spending several minutes trying and failing to convince himself he would be asleep soon, he put his glasses on and got out of bed.

The rest of the flat was in darkness. Ethan switched on the light, but there was no sign of Cal. He went into the kitchen for some paracetamol and realised Cal had put it back in the top cupboard again – too high for Ethan to reach without standing on a chair.

He stayed where he was for a moment, wondering if his headache was worse than the feeling of standing on the chair – he wouldn't be that far off the ground, but he never felt _safe_ – and decided that he'd stand on the chair. At least he wasn't likely to be up there for very long. The headache could last all night.

* * *

Cal couldn't sleep. He'd heard Ethan's door opening and because he'd been listening, he'd been able to detect the soft sound of Ethan's footsteps too. This had worried him, but he hadn't done anything about it because he was too exhausted to get out of bed.

But when time passed and Ethan still didn't return, Cal rolled out of bed and went out into the hall. Ethan hadn't left any lights on, so Cal could only hope he hadn't left anything in the middle of the floor (though if he had, Ethan would probably have tidied it away, putting it in some 'logical' place where Cal would never find it). He walked through the flat, concerned and confused to discover there didn't seem to be any lights on at all.

"Ethan?" he called out as he approached the living room.

"Cal?" said a thin, frightened voice in reply.

"What's up?" said Cal. "Why didn't you put the light on?"

"I did, but the bulb went," said Ethan, almost whimpering with fear.

Even though there was absolutely no reason to doubt Ethan, Cal walked over to where the light switch was and groped around the wall before flicking the switch experimentally. Nothing happened. "So how come you didn't get a candle or a torch? You're not scared of the dark anymore, are you, Nibbles?"

Ethan's voice wavered. "No, but I'm standing on a chair. I needed a paracetamol, but you'd put them on the top shelf again, so I stood on a chair and then the lights went out."

Cal had to admit he'd be slightly freaked out if that had happened to him. It would be much worse if you were afraid of heights like Ethan. He felt his way carefully into the kitchen and found a torch, shining it around the room and quickly finding Ethan. "There you are. Can you get down now?"

"I… yes," said Ethan, but his face looked pale in the torchlight and he didn't move.

Cal walked over to the chair and put the torch under his arm as he lifted Ethan down from the chair. Of course, the torch fell to the floor with a clatter that made Ethan jump and the light go out, but at least Ethan was back on solid ground. Cal felt him shivering and ran his hands over Ethan's shoulders and back. "It's okay now, Ethan. It's okay. You're safe now."

"I know I'm stupid," said Ethan shakily. "It wasn't very far down."

"Hey, it's okay," said Cal. "Everything's more difficult in the dark. Well, except sleeping." He felt behind Ethan for the chair and sat him down on it. "Wait there while I change the… where do you keep the lightbulbs?" He blundered out of the kitchen and walked into something, stubbing his toe and crying out.

"Cal, just put the light on." Ethan's voice was still shaking, but he sounded more amused than upset now. "The rest of the lights should still work."

Cal felt stupid for not thinking of that himself. He switched a light on and looked at Ethan, sitting on the chair with the torch lying at his feet.

Cal picked the torch up and found to his relief that it still worked. He got the box of paracetamol down from the top shelf, took out two tablets and put the box on the middle shelf where Ethan could reach it. There were no glasses in the sink, even though Cal was sure he had left one in there, but he found one in the cupboard and filled it with water. "Here you are, Ethan."

"Thanks." Ethan swallowed the tablet and started to drink the water. He looked a lot less shaky now, but Cal was still concerned. The lighting wasn't good enough for him to be sure, but it looked like Ethan had been crying.

"Ethan, are you okay?" he asked anxiously, bending lifting Ethan's chin so he could have a better look.

"Never better," said Ethan, unable to meet Cal's gaze.

"You haven't been crying then?" said Cal.

"No, I… well, kind of," said Ethan. "My headache was making my eyes water."

Cal shook his head. "You know, if there is something wrong, you can always tell me."

Ethan gave Cal one of his professional doctor-smiles. "I know, Cal. But I really am perfectly all right. Apart from the headache, which should very soon be gone. I'll just find a new lightbulb, then I'll go back to bed."

He stood up and washed the glass, but for once, he left it on the draining board. Cal let him get the lightbulb because he had no idea where they were and he thought it would be useful to know, but then he took the lightbulb from Ethan and pushed him firmly towards the sofa. "Ethan. Why were you really crying?"

"I wasn't," said Ethan, as he sat on the sofa.

"Is it Ariel?" said Cal.

Ethan closed his eyes and managed an almost-convincing sigh. "Cal, do we have to do this now? It's the middle of the night."

"There's nothing between Ariel and me," said Cal.

Ethan's eyes darkened. "I think there is! Two babies."

"Yeah. Yeah, obviously," said Cal, slightly hurt that Ethan thought he might have forgotten. "But there's no relationship."

"Are you sure that's how Ariel sees it?" said Ethan.

"Completely sure," said Cal. "I think she's great. A really lovely girl. I'm enjoying spending time with her."

Ethan blinked and just like that, his anger changed to sadness.

Cal put his hand on Ethan's arm. "But we are just friends, Nibbles. Maybe if things were different, I might have made a move, but apart from the fact we need to stay amicable if we're bringing two kids up, she's yours, Ethan. You saw her first."

"I didn't," said Ethan.

"Well, you know what I mean," said Cal. "I know you care about her and I'm not going to stand in your way. Ariel is my friend – but you're my brother."

He saw a flash of gratitude in Ethan's eyes, but then his expression became bleak again. "But if I wasn't in the picture, would you be interested?"

"It doesn't matter," said Cal. "She's off-limits so nothing's going to happen."

Ethan swallowed. "I appreciate it, Cal." He sounded sad. "I really do."

"Good," said Cal, and clapped Ethan on the shoulder, but then he looked at Ethan's face again and realised the conversation wasn't over.

"But I don't think that's fair," said Ethan. "I don't want you to hold back on my account. There's no point in all three of us being unhappy when it could be just me."

Cal stared at him. "Ethan, I would never steal your girl and there's no way I can be happy if you're not."

"No. Strange as it seems, I was the one who stole your girl," said Ethan, with a sad smile.

"It was just one night and I don't even remember it."

"You remember enough," said Ethan. "Whatever the connection was between you, it was strong enough for you both to break from your usual routine. Ariel liked you enough to break her rule of not having one-night stands."

Cal looked unhappy. "Yes, she did."

"And you, even after all this time; even though you can't actually remember how you felt, you said yourself that you thought she might be different," said Ethan. "You really seem to believe you meant to call her the next day. And I think that's because you did mean to. But you got hit on the head and you forgot."

"If you're right that it happened on that night," said Cal. "We haven't actually checked the dates. And I don't see how we can."

"Nothing easier," said Ethan. "You were treated at Holby, so the details should be in your file."

"But Ariel hasn't told us the date that we… met," said Cal.

"No, but if I'm right and she cares about you, she'll remember," said Ethan. "And if she remembers and the dates match up, I think you need to tell her."

Cal held his hands to his head. It was all moving so quickly – he'd started off by trying to reassure Ethan, and now Ethan was almost pushing him into Ariel's arms.

"We'll check the date at the hospital tomorrow," said Ethan.

"We could check the date of conception at the hospital as well," said Cal, but Ethan shook his head.

"We can't."

"Why not?"

"Because Ariel's not our patient and therefore we have no right to look at her file," said Ethan.

"Oh. Okay," said Cal. "If you say so."

Ethan glared at him. "Caleb, don't you even think about it. You are not going to look at Ariel's file."

"I heard you the first time," said Cal. "And I won't look. Of course I won't."


	33. Chapter 33

**CBloom2** , yes, we all know Cal and his promises very well! Poor Ethan. It is difficult writing about him when he's so heartbroken. Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , I think it would be scary to be standing on a chair when the lights went out, but the chances of it happening to anyone for real are probably very small. Do you think a ménage a trois involving two brothers would work? It's been done before! Thank you for your review.

* * *

The brothers arrived at work early the next day. There were a few looks of surprise, perhaps that Ethan had succeeded in waking Cal up in time to get him to work this early, but other than a bit of good-natured teasing, nobody made any comment.

Ethan seated himself in front of one of the computers. He considered reminding Cal that he wasn't meant to look at his own file, but decided that would be pointless. Nothing would make Cal go away now and Ethan felt it would be better to say as little as possible in case they were overheard.

In any case, Ethan wasn't really supposed to be looking at it either.

Ethan found Cal's online file and scanned through it. He quickly found the entry he thought they wanted and pointed to the date on it. Cal bent forward over Ethan's shoulder. Ethan watched him anxiously, aware that reading about an event of which you had no memory could be upsetting, but perhaps Cal was used to hearing about things he didn't remember.

"Yes, that would fit in with Ariel's pregnancy," he said, and there was a look of eagerness on his face that Ethan hadn't expected. But then Cal's smile disappeared and he frowned. "But I met Taylor on 6th December. So I already knew her when I met Ariel… though it took me a while to fall in love with Taylor. I was intrigued by Taylor when I met Ariel, but probably not in love with her."

Ethan felt a flash of anger. Convinced as he was that Ariel cared about Cal, it bothered him that Cal was talking about his ex. "You still remember the date when you met Taylor? Caleb, sometimes you don't know what today's date is. How on earth do you know that?"

Cal smiled sadly. "Some dates are etched forever on your mind, Ethan. Even after you've stopped caring. Do you remember the date when Dad left?"

Ethan nodded, his anger fading. "I suppose you're right. Some dates do stay in your mind."

"The dates when my life fell apart," sighed Cal.

Ethan put a sympathetic hand on Cal's arm and they sat in silence for a moment.

"But you don't still care for Taylor now, do you?" said Ethan, just to check.

"Of course not!" said Cal, shocked. "I know I didn't fall out of love with her as quickly as I should have done, but I don't feel anything for her now. I don't even hate her all that much!" His voice softened and he looked away. "Though I do hate what she made me do to you."

Ethan could have pointed out that she didn't hold a gun to his head. At one time, he probably would have said it. But it didn't seem to matter now. "Don't worry about that, Cal. You thought you were doing a good thing. And she was very clever."

Cal sighed and turned to look at Ethan. "I'll never be able to tell you how sorry I am."

Ethan put a gentle hand on his shoulder. "You don't need to, Cal. It's in the past. Let's think about the future. And someone's going to be a dad!"

He knew that would put the smile back on Cal's face and he was right.

* * *

Cal waited until Ethan was safely in Resus before he returned to the computer. He knew there was no real reason why he shouldn't ask Ariel for the date of the night when they'd met, but she'd want to know why and he didn't want to go into that. If she jumped to the same conclusion as he and Ethan had, she'd be horribly upset to think that he might have been attacked because of her. He didn't want to take the risk. He didn't ever want her to know about that, but particularly not now, when she was pregnant.

He found Ariel's online notes easily and sat in front of them, staring at her name on the screen. Ariel Hennessey. It was a nice name, he thought. Kind of pretty and fluffy like she was.

He wondered what name they'd give the babies. Presumably not Knight because he and Ariel weren't in a relationship (the thought gave him a pang and he tried not to think about why), but perhaps Hennessey-Knight was a possibility.

Ariel Hennessey-Knight. Caleb Hennessey-Knight.

Or just Ariel Knight…

No, this was crazy. Cal dragged his hands through his hair and silently laughed at himself. What was he even thinking? He didn't want to get married. He wasn't in love with Ariel. And if he was, he shouldn't be. She was Ethan's girl. It would be Ariel Hennessey-Hardy if it was anything. Or Ariel Hardy…

He felt a sharp pain as he realised he really didn't like the idea of Ariel marrying Ethan. Cal hated himself for it because he wanted Ethan to be happy and he thought Ariel was exactly the right kind of girl for him. But the fact remained, he didn't want her to marry Ethan.

Oh, why had that stupid man attacked him? Why had he been stupid enough to walk to work? If he'd got a taxi like a sensible person, he'd have arrived in the ED in one piece and still remembered Ariel. Then he could have supported her throughout her pregnancy and Ethan would have felt no obligation to look after her to make up for his jerk of a brother. Ethan wouldn't have spent so much time with her and he wouldn't have fallen in love with her and then everything might have been all right…

"Dr Knight. Are you using that computer or not?" It was Lily.

Cal looked at the screen again. It wouldn't take two seconds for him to scroll down and read the date. Then he would know and he could get out of Lily's way.

But he didn't.

He closed the window and stood up. "No, I'm finished now, Lily."

He turned and walked away.

He didn't know why. He felt his reasons for finding out this way were valid and he definitely believed that asking Ariel would be too problematic for him to consider it.

So why didn't he want to look?

He asked himself the question several times before he realised the truth.

He agreed with Ethan. He actually agreed with his little brother.

He didn't want to upset Ariel by asking her, but he also didn't want to go behind her back and look at things he had no right to look at. No matter what the future held for him and Ariel… no, make that Ethan and Ariel, Cal reminded himself hurriedly… she was family. They were related through the babies they'd created and through Ethan. He had no more right to look at Ariel's notes than he had to look at Ethan's.

Not that this had stopped him from looking at Ethan's notes on occasion, but… well, Cal had a feeling it might make him think twice about doing it in future.

He expected to feel annoyed with himself, but instead he felt something else. Something it took him a while to recognise.

He felt as though he'd done the right thing – and the knowledge made him happy.

* * *

Ethan was on his way outside with a much-needed cup of coffee when he met Cal.

"Going for a break?" said Cal cheerfully.

Ethan nodded. "It's not too cold out there, is it?"

"No, not at all," said Cal.

He smiled and started to walk past Ethan, but Ethan stopped him. "Do the dates match up?"

Cal turned to face him. "I don't know, Ethan. I didn't look."

"Seriously?" said Ethan doubtfully.

"Seriously," said Cal. "You were right. It wouldn't be fair. I'm going to try to find out from Ariel, but I'm not going to tell her why I want to know."

Ethan looked at him for a moment, trying to work out of Cal was telling the truth. He often didn't, after all. But there was a lightness about Cal that hadn't been there before and Ethan found he did believe him.

Cal laughed. "Even Caleb Knight does the right thing occasionally." He patted Ethan's arm and started to walk away.

"Wait," said Ethan.

"What's up?" Cal came back to his brother and looked at him, his eyes questioning.

"I think you should tell her what happened," said Ethan.

Cal stared at him for a moment. His eyes were wide with shock and it took him a few attempts to speak. "Of course I'm not going to tell her what happened!"

"I can understand why," said Ethan. "But I really think she'd want to know."

"Why would she want to know that?" said Cal. "I don't want her to start blaming herself!"

"Then don't tell her that it might be the guy who was bothering her," said Ethan. "It's only guesswork on our part anyway. Don't tell her you were found outside the club where you met her – that's guesswork too because you can't remember where you met her. Just tell her you had an accident and injured your head on 12th December last year and you were wondering if that was the night you met."

Cal shook his head, confused. "What difference will that make to Ariel?"

"It might give her more confidence that you meant it when you said you'd call her," said Ethan.

"And that's important to Ariel because…?"

Ethan couldn't say it. He knew it would hurt him and seeing as Cal was so insistent that Ethan and Ariel belonged together, it wouldn't increase the chance of Cal's telling her. "I just think it's a good idea to be as honest as possible. Okay?"

"Okay," said Cal thoughtfully.

This time, Ethan let him go. He couldn't have done anything else. He walked out of the hospital as quickly as he could and was almost at the bench when his tears started falling.


	34. Chapter 34

**Gillian Kearney Fan** , thank you for your review - I'm glad you enjoyed the last chapter.

 **Tanith Panic** , Cal was originally going to look at Ariel's records, but then I decided that as he's starting to grow up a bit, I'd let him do the right thing for a change. Just this once! Thank you for your review.

* * *

Ethan didn't cry for long. He was at work and it wouldn't inspire the confidence of the patients to be treated by a red-eyed doctor. But as he sat there, sniffing slightly in between sips of coffee, he felt unutterably sad.

He'd thought a break might help, but all he wanted now was to get back to work. Work was his best distraction, even though every pregnant patient and happy couple (not that many of those seemed to visit the ED) broke his heart.

"Hey," said a voice, and Ethan looked up to see Lofty.

"Hey," he said, and tried to smile without looking too encouraging.

Lofty sat beside him. He looked at Ethan for a moment and Ethan felt as though he was seeing right inside him, but it was in no way intrusive. It was comforting. Lofty's face lit with empathy, his eyes reflecting both Ethan's pain and a strong desire to help. "What's wrong, Ethan?"

Ethan wasn't going to tell him, but then he heard his own voice. "The girl I love is having twins with Cal."

Lofty's eyes were a rich, deep blue, but there was something so gentle about them. "Do you know how she feels?"

"I don't know," said Ethan sadly. "She liked Cal at first and I think he actually meant to call her, but he got amnesia and forgot about her. I met her when she was a patient in the hospital and I helped her avoid Cal and we became friends. Then we became more than friends. But she found out I'd lied to her about Cal – I pretended he wasn't my brother – and now she won't speak to me. Is it me or does that sound like the plot of a bad novel?"

Lofty smiled. "Stranger things have happened in Holby." He paused and his face became serious again. "I'm sorry, Ethan. About… everything."

Anyone might have said that, but Ethan knew Lofty really meant it.

"It sounds like she's feeling very vulnerable at the moment," said Lofty. "Sometimes, when something bad happens, people only want a small group of people around them. But it's not always a situation that lasts."

Ethan had some more coffee. "I'm hoping it won't. I mean, I'd like to know my niece and nephew, even if they'll never be my stepchildren… actually, maybe this is for the best. The poor children are going to have a terrible time drawing their family trees." He laughed and another tear fell.

"How does Cal feel about the babies?" said Lofty.

"He loves them," whispered Ethan. "He's so excited." He took his glasses off so he could wipe his eyes. "I've seen the look on his face when he talks about her. Not just the babies: _her_. And she really likes him. She always did: she just didn't believe it could work out with him and I was right there and she was grateful to me… but I lied to her and now she's got Cal back and I need to find some way of dealing with that or I don't know what I'm going to do."

* * *

Cal knew Ethan was upset.

He tried to hide it, but Cal knew. He saw that Ethan had been crying when he came back from his break. He noticed the concerned way Lofty kept looking at him throughout the shift. Cal wished he could convince himself that Ethan was sad about something else, but he couldn't.

Ethan loved Ariel.

Cal wasn't sure what to do. He needed to speak to Ariel about Ethan and clear his name somehow. To explain that Ethan's intentions were good; that his little brother would never want to hurt anyone.

But something held him back. It was partly that Ariel was so reluctant to talk about Ethan. The last thing he wanted was to upset her. Cal didn't know what would happen if she pushed him away as she had Ethan.

It was possible that would be the one thing to send her back into Ethan's arms. She was frightened and alone and desperately needed someone to hold on to. When she'd needed help, she'd contacted the one person who had shown signs of caring about her. When he'd betrayed her, she'd again turned to the person who'd offered help. So if Cal upset her, she might go back to Ethan.

Cal wasn't altogether sure how he felt about that. Ariel had technically been using his brother and might be using him now. But emotions could be difficult to decipher, including your own. It was possible to love someone, or feel an emotion similar to love, for so many different reasons. Cal could imagine how Ariel's gratitude towards Ethan could have been interpreted as a kind of love. And if she found Ethan attractive as well…

Cal didn't like the idea of Ariel fancying Ethan, but it wouldn't be the first time someone had been attracted to both brothers. Although different in personality and not all that similar in looks, a lot of girls had liked one brother first before moving on to the other (not that Ethan ever noticed). Lily had liked both of them (though mostly Ethan). So had the nurse from their mother's hospice. Ariel could very easily be another.

Cal thought of how unhappy Ethan was at the moment. How he'd cried when Ariel had walked away from him. How he still cried, secretly, without realising Cal knew about it. Cal wanted Ethan to be happy and perhaps the only way of ensuring that was to get him and Ariel back together.

But the more Cal thought about that idea, the less he liked it.

* * *

Ariel's face lit up when she opened the door to see Cal. "Hi. How was your shift?"

"It was okay," said Cal. He'd spent the whole journey to her flat agonising over whether he should put in a good word for Ethan or not, but he'd decided there was something more important he needed to do first. "A few time-wasters as usual, but no-one actually threw up on me so I call that a good day!"

Ariel laughed and went to make him a coffee, quickly but sweetly refusing his offer to make it himself.

"Did you have a good day?" asked Cal, once the coffee was made.

"Pretty good," said Ariel. "I'm getting really excited now. About the babies, I mean."

Cal pouted. "And there I was, thinking you were excited about seeing me."

Ariel looked worried, but then she realised he was joking and laughed. "I know the twins are excited about meeting you. I was actually thinking about names today. I'd really like two names that begin with the same letter. So I was going through the alphabet and picking out my favourites."

"How about.. Caleb and Chloe?" said Cal.

"Those are nice names," said Ariel. "But I do think it must be confusing when a child has the same name as one of their parents."

Cal grinned mischievously. "Or we could carry on the family tradition. How about Belle and Benjamin? Jasmine and Jackson? Rapunzel and Ryan?"

"I don't think so," said Ariel, with a wry smile.

"Or we could go the other way," said Cal. "How about Fairy and Persil?"

"I think I prefer Rapunzel!" said Ariel.

Cal smiled. "Or how out we go all Shakespearean. Miranda and Caliban?"

"Miranda is okay, but if we call the boy Caliban, we'll end up with two Cals," said Ariel. "I was thinking maybe Liam and Lucy. Or Sophia and Sebastian. Or Amelia and Alexander."

"Yeah, some good choices there," said Cal. "Liam… I bet I know why you like that one! We should probably write them all down."

Ariel found some paper and they noted down suggestions, alternately thinking of sensible choices and outlandish ones. Cal hadn't laughed so much for a long time.

But he didn't lose sight of the question he really needed to ask.

"Okay," he said once he'd come back from making himself another coffee and Ariel a strawberry milkshake. "I really need to ask you something and I hope it won't upset you. It relates to little Horatius and Hepzibah."

Ariel had looked worried at first, but her frown gave way to a smile. "They're you're babies too, Cal. You can ask me anything you like about Zachariah and Zerelda."

"Okay," said Cal. "I was just wondering something. The date on which Claudius and Cleopatra were conceived. I don't suppose it happened on 111th December?"

Ariel stared at him. "How do you know that?" She grabbed his arm. "Oh, Cal, are you saying you've remembered?"

"I'm afraid not," said Cal, with genuine regret. "But on the morning of 12th December, I injured my head. Apparently I wasn't looking where I was going and I ended up in the road."

Ariel gasped.

Cal stroked her hand, trying to reassure her. "The injury itself wasn't that serious, but I suffered amnesia and wasn't able to tell the doctors what happened. I was taken to hospital and diagnosed with concussion." He looked into her eyes. "I still don't remember anything about what happened that night. But I think that could be the answer to how I could have forgotten everything when I wasn't drunk."

"It must be!" said Ariel. "That was the date, Cal. My official date of conception was a couple of weeks before – I'm sure you know how due dates work – but that was the date when it happened."

Cal nodded, realising that even if he had looked up her date of conception, it wouldn't have told him the truth. "So, that's what happened. I can't tell you if I meant it when I said I'd call, but I think there's a good chance I did. It was around that time that I started thinking about long-term relationships. I did get into a completely disastrous long-term relationship after I met you – she was a con-artist – but I've only had a couple of one-night stands since and… I don't know. It's just not what I want anymore."

"Do you know what you do want?" Ariel asked the question as though it was very important to her.

"I don't know yet," admitted Cal. "I'm still a bit... 'once bitten, twice shy', I suppose." He put his hand gently on her bump. "But one thing I do know is that I do want these babies. I've never even thought about being a dad before and it did freak me out at first. After my experience with Taylor – the con-artist – I have a difficult time trusting anyone. But now… it's the most exciting thing that's ever happened to me and I just can't wait!"


	35. Chapter 35

**Bonnie Sveen Fan** , thank you for your review. I think Cal deserves a bit of happiness!

 **Tanith Panic** , Caliban is my favourite character in The Tempest! And not because of the first three letters. I really feel for the poor guy! There's a good chance Lofty will appear in this story again... thank you for your review.

* * *

Cal kept his arm around Ariel as he steered her through the crowds outside the O2, smiling in alternate amusement and delight at the sheer joy on her face. He had been worried that even seeing her favourite band wouldn't give her much of a respite from her current situation and the difficulties that lay ahead, but he'd never seen her happier.

At least, only in the silent, fleeting memories that could so easily be his imagination.

"I can't believe I've met One Direction!" Ariel almost squealed as she almost danced along the pavement.

Cal smiled and hugged her. "Well, you have – and they loved you. And do you know something even more exciting?"

"What?"

"You're going to see the whole concert again tomorrow night!"

Ariel screamed (much as she'd done all the way through the concert, to Cal's amusement) and threw her arms around him.

Ariel had kept quiet about the fact she already had a ticket to see a different performance at the O2, but when Cal had told her he was going to book train tickets there and back, as well as a hotel, Ariel had confessed. She'd really seemed to think Cal would be annoyed with her, but he wasn't. He knew that to Ariel, two tickets meant twice the fun (just like two babies) and Cal was very happy to ensure she would have two brilliant nights out.

His role in the second concert would consist solely of making sure she got there safely and picking her up afterwards, but although Cal had enjoyed the concert more than he was expecting, he really was more than happy not to see it again.

He'd already planned to spend the evening shopping. He and Ariel had gone to look at baby clothes and furniture today. They'd bought a few small things and Cal had silently taken note of all the larger things she'd looked at longingly and left alone. To buy them all would be a big strain on his bank account – never before had Cal regretted being so bad at saving his money – but he thought he could manage two or three of them without needing to borrow from Ethan. It would be worth it to see the look on Ariel's beautiful face… not to mention the look on the twins' beautiful faces.

The seats Rocker had got for them were much better than the cheap ticket Ariel had bought. Cal had told Iain to make it very clear to Rocker that Ariel needed to sit down throughout the concert and he'd got them front-row seats - next to the aisle, just in case "seeing One Direction live sends her into early labour." Cal had wanted to tear strips off him for saying that, but he'd thought it better to appear as grateful as possible. After all, there would be other tours and other concerts and it was worth keeping Rocker's friendship to make Ariel happy.

"I met One Direction!" said Ariel as they walked along the road. "I met One Direction! I met One Direction!"

" _And that's what's made you beautiful,_ " sang Cal teasingly. "I mean, um, not that you weren't beautiful before. And sorry for the singing. I don't think I'd be much of a replacement for Zayn."

Ariel laughed, completely unoffended, and hugged him again. Cal hugged her back, feeling almost as excited as she was. He'd enjoyed the concert a lot more than he'd expected considering it wasn't really his type of music – but the best thing of all had been the look on Ariel's face. Although he couldn't say it was his type of music, he'd loved watching the happiness on her face and knowing he'd helped to put it there.

"I had an idea," said Cal, once they were in a taxi on their way back to the hotel.

"What kind of idea?" said Ariel.

"Baby names," said Cal, grinning widely, as he always did when he thought of his beautiful babies. "How about… Liam Niall and Louisa Harriet?"

"Oh, that's perfect!" said Ariel. "And Liam and Louisa begin with the same letter too!" She became serious. "But do you like those names? I want you to like their names too."

Cal smiled. "Well, there is a reason why Niall and Harriet are the second names, but I'd be more than happy with those choices. I do like Liam and Louisa a lot."

Ariel's hands rested tenderly on her bump. "What do you think of that then, my beautiful babies? Would you like to be named after the best band in the world? _Who I just met!_ "

"I'm sure they'll love it," said Cal, "for the first ten years or so. Then they'll get all hormonal and embarrassed by it, but we'll keep on telling the story of their names to everyone they meet. And they'll stand there, rolling their eyes and gritting their teeth…"

"And swearing they'll never speak to us again!" said Ariel.

"But they'll forgive us eventually," said Cal. "Until they get engaged and we show their partners all the embarrassing photos we've got of them in the bath."

"Well, of course," said Ariel. "That's the law, isn't it?"

"So, have you got any embarrassing pictures of yourself in the bath?"

Ariel looked a bit shocked and Cal quickly went back over what he'd said, trying to work out what was wrong with it.

He was horrified when he realised. "Ariel, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean… I meant baby photos. I won't blame you if you don't believe me, but I was just thinking I hadn't seen your baby photos and obviously with your… I didn't want to mention your parents so I was trying very hard to avoid that and I wasn't paying attention to the rest of the sentence and… I'm sorry."

By the time he'd finished, Ariel was laughing. "It's okay, Cal. I can see how it happened and it was sweet of you not to want to upset me. But the answer to your question is that maybe I have and maybe I haven't! And I'm not even going to joke about asking to see pictures of you in the bath. For one thing, you've probably got hundreds of them, all featuring a different girl! I know what you're like, Caleb Knight."

"Ariel. I'm not like that anymore," said Cal seriously.

Ariel looked at him for a moment. The teasing look vanished from her face and was replaced by a slow smile. "No," said Ariel softly. "I really do think you're probably not."

* * *

Cal had booked them single rooms next to each other. He hadn't missed the look of relief on Ariel's face when they'd been given two keys, but he hadn't commented on it. To him, it had been obvious that they'd need two rooms. He and Ariel weren't a couple and they hadn't known each other long enough to share rooms as friends.

But he couldn't help wishing, as they entered the hotel and made their way towards the lift, that they were sharing a room. And a bed.

And a life…

"Oh, Cal, I had the most amazing time," said Ariel, once she'd pressed the button to send the lift up to their floor. "Thank you so much for arranging all this for me. And for coming with me. I'm so grateful." She flung her arms around him and kissed him.

She was probably going for his cheek. Cal would have been perfectly happy with a cheek-kiss. But he must have moved his head without meaning to because her lips found his and then they were kissing, their arms wrapped around each other and their bodies pressed as closely together as bodies can be when there are two babies in the middle.

"Oh, Ariel…" murmured Cal when their lips had parted and they stood slightly apart, both of them breathing hard.

"Yes?" said Ariel, as her eyes met his. There was fear in them, but she didn't look away.

If she was feeling anything like Cal, she probably couldn't look away.

"That was… that was…" panted Cal.

The lift doors opened. Slowly, they walked down the corridor, avoiding one another's eyes, but when they stopped outside Ariel's room, their eyes met again.

Cal reached out his hand and cupped her face, letting his thumb brush across her lips. Heat flowed through him and he bent his head to hers again. He knew it wasn't necessarily the right thing to do. He had a feeling there was a very good reason why he shouldn't be doing this. But he couldn't help himself.

Her lips tasted so sweet. At first, they kissed slowly, wonderingly, as though they could hardly believe it was happening. Then, with a moan, Cal caught her in his arms and kissed her passionately, his hands roaming over her back as hers raked through his hair.

At last they stopped and looked at one another. Ariel's lips looked red and swollen, but her eyes were sparkling. Cal couldn't begin to imagine what he looked like. He'd never felt so amazed and shocked in all his life.

"I… forgot… _that_?" he said.

"It wasn't your fault," said Ariel.

"But that was… that was…" Cal held out his arms to her again and she stepped towards him willingly, but this time he just hugged her, holding her head against his cheek. His other hand stroked her bump. The babies they'd created together.

"I know," whispered Ariel, her arms around his waist.

"I _would_ have called, Ariel," said Cal, his voice rough with emotion. "If I'd remembered, I would have called."

"I know," said Ariel again.

They stood there for a moment. Cal could feel his heart beating. He didn't know what to do or what to think… but he knew this was right. And he knew he mustn't forget again.

"So what now?" said Ariel.

Cal turned her to face him. There were lots of things he wanted to do now – but they would have to wait. "Now, beautiful, we both need to sleep. I'm sure you must be tired, though you don't look it. You look amazing." He sighed. "So we'll go to bed in our own rooms and then tomorrow, we'll talk. As much as you like."

"Just talk?" said Ariel.

Cal kissed her. "Well, not _just_ talking. But we can't do everything. You're eight months pregnant with our twins. It's a high-risk pregnancy. We'll discuss it properly tomorrow, but I don't want to do anything that might put you and the babies at risk."

* * *

It wasn't until Cal was lying alone in his bed with the biggest smile on his face that he finally realised the problem.

Ethan.


	36. Chapter 36

**Gillian Kearney Fan** , thank you for your review. I'm glad you think Cal and Ariel are cute.

 **ETWentHome** , it's an impossible situation. For once, Cal really wants to do the right thing, but whatever he does, it's going to hurt someone he cares about. I know what I think he should do, but that doesn't mean Cal will do it! Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , yes, it's a dream for Ariel and a nightmare for Ethan and probably a bit of both for Cal! I probably don't write many feelgood chapters because I love drama, but I'm glad you like them when they happen! Thank you for your review.

* * *

Ethan closed his eyes and pressed his aching forehead against the wall. He wished Cal was here. If Cal was here, he wouldn't be with Ariel – and he'd be able to give Ethan another of those head massages.

"Dr Hardy, is there a problem?"

It was Connie's voice. Ethan reluctantly opened his eyes and turned to face her. "I'm fine, Mrs Beauchamp."

"Another headache?" said Connie shrewdly. "It's probably just the stress, but we'll keep an eye on them. You'd better go and take a break. If the pain hasn't eased in fifteen minutes, come and find me."

"I really am all right," said Ethan. "I mean, yes, Mrs Beauchamp. I'll do that. Thank you."

Connie touched his arm briefly. "Someone has to look out for you, Dr Hardy. There aren't many doctors who are able to look out for themselves."

* * *

Ethan got himself a coffee and decided to go outside, thinking the fresh air might do more for his headache than the staff room. He left the hospital and looked around for an empty seat, but then he saw someone crouched in the car park, screaming. Ethan put his coffee down beside the entrance and hurried over.

"Hi, I'm Dr Hardy." Ethan knelt down beside the woman. She was panting and even in her crouched position, Ethan could see her large stomach.

"I think I'm in labour," she panted. "I came as quickly as I could, but I think the baby's coming!" Her body seemed to relax slightly as the contraction ended.

"Don't worry. You're in the right place," said Ethan reassuringly.

She looked at him. "In the middle of the car park?"

Ethan felt embarrassed. "Well, not quite literally the right place, but help is near at hand. I'm Dr Hardy."

"Yeah, you said."

"Oh. I'm sorry," said Ethan. "Can you tell me your name?"

"Nerissa."

"Okay, Nerissa: you're how many weeks pregnant?"

"I think it's thirty-eight, but it's twins. They said they often come early."

Ethan closed his eyes tightly for a moment. Why did it always have to be twins? "Have your waters broken?"

"I think so," said Nerissa. "They're my first babies and I'm all alone, so I don't know. I don't know anything!"

Ethan put his hand on her arm. "It's okay, Nerissa. It's natural to be nervous. I'm sure I would be absolutely terrified if it was me. How far apart are your contractions?"

"I don't know!" wailed Nerissa.

"Don't worry. We can work that out easily enough," said Ethan. "Is there anyone I can call for you? The baby's dad?"

Nerissa's hands went protectively to her stomach. "I don't want him anywhere near them. I haven't seen him since the night of conception. He said he'd call, but I never heard from him again."

Ethan was having trouble breathing now too. It could not be happening again. There were plenty of men who behaved like Cal. There was no reason to assume that Cal had two sets of twins about to come into the world. That would be possible but highly unlikely. "Okay, who's your birthing partner? Would you like me to-"

"Oh my God!" shrieked Nerissa. "It's coming out! It's coming out!"

Ethan put his arm around her. "It's all right, Nerissa. Try to breathe for me." He looked at the puddle beginning to form around her feet. "Your waters have broken. That's all."

"Do they do that twice then? Once for each twin?" said Nerissa. "But the first time wasn't like this!"

"I would think the first time was something called a show," said Ethan. This should all have been explained to her, of course, but he couldn't blame her for being in too much of a panic to remember. "It must be very frightening, but it's all perfectly normal. Now, we need to get you to maternity. Do you think you can stand up?"

Nerissa shook her head. "I can't move. My back hurts. And I need a wee!"

"Yes, it's not very pleasant for you, but that's quite normal too," said Ethan. "I'm going to call maternity and see what they say. Don't worry: I'm not going to leave you."

"You'd be the first man who didn't," said Nerissa.

Ethan wasn't sure what to say to that, but he was spared having to answer when Nerissa started screaming. "It's okay. You're going to be fine. Do you remember the breathing exercises they taught you in your antenatal classes? We'll do those now. Don't worry. I'll help you."

* * *

Cal was in the place he most wanted to be, but not for the usual reason. They sat on Ariel's bed together, his arm around her. He'd already asked her a million times if she was comfortable, but Ariel had assured him she was fine and promised to tell him if that ever changed.

Cal put his hand on the bump again. "Hey, Liam and Louisa. Are you two okay there? It's your daddy again." He felt a kick against his hand and smiled. "Is that you, Liam? Are you going to be a footballer then? Earn lots of money? Have lots of pretty girlfriends?"

"Maybe Louisa is going to be a footballer and earn lots of money and have lots of pretty girlfriends!" said Ariel.

Cal bent down and kissed each side of the bump. "Mummy's right. Don't listen to Daddy. You do whatever makes you happy and Daddy will be very proud." He smiled. "But I do hope at least one of you will be into football so we can go to matches together."

"Not that I'm trying to be difficult or anything," said Ariel, "but maybe I'd like to go to matches too."

Cal looked at her in surprise. "Really? That's great! I won't take you before the birth because I don't want you getting overexcited, but as soon the babies are okay to be left with Uncle Ethan, I can take you to all the matches you want!"

He thought that would make her happy, but a cloud settled over her face. "I suppose Ethan will have to be part of my life."

"He's my brother," said Cal, as gently as he could. "You don't have to see him often if you don't want to, but he honestly does feel awful. He really cares about you and he thought he was doing the right thing. He'd never want to hurt anyone and he's miles more trustworthy than I am. He really is one of the good guys and he's always there for me, no matter how much of an idiot I'm being."

Ariel looked away. "But he brought me into your house, Cal. Knowing how I felt about you. Did he honestly think he'd get away with it?"

"He thought you'd be gone long before I resurfaced," said Cal, with a sigh. "He didn't know what else to do. He could see you were upset and he didn't want you to be alone, so he couldn't send you to a hotel. But he couldn't really go and stay in the hotel with you: that would look a bit presumptuous and you might not have been able to get two single rooms at such short notice."

Ariel sighed. "Why did he kiss me, Cal?"

Cal wished she hadn't asked that, but he had to answer. He couldn't lie to her.

He turned her face towards him. "Because he loves you, Ariel. And I don't know what to do about that because I think I love you too."

* * *

Ethan knew he should forget about her. Once he'd delivered Nerissa to maternity, she was no longer his responsibility. It was his current patients who mattered.

But it bothered him that the baby's father had abandoned her and he couldn't help being afraid of what that might mean.

He phoned maternity between patients. They were reluctant to tell him anything at first, but when Ethan said he needed to write a report of the incident and wanted to be sure of the facts he hadn't been able to ascertain himself due to a lack of equipment, they became a bit more co-operative.

He was informed that Nerissa had given birth to two healthy babies with no complications. Ethan wrote down a few unnecessary facts in his notebook, thanked the lady for her assistance, and turned to find Connie right behind him.

Ethan looked at her uneasily, wondering how long she'd been there.

"Ethan, was that Ariel you were enquiring after or the patient you helped out in the car park?"

For a horrible moment, Ethan thought of seizing the excuse, but fortunately, sanity returned. "The patient I helped in the car park."

Connie spoke gently. "Then it's really none of your concern, Ethan. You delivered her to maternity. You've done your job. Now it's time to move on."

"She hasn't seen the father since the conception," said Ethan in a low voice. "He promised to call, but he never did. I thought…"

"…that it might be Cal?" Connie touched his arm and waited till he was looking at her. "And what would you do if it was?"

Ethan dropped his gaze again. "I don't know," he admitted.

"Ethan, even if the father is Cal, you're not responsible in any way," said Connie. "You're not responsible for anything Cal does. You've got to stop thinking you are. You don't owe these women anything and you don't have to make up for Cal's mistakes. You have your own life, Ethan, and that's what you need to think about – once you've finished your shift, that is."

Ethan gave a small smile. "I'm sorry. I'll get back to work. I won't bother maternity anymore."

Connie looked at him assessingly. "Do you think you're ready to get back to work?"

"Yes. Yes, I am," said Ethan. "I'm sorry, Mrs Beauchamp. You're right. I need to focus on my own life and my own patients."

"Okay," said Connie. "But be responsible, Ethan. Look after yourself in the way you look after Cal. If you feel yourself struggling, take a break. If it keeps happening, come and speak to me. Do I make myself clear, Dr Hardy?"

"Very clear," said Ethan. "Thank you, Mrs Beauchamp."


	37. Chapter 37

**ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. Things are definitely tricky! There are twins everywhere, but only one Ariel. I know I'd have trouble choosing between Cal and Ethan!

 **Gillian Kearney Fan** , it would probably look a bit odd if Ethan did go to see Nerissa's twins, but he's not thinking very clearly, so he might do! Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , thank you for your review. I think a lot of Connie's bossiness is being caring in disguise! I hope you won't be disappointed with Ariel's choice, when she makes it.

* * *

Robyn poked her head out of a cubicle and looked relieved to see Ethan. "Ethan, have you got a minute?"

"Yes, of course," said Ethan, and stopped, trying to push all thoughts of Ariel and Nerissa and responsibilities out of his mind. "How can I help?"

Robyn came out of the cubicle and spoke softly to Ethan. "I've got quite an interesting case here and I don't know what to do. Dylan was in here a minute ago and he gave his opinion, and to be fair, he was dealing with the medical problem, which is his job. But… well…. I think it's a bit more complicated than that and I thought you might understand?"

Ethan ran his mind through the patients he was already seeing and decided he'd be okay to look at one more. "Of course, Robyn," he said sadly. "I'd be happy to help."

Robyn's eyes filled with concern. "Ethan, are you okay?"

"Yes. Of course. Never better." Ethan pasted a smile on his face and walked into the cubicle before Robyn could probe any further. There was a girl of about seven lying on the bed, crying. A boy of a similar age was standing beside her, holding her hand and also crying. A woman, presumably their mother, had an arm around each of them. Ethan smiled at them all. "Hi. My name's Ethan. I'm a doctor. How can I help?"

"Dr Hardy, this is Tanya," said Robyn. "She fell over whilst ice-skating and has a closed distal radial fracture to the left wrist."

"Hi, Tanya. I'm sorry to hear that," said Ethan. "I wish I could ice-skate. It always looks like so much fun."

Robyn gestured towards the boy. "And this is Ryan, Tanya's twin brother and ice-skating partner."

 _Twin_ brother?

And these twins didn't have a father in evidence either.

It took all Ethan's strength not to run out of the cubicle. "Hi, Ryan. It's nice to meet you. Have you hurt yourself too?"

Ryan looked as though he didn't know the correct answer to that.

"Ryan isn't injured," said Robyn, "but he and Tanya have a sort of psychic connection so when one of them is hurt, the other one feels it too. Their mum, Bryony," Robyn gestured politely in her direction, "is aware this is very unusual, but she confirms it seems to be the case even when the twins are in completely different places. So they're both in pain, but Dr Keogh doesn't really... he doesn't see Ryan as his patient."

Ethan nodded. "So Tanya is being treated and not Ryan, even though he's also in severe pain."

"I don't think Dr Keogh believes it, to be honest," said Robyn. "Which actually shocked me a little bit as he believes all kinds of…" She stopped. "Anyway, he doesn't believe it. He says, even if it is true, treating Tanya will help Ryan's pain too, and he's probably right, but in the meantime, we've got two very distressed twins."

"Yes, I can see that," said Ethan. He still wanted to run away, but he knew he couldn't. "I'm sorry you're both in pain. Ryan, why don't you sit on the bed with your sister?"

He didn't miss the way both twins looked slightly relieved at that.

"Thank you, Dr Hardy," said Bryony. "They were both on the bed before, but Dr Keogh…"

"Well, I'm here now," said Ethan. He turned to Bryony. "I'm afraid that, for ethical reasons, we won't be able to give Ryan pain relief, even though he is experiencing genuine pain, but I will do everything I can to ensure he's kept comfortable. Would you say that, when the bone is set, it would distress him more to watch it happening or to be away from Tanya?"

"It would definitely distress him more to be away from Tanya," said Bryony. "He'll feel all the pain she's feeling, but at least if he's with her, he'll know why."

Ethan nodded. "That makes perfect sense to me. Robyn, we'll need another nurse to comfort Ryan while you're comforting Tanya – unless you'd like to do it the other way round, of course. Perhaps Lofty?"

Robyn nodded eagerly. "Yes, I think Lofty would definitely understand."

"I'll go and find him," said Ethan. "In the meantime, Robyn, could you help Tanya and Ryan to hold their arms in a way that causes them the least pain?"

"Yes, of course," said Robyn, smiling at them. "They were doing it when they came in, but obviously, they're a bit upset now."

"Of course," said Ethan sympathetically. "Ryan, I'm afraid we won't be able to put your arm in a cast – we can't do that unless there's an actual physical break. But perhaps we could manage a support bandage of a similar shape that can be written on in pen, and identical slings, of course?"

"I'm sure that can be arranged, Dr Hardy!" said Robyn.

Ethan smiled. "Excellent. I'll speak to Lofty about it when I see him." He smiled at the twins. "I can see you're both in pain, so I'll try to hurry things along as much as I can. I'll see you both later - and Robyn, if Dr Keogh comes back, please could you explain that I'm treating the patients now? If there are any problems, I'm very happy to speak to him."

* * *

Ariel stared at Cal as though she couldn't believe what he'd said. "You love me?"

"I think so," said Cal. "Yeah. I do."

Ariel shook her head. "But you hardly know me."

"I know you well enough," said Cal. "I know my life was a mess without you. There was something missing. Three things missing. And now I've found you all and everything feels right."

"But how can you be sure?" wailed Ariel. "I want it to be true, Cal. I want it so much. But you can't know. You can't possibly know. So I can't let myself believe it."

Cal wanted to comfort her and hold her close and reassure her, but he knew she was right. He couldn't prove anything now. Only time could do that.

"And, oh God, Ethan loves me too?" Ariel started to laugh, but it was high and hysterical. "That makes slightly more sense because he did spend more time with you and love makes you do silly things. But I don't want to believe that because then…"

Cal caught her by the shoulders and kissed her firmly. When he'd finished, she just looked at him, breathing shallowly. Cal loosened his hold on her and moved slowly away, relieved she was calmer now. "Don't worry about our feelings. They don't matter for now. What are your feelings, Ariel? Do you care abouteither of us?"

Ariel was silent while she thought. Her hands moved over her bump, but Cal was sure it was absent-minded. His heart thumped with fear at what her reply might be, but he knew he had to wait. He would wait as long as it took for her to find an answer.

"I think I love you both," said Ariel at last.

It was Cal's turn to laugh, though he didn't know why. "You love both of us?"

"But not in the same way," said Ariel. "Ethan is lovely and I was so grateful to him. I loved him for what I did for me and I didn't think I'd ever find anyone I loved more. But then he betrayed my trust…"

"Believe me, he is beating himself up about that every minute," said Cal.

Ariel's eyes filled with tears. "But it wasn't just that, Cal. I wasn't just angry with him."

Cal's chest stabbed with pain. He reached out for her and held her tightly. "Is that when you realised, Ariel? Is that when you realised your feelings for Ethan were deeper than a friendly love?"

"No," said Ariel, her voice muffled by his top. "That was when I realised I still loved you. That there could never be anyone else. It wouldn't be fair to you, to me, and definitely not to Ethan. So I pushed him away." Her voice broke as she started crying. "I knew I'd used him. I also knew he'd betrayed me. But I concentrated on the betrayal; made it bigger than it should have been because I knew that if I forgave him, then I'd have to admit what I'd done."

Cal held her more tightly as she sobbed hard. "It's okay, darling. It's not your fault. You believed you wouldn't see me again and Ethan, as you say, is, um, really nice, and you did love him in a way. Turning him down seemed crazy. You listened to your head instead of to your heart – which is usually by far the most sensible thing you can do – and you let Ethan kiss you. It seemed to make sense to you at the time – and let's not forget how upset you must have been. You'd lost your keys. You were nearly eight months' pregnant. How anyone could expect you to think straight in that situation… A lot of people would have done as you did, Ariel. Accepted the love that was offered. But listen to me, beautiful. It's not like you and Ethan had a whole relationship – or even like you slept together. It was a few kisses at a very emotional time. Even if I'd stayed in bed like Ethan wanted, you might easily have come to the same conclusion soon afterwards: that Ethan wasn't the guy you wanted."

"But I used him," wept Ariel. "And now he loves me."

"That's not your fault," said Cal. "It just happened. It's very, very sad, but it's not your fault."

"I wish I could believe it's not real love," sobbed Ariel, as Cal rubbed circles on her back. "I wish I could say it's impossible to fall in love after such a small amount of time. But I know it is possible because I fell in love with you."

"And I fell in love with you," whispered Cal, as he rained kisses on her hair.

Ariel only cried harder. "But we can't be together, Cal. How can we? I tried to convince myself I hated Ethan. I tried to convince myself I didn't care if he was hurt. But I do care. How can we be together when it's going to break Ethan's heart?"


	38. Chapter 38

**Bonnie Sveen Fan** , I hadn't thought about a punch-up, but it would be very interesting! I'll certainly think about it. Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , I think there probably are doctors who don't appreciate Lofty's wonderful qualities, but I know Ethan would see them. It is sad for Ethan, but he almost always gets the girl in my stories! Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. I'm glad you understand Ariel's reasons for treating Ethan as she did. It's probably good she likes Ethan really or that would make things very awkward for Cal!

* * *

Ethan knocked on Connie's door and nervously awaited her response. It came quickly and to his relief, she didn't look too annoyed to see him.

She looked at him for a moment, perhaps trying to assess his mental state, but what she saw seemed to satisfy her. "Dr Hardy. Have a seat. I'll be two minutes."

Ethan sat down and focused his gaze on his hands as Connie worked on her computer.

"Right. Dr Hardy," said Connie. "How can I help you?"

Ethan put a hand into his pocket and drew out the money he'd counted out carefully. "I, um, I owe you some money for an elasticated bandage and a sling."

Connie looked slightly surprised, but then she lifted her hand. "It's all right, Ethan. I know that however careful you are, dressings do sometimes get damaged. But I appreciate your conscientiousness and honesty. It's very refreshing."

"No, they didn't get damaged," said Ethan awkwardly. "They were… perhaps I'd better explain from the beginning."

"As long as you don't start too far back, Dr Hardy, by all means," said Connie.

She listened attentively as Ethan explained about the psychic twins. He didn't dare meet her eyes too often, but he was encouraged by the fact she hadn't interrupted him yet, though it seemed too much to hope that Connie Beauchamp would believe in psychic abilities. It seemed far more likely that, in view of his recent problems, she'd decided to go easy on him because he was so much trouble when he fell apart.

"That's completely fine," said Connie, when Ethan had finished. "I would ask that you don't make a habit of it, and I will certainly accept your money if it's psychic octuplets next time, but it sounds to me as though you handled a difficult situation – which must have been particularly difficult for you – very well."

Ethan wondered if he'd heard correctly. "So it really is all right?"

"Of course it is," said Connie. "I do have trouble believing they're genuinely psychic, but from what you tell me, they were both genuinely distressed. Vulnerable patients do sometimes need a bit of extra care and thoughtfulness. It sounds as though you provided it."

"And you really don't feel that I've overstepped my boundaries?" said Ethan, just to make sure.

Connie arched an eyebrow. "The only thing you've done wrong, Dr Hardy, is not accepting my word the first time. I'm sure you know I'm not in the habit of saying things I don't mean."

"Oh. No. Of course not. Sorry."

Connie allowed him a small smile. "So: twins in the car park; twins in the cubicles. I think you've managed very well, Ethan, but how are you feeling?"

"I'm actually feeling all right," said Ethan, slightly surprised. "When I realised they were twins, I very nearly panicked, but fortunately, I didn't."

"Very fortunately," said Connie drily. "And I didn't tell you this, but when Nerissa met the father of her twins, he told her he'd just been sacked from his job as a toilet attendant. I can't imagine Dr Knight saying that, no matter how drunk he was." Se smiled. "So you can put your mind at rest on that score."

* * *

It should have been a happy day. Cal, Ariel and the twins explored London in the morning before enjoying a picnic in the Embankment Gardens. It was slightly chilly and Cal longed to put his arm around Ariel to protect her from the cold, but she'd said they couldn't be together and he could only accept that. He hoped that, in time, she might change her mind, but that was a decision for her to make, not him.

"What shall we do now?" asked Ariel, with sadness in her eyes despite the smile on her face.

Cal dredged up a smile too and went through the mental list of ideas he'd compiled last night. "How about Madame Taussauds?"

Ariel looked doubtful. "I don't know. I think waxworks are a bit creepy."

"Me too – but please don't tell anyone I said that. An art gallery?" was Cal's next suggestion..

"Not really me," said Ariel; "and I think not really you either."

Cal had to laugh. "You know me too well – though I would have put up with it for you. I'm guessing the British Museum is out too – that's full of mummies."

"Hey: what's wrong with mummies?" said Ariel, patting her bump proudly.

Cal smiled. "This particular mummy is gorgeous. I mean… um… anyway, the bandaged ones just don't do it for me. I don't know why they're so creepy. I really should be used to bandages in my job! But I'm not a fan. I remember going with Ethan once and he was fascinated!" He stopped and glanced at Ariel. Perhaps he shouldn't have mentioned Ethan.

"And you were terrified?" guessed Ariel. "And you didn't want your little brother to know, so you were swaggering around, acting all cool, but a nervous wreck inside?"

"That sounds about right!" said Cal. "So we'll give the mummies a miss. Is there anything you'd like to do?"

Ariel hesitated. "This probably sounds silly, but I've never been on the London Eye. And I'd really like to."

Cal hesitated. "Are you sure that's a good idea? With the twins and everything?"

"It's fine. I checked," said Ariel. "I can go on at my own risk. And I will have a qualified doctor with me."

"True," said Cal, wishing he felt slightly more comfortable with the idea - but he knew Ariel would probably be okay and he didn't really want to deny her anything.

"I'd also like to go to the Tower of London to see the crown jewels," said Ariel. "I did go once on a school trip. I liked the ravens and the beefeaters and talking about the Bloody Tower in a very loud voice, but we never got to see the crown jewels."

Cal regretfully decided against saying that if she wanted to see the crown jewels, he could always drop his trousers. That didn't seem like the right sort of thing to say to a girl like Ariel. Instead he said: "I was exactly the same when my parents took me to the Tower of London. I thought it was brilliant being allowed to swear in public without getting told off! Ethan was so funny: he just would not say the word 'Bloody' and did everything he could to avoid it, but I made him in the end."

Ariel looked sad. "Poor Ethan. He really is so sweet."

"He's okay," said Cal. "If you like that sort of thing. And he will get over you. I'm not sure I would, but Ethan will."

Their eyes locked, but then Ariel dragged her gaze away and returned to the original subject. "I'd also like to go to the Whispering Gallery in St Pauls Cathedral. To see if it's true about whispering. And I'd like to walk across Tower Bridge. And maybe have dinner at the top of the Post Office Tower."

Cal smiled. "I'm afraid the Post Office Tower restaurant is closed. It was open for a while a couple of months ago – I told Ethan I was going to take him there for his birthday, which was very mean of me considering he's terrified of heights, but I obviously wouldn't have done it. But London isn't short of places to have dinner. I'm sure we can find somewhere special. How does the Ritz sound?"

"Scary," admitted Ariel, with a smile. "But I'd love to go, Cal."

"Me too."

Cal had the feeling that, despite everything, it was going to be a lovely afternoon.

* * *

Ethan signed his name on Tanya's cast, then did the same with Ryan's bandage. This was more difficult to write on, but he didn't let that stop him. Soon they both had messages which (along with their names) said: _Hope you're back on the ice soon. Best wishes, Dr Ethan._ He let them call him just 'Ethan' as he did with almost all children, but he thought they might have a few friends called Ethan so he thought he should make it clearer which one he was.

Bryony (who called him 'Dr Hardy', along with almost all adults) thanked him warmly for his kindness and understanding. So did the twins' father when he eventually showed up. To Ethan's relief, he wasn't Cal. He worked in a town about an hour away by road so he hadn't been able to get there any sooner.

"It was really lovely to meet you all," said Ethan, shaking hands with all of them and only getting slightly embarrassed when he remembered Tanya and Ryan couldn't use their right hands. "I would say it would be lovely to see you again, but considering what my job is, I'm not sure that would be true."

"Aren't you going to take our casts off again when they're better?" said Tanya, pouting slightly in a way that reminded Ethan of Cal.

"No, I'm afraid that's the fracture clinic's job," said Ethan. "It's very sad. I hardly ever get to find out how my patients are doing because I always have to refer them to another doctor. But if you do happen to see me, you're welcome to come and say hello if I'm not busy saving someone's life."

"Do you have a twin, Ethan?" asked Ryan.

Ethan shook his head. "I don't. But…" He paused for a moment, gathering his courage. "My brother's, um… my brother's going to become a father to twins in a couple of months."

Tanya and Ryan started jumping up and down. Ethan doubted it did anything for their arms, but neither seemed to notice. "When are they going to be born, Ethan?"

"Are they boys or girls or both?"

"Do they have names yet?"

"Have you got a scan picture?"

Ethan thought sadly that even if they did have names, Cal probably wouldn't have told him. "They're due in two months. It's a boy and a girl, but they don't have names yet. I haven't seen a recent scan picture." Or any scan picture at all, but he didn't want Tanya and Ryan to suspect that his relationship with his niece and nephew was anything but normal.

"They might come early," said Tanya knowledgeably. "Twins often do."

"We were early," said Ryan.

"We're always early for ice-skating practice too," said Tanya.

"But not for bedtime," added Ryan.

Ethan laughed. "Bedtime is rather overrated, isn't it? One of my favourite things about being an adult is being able to stay up and read as late as I like." With due consideration for the time his shift started the next day, of course. "But don't worry if you need an early night tonight. It can be very tiring, being in pain."

Ethan knew that was true of emotional pain too. He'd been in a lot of it recently and he didn't doubt there would be more to come when he allowed himself to process everything that had happened today.


	39. Chapter 39

**Gillian Kearney Fan** , I'm glad Connie took the time to listen to Ethan. He really needed to talk and he couldn't talk to Cal! Thank you for your review.

* * *

Cal and Ariel sat on the London Eye, looking out over London. Ariel hadn't spoken to him for some time, but Cal knew she was enjoying herself. She had one hand on her bump and kept stroking or patting it, or looking down at it as she pointed out everything she could see to their babies.

"And that's the London Gherkin," said Ariel.

"That's not what I call it!" interjected Cal, with a cheeky smile.

Ariel was probably trying to give him a severe look, but she was smiling too much for him to take it seriously. "I hope you'll call it the Gherkin when Liam and Louisa are listening."

"Oh, yes, of course!" said Cal quickly. He moved closer to Ariel and put his hand on the bump too. "It's called the London Gherkin because it's green - which seems like a very good reason for not calling it after something that isn't green. Unless there's something very badly wrong with it."

Ariel pointed out a few more landmarks. Cal watched her face as he talked, enjoying the movement of her mouth and feeling a charge of eroticism whenever he got a sight of her tongue. He wished it was just the two of them – well, the four of them – in the capsule. It occurred to him that you could have a lot of fun on the London Eye if there were just two of you. Thirty minutes would be enough time for him, though lucky Ethan would have time to do it three times. With three different girls!

Not that you'd ever get Ethan on the second-largest Ferris wheel in the world.

"And that's St Paul's Cathedral – we went there today," said Ariel. "Do you remember the Whispering Gallery, where Daddy was whispering all those rude things I really hope you didn't understand? That was in St Paul's Cathedral."

"It wasn't rude!" said Cal. "I kept all the really rude things to myself." He smiled. "And there's the Tower of London, where the beefeater showed us his crown jewels."

"Cal!" said Ariel, but she was clearly trying not to laugh. Then she stopped laughing suddenly and put a hand to her stomach.

Cal panicked. "Oh my God: are you in labour? We won't get out of here for at least twenty-five minutes! What are we going to do?"

"It's okay. I'm sure our phones work," said Ariel. She was slightly hunched over, her hand pressed to her bump.

"But what are they going to do?" said Cal. "Whizz everyone round so we can get out? Can they even do that?"

"They would have to in an emergency," said Ariel. "But even if they don't, you've delivered a baby before." A look pf panic came over her face. "Haven't you?"

Cal found he was gripping her arm tightly. "Yes, but I haven't delivered my own baby before!" _At least, I don't think so…_

* * *

Ethan needed a break.

He didn't want to have a break. He didn't usually need a break. But even though the episodes with the two sets of twins had turned out well, he felt mentally and emotionally exhausted.

He stumbled out of a cubicle and crashed into someone. "I'm so sorry," he mumbled.

"Can't you watch where you're going, Dr Hardy?" said Lily angrily.

Ethan looked at the floor and discovered he'd made her drop a file. "I'm sorry," he said, and dropped his knees to pick it up for her.

Lily bent down to help him, her expression softening slightly. "Ethan, are you all right?"

"Never better," said Ethan. He put the file together and handed it to Lily once she'd stood up, but getting up suddenly seemed like so much work. He wondered if this was how Cal felt when he'd got depressed. If it was, he really ought to have been more sympathetic.

Or had he been sympathetic? Ethan couldn't remember. It seemed like such a long time ago.

 _But how can I get out of this?_ thought Ethan. _Becoming a father seemed to sort out Cal's depression, but where am I going to find a girl who wants to have a baby with me?_

"Come with me," said Lily, holding out her hand.

Ethan stared at her, wondering for a crazy moment if he'd spoken his thoughts aloud and Lily was offering… no, that would be ridiculous. He put his hand in Lily's and let her help him to his feet. "I don't want to take you away from your work."

"I am overdue for a break," said Lily.

It was probably true. Lily usually took her breaks late on if she took them at all. Ethan followed her to the staff room and went to sit down when she instructed him to.

Lily sat beside him. "What is wrong, Ethan? You haven't been yourself lately. Has something happened?"

"Yes," said Ethan softly. "But it's so silly."

"I think perhaps it isn't if it's upsetting you this month," said Lily. "Lots of people get upset over silly things. Ethan Hardy does not."

"You might be surprised," said Ethan with a shaky laugh that was far too close to a sob.

"Then surprise me," said Lily, in the tone of one who did not expect to be disobeyed.

Ethan found he didn't have the strength to disobey. He told Lily everything. He kept his gaze ahead of him, not wanting to see the derision that was more than likely to be on her face.

He hoped she wouldn't see the tears in his eyes either. Lily already knew how stupid he was. He didn't want her to know he was weak too.

* * *

Cal placed his hand on Ariel's stomach. It felt tight and hard. "Does it hurt a lot?" he asked sympathetically.

"It's weird," said Ariel. "I don't know if it actually hurts. But I can feel it. it feels weird, Cal. I don't like it. Oh, it's changing now."

Cal felt the muscles of the uterus relaxing. "And still no pain?"

"Not pain exactly, no."

"Okay." Cal sat up. "Has Tonya told you about Braxton-Hicks?"

Ariel stared at him. "Who's Tonya? Oh, you mean Toni? My obstetrician?"

"Yeah, that's who I mean," said Cal. "Has she mentioned false contractions, false labour – anything like that?"

"Oh, yes. Yes, she did. And it did have some weird double-barrelled name." Ariel seemed to relax slightly. "Do you think that's what's happening?"

Cal nodded. "Almost certainly, if you're not experiencing pain. If you do experience pain, I'd like you to let me know straight away."

Ariel giggled. "Oh, I'm sure I will. I'll probably scream!"

"That's okay." Cal told himself there was no further reason to worry, but he couldn't help it. He wanted her to be okay. He wanted his beautiful, precious little family to be okay. "Could you try walking around a bit? That should help prevent it from happening again."

"Is it bad then?"

"Not really bad –your uterus has actually been contracting throughout your pregnancy," said Cal. "You're noticing it now because it's so big." So big, with two tiny little bundles of life inside… that he helped to create…

Ariel touched his hand. "Cal, are you okay?"

Cal nodded. "Yeah. Sorry. I'm a bit emotional. I'm going to be a dad!"

Ariel reached across and hugged him.

Cal hugged her back, loving the feelings of her arms around him. "Shall we have a little walk then? Just for a few minutes. The view won't have changed much. We just need to calm the little ones down a bit first. They must have got overexcited." As a doctor, he knew that wasn't the explanation, but still he found themselves saying the words. He loved them and he wanted to interact with them and take every sign of life as a sign they were communicating with him.

Ariel nodded. Cal stood and offered her his hand and they walked slowly around the capsule together. After a few minutes of walking, they went to sit down again and continued to watch the view as the capsule continued its journey. As Cal was so tall, he stood behind Ariel, his hands resting on her shoulders and smiling as she pointed out landmarks to the babies, with Cal interjecting the occasional (usually slightly rude) comment. This made Ariel turn around and tell him off, but she couldn't stop smiling.

"Cal, it's happening again!" said Ariel about ten minutes later when they were just over halfway round.

"You might sometimes get a cycle of regular Braxton Hicks contractions," said Cal. "It's nothing to worry about, but they should ease off soon."

Ariel was holding her bump again. "Cal, they're getting quite uncomfortable."

"They can be," said Cal.

Ariel smiled uncomfortably. "So, you've had them, have you? How do you deal with them?"

"Oh, I usually make a really big fuss when I'm in pain," said Cal. "I shout for Ethan to come and help me. He tells me to stop making a fuss."

"Actually, this one almost hurts. Are you sure this isn't the real thing?"

Cal knew prelabour was possible, but he didn't want to panic Ariel now. "Do you have any pain in your lower back?"

"Yes, I do," said Ariel.


	40. Chapter 40

_I hope the stuff about the London Eye is believable. I've never been on it as I really don't like Ferris wheels. Given the choice of climbing up like Ethan or riding, I'd climb up every time. I'm not quite sure how I'd get down again, but I'm still not riding on one!_

 **Gillian Kearney Fan** , it certainly looks like the babies are on their way! And not at the best time either. Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , I love 'Cal the Midwife' - brilliant! I want to see it! I know a bit about having twins, which helps, but I also really love the medical side so research is usually fun. I'm glad it's convincing and clear. Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. I'm sorry I scared you! It's really not the best venue for a birth or even the early stages of labour. Let's hope all the other passengers are fans of medical drama because they might see one!

* * *

"So. That's it," Ethan said finally. He took his glasses off and brushed quickly under his eyes. "I'm sorry. I just… conjunctivitis."

"Then you'll need to wash your hands," said Lily.

Ethan looked over at the sink and couldn't quite find the energy.

"It's fortunate that I don't believe you," said Lily.

"You don't believe me?" said Ethan, startled.

"About the conjunctivitis," said Lily.

"Ah. Right. Well, perhaps you're right not to believe it."

Lily hesitated. "It does sound very difficult. And relationships aren't my particular field of expertise. But it sounds to me as though there is no relationship between Cal and Ariel."

"They're going away together," said Ethan. "And you know what my brother's like."

Lily stiffened slightly.

"I mean by reputation," said Ethan. "I wasn't referring to your… date with Cal."

"I hope not," said Lily coolly. "That is entirely irrelevant."

"What am I going to do?" said Ethan hopelessly, his hands in his hair. "I love her, Lily."

"Then you need to stop loving her," said Lily.

Ethan flung his hands into the air. "How?"

"By the power of thought," said Lily. "I believe feelings for another person can always be overcome. Fears can be overcome. Anger can be overcome. So why not love?"

Ethan put his head in his hands. "It's not that simple, Lily. It can never be that simple. Love is more like an illness. An illness that can't be treated. All you can do is wait and see if it goes away."

"I am sure it will go away," said Lily. "Most people do not remain in love with the same person for their whole lives."

"But I might see her for my whole life," said Ethan. "With Cal."

"But Ethan, you say she doesn't want to see you or speak to you," said Lily. "That means you won't see her very often. That should help solve the problem. If she is in a relationship with Cal, that would be more difficult, but there is no evidence to suggest that she is."

"And if she is?" said Ethan sadly.

"If she is, you will have to learn to deal with it," said Lily. "You could try to split them up, but that will not make you happier. It will probably make you unhappier because you will be living with a heartbroken brother. I think Cal would be difficult enough to live with even when he's happy."

Ethan couldn't argue with that. "So all I can do is let them be together and try to be happy that two of the people I care about most are happy."

"That is the only way," said Lily. "But remember, Ethan. You can't be sure that they are in a relationship."

* * *

Cal got out his phone. "Oh God. Oh God. I'm not panicking. I can deal with this." His hand shook as he searched for the number and he accidentally went to the wrong screen. He swore. "Sorry, Liam. Sorry, Louisa. I hope you didn't hear that. Daddy's very naughty to say that." Finally, he found the right number. "Come on, Ethan. Please pick up! Pick up!" He grabbed Ariel's hand. "Don't panic, baby. Don't panic. It's going to be okay."

" _You're_ panicking!" Ariel pointed out.

"I know, but I'm the dad," said Cal.

Ariel shook her head and smiled slightly. "Don't worry. I'm sure I can do this. Women do this every day. So why not me?"

"Exactly," said Cal nervously, as Ethan finally answered.

"Hey."

"Ethan!"

"What's wrong?"

"Help me!" said Cal.

Ethan's voice was soothing. "It's okay, Cal. It's okay. Can you take some deep breaths for me?"

"You're telling _me_ to take deep breaths?" said Cal. "I'm not the one who's in labour!"

"Oh my goodness." For a minute, it sounded like Ethan might panic too. "Are you sure?"

"She's having contractions and they're hurting and she's got back pain too!" said Cal.

"Okay. Where are you?"

"On the London Eye!" said Cal. "Ethan, I am never going to laugh at you for being scared of Ferris wheels again. I've never been more terrified in my life! Except when I thought I was going to lose you."

Some of the other occupants of the capsule were crowding round, asking if everything was all right. Cal ignored him, but he heard Ariel's reply. "Well, I might be in labour, but Cal is a doctor and he's on his phone to his brother, who's also a doctor, so as far as going into labour on the London Eye goes, things could be worse."

Ethan's voice was still gentle. "Deep breaths for me, Cal. Are you holding Ariel's hand? I know you're scared, but she's going to be scared too and she needs you to keep calm and keep her calm."

Cal squeezed Ariel's hand. "I'll try, Ethan. Hang on, baby. You can do this. I'm right here."

"Okay: the back pain," said Ethan. "Is it different from the back pain Ariel usually experiences?"

"Of course it's different!" snapped Cal.

"Have you asked her?" said Ethan.

"Well, it's obviously different, isn't it?" said Cal, but he asked anyway. "Ariel, does the back pain you're feeling now feel any different from the back pain you usually experience?"

Ariel thought. "Well, it's worse than usual, but not the worst it's ever been."

"And it's in the same sort of place?" said Cal.

Ariel nodded,

"Does the pain feel like something's contracting?"

"Not really," said Ariel.

Cal dropped his head into the hand holding the phone.

"Cal? Are you still there?" Ethan's voice sounded small and tinny.

"Cal? Is there something wrong?" Ariel's voice was shrill.

Cal tried taking another deep breath. "Hold on, Ethan. Ariel, it's fine. I don't think you're in labour. Just to check: the pain did stop when we were walking before, didn't it?"

"Yes, it did," said Ariel.

Cal took her hand again. "Then it's okay: real labour doesn't do that." He frowned. At least, that was what he'd been taught, but what if this was different? He checked his watch. Only ten minutes to go. As soon as they got out of here, he decided, they would go to a hospital. He was perfectly capable of checking himself to see if Ariel was dilated, but it didn't seem quite right and it was much too public and he wasn't supposed to treat family members.

Even if they weren't a couple, she was family. She was his son and daughter's mother.

"Caleb?" said Ethan.

Cal told himself to breathe slowly and deeply and not panic. "I think it's probably Braxton Hicks, Ethan. Everything I've asked about indicates that this isn't real labour. But what if it is? What do I do then?"

"Have you asked where the pain of the contractions is?" Ethan sounded completely calm.

Cal tried to speak calmly too. "Whereabouts is the pain, Ariel? The actual contractions, I mean."

"Um, around the… you know… the front," said Ariel, blushing slightly.

 _Adorable_ , thought Cal, before shoving himself back into doctor mode.

"Then I'm sure it's not the real thing," said Cal, with a confidence he was fairly sure would have been genuine if he wasn't the father. "It can sometimes feel like the real thing at this stage in your pregnancy, but the real thing is much more painful and the contractions get progressively worse and closer together."

"You make it sound like so much fun," said Ariel.

"You'll be fine," said Cal softly. He put his arms around her. "You'll be brilliant. The best thing you can do is breathe through the pain – and why not start now? It'll be good practice for both of us."

* * *

"It's not the real thing?" said Ethan into the phone, but Cal was talking to Ariel and the thought came into Ethan's mind that Cal might have forgotten his existence.

Ethan felt Lily squeezing his hand. He'd been shocked when she'd decided to hold it because it wasn't like Lily, but it had helped him to stay calm, which he'd really needed to do in order to keep Cal calm.

"What's happening?" mouthed Lily.

"He's talking to Ariel," said Ethan. "But it does sound like Braxton Hicks."

"That's good," said Lily.

"Ethan?" Finally, Cal was back. "It's okay. I don't think she's in labour."

"That's a relief," said Ethan. "I hope she isn't too uncomfortable."

"I think she feels better now she knows she's not about to have two kids a couple of hundred metres up in the air," said Cal.

"It's only 135 metres," said Ethan comfortingly.

"135 metres?" squeaked Cal. "You would not be saying if it was 'only' 135 metres if you were stuck on this thing."

Ethan shuddered slightly just at the thought of it. "No, I'm sure I wouldn't be."

"But as soon as we get off this thing, I'm getting her checked out at a hospital, just to make sure," said Cal. "I'm fairly sure it's okay – I'm very sure – but I'm not prepared to take any chances."

"That sounds sensible," said Ethan.

Cal's voice had gone all wobbly. "I love her, Ethan. I probably shouldn't say this. I don't want to hurt you. But I love her. I love all three of them."

"I can understand why," said Ethan as gently as he could. "Don't worry. Do you know how far you are away from the end of the ride?"

"Just over five minutes, I think," said Cal.

"You can hold on for that long," said Ethan. "Maybe you could phone for a taxi – or an ambulance, if you're really worried – to meet you at the Eye. St Thomas' Hospital is probably the nearest and that's just down the road."

"How do you know _that_?" said Cal.

Ethan really wasn't sure. "Does it matter why? The point is I know, so I can reassure you it's not far away."

"Ethan?" said Cal.

"Yeah?"

"I'm glad you're my brother," said Cal.

Ethan laughed, more out of surprise than anything. "Very occasionally, Caleb, I'm glad too."


	41. Chapter 41

**Bonnie Sveen Fan** , thank you for your review. It is really difficult for both brothers.

 **Tanith Panic** , Cal probably could have kept it together a little bit better, considering he had to phone Ethan for help, but he was very calm for a nearly-dad! Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. I think Ethan was partly in doctor-mode when Cal told him, but he might feel less than calm when it sinks in!

* * *

"Are you all right?" asked Lily gently.

"Yes, I'm fine," said Ethan.

"Ethan…" Lily reached for his hand. "I'm sure you can deal with this."

"I don't have much choice really, do I?" said Ethan. He stood up.

"Where are you going?"

"Back to work," said Ethan sadly. "That's all I can do."

Lily was still holding his hand. "I admire your decision to go back to work, but are you sure you're in the right frame of mind?"

Ethan wasn't sure at all. He could feel tears threatening and he honestly felt as though his life was over, but that was no excuse.

"Ethan, did Cal say they were in a relationship?" said Lily.

"He said he loved her," said Ethan.

"That is not the same thing," said Lily. "It is possible Ariel does not feel the same way."

Ethan sighed and blinked hard. "That would be even worse."

Lily looked confused. "I believe that would solve your problem."

"Of course it wouldn't," said Ethan. "It would mean that Cal was feeling the same way as I am – and I wouldn't wish that on anyone."

* * *

On the way home from the hospital, Ariel was quiet. Cal was worried but not surprised. She'd been through a lot. "Are you okay?" he asked when they got back to the hotel.

Ariel nodded, but then she changed her mind. "It's so silly."

"Whatever it is, I'm sure I've done something sillier," said Cal.

"I suppose I'm a little bit disappointed," admitted Ariel. "I mean, it would be terrifying, giving birth in a strange city, and I don't know how we'd get the twins home on the train, but I really thought I was going to meet them at last. And that was more exciting than... than meeting One Direction!"

Cal put his arm around her. "I understand. I feel exactly the same. I've never felt so excited about meeting anyone. Um, the twins, I mean. Not One Direction."

Ariel rested her head on his shoulder. "I'm so glad you're here, Cal. If I'd been here on my own..."

Cal shook his head. "I wouldn't have let you go on your own. Not at this late stage in your pregnancy."

Ariel turned to look at him, though she didn't break the contact between her head and his shoulder. "But that's not the only reason why I'm glad you're here, Cal."

"No?" said Cal softly.

Ariel moved her lips closer to his. "No," she whispered.

* * *

Ethan did have a certain amount of sympathy with patients who hit their brothers. It would be a bit hypocritical for him to feel anything else, so he offset the sarcastic comments from Louise with gentleness and kindness.

He examined the patient's bruised, swollen knuckles as carefully as he could, apologising every time the patient winced. "I'm sorry, Barry. It looks like your brother has a very hard skull."

"He does have a very _thick_ skull," said Barry.

Louise looked disapproving. "He might be thick, but at least he's not the one throwing punches."

Barry glared at her. "He annoyed me, all right?"

"It can be very trying, having a brother," said Ethan sympathetically.

"Yeah, but you don't go around punching Cal, do you?" said Louise.

Ethan hesitated. "Not every day, no."

Louise's eyes widened. "You punched Cal? When?"

"Let's focus on our patient for now, Louise," said Ethan. "You can interrogate me later. Okay, Barry, can you clench your knuckles like this for me, please?"

Barry tried his best, but something was clearly wrong. "What's wrong with my fingers? Why are they doing that?"

Ethan reminded himself not to give the complete medical explanation, which was in his experience of no interest to anyone but himself. "If a finger crosses like that, it's a sign that the one next to it could be fractured. Considering that and your other symptoms, a fracture of the neck of the fifth metacarpal does seem likely, but we'll need an x-ray to confirm it."

"The neck?" Barry looked quite pleased. "I've got a broken neck?"

Ethan smiled. "I would be more inclined to say a broken finger. I'm afraid there might be a bit of a wait for an x-ray, so I'm going to ask Louise to find you a small ice-pack to help with the pain and swelling. If there is a fracture, it will most likely need immobilisation, which will mean putting your hand in a cast, probably for about three weeks."

"Three weeks?" Barry was looking a lot less pleased now. "How am I supposed to work with my hand in a cast?"

Louise curled her lip. "Maybe you should have thought of that before you hit your brother."

"It's sometimes very difficult to think clearly where irritating brothers are concerned," said Ethan. "Louise, could you sort out the mini ice-pack for me? Thank you."

* * *

Cal and Ariel lay together on the bed, her head on his shoulder, both slightly out of breath. Neither of them spoke for a while. Cal was as shocked as he was breathless and could barely formulate a thought in his mind, never mind speak it aloud.

"Wow," he said at last.

Ariel moved her head so she could see his face. "That's what you said last time."

"Last time must have been amazing," said Cal wistfully.

They hadn't gone all the way. Cal wanted to and he had the impression Ariel did too, but it seemed to much of a risk. They would have the rest of their lives to relive their first night together, but for now, their priority was the babies. Cal was 99% sure they could have sex safely – but that wasn't enough.

"I think you liked it," said Ariel modestly.

Cal kissed her forehead. "Did you like it?"

Ariel hesitated. "Yes, I did. I did wonder at first if I was doing the right thing. I didn't know how I could feel so sure of someone I'd only just met. But with you, it felt right. It feels right now."

"It feels right for me too," said Cal. "But I'm honestly happy just to hold you. My family."

* * *

Ethan was just leaving the reception area when he heard Barry being called for his x-ray. He had a quick look over his shoulder, but his concentration was mainly on his new patient, a very bright and chatty young lady who was very sweet at four years old but would probably be absolutely terrifying at fourteen.

He took Isabella into a cubicle and admired her Frozen hairband, Frozen lunchbox and Frozen sandals before turning his attention to her head injury, trying to work out if the fact she'd apparently forgotten all about it was a cause for concern or a sign that it really was nothing and she had more important things to fill her mind now.

As Isabella was displaying no symptoms other than the possible memory loss, Ethan decided not to send her for a scan – it was always a risk in such a young child – but to keep her under observation in case further symptoms developed. He then returned to reception to discover Barry standing on top of Noel's desk, belting out the lyrics to a song Ethan probably wouldn't have recognised even if Barry could sing.

Security had already been alerted and they got him down without too much trouble. Ethan was quite tempted to leave them to it, but his sense of responsibility overcame his nervousness.

He went over to Barry. "Hi. Have you been for your x-ray?"

"Nope," said Barry, folding his arms and grinning at Ethan.

Ethan told himself that he was not unnerved and even if he was, he wasn't going to show it. "I'll book you another slot. I wouldn't make such a fuss if it wasn't important, but your injury can't be treated without an x-ray and if there is a fracture, it will need to be immobilised."

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever," said Barry. He brushed his hair carelessly back from his forehead and winced slightly.

"And where's your-" Ethan had been going to enquire after Barry's ice-pack, but he stopped as he saw something even more worrying. A gash on his forehead. "You didn't tell me about that!"

"Didn't know I had to," said Barry, as blood began to trickle down his face.

"But… you'd better come with me right now," said Ethan.

Barry looked like he might refuse, but then he shrugged as though he'd come to the decision there was no harm in it. He followed Ethan to the cubicle.

Ethan put some gloves on and started to examine the wound. He was cleaning it up when the curtain was whipped aside and Lily walked in.

"Ethan, what are you doing with my patient?" she demanded.

Ethan stared at her. "I'm sorry, Lily, but this is my patient. Barry Todd. Suspected fracture to the fifth metacarpal and a head injury he didn't mention."

"No, this is my patient," said Lily crisply. "Garry Todd. Laceration to the forehead following a punch from his brother, who was wearing a ring."

"The lady is right," said Garry. "Though of course, I should say that anyway because everyone likes a gentleman, don't they, darling?"

"I most certainly do," said Lily. "Unfortunately, there is only one gentleman in this cubicle and it is not you, Mr Todd."

Ethan looked down at Garry's unbruised hand and groaned inwardly. "You're twins, aren't you?"

"Yeah, didn't Barry say?" said Garry.

"If you were my twin, I would not broadcast the fact," said Lily.

Garry laughed. "So even if you were my twin sister, you'd fancy me?"

Ethan stepped between them. "Would you like me to take over your patient, Dr Chao?"

"I can deal with him, Dr Hardy," said Lily. "I am not about to let a sexist and delusional patient stop me from doing my job." She gave Ethan a slight smile. "I don't usually, after all."

* * *

Ethan was starting to get a headache.

Why was everyone twins? Ethan was fairly sure that there were fewer than two incidences of twins in every 100 births. But he'd had to deal with four sets in one shift?

It should have been impossible.

Ethan went to see to his next patient, who was severely tachycardic. "Jessica, does anyone in your family have a heart condition?" he asked.

Jessica nodded. "One of my triplet sisters does. She was born with a... Dr Hardy, are you all right? You look like you're going to faint or something."


	42. Chapter 42

**Bonnie Sveen Fan** , Cal and Ariel's romance seems happy so far - but I really need to think of some way of cheering Ethan up! Thank you for your review.

 **CBloom2** , unfortunately, I've already said Ariel has only one sister, as that would have been a brilliant idea! Ethan's just stressed and headachey and he feels like he's being stalked by twins and triplets. Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , thank you for your review. Lily's rudeness is interesting because isn't rude in the same way as Connie or Louise - I think they know exactly what they're saying and how it sounds! Yes, I think I will have to hurt one of them.

 **ETWentHome** , I'm really glad you're happy for Cal and Ariel. Ethan's situation does make everything more difficult!. He is very unlucky at the moment, but I hope it won't last forever! Thank you for your review.

* * *

Cal was waiting outside the 02 a good half-hour before he expected the concert to finish, but even so, he felt anxious when Ariel didn't appear straight away. He'd tried his hardest to buy a ticket for the concert so Ariel wouldn't have to go to the concert on her own, but Rocker couldn't get hold of another ticket at such short notice and the ticket touts' prices were impossible, particularly when there were two babies on the way.

Once the half-hour was up, he felt even more terrified. He knew the concert might easily go on longer than they expected and no-one had come out of the auditorium yet. He also knew that if Ariel had gone into labour, she would have contacted him.

But still he trembled as he waited, berating himself for not being able to get another ticket. He should never have let her out of his sight. He didn't want to let her out of his sight ever again.

When his phone rang, he felt almost ready to collapse with relief. "Ariel?" he said, desperately hoping it was her and not someone from a hospital miles away.

There was a short silence. "Cal, are you okay?"

"No! I mean yes!" said Cal. "I mean… I'm sorry, baby. I was just so scared something might have happened to you and the babies. I know it's stupid."

"Of course it's not stupid!" said Ariel. "It means you care. And I'm so lucky you care."

"Where are you?" asked Cal.

"On my way out," said Ariel. "I'm moving very slowly because everyone is, but I'm quite happy to move slowly, considering the size of me!"

"You're the perfect size for someone with eight-month-old twins," said Cal. "And I'm a doctor, so I should know."

Ariel laughed. "I love you, Cal. But even you've got to admit I take up a lot of space."

"So would anyone if they were carrying twins!" said Cal. "But you're okay? You had a good time?"

"I'm fine," said Ariel. "I had a lovely time. I was worried it might be an anti-climax after last night, but it was great. This time, I wasn't constantly distracted by the handsome man beside me!"

"There was a handsome man beside you?" said Cal jealously.

"Only at the last concert," said Ariel. "I didn't even notice who was beside me this time."

Cal tried to remember who was sitting next to Ariel last night. "You had an aisle seat yesterday."

"But there was someone sitting on my other side, wasn't there?" said Ariel. "Someone wonderful. Someone amazing. Someone called Caleb Knight."

Cal started to laugh. It actually hadn't even occurred to him that she might be talking about him. "You must think I'm such an idiot."

"Well, I do think your taste in women is very strange," said Ariel. "But modesty is always an attractive trait."

"I's not often I get described as modest!"

They continued to talk as Ariel made her way out of the building. She spent some time describing what the band were wearing and how each song had been sung and all the differences from last night (differences Cal doubted he'd have been able to notice), but instead of feeling bored, he smiled because he could hear her voice.

He hoped he'd be able to hear her voice for the rest of his life.

"Okay: I'm back on the ground floor!" said Ariel. "Not long now."

"No… it'll just seem like an eternity!" said Cal. He knew he sounded soppy, but he decided he didn't care. He was in love; he wanted Ariel to know it – and he really didn't care about what anyone else might think.

An 'eternity' later, Ariel came through the doors. She stopped for a moment, her eyes scanning the crowds. Cal lifted his arm to wave at her and their eyes locked. Ariel worked her way through the crowds and when she'd finally burst through, she ran over to join him.

If Cal was honest with himself, it was more a fast waddle than a run, but he didn't mind. He thought she looked beautiful and he felt so lucky she was waddling over to _him_. He caught her in his arms and kissed her, feeling almost emotional as her arms wound tightly around her neck.

They got a taxi back to the hotel and went up to Ariel's room. There was no discussion of where they'd sleep and Ariel didn't invite Cal to join her, but none of that mattered. They did what seemed right – and it seemed right for them to be together.

"Are you hungry?" said Cal. "I can order room service."

"I don't know why," said Ariel, "but I'd really like some salted peanuts. Lots of them. Right now."

Cal laughed. "I've had that craving too. It's perfectly natural, especially at this time of night. I don't suppose you can get them through room service, but I'll go down to the bar."

"I don't want to put you to any trouble," said Ariel.

Cal kissed her. "First of all, I'm your boyfriend, so you're supposed to put me to lots of trouble, especially when you're pregnant. Secondly, nothing is too much trouble when it's for you – which does kind of make the first one redundant, but it all made sense in my head." He kissed her again. "Stay right there. Don't move."

* * *

Cal awoke in Ariel's arms.

He wondered if it had been like this the first time. Those first waking moments of warmth and safety. The feeling of deep contentment that began in his heart and spread through his body in a warm, golden stream of happiness.

He felt Ariel's body curled against him and his hand began to move slowly over her bump. He dimly remembered putting his hand there as they'd drifted off to sleep and it had stayed there all night, protecting his precious twins. Cal's other arm was wrapped around her shoulders, pulling her close to him. She slept with her face in his chest, breathing softly and evenly. Cal pressed his face into her golden curls. He kissed her and then breathed deeply.

He was wide awake now – how could he not be when he was so aware of every part of her? - but his thoughts drifted dreamily through his head and he didn't ever want to move.

Cal felt slight movement in his arms as Ariel slowly awoke. She shuffled backwards a little way and slowly lifted her face to his, her eyes widening and a slow smile spreading across her face.

And Cal remembered.

He remembered she'd done that before.

He couldn't remember anything else, but even that smallest memory was precious to him. He kissed Ariel's lips and murmured a soft greeting against them. She replied sleepily, then kissed him in return, moving close to him again.

"What time is it?" she murmured.

"Early," said Cal. "I hope." He rolled over to check his travel alarm clock. Only the knowledge that unborn babies could hear voices prevented him from swearing out loud. "Ariel, we have to check out in an hour!"

Ariel looked regretful, but she sat up and ran her hand along his stubbly jaw. "Then we'd better get out of bed."

"I don't want to!" whined Cal.

"I've got a bed in my flat," said Ariel, smiling. "I think you quite liked it."

"And you're happy for me to stay with you?" said Cal.

Ariel nodded and bent down to kiss him. "We're family now, Cal."

The words made Cal feel emotional. "Yes. We are."

"But I'm afraid you still have to get out of bed."

* * *

Ethan lay on the sofa, unsure if he was grateful to have the day off or not. Connie had sent him home yesterday after becoming concerned by his pallor. Unwilling to admit he was terrified he was being stalked by multiple births, he'd told her about the headache. She'd told him to take tomorrow off too and book an appointment with his GP.

Ethan hadn't made the appointment. He was fairly sure it was just stress and that wasn't something he could avoid at the moment, so all he could do was dim the lights, stay hydrated, do relaxation exercises and massage his head as best he could. It seemed to help and he'd felt fine that morning, but as the likely hour for Cal's return had approached, Ethan's head had started to throb again.

When he heard the front door being unlocked, he closed his eyes and groaned silently, but to his relief, Cal was alone.

"Are you okay?" he asked, clearly concerned, when he discovered his brother lying on the sofa.

"I had a headache yesterday and Mrs Beauchamp said to take the day off," said Ethan.

Cal dropped his bag in the middle of the floor and knelt down beside Ethan. "Another headache?"

"I think it's just stress," said Ethan.

Cal stroked his hair. "I'm really sorry, Ethan. The last thing I want is to cause you stress."

Ethan managed a small smile. "It's not your fault. These things happen."

"I was going to go and see Ariel later," said Cal apologetically. "But I can stay with you."

"You don't have to do that. It's important for you to spend time with Ariel," said Ethan. "You love her. And I'm sure she loves you."

There was pain in Cal's eyes as he nodded his head. "I'm sorry."

Ethan laughed shakily. "Stop apologising. It's not like you."

"Being so stressed and unhappy isn't like you," said Cal sadly.

"I'm sure I'll get over it," said Ethan. He touched Cal's arm. "And I'm happy for you, Caleb. I really am."

Cal took Ethan's hand in his. "And one day, Nibbles, you'll find someone special and I'll be happy for you."

"I can't see that happening," said Ethan with a sigh.

"It will happen, Ethan. You won't feel like this forever," said Cal. "You'll find someone else. You'll fall in love again."

"I imagine I will," said Ethan. "But that's not enough, Cal. I need to find someone who'll fall in love with _me_."


	43. Chapter 43

**westlife4ever80** , Ethan is a sensitive guy and that's one reason why I love him! I love a bit of sensitivity in a guy. Thank you for your review. It's lovely that you're reading so many of my stories.

 **AraliaeShade** , thank you for your review - I'm so glad you're enjoying it. I think there might be a few volunteers to fall in love with Ethan, but you're the first!

 **CBloom2** , I love Ethan to bits too! It probably will be more difficult when the babies are born, but I definitely will be including a part where Ethan holds them. It might be emotional! Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , the love scenes probably should have been more graphic considering they're from Cal's point of view, but I'm glad you like them as they are! Thank you for your review. I'm so glad you're still enjoying it.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. It's still the most incredible surprise when someone feels emotional over my writing! Poor Ethan. There are so many people in love with him, but we're not in Casualty, unfortunately!

* * *

Ethan returned to work the next day. Cal had been very supportive without fussing over him, but in a way, that had made Ethan feel even worse. He really wanted Cal and Ariel to be completely happy together and he knew that must be difficult when Ethan was so miserable.

"Don't push yourself too hard," said Cal, as the two of them left the staff room.

"Try not to worry too much about Ariel," Ethan responded. "There have been no serious complications so far with her pregnancy and she might have another four weeks to go."

Cal smiled and patted Ethan's arm. "Not much gets past you, does it?"

"It's natural to worry," said Ethan. "And Cal…" He stopped for a moment, his courage failing him momentarily, but then he continued. "You can talk to me. If you need to. It's fine. I'd like to support you. All of you."

* * *

"How was the concert?" asked Connie.

Cal looked at the clinical lead in shock. He hadn't mentioned the concert when he'd asked for the time off. He'd said it was a serious family emergency.

At the time, it hadn't seemed like a lie. The idea of Ariel going off to London on her own terrified him. If it wasn't a serious family emergency, it certainly had the potential to become one. And considering Ariel had ended up in the emergency department of a hospital, Cal had been right to worry.

He wondered how Connie had found out. Ethan knew, of course, but he couldn't imagine Ethan telling the clinical lead where Cal really was. At one time, he'd thought nothing of getting Cal into trouble and revealing him to be a liar, but he hadn't done anything like that for a long time.

So she must have found out from Iain. Cal couldn't see any occasion for Iain to tell Connie directly, but except where patients were concerned, Iain wasn't known for his discretion. Or for keeping his voice down. Cal didn't think Connie would lower herself so far as to eavesdrop, but her hearing was exceptionally good – as Cal had discovered to his cost more than once.

"You don't look as though you've been Up All Night," said Connie. "But maybe that's What Makes You Beautiful."

Cal laughed. "I wouldn't have put you down as a Directioner."

"I'm not," said Connie. "But I have a daughter."

Cal couldn't help smiling as he thought that he would soon have a daughter too – not to mention a son! "Yeah. The concert was good. Thanks for not firing me."

"I suppose 'serious family emergency' technically wasn't inaccurate," said Connie. "No half-decent father would want the mother of his children going off to a concert alone at such a late stage of her pregnancy."

Cal stared at her. So she knew that too?

It wasn't that he didn't want everyone to know about Ariel. He was loved her and he was thrilled they were going to be parents, but he was nervous about how everyone would react. It was fair to say Cal had a little bit of a reputation for not treating women as well as they deserved and he and Ariel hadn't been together for long. Impossible as it seemed, it was less than forty-eight hours.

No. That was wrong. They'd been together for much longer than that. They might not have kissed until the day before yesterday (first meeting aside) or agreed to become a couple until yesterday, but they'd been a partnership of sorts for a while. They'd planned for the babies' futures together and they'd supported one another. Not just with impending parenthood but with everything.

Cal couldn't quite say they'd been together ever since their first meeting, but there had obviously been something between him and Ariel from the start. A bond which not even his accidental desertion of her could break completely.

"So, you heard about this from Iain, did you?" Cal said at last, just to check.

"No, Ethan told me," said Connie.

Cal couldn't speak. It was surprising enough that Ethan had mentioned it to anyone at work – he tended to keep his personal life separate from his working life.

But that Ethan could confide in _Connie_ , of all people…

If it had been Zoe, that would have made more sense, but Connie did not invite confidences. For the most part, she didn't even care what happened outside the hospital, as long as it didn't affect what happened inside.

"It must have been very difficult for you, particularly when you've forgotten your initial meeting with Ariel," said Connie.

Cal was lost for words. How much had Ethan told her? "I… um… yeah. Yeah, it was."

"I hope you're not Ready to Run, Dr Knight," said Connie. She looked completely serious – and perhaps she was. "Ariel's going to need you to help with the Night Changes."

Cal tried to laugh; tried to seem as normal as possible. He was shocked by what Ethan had done, but he didn't want Connie to know that. "I'll have to step up if I don't want someone to Steal My Girl," he said, laughing again, but it sounded forced to him and he didn't doubt Connie would realise that.

"He really is very upset, you know," said Connie.

Cal tried not to glare at her. Of course Ethan was upset! Did she really think he hadn't noticed that? Ethan was his little brother.

Another song title came to mind: Where Do Broken Hearts Go?

Cal knew exactly where broken hearts went. To the clinical lead's office to tell other people's secrets.

* * *

Ethan was aware Cal was avoiding him. It wasn't the first time it had happened – or even the first time when Ethan hadn't known why – but it bothered him. He and Cal were, by their standards, very close at the moment. He couldn't think what might have happened to upset Cal.

"Cal, is everything all right?" he asked when they had a moment.

"Why wouldn't it be?" said Cal.

"Could we, maybe, talk?" said Ethan.

"I'm working," said Cal. "And so are you."

Ethan felt annoyed but also worried. "Cal, why are you avoiding me?"

"I'm not!" said Cal. "I'm just trying to do my job."

Ethan tried again. "When are you going for your break?"

"I don't know, but we can't go at the same time," said Cal. "Not with Dylan and Zoe both off."

He was right, of course, but it didn't help Ethan to feel reassured.

"We'll talk after work," said Cal. "We do live together, after all."

He walked away before Ethan could say anything else, but it seemed to Ethan that Cal was angry.

Cal didn't know if he was glad or not when work was over for the day. He was still furious with Ethan, but at the same time, he knew their conversation would be a very difficult conversation and he wasn't looking forward to it.

They'd come to work in separate cars as Cal had been planning on going to see Ariel straight after work. They'd agreed he'd go over that evening – Ariel didn't know it, but most of the baby equipment Cal had ordered secretly while she was at the second concert would be arriving then – but by morning, he'd been missing her badly and had decided to go and see her straight after work.

But now, he decided to stick to the original plan. If he went to see Ariel now, he'd end up blurting out what Ethan had done and he wasn't sure he wanted to tell her in case it upset her.

Without saying a word to Ethan, Cal drove home and waited for him. When Ethan walked into the living room, the look of surprise on his face might have amused Cal in any other circumstances.

At least, it would have done if Ethan hadn't also looked on the verge of tears.

"Cal," he said, moving his mouth in a way that was probably meant to be a smile. "I thought you were going out."

"I wanted to talk to you about something," said Cal.

Ethan looked confused and worried. He blinked a couple of times and sat beside Cal. "Is everything all right?"

"No, actually, it's not," said Cal. He breathed deeply a couple of times, aware that Ethan was upset already. Yelling at him wouldn't help – well, it might relieve Cal's feelings momentarily, but he knew he'd feel guilty if he made Ethan cry. Even though Ethan was the one who ought to be feeling guilty.

Ethan looked concerned. "What's happened? Is Ariel all right?"

"How _could_ you tell Connie about Ariel?" burst out Cal.

So much for not yelling at Ethan.

Ethan drew back slightly. "I'm sorry. I didn't think it would matter."

"Of course it matters!" said Cal angrily. "It's none of your business! It's Ariel's business and I really don't think she'd be too happy about a complete stranger knowing she had a one-night stand."

"I'm sure Mrs Beauchamp wouldn't think anything of it," said Ethan. "Everyone has one-night stands. Well, nearly everyone."

"I don't think it's anything like 'nearly everyone' if the number of knock-backs I've had means anything… not that I'm saying there have been a lot of knock-backs… and even if it was, that's not the point!" said Cal, even more angry now he'd accidentally mentioned the knock-backs. "Ariel wouldn't usually and I don't want anyone judging her for it."

"I honestly don't think Mrs Beauchamp did judge her," said Ethan.

Cal snorted. "Of course she judged her. And she judged me too! She actually warned me not to run away like I usually do. Oh, she dressed it up with a One Direction song title, but I know exactly what she meant. How is that any of her business? Because you told her: that's why!"


	44. Chapter 44

**Bonnie Sveen Fan** , I remember driving my parents mad listening to the same singers on a loop! One thing I love about Connie is that she's often sympathetic at unexpected moments. I think she does it on purpose! Thank you for your review.

 **CBloom2** , that's the problem with Cal and Ethan. Even in my stories, when they spend half the time hugging each other, they do have the odd fall-out! That's true - talking about it might really help Ethan. Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , I'm glad you like Connie's puns. She wouldn't normally do that, but I think she delights in throwing Cal off-balance in any way she can. Ethan is in the doghouse, but will Cal throw him a bone? Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. I think if Cal thought about things properly, he'd realise that Ethan needed to talk to someone and probably didn't have the option of refusing to tell Connie, but Cal and thinking don't always go together"

* * *

Ethan's lip was trembling. He bit down hard in an effort to control it and winced at the pain. "Cal, I'm so sorry. I didn't intend to tell her. It's very difficult to say no to Mrs Beauchamp sometimes."

"And you not only told her about the situation, you also neglected to mention how much I care about Ariel?" said Cal angrily. "You made her think that this is just another instance of Caleb Knight trying to avoid responsibility? How could you even think that?" Hurt came into his voice. "I love these babies and I love Ariel. I thought you understood that."

Ethan looked down at his hands, trying to hide the tears that were filling his eyes again. "I know you're not trying to avoid responsibility. I know you're committed to being a dad. I never meant to imply anything else and I'm very surprised if I did." He paused and tried to think. "In fact, I'm almost sure I told her you're stepping up and doing the right thing."

"Oh, so I get the Nibbles seal of approval, do I?" said Cal. "Well, that makes it all okay, doesn't it?" He got to his feet.

"Where are you going?" said Ethan, alarmed.

"Out."

Ethan looked up at him in alarm, no longer caring that he was nearly crying. "Cal, please don't go now. Let's talk some more. I really am so sorry that I told Mrs-"

"Save it!" said Cal tersely.

"Will you tell Ariel I'm sorry?" said Ethan. "I never meant to hurt her."

"It seems you're making quite a habit of that!" snapped Cal.

Ethan recoiled, but then anger overrode his hurt. "I'm not the one who slept with her and then broke my promise!"

Cal looked hurt too now. "You know why I did that, Ethan. I had concussion. If I hadn't forgotten, I would never have-"

"This concussion of yours is very convenient, isn't it?" said Ethan bitterly.

Cal's hand clenched into a fist and for a horrible moment, Ethan really thought Cal might hit him. But instead, he got to his feet and walked out of the room. Seconds later, Ethan heard the door of the flat slamming behind him.

Ethan waited, wondering if he felt relieved Cal had gone or angrier than ever, but he found he didn't feel either of those things.

He was devastated. Devastated about Ariel, of course, but also that he and Cal had argued. Terribly disappointed with himself for caving in and telling Connie with so little resistance. Cal was right. He had no right to tell his boss about Cal's private business, particularly not when it potentially put Cal in an unfavourable light.

Not that Connie had ever viewed Cal in a favourable light, but this was one time where Cal was actually doing the right thing and doing a really good job of it.

Ethan leaned back against the sofa and closed his eyes.

What had happened to him? What had happened to both of them? A month ago, Cal had been the unhappy, lonely and probably still heartbroken one. Not to mention the one who always messed everything up. Now Ariel had come into their lives and they seemed to have swapped places.

* * *

Cal slammed the car door and turned the key viciously, feeling the engine throbbing in time with his anger.

He couldn't remember the last time he'd been this angry with Ethan. Perhaps he never had been. On all the other occasions, he'd been forced to admit (very reluctantly, right in the back of his mind) that Ethan might have a point.

But he didn't have a point this time.

Cal stamped down on the accelerator and the car shot backwards. He managed to stamp on the brake just before it hit the car in the set of bays opposite. He stopped the engine and took a couple of breaths as he wondered what else Ethan had told Connie. That he wasn't up to being a dad?

Probably. That was the kind of thing Ethan would say.

Or the kind of thing he used to say. More recently, he'd actually been encouraging of Cal's decision to support Ariel and the babies, even though the idea of them as a family clearly hurt him.

Obviously, something had happened to change his mind. Cal must have done something irresponsible and Ethan had gone running off to Connie to tell her that Dr Knight had messed up again.

Cal thumped the steering wheel and realised he was blocking the road between the sets of parking bays. He decided he'd better go before Ethan looked out of the window and saw him and added another imperfection to the list. Cal started up the car again, made an extremely tight and ill-advised left turn (Ethan would definitely not have approved), roared out of the car park without changing gear and turned into the road without indicating.

Cal wasn't sure where he was going. His first thought was to go to Ariel. She would comfort him, he knew. She would find some way of convincing him it wasn't as bad as he'd thought. But as soon as he'd reached the traffic lights (his indicator on this time), he realised he couldn't tell Ariel what was wrong without letting her know that she was the inadvertent trigger for Ethan's actions.

The traffic lights went green. Cal changed his mind about the left turn and went straight on instead, narrowly avoiding a crash and earning himself some angry toots from more than one car horn, but he didn't care. He kept on driving, anger continuing to churn inside him. If it wasn't enough that Ethan had _lied_ about him to Connie, he was now preventing him from seeing the woman he loved because he didn't want to risk upsetting her.

Cal knew that thought was about as logical as Ethan's recent behaviour, but he decided he didn't care. He increased his speed, conscious now that he was on a road that would take him out of Holby; out into the countryside. Further and further away from Ethan - but also further away from Ariel. If he kept driving for too much longer, he'd be in danger of not arriving at her flat in time for dinner.

Cal watched as the houses thinned out and were eventually replaced by fields. He felt slightly calmer now he was further from Ethan. Maybe he was overreacting. It was true what Ethan had said about it being difficult to say no to Connie. If she'd asked Ethan: "Where's your brother _really_ , Dr Hardy?" Ethan would have told the truth. Ethan always told the truth unless specifically told not to by Cal (and sometimes not even then). In this case, Cal hadn't told him to keep the concert a secret so he wouldn't have had any kind of lie prepared.

Cal had seen for himself today (not that he'd for one moment forgotten) that Connie could be terrifying. He remembered the look on her face when she'd said: "I hope you're not Ready to Run, Dr Knight."

The words had echoed in Cal's mind several times before he understood their significance. He might say he was taking a drive to cool off after a row with Ethan, but perhaps he was running away. He'd driven quite a long way by now and even if he turned around now, he only had a slim chance of getting to Ariel's flat on time.

So were Ethan and Connie right about him? Was he now running away from Ariel too?

Of course he was. He might tell himself that it was for her benefit: so she wouldn't know he was upset and angry. But it was still, in a sense, running away. As so often was the case with Cal, it would also cause a further problem: an explanation would almost certainly be required for his lateness.

He felt the car judder and automatically glanced at the dashboard. There was a red warning light on it. Cal checked the temperature gauge: it was high. He was sure all this meant something, but he couldn't think what at the moment. He decided to call Ethan.

Then he remembered he was angry with Ethan and decided he'd call the AA instead. Or the RAC. Whichever one had had the best deal the last time Cal had needed to renew his breakdown cover. He might look like an idiot for not knowing how his own car worked (or indeed which breakdown cover provider he was with), but that was better than asking Ethan for help again. It wasn't as though Ethan knew that much about engines anyway.

Cal checked the road was still clear, then parked at the side of the road. There wasn't a great deal of space for a large vehicle to get past him, but perhaps the breakdown people would tell him it was fine to continue driving.

If only Cal could remember which one he needed to call.

He opened the glove compartment in the hope that he might have been sensible to put the details in there. He found quite a lot of condoms, as well as handbooks for both the AA and RAC, but nothing to suggest which one he was with now.

Ethan would probably know. That was the kind of annoying thing he would know.

Cal sighed and looked across at the passenger seat, which was where he usually threw his phone when the seat wasn't occupied. It wasn't there. He checked both his pockets and found his wallet and various pieces of junk including more condoms but no phone.

Telling himself there was no reason to panic quite yet, Cal checked the back seat and the floor of the car, but he still didn't find his phone.

He leaned back against the head rest, his eyes closed.

So he was stuck, miles from anywhere, with a warning light on his car and no phone. Clearly, he needed to go and find a phone, but he had no idea which would be the best direction to take. And even if he did know, it probably wasn't a good idea for him to drive. He'd have to walk.

Cal's last thought before he finally allowed himself to panic was that there was no avoiding being late for dinner with Ariel now.


	45. Chapter 45

**Bonnie Sveen Fan** , Ariel will be upset, but everyone forgets their phone and has car trouble sometimes. Driving off in a big sulk and missing dinner with your girlfriend might not go down quite so well, but she knows what Cal's like! Thank you for your review.

 **westlife4ever80** , thank you for your review. Cal is used to being in awkward situations, but he's also used to having Ethan to come and rescue him! It might be quite difficult for him to get out of this on his own!

 **Tanith Panic** , I'm glad you see Cal as a 'former' rogue! I didn't think of it like that, but I do love stories where good intentions are thwarted - it is sad, but it can also be very involving. I hope you enjoy the brothers in this chapter too! Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. They do need to be happy at the same time! I think the only time I have seen them happy at the same time was when they had Matilda - but I'm not sure Cal's twins will bring them together in the same way.

* * *

Ethan was already following the sound of the phone before he realised it wasn't his ringtone. He had no idea what it was, but it wasn't to his taste at all.

He followed the sound to Cal's room and managed to track it as far as a pile of dirty clothes before it stopped ringing. He put the phone in his pocket and picked up the clothes, intending to put them in the washing machine, but the phone started ringing again almost straight away. Ethan shifted the dirty washing into one arm and pulled the phone out of his pocket.

It was Ariel.

"Hi, Ariel. It's Ethan. I'm afraid Cal isn't here at the moment."

"Where is he?" Ariel's voice was shrill. "I need him, Ethan. I need him. I…" He heard her cry out in pain.

Ethan let the dirty clothes fall to the floor. "What's wrong, Ariel?" he asked, but he had a horrible feeling he knew.

"I think… I'm… in labour!" Ariel almost screamed the words.

Ethan mentally called Cal some of the worst names he could think of. Of all the times he could have chosen to drive off in a strop without his phone… "I'm very sorry, Ariel. I don't know where he is. But it's going to be okay. Can you breathe for me? Pretend Cal's with you and breathe like you and Cal practised at your ante-natal classes."

"I'm scared!" sobbed Ariel.

"Of course you are," said Ethan compassionately. "It's a new experience and a painful one. But I'm sure everything's going to be all right Would you like to try breathing with me for a little bit?" He guided her through several breaths. "That's good. Keep going like that. If you start to panic again, let me know and I'll help you through it." As Ethan was speaking, he moved around the flat, collecting his keys and making sure he had money. "Okay, I'm going to come over to your flat now and then I'll drive you to the hospital. Have you phoned your midwife?"

"No… oh, it hurts, Ethan!... no, I didn't."

"That's okay," said Ethan. "You can phone when you've finished talking to me. Have you got a bag packed with everything you need?"

"Yes, I have," moaned Ariel. "Oh… it hurts… it hurts!"

"I know, sweetheart, but I'll be with you very soon," said Ethan. "It's going to be okay. I'll keep talking to you till I'm in the car." He scribbled a quick note for Cal. "Okay, I'm leaving the flat now. It might help if you try moving around, like you did on the London Eye. Keep breathing for me. That's right. If it's not too personal a question, have you had your, um, show yet?"

"Yes, and I think… my waters have… broken!" wailed Ariel.

"It must be absolutely terrifying," said Ethan sympathetically. "But even though it feels very strange and scary, it's all perfectly normal and actually a good sign. I'm sorry to have to ask you this: it must sound very odd coming from your boyfriend's brother, but was the colour and the amount of blood as you expected, and was it smelly at all?"

"No… not smelly… not much blood… colour right."

"That's good," said Ethan. "Do you know how far apart your contractions are?"

"Eight minutes," said Ariel. "I know it says wait till five, but I wanted Cal."

Ethan spoke reassuringly. "Of course you do. I'm so sorry I can't find him for you, but I'll come over now and sit with you until the contractions are five minutes apart. Do you know how long they're lasting, on average?"

"Ages! Oh, my back hurts too, Ethan."

"I'll see what I can do to help when I arrive," said Ethan. "Try not to worry. I'll do everything I can. Has the contraction stopped yet?"

"I think so. Thank you, Ethan. I'm so glad you're coming. I thought it was labour for the last couple of hours, but I tried not to worry because I knew Cal was coming."

"I'm sorry about Cal," said Ethan. "That's partly my fault, I'm afraid. We had a bit of an argument and he got quite upset. But I'm sure he'll be with you once he's calmed down a bit. I've left a note for him and we'll leave a note on your door too."

"What if he doesn't come?" said Ariel in a frightened voice.

"Once I'm with you, I'll phone a friend of Cal's called Max," said Ethan. "I'll ask him to ring round various places where Cal might be." Max might be at work, but he very seldom seemed to have anything to do. "But I'm sure once Cal's calmed down a bit, he'll remember about the dinner and come straight back. He just needs a little bit of time. I'm sure he'll be with you soon. I'll look after you until Cal gets there."

A little voice in Ethan's head added: _If he gets there_.

* * *

It felt as though Cal had been walking for hours. A few cars had driven past, but although Cal had waved his arms frantically, none of them had stopped. He knew there was no chance of getting to Ariel's on time – and without a phone, there was no way he could let her know what had happened.

Now Cal had calmed down, he could see how stupid he'd been. He had a family now, or he almost did. He couldn't drive off in a sulk every time something happened that he didn't like. He had to keep his promises to his girlfriend. Not forgetting that she'd cooked for him especially.

Not keeping an eye out for any warning lights on his car was stupid. It seemed impossible that Cal could miss something like that, but he'd certainly been in no condition to care about anything much when he'd got into the car. Cal knew, however, that this wasn't an excuse for what had happened. It was another reason why he shouldn't be driving

Cal's hopes rose as he heard another car and he stopped walking, debating whether or not to run into the car's path. If he did that, it would be almost impossible for them to drive around him safely, but what if the driver didn't see him in time? He would be of no use to his girlfriend and children if he got himself killed.

As the car came into view, he raised a hand, jumping up and down slightly in an attempt to make him look even more obvious. When the driver glanced his way, Cal moved towards the car, certain it would stop, but it didn't even slow down and Cal was forced to scuttle out of the way

A girl in the back seat waved at Cal as they passed – but if she did attempt to get her dad to stop and talk to the handsome man who was waving, she was unsuccessful.

Cal scowled at the car's back window and kicked out at a lamp-post, getting nothing for his troubles but a very painful toe. Cal screamed in pain and leaned against the lamp-post as he took his shoe off and massaged his toe, saying lots of very rude words which he wouldn't be able to say when he was a daddy.

After a while, the pain went off slightly and Cal decided he'd better be brave and continue walking. He was limping slightly, which bothered him at first, but then he thought a car might be more likely to stop for him if they thought he was in pain.

He kept walking – well, limping – but he saw no cars at all. A bend was coming up ahead of him and Cal told himself there would be a house on the other side of the bend. _A house with a phone. A house with really nice people who are happy to let me use their phone._

Cal found he was crossing his fingers. He had no idea why – that had always been Ethan's thing, not Cal's – but he was desperate enough to try anything. Miles away, the woman he loved had prepared a dinner for him – and he wasn't there. She would be sitting there, waiting as the meal grew cold. Cal felt a lump in his throat. He knew exactly how that felt. He'd been in that position when Taylor had stood him up. He'd already known by then that Taylor was a con-artist and Ethan had made it pretty clear that he didn't expect Cal to see Taylor again, but Cal had still believed she loved him and was certain she would arrive.

Ariel would be doing a whole lot more than hoping. She would be _expecting_ Cal to be there.

Cal's chest ached. All he wanted was to be with Ariel. To hold her in his arms and tell her he loved her. But he couldn't even tell her that on the phone.

Cal could remember the days when he hadn't had a phone. Only one or two people at Cal's school had had one and Cal remembered begging his parents to buy him one for Christmas and his birthday, but they'd always told Cal he'd have to save up for one. Saving up had never been Cal's strong suit.

He knew he'd have to get better at saving once the babies came, but for now, there were lots of things to buy. Cal had cancelled the cheap double-cot that Ariel had reluctantly ordered, replacing it with the one he knew she'd really wanted. He'd also ordered a double push-chair; carry-cots and car seats; a playpen; two high chairs for when the babies were older; numerous bedclothes and pillows; the beautifully-made but expensive pink and blue onesies emblazoned with: _He's My Twin_ and _She's My Twin_ , which Ariel had fallen in love with but had regretfully decided weren't a necessity.

There had been other things too, Cal remembered. He might actually have overdone things a little bit, but Ariel deserved it. The twins deserved it. He wanted them to have the very best.

There was the small issue that they wouldn't all fit into Ariel's flat, so Cal wasn't quite sure how they'd manage when all the stuff was delivered – he'd hoped inspiration would strike at some point.

Then Cal realised something. Something so horrible, he forgot all about limping.

Almost everything he'd ordered would be arriving tonight. He'd arranged it especially to make sure he'd be there.

But he wouldn't be there. Ariel would have to deal with it all on her own – and there was no guarantee the delivery men would carry it into the flat for her. They didn't always like carrying things upstairs in case they injured themselves. So they might just leave it outside her flat, blocking off everyone's path. There was no way Ariel would be able to carry any of it. Especially not when she was pregnant.

Cal groaned out loud.

Once more, he'd completely messed up. And as usual, he had no idea what he was going to do.


	46. Chapter 46

**westlife4ever** , thank you for your review. The longer the labour is, the more chance there is of Cal getting back before the birth - but poor Ariel probably doesn't know what to wish for!

 **Bonnie Sveen Fan** , all Ethan can do is hope Cal gets in contact soon, but he doesn't know Cal has no access to a phone - he probably thinks he's sulking in a pub somewhere! Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , I agree - Ethan would be a wonderfully reassuring presence and I can imagine him being quite a lot calmer than Cal! I think this next chapter could surprise you, but I hope it won't be a bad surprise. Thank you for your review.

 **X-Sammii-X** , I'm so glad you like the story. I wondered if you'd like it as you like to write about Cal as a daddy, but I feel a bit funny about recommending my own stories! I think you're right about Cal being scared but excited. Thank you for your review.

 _Thank you to **X-Sammii-X** for the follow and favourite._

* * *

Ethan didn't know he was going to hug Ariel until his arms were already around her, but she hugged him back. If she clung to him more tightly than he'd expected, it was only natural in the circumstances. "It's going to be okay, Ariel. I'm here now. I'll do whatever I can to help you and I'll do my very best to get hold of Caleb. This is one responsibility he's not going to get out of if I can help it."

"It's not really his fault," said Ariel.

She said it without reproach, but Ethan felt it all the same. "You're right. It's my fault."

Ariel gasped. "Oh, no, I didn't mean that, Ethan! Everyone gets in a mood sometimes and storms off somewhere and Cal couldn't have known tonight would be the night."

Ethan felt a moment's annoyance that she was defending Cal, but then he decided it was for the best – and she did have a point. "You're right. It was just bad timing. Why don't you go and sit down or walk around or whatever is most helpful and I'll call Max?"

Ethan watched like a hawk as Ariel walked, ready to spring into action at the smallest sign that something was wrong. She looked beautiful – radiant and glowing and all the other clichéd words everyone said about pregnant women – but he tried not to think about that.

Ariel needed his help and Ethan knew he mustn't let his feelings get in the way.

He phoned Max and was relieved when he answered straight away.

"Max, I don't suppose you have any idea where my brother is?"

"Cal? He said he was going to his girlfriend's for dinner," said Max. He laughed. "He must have told me at least five times. He's besotted! He won't stop talking about her or the babies and it be love if he took her to see One Direction."

"I'm at his girlfriend's flat now," said Ethan. "She's in labour and he hasn't got his phone with him. I don't suppose you could do me a really big favour and try to track him down for me? If you call people he might be with; maybe visit some of his favourite pubs?"

"Sure. No problem," said Max. "I'll give the ED a call too, just in case he's been brought in."

Ethan felt a jolt of fear run through him at Max's words – that was something he'd been trying not to think about – but he knew Max was thinking aloud. It wouldn't have occurred to him how much his words could upset Ethan. "Thank you, Max. That would be a great help."

"Robyn and Lofty are here so I'll get them on it too," said Max. "Don't worry, Ethan. We'll do everything we can."

* * *

Cal nearly collapsed when he saw it.

A house - with a car parked in the drive.

The sight of it gave Cal a new energy. He ran up the drive and rang the doorbell. It was only when he'd done that that it occurred to him that the house owners wouldn't necessarily want to help him, but he hoped his natural charm would carry him through.

Cal waited patiently enough at first. After all, the home owners could be busy. It wasn't always possible to open the door as soon as the doorbell was rung.

But when there was no answer after what Cal judged to be more than thirty seconds, he rang the bell again, jabbing it a little more forcefully this time. It made no difference to the volume, but at least it had relieved Cal's agitation just slightly.

The agitation was soon to return tenfold. Again, there was no answer and Cal was forced to conclude that, despite the presence of the car, the house might be empty. A lot of families had more than one car.

Cal considered walking away, but he didn't want to give up yet. He didn't know when he'd be lucky enough to find another house. There might be someone in the garden who couldn't hear the doorbell – and if there was someone in the house who wasn't answering, it was possible they were ill or injured and unable to get to a phone.

As a doctor, it would be highly remiss of him to leave now.

Cal lifted the letterbox and bent down to peer into it. He saw a tidy hallway in a very boring brown and beige, but no sign of anyone, alive or otherwise. He put his mouth to the letterbox. "Hello? Is anyone here?"

No answer.

Cal tried again, a little louder. "Hello? My name's Dr Caleb Knight." A lot of suspicious people became instantly more trusting when Cal revealed his profession. "I'm having car trouble and I don't have my phone with me. I was wondering whether you might be able to help."

Still no answer, but while Cal could shout, it was likely that an unwell or injured person would struggle to be heard, even when conscious.

He left the front door and began a careful circuit of the house. There was another door at the side, but it was locked. He went around to the back of the house and gasped aloud in shock. There was a large, jagged hole in one of the back windows – just enough for someone to stick their hand through and unlock the window from the inside. Cal searched his pockets for a tissue to wrap his hand in, but all he could find was condoms. He considered wrapping his hand in one – the ones he used were very stretchy and he told himself they needed to be – but he decided it was unnecessary, as well as a waste of a perfectly good condom.

Carefully, he manoeuvred his hand into the gap and took hold of the handle of the window. _Easy!_ Cal thought in triumph, and pulled the handle down to open it.

Immediately, he felt sharp pain as several bits of jagged glass bit into his wrist. Cal swore loudly and checked his pockets again for tissues, but contraceptives were still his only option – either that or finding something in the house to wrap around his cut. They must have toilet paper at the very least.

He pulled the handle of the window just slightly: enough to open it. Then he brought his hand, along with the bleeding wrist, carefully back through the hole. Once this was done, he put his hand on the window frame and pushed it wide open.

The window was a couple of feet up from the floor, but Cal was sure-footed. Unfortunately, he was also tall, and it proved to be far from easy, getting himself through the window. He pulled the bottom of his shirt up over his wrist, aware that his cut was dripping onto the floor. Luckily, it wasn't carpeted under the window, but there was a large rug spread over most of the room and Cal didn't want to bleed on that.

He called out a couple of times, hoping to alert any occupants to his presence rather than come upon them unexpectedly, but there was still no response to his words.

The room Cal was in had clearly been ransacked. Several cupboards were open, many with their contents spilled over the floor. Drawers were left half-open with papers sticking out and the cushions had been removed from the sofa and armchairs. Cal felt a surge of anger towards those who'd caused it. He wasn't in the least tidy himself, but he felt desperately sorry for those whose home had been torn apart and was experiencing a most uncharacteristic urge to return everything to its correct place – but he knew that everything should be left as it was as the owners would surely want to phone the police.

Cal walked carefully through the room and out into the hall. There were several doors leading off it, as well as a flight of stairs. Cal looked into the kitchen and was pleased to discover a roll of kitchen roll. He tore off several squares and wrapped it around his wrist, applying firm pressure in an effort to stem the bleed.

As he did so, he looked around, noting the number of open cupboards, and the hurried, untidy way in which the contents seemed to have been pushed back inside. Two more downstairs rooms were found in a similar state, but again, there was no sign of either resident or perpetrator. As he climbed the stairs, he called out again, but he'd almost given up hope of a reply now. He searched the upstairs rooms quickly, too concerned about who he might find for a more careful look, but although the upstairs rooms were in a similar state to those downstairs, it was clear to Cal that nobody was here.

Cal had to admit he was glad that the burglar had left. He liked to think he was strong, confident and afraid of very little, but the prospect of coming face to face with possibly more than one criminal was not one he relished. If his doctor's instinct hadn't been so anxious about possible casualties, he admitted to himself that he probably wouldn't have entered the house at all.

Cal began to search for a phone. The discovery of what had happened here only increased the importance of finding it. First, he would phone Ariel, as she would be upset and worried by his failure to appear, and then he would report the crime. He knew that his own presence in the house would arouse questions, but he decided the best way to get around that would be to neglect to mention his being inside the house at all. It would only distract the police from their true purpose and could delay the arrest of the real villain to such an extent that it might be impossible to find him.

There seemed to be no phone in the bedroom he was in. He moved into the next bedroom and again made a search. This was made more difficult by the mess in the room – Cal, as the owner of a messy room himself, suspected it had been a tip even before it had been entered unlawfully – but he kept going.

He was about to leave the room empty-handed when he heard the opening of the front door and voices in the hall.


	47. Chapter 47

**X-Sammii-X** , thank you for your review. I love Cal's impulsiveness too and it's good he practises safe sex - though as this story proves, accidents can happen. Ethan might make a better birth partner than Cal - he'll be less panicky - but Cal will regret it if he misses the birth. I'm so glad you're enjoying the story.

 **westlife4ever** , Cal is definitely in a lot of trouble. With Ariel, with Ethan - and now probably with the police too! Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , it is good Cal practises safe sex - not that it was very effective on the night he met Ariel! Ironically, Ethan would probably have been much less calm if Ariel wasn't in labour - it's not just Cal with a doctor's instincts. Thank you for your review.

 **CBloom2** , thank you for your review. Ethan will have even more reason than usual to be annoyed with his brother! Poor Cal: he's actually been really responsible lately, but he went off in a strop at just the wrong moment.

* * *

Ethan tried not to show any signs of pain as Ariel squeezed his hand tightly. He doubted she had any idea that she was hurting him – and besides, he wasn't in nearly as much pain as she was.

"Well done," he said softly once the contraction was over and she was leaning against his shoulder, her eyes closed. He checked his watch and noted the time, but he decided to give her a few moments to rest before he said anything. Ethan's arm slipped around her of its own volition and he tried to fight a sudden inward trembling.

"Is it supposed to hurt this much, Ethan?" Her voice was soft and tremulous.

Ethan felt an answering stab of pain in his chest. "I'm afraid so, but once we get to the hospital, you'll be able to have oxygen and pain relief," he said.

Ariel lifted her head and looked up at Ethan, her eyes wide. "Ethan, I'm scared. How can something so natural and so right be so painful?"

Ethan could have answered her question literally, explaining the physical process of giving birth, but he knew that wasn't really what she wanted to know. "The babies have to be secure in the uterus. So when the time does come for them to make their entrance into the world, they have to break through all the security measures."

He cringed as he heard his words, but Ariel was smiling. "So my babies are breaking out of jail?"

Ethan smiled too. "In a sense, though it's an extremely lovely, comfortable jail, and they both have their own personal five-star restaurant."

Ariel giggled. "You're funny, Ethan. I forgot how funny you were."

"We're family now," said Ethan. "So I'll probably remind you frequently."

"I'm looking forward to it," said Ariel. "I'm glad we're… that you don't… um, how far apart were the last contractions?"

"Six minutes," said Ethan.

* * *

Terror coursed through Cal. He didn't know what to do. In entering the house, his main purpose had been to help anyone who might have suffered as a result of the burglary, but he saw now that this explanation was weak and he wouldn't blame the home owners for disbelieving him.

They would soon know that their home had been entered unlawfully – and not long after that, they would find an intruder in the house. They would jump to the obvious conclusion and there was little, if anything, Cal could say to defend himself.

His first thought was to hide, perhaps under the bed, but he realised immediately how futile this exercise would be. Even if he did manage to remain undetected; if neither the family nor the police – for they would certainly be called in – discovered his hiding place, there was no telling how long he would have to remain concealed. The house might not be empty again for days and Cal would need food, not to mention the use of a bathroom. If he did not reveal his presence now, he would almost certainly have to do so later.

There was no running away this time.

Downstairs, the voices suddenly broke off and there was a long silence. Cal guessed they had discovered the state of the house and he felt an ache of sympathy as he thought what a shock it must be for them. After a while, he heard voices again, but these were softer. Cal trembled at the thought of descending the stairs: not only was he terrified of what this would bring for him, he knew it was likely to terrify the occupants of the house to hear his footsteps. They would have no way of knowing that he'd entered to help them. They might even fear he was armed.

Slowly, his footfalls as quiet as they could be, he made his way out of the bedroom, but the floorboards creaked beneath his feet and again he sensed a sudden quietening below. He imagined a family, immobilised with terror, and berated himself for entering the house. He'd tried to help, but all he'd done was bring fear.

He heard movement from downstairs again. Perhaps they would leave and drive off to the police station, allowing Cal to make his escape, but he knew he couldn't count on that and despite his fears for himself, he wanted to reassure them they were in no danger and that the real perpetrator was gone.

But they couldn't take his word for anything. All they knew was that he was prepared to enter a house that was not his own. As usual, he'd done completely the wrong thing and all he could do was hope Ethan wasn't too angry to come and rescue him again.

* * *

As the latest contraction faded, Ethan squeezed Ariel's hand and spoke in a gentle voice. "Ariel, your last contractions were five minutes apart, so we need to go now. Are you sure you have everything you need in your bag?"

Ariel nodded. Her face was slightly flushed and she was shaking. "I think so. I've got clothes for me and the baby; nappies; baby car seat; food and drink for me and Cal; my mp3 player; toiletries... is there anything else I need?"

Ethan tried to remember occasions when he'd delivered babies, but that was always in emergencies and usually, the babies were delivered because the mother's life was at risk. This meant that the mothers were usually not prepared and hadn't brought everything they needed with them, but he obviously knew enough about the process of birth to have some idea of what might help. "Do you have a water spray?"

"It's in the fridge," said Ariel, with a grateful smile. She touched his arm. "Thanks for reminding me."

Ethan stood up. "I'll get it for you."

Ariel looked for a moment as though she might have protested, but then she smiled. "Thank you, Ethan. I'm not that good at bending down at the moment."

"But you have a very good reason for that," said Ethan.

"Two very good reasons," said Ariel, smiling.

He went to get it, feeling guilty for the relief he felt at temporarily breaking the physical contact between them. He remembered the exact location of the fridge and moved towards it without thinking about it. The realisation that he knew the flat so well brought another pang, which he tried to ignore.

"It's in the door," called Ariel.

Ethan found it easily. He put it into Ariel's bag and then picked it up, putting the strap over his shoulder. The fact it was a One Direction bag didn't bother him. He had far too many other things to worry about.

He smiled at her, aware of butterflies in his stomach. "Shall we go?"

Ariel looked up at him and her eyes began to sparkle. "They're coming, aren't they, Ethan? They really are coming?"

"They really are," said Ethan, as he extended his hand to help her up. "And I know you're going to be wonderful."

* * *

As Cal slowly rounded the bend in the stairs, he became aware of four terrified faces looking up at them. A mother, a father, a son and a daughter. The children looked like teenagers. Cal lifted his hands to show he was carrying no weapons and caught sight of the blood-soaked kitchen roll on his wrist, realising that suggested guilt rather than innocence.

"I'm so sorry for scaring you," said Cal. "I don't expect you to believe me, but I'm Dr Caleb Knight. My car broke down a couple of miles down the road and I don't have my phone with me. I thought there was someone in the house because there was a car here and when nobody answered the door, I was worried. I went round to the back and found the back window smashed. I was concerned someone might be hurt, so I decided to enter your house. I promise you I'm not responsible for this and the only thing I could be considered to have stolen is this piece of kitchen roll."

The woman moved to the foot of the stairs. Her arms were folded and her mouth in a thin line. "We did pass a broken-down car. You forgot to put the hazard lights on."

"Oh. Um… sorry," said Cal.

"You know, I can't decide if you're an extraordinarily stupid burglar or if you're quite a clever one who's just pretending to be stupid."

Cal smiled at her and spoke as charmingly as he could. "Oh, I'm not a burglar at all, but it probably was stupid of me to come into the house. I'll wait till the police arrive if you like."

The woman looked him up and down. "I don't think I want you in the house with my children. So I'm going to ask you to leave. If you are who you say you are and you are telling the truth, I'm sure you'll be happy to wait outside and speak to the police when they arrive. If not, I'm sure you'll take the opportunity to make your escape, but I know what you look like and I know the number plate of your car too. DR83 CAL."

"I'm glad I'm not a burglar," said Cal ingratiatingly. "Or I really would be absolutely terrified."

"You probably should be terrified," said the woman bitingly. "If you know what's good for you." She stood back from the stairs. "Off you go, _doctor_."

Cal walked down the rest of the stairs. As he passed the woman, he glanced at her face, but he had a feeling she was unimpressed with him. He looked over her shoulder at the man, who was standing protectively in front of the two children. "I don't suppose I could use your phone?" he asked the man meekly. "I'm supposed to be meeting my girlfriend for dinner. I'd like to let her know what's happened."

"No!" said the woman sharply. "Out."

"Sorry," said the man. "But my wife is right. We need to consider our children."

Cal nodded as he remembered his own children. "To be honest, I'd feel the same. I'll wait out the front."

As he left the house, he heard the girl saying: "I don't think he is the burglar. He's fit."

"I think he's the burglar!" said her brother. "But you know me. I like a bad boy." He paused. "Did you see those muscles?"

"How could I miss them? Oh my God!"

The door slammed shut before Cal could hear more.


	48. Chapter 48

**X-Sammii-X** , I think I'd be tempted to keep Cal too! It is good that Ariel is accepting Ethan's help and so far, Ethan has been able to cope. Cal and Ethan both deserve to be happy with the girl they love... but it's impossible! Thank you for your review.

 **Bonnie Sveen Fan** , thank you for your review. I definitely have to agree about Ethan's sweetness and Cal's muscles! Ethan actually might be a better person to look after Ariel than Cal - I can imagine Cal panicking!

 **Tanith Panic** , it's not the end of the incident for Cal at all! I'm glad you like the brother and sister both fancying Cal. Ethan is very sweet - he always tries to explain things clearly, but I don't think I've ever heard him being patronising. Thank you for your review.

 **Guest** , thank you for your review. I update this story every four days, so the next update will be Thursday. I write a lot of stories so it's difficult to update more often. I hope you'll come back and read more.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. I'm so glad you like Ethan's emotions - I hope there will be more in this chapter! Cal is going to have a very hard time. The presence of the car will help as you say, but he's in a bit of trouble!

* * *

Ethan kept his arm around Ariel as he helped her down the stairs. The fact she was about to give birth went some way towards distracting him from the heartbreak of touching her and knowing she would never be his.

At least, not unless Cal did something really terrible and broke her heart - and Ethan found he didn't want that. He wanted her to be happy, even if that meant he couldn't be.

He'd expected that the fact she was about to give birth to his brother's twins would have made it worse: another proof, if one was needed, that she could never be Ethan's. But his doctor's instincts seemed to have come to the fore, temporarily numbing any other feelings.

But that didn't mean it wasn't still there. It was there at every moment when he allowed himself to think about it. The fact that he was here, supporting Ariel, while Cal had disappeared - but once again, it was Cal who would get the girl, leaving Ethan alone.

He concentrated on the steepness of the stairs instead, and on ensuring Ariel was safe. Ethan felt a bit wobbly, especially when he looked down, but he didn't doubt it was worse for Ariel.

Still, he tried to sound as confident as he could. "It's going to be okay, Ariel. We're nearly there."

"I hope you're talking about the stairs and not the birth!" said Ariel breathlessly.

"So do I!" said Ethan, but then he quickly reassured her. "It's all right. The babies aren't coming quite yet. You'll be fine - and whatever happens, you have a doctor who's trained in how to deliver a baby and deal with any emergency."

"I hope there won't be any emergencies," said Ariel, a bit breathlessly.

Ethan smiled a bit sadly and wished he could comfort her with a kiss. "It's very unlikely. Everything's been straightforward so far."

Ariel glanced at him. "I'm glad you're here, Ethan. Thank you for coming."

"Of course I'm here," said Ethan.

He'd have climbed a mountain for her if she'd asked him.

He might even have climbed a ladder.

Ariel didn't speak again till they were at the bottom. "Do you think your friend Max has had any luck?"

"I'm sure he'd have phoned us if he had," said Ethan, before realising that wasn't very reassuring. "Max knows Cal pretty well. He'll know all the places he's most likely to find him, but it might take him a bit of time."

Ariel put her hand against the wall and breathed. "Sorry, can I have a rest?"

"Yes, of course," said Ethan at once. "As long as you need."

Ariel's gaze was focused on the floor. "Ethan… Cal wouldn't be with… I feel bad for even thinking about it… but do you think… there wouldn't be _anyone else_ , would there?"

"You don't have to worry about that," said Ethan. At one time, Cal's response to any kind of setback was to go off and find himself a girl for the night, but Ethan didn't think that was likely. Not since Taylor – and especially not since Ariel. "Cal loves you. He really does. I've never seen him like this before."

The only concern for Ethan was whether Cal would still love Ariel after the numerous pints of beer he was pouring down his throat, but he hoped Max would find him before then.

"Okay… I'm ready to go now," said Ariel. "Thanks for letting me rest."

"It was my pleasure. I mean, you're welcome." Ethan opened the door. Outside was a man, pressing repeatedly on the buzzer. Beside the road, was a large van. Two more men were standing at the back of it, unloading boxes. Ethan held the door open. "Would you like to go inside?"

"We would, but we can't get any answer from the flat. Flat 36, we want. Ariel Hennessey."

Ariel gasped so loudly, Ethan thought it was another contraction for a minute. "It's my baby furniture," she said. "But I didn't order this much… I'm sure I didn't!"

Ethan put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "I'm afraid I have to take Ariel to hospital – she's having the babies – but I can run up and unlock the flat for you."

The delivery man folded his arms. "We don't carry items upstairs. It's against health and safety. There's no lift?"

"No, I'm afraid not," said Ethan.

"Then you'll have to manage yourselves," said the delivery man. He looked Ethan up and down. "I hope you're stronger than you look!"

Ethan looked at the increasing number of boxes in dismay. "I'm very sorry, but we can't take the boxes upstairs now. I need to take Ariel to the hospital."

"Not my problem, mate," said the delivery man. "Not my babies, are they?" He signalled to the other two men. "Bring them all over here."

"But you can't!" said Ethan, trying not to panic. "You can't leave them here. It would cause an obstruction. Please can you help me carry them up to the flat? If you do injure yourself, you can come to the ED with us and I'll see to it that you're seen immediately."

"Sorry. Even if I did feel like accepting that very... tempting offer, it's not part of my job description." He started to walk back to the van. "Good luck with the birth."

"Thank you," said Ethan, wondering if he'd ever said the words with less gratitude.

Ariel watched as the boxes were carried over. "I'm not sure they'd all fit in the flat anyway," she said in a bewildered voice. "Why are there so many? I'm sure I didn't buy that much!" She looked at Ethan, her eyes wide with confusion. "I don't understand, Ethan. Do you think I've got someone else's order by mistake?"

With any other girl, Ethan might have suspected a simple case of shopaholism, but he knew Ariel was careful with money – and he also knew his brother. "I think Cal might be able to tell us something about that."

* * *

Cal was getting desperate. The police still weren't here and he knew the chances were they'd want to take him to the police station. It would all take time and meanwhile, Ariel would be wondering what had happened to him.

She'd never trust him again.

The thought of losing Ariel terrified him more than the thought of the police.

He considered knocking on the door and asking to use the phone, but he knew what the answer would be. All he could do was wait – and hope and pray she would still be his girlfriend by the end of the day.

 _How could I have been so stupid?_ _Why did I have to go running off in a huff just because Ethan... oh God, I don't even remember what Ethan did now! Why do I always do this? I'm going to be a dad soon. How could I be so_ irresponsible _?_

The last was a question he'd asked himself that so many times over the years – and Ethan had probably asked it even more times - but Cal never seemed to learn.

He paced up and down the drive, only to walk into one of the cars and set the alarm off. Cal groaned and dragged his hands through his hair. Everything was going wrong and he couldn't even ask Ethan to come and sort it out for him.

The front door opened. Cal was glad to see it was the man and not the woman. "Sorry, mate. I was pacing and I walked into your car."

The man came over to him. "It's okay. It's very easy to do." He disabled the alarm and looked at Cal for a moment. "You're still here then."

Cal nodded. "I promise it wasn't me who broke into the house. I just wanted to help and I didn't think it through properly."

"Well, we'll just have to wait and see what the police say," said the man noncommittally. "I haven't had many dealings with the police, but I think they're quite fair on the whole."

"I, um, I don't suppose I could use your phone?" said Cal.

The man hesitated, clearly not completely sure if he could trust Cal.

It smarted, but Cal couldn't really blame him. He pulled his wallet out of his pocket. "How about you look after this for me while I use your phone?"

The man handed over his phone quite happily after that. Cal took it gratefully and automatically started looking for the contacts list, but then he stopped.

This wasn't his phone – so Ariel's number wouldn't be in it.

Cal squeezed his eyes shut as he tried to remember what it was, but he just wasn't sure. But that was okay: he'd phone Ethan and ask him to get in touch with Ariel. He'd probably want to spend five minutes nagging Cal about it, but he'd be happy to postpone it if Cal explained he was using someone else's phone.

But what was Ethan's number?

The trouble with mobile numbers was that they were all so long and you never entered the whole thing. At least, Cal didn't. He always went through his contacts like any sensible person.

 _Yes_ , thought Cal. _I'm a sensible person. So I should be able to work out what to do._

 _A landline. I must know someone with a landline._

Then a number came into his head. The reception at the hospital.

Noel would help him, he was sure. Louise probably wouldn't have done, but she was a nurse now.

Cal quickly dialled the number, remembering the Holby code.

"Hello. Holby City Emergency Department. How can I help you?"

It wasn't Noel: it was some agency woman. But she would do. "Hi, this is Dr Knight. Would it be possible for you to give Dr Hardy a message for me?"

"Who's Dr Hardy?" said the girl. "Who are you?"

"We're both registrars," said Cal. "ED doctors, I mean. Check with Noel if you don't believe me. Or pass the phone over to him."

"Mr Garcia is busy with a patient at the moment," said the girl, who had perfected her 'bored telephone operator' voice. "Can I take a message?"

"Yes. Please tell Ethan – I mean Dr Hardy – that I've had car trouble and I'm about to assist the police with enquiries regarding a break-in so I'm going to be late for dinner with Ariel."

"Okay, your car's broken down and you've been arrested and you're having dinner with someone who's named after washing powder," said the girl. "If I can find out who Dr Hardy is, I'll pass the message on."

"No, I haven't actually been arrest-" began Cal, but he was talking to a dialling tone.

It looked like Ethan was going to kill him whether he got the message or not.


	49. Chapter 49

**Bonnie Sveen Fan** , Cal doesn't always help himself, but bad luck seems to follow him around. Especially when I'm the one writing about him! It is horrible for Ariel, but Ethan is coping well... so far. Thank you for your review.

 **westlife4ever80** , Cal seems to spend his whole life in holes of one description or another! But this is one time he really needs tp be very quick about getting out. Thank you for your review.

 **X-Sammii-X** , Ariel is certainly fond of both of them and Ethan has shown he's better than Cal at pushing his feelings aside and doing what needs to be done. Cal really would be gutted to miss the birth. Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , thank you for your review. I'm sure there are nice delivery men, though I haven't met any, but I don't want to get Cal out of that particular mess too easily! The temp receptionist probably did the same customer service course as Louise.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. Cal is having a terrible time and he doesn't even know what he's in danger of missing! But I'm sure he won't give up that easily and neither will Ethan.

* * *

Ethan didn't know what to do. He'd taken a few of the smaller items up to Ariel's flat, but he couldn't carry the others alone and Ariel needed to go to the hospital.

"Do you have any neighbours who might be able to help?" he asked urgently.

Ariel shook her head. "I don't really know any of my neighbours. There are a few who say hello to me, but it's never gone beyond that and I'm not even sure where they live." She was leaning against the wall, one hand held against the small of her back. She hadn't made the smallest complaint, but Ethan knew he couldn't keep her waiting any longer.

"We need to get you to hospital," he said. "I'll move a couple of things inside, but the rest will have to stay out here or we'll end up blocking the stairs. I'll write notes to explain what's happened."

He leaned on one of the boxes as he scribbled two quick notes – one to leave with the furniture outside and one to take inside.

"Okay: that's done," said Ethan. "Let's go."

He helped her over to the car. He felt her gasping with pain as another contraction hit and he rubbed her back, hoping it would help.

"Come on. Let's walk," said Ethan, as that had seemed to help Ariel more than staying still.

Ariel stopped walking and stared at him. "You want to walk to the… oh my God, that hurts… you want to walk to the hospital? Are you absolutely crazy, Ethan?"

Ethan flinched slightly, but he'd heard much, much worse from women in labour. "I just thought we could walk till the contraction has passed."

"Oh, you thought that, did you?" said Ariel loudly. "Well, I'm the one having a baby and I say we go to the hospital and get me some pain relief! Okay?"

"Oh, yes. Of course," said Ethan, and helped her into the car. Ariel hit her head on the car ceiling, which she said was Ethan's fault (and it might well have been, Ethan allowed), and blamed him again when her water bottle fell out of her bag. Ethan was fairly sure that wasn't his fault as he wasn't in the car at the time, but he apologised, picked it up for her and told her everything was going to be all right.

"How do you know that?" demanded Ariel. "You're a doctor, not a psychic!"

"You're right. I'm sorry," said Ethan.

Ariel glared at him. "Are you going to start driving or not?"

Ethan started driving.

A few seconds later, he saw Ariel relax back against the car seat. "Ethan, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean any of that. You've been so kind to me and I was horrible to you."

"Don't worry," said Ethan, and smiled at her. "It's perfectly normal. You're in pain and you're scared and it probably was my fault you hit your head."

"No, it wasn't," said Ariel. "I'm sorry, Ethan."

"Please don't apologise," said Ethan. "I'm a doctor. I've heard so much worse from patients with much less reason to complain. Don't give it another thought – and feel free to say whatever you like when the next contraction comes along."

Ariel gave a weak smile. "You're probably safe for four minutes."

Ethan smiled back. "It really is all right."

* * *

Cal swallowed nervously as the police car squeezed into the drive. They looked at him curiously as they got out. This interested Cal: their reaction suggested they knew he wasn't one of the family, yet friends of the family were not generally invited to wait outside the house.

Cal decided it might be as well to introduce himself.

He walked across to them, smiling in an attempt to hide his terror. He could only hope it was convincing. "Hi, I'm Dr Caleb Knight. You might have seen my car down the road – DR83 CAL. Apparently, I forgot my hazard lights and I apologise for that."

"Yes, we saw the car, sir," said one of the policeman. "It's quite a way down the road."

"I left my phone at home," said Cal, and went on to explain how he'd found the house and what he'd done on arrival. "I know it looks bad and the family were understandably concerned I'm the intruder. They didn't want me in the house so I said I'd wait out here."

The policeman nodded. "Thanks for sticking around, Dr Knight. It makes our job easier. We've already had a look at your car and we know it's in your name, so there are no problems with that." The policeman gave a slight smile. "I'm sure we can find out which breakdown cover provider you're with, so you can sort that out at the station."

"Thank you," said Cal. "I'm glad _someone_ doesn't think I'm a burglar."

"Well, burglars do come in all shapes and sizes, but they tend to have reliable getaway cars and they don't usually hang around and wait for the police," said the policeman. "Of course, there is a lot of procedure we've got to work through before we can let you get back to your girlfriend, but I'm sure it's exactly the same in the medical profession."

Cal admitted they did have a lot of procedure. "Do you think anyone at the station could find out my girlfriend's number for me?"

"Are you living together?"

Cal shook his head.

"We can't give you her number as we only have your word for it that she's your girlfriend. We would have to speak to her ourselves and see if she's willing to confirm the relationship. Alternatively, if you're happy for us to contact your brother instead, we could get that done more quickly. I'm sure it can all be sorted out in a couple of hours."

"Thank you," said Cal gratefully. Ariel would be disappointed and it looked like they weren't going to have dinner together after all, but not much was likely to go wrong in the next two hours.

"Now, if you could also provide us with your address and a few more details and show us some ID if you have any – just a matter of routine - my colleague here will take you to the station while I have a quick chat to the family. I'm afraid we will have to take your fingerprints as they probably are all over the house, but we'll be doing the same with the family and taking fingerprints is as much a matter of elimination as anything."

"That's okay," said Cal. "I'm actually quite excited about having my fingerprints taken."

The policeman laughed. "Well, it might not have been the evening you had in mind, Dr Knight – but it's good to see you taking everything so positively. I'll see you back at the station."

* * *

Ethan wasn't sure he'd ever been more terrified. His heart was pounding so loudly in his ears, he was almost surprised Ariel hadn't heard it. He'd driven this route before, but it was different now. He knew all the careful driving in the world wouldn't necessarily prevent a crash. He eyed every car he saw with trepidation and panicked when he saw a pedestrian standing by the side of the world, ready to cross.

Every moment, he saw some fresh danger to Ariel and the babies and he couldn't prevent his mind from flickering back to the day he'd been driving the minibus to the conference, not knowing that they wouldn't get there; not knowing that one person wouldn't get out alive.

"Ethan, are you okay?" said Ariel.

He half-glanced towards her, not daring to take his eyes off the road for longer. Even so, it was enough to see the concern in her eyes. "I'm fine. I'm just a little bit nervous because… well, because it's so important. _You're_ important."

"Ethan, I'm sorry," whispered Ariel. "For everything."

Ethan knew she didn't mean the shouting this time. He stared through the windscreen as sadness settled upon his shoulders. "There's no need to apologise. I'm glad I was here and able to help."

"I wouldn't have blamed you if you hadn't come." Ariel's voice was barely audible, but it still seemed to hurt his ears.

"I would have blamed myself terribly," said Ethan truthfully. "Whatever might have happened in the past, Ariel, we're family. You're my brother's girlfriend and your children are my niece and nephew."

"I didn't mean to lead you on," whispered Ariel.

Ethan allowed himself to glance away from the road ahead long enough to give her a quick smile. "You didn't. You didn't know you were going to see Cal again, or that your feelings would still be so strong."

"I did care about you," said Ariel. "I still do. I didn't think there was a better man than you or anyone I could care for more. I did care about Cal and I was heartbroken when he didn't call me, but I thought the Cal I'd fallen in love with wasn't real."

Ethan felt a lump in his throat. He wanted to scream at her to stop it, but he knew she wasn't trying to hurt him. She was trying to make him feel better, but how could he feel better when he knew he'd only ever been second choice?

"I'm sorry, Ethan. I'm making it worse, aren't I?" Ariel sounded sad. "So let's change the subject."

"Um, have you thought about names for the babies?" said Ethan randomly.

"Cal suggested Liam Niall and Louisa Harriet," said Ariel.

Ethan chuckled softly despite his sadness. "I can guess why he chose those names. But I like them. Perhaps there is one very small positive about Shane leaving – five names into two babies really doesn't go."

"Zayn," said Ariel.

"I'm sorry?"

"The guy who left One Direction is called Zayn."

"Of course he is. I'm so sorry."

"That is an interesting problem, though," said Ariel. "I suppose I'd have had to have triplets! Zayn Caleb, perhaps."

Ethan smiled. "Cal would absolutely love that."

"Then maybe we'll have to have…" Ariel stopped.

"More children?" said Ethan through an aching throat. "That would be lovely. I'm sure Cal would like that."

Another contraction gripped Ariel and Ethan stopped the car by the side of the road so he could help her through it.

"On second thoughts," panted Ariel, "maybe two is as much as I can handle!"


	50. Chapter 50

**westlife4ever80** , thank you for your review. Cal probably does have a bit of time as babies often aren't in a hurry, but he would be devastated to miss it.

 **X-Sammii-X** , although Cal is an adult, he does have a little-boy side to him so I could imagine him enjoying something like having his fingerprints taken! But for Ethan, the positives are much more difficult to find. Thank you for your review.

 **Bonnie Sveen Fan** , I could imagine Ethan worrying about crashing when the car journey is so important and that reminded me of the minibus crash. I like the name Louisa. I prefer Louise, but there's already a Louise in Casualty. Thank you for your review.

 **Guest** , thank you for your review. Here's one more chapter and there should be another on Friday. I hope you're enjoying the story.

 **Tanith Panic** , I think Cal could charm pretty much anyone if he put his mind to it! I remember even Louise was sending adoring looks his way when he took his clothes off. I think being in doctor mode probably helps Ethan to cope. Thank you for your review and I'm happy you like the names.

 **Elliebelle4444** , although I don't feel as strongly about it as you, I do feel the possible impact famous names could have on their children is one of many serious discussions Cal and Ariel really need to have – at the moment, they're caught up in the magic of finding each other and falling in love again and they've kind of forgotten the reality of their situation. The difficulty with writing about irresponsible characters is that the readers don't know if the characters are the ones at fault or if the writer is being unbelievably stupid. I personally wouldn't want to name my children after celebrities or Disney princesses as I'd be too worried about the impact on the child (though the right decision won't be the same for every couple), but that's not to say I'm never unbelievably stupid. If only! Thank you for your review. I'm glad you're enjoying the rest of the story.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. I think having a sympathetic policeman probably will help Cal - he really was due some luck! But all he - and Ethan - can really do now is sit and wait. I'm glad you like the names.

 _Thank you to **Elliebelle4444** for the follow._

* * *

Ethan parked in the ED car park out of habit and took Ariel into the ED. He saw Big Mcc and asked if he could possibly have a wheelchair; Big Mac agreed at once and quickly found one.

"Thanks, Mac. We're on our way to maternity," said Ethan. "I don't know why we came this way."

"You're probably not in the best situation for thinking clearly," said Big Mac, though he was looking at Ethan curiously. "It's nearly time to meet your niece and nephew then?"

Ethan couldn't help smiling. Cal was an idiot, but it was nice to think he'd been telling everyone about his impending fatherhood. "Yes. Currently known as Louisa Harriet and Liam Niall, though this could change. And this is Cal's girlfriend, Ariel. Ariel, meet Big Mac, one of our healthcare assistants."

They exchanged pleasantries, with Big Mac assuring Ariel that the maternity unit was very nice and they would look after her. "Not that I've ever been there personally, you understand. I might look pregnant, but I'm not!"

"If the people who work in maternity are half as kind as you, I'm sure I'll be very comfortable," said Ariel.

"And if my patients are half as nice as you, I'm in for a very good shift," said Big Mac.

They were passing reception when Noel called out to Ethan.

"Ethan, was about to call you. I think I've got a message for you. It's a bit garbled, but it's more likely to be you than anyone else. Ditsy here took the message."

"My name is _Mitzi_!"said the overly-painted and clearly-not-natural blonde sitting beside him. "You really do need to learn to listen, Joel."

"That's what I said," said Noel innocently. "Apparently, someone called Hal left a message for Dr Vardy saying his car broke down and he's been arrested and he can't have dinner with Percy."

"Not Percy. _Persil_!" said Mitzi.

"Um, I think he probably said Ariel," said Ethan. He spoke calmly and politely, but he actually wanted to scream. Loudly. Repeatedly. And possibly punch something. Ideally, his brother.

Mitzi waved a dismissive hand. "Persil… Ariel… what's the difference?"

"Do you know where Cal called from?" asked Ethan as politely as he could. "He left his phone behind. I'm very anxious to get in touch with him as his girlfriend's in labour."

Noel looked doubtful. "I'll have a look at the log and give you a call when I know something, but some numbers are withheld."

"Thank you: it would be a great help if you could check," said Ethan. "We'll be in maternity, but my phone will be on."

* * *

Cal sat in one of the interview rooms, tapping his foot and if not quite literally tearing his hair out, at least making a complete mess of it.

The policeman who'd driven him to the station had gone back to the house. In the meantime, all Cal could do was wait and not even the attractive young policewoman who'd been asked to keep an eye on him could make him feel any better.

He wasn't interested in her. She wasn't Ariel.

The policewoman probably wasn't interested in him either. At one time, Cal would have taken her friendly smiles and politeness as a sign she was desperate to go to bed to him, but it seemed no more than friendliness and politeness today.

 _Perhaps I only ever see what I want to see_ , thought Cal.

Unfortunately, that wasn't completely true because the only thing he wanted to see now was Ariel sitting opposite him at dinner and he wasn't sure when he was likely to see that again. Cal wanted to believe he had a good excuse – after all, everyone left their phones at home sometimes. But driving off in a strop when he had a dinner engagement and then failing to notice a warning light on his car… now that was stupid.

"Are you sure you couldn't try to find Ethan's number for me while I'm waiting?" said Cal desperately. It crossed his mind that he could always flirt with her. Without being arrogant, he had known girls who really were prepared to do anything for him.

But he didn't want to try. It was wrong and he just didn't want to.

"I'm sorry," said the policewoman. "As I said before, I can't leave you alone and I don't have access to the information here. I'm sure the others will be back soon though."

"How about if I go with you?" said Cal. "You said you'd go with me if I made a phone call, so why can't I go with you while you find the information?"

The policewoman smiled, but she shook her head. "I would if I could. I can see it's important to you. But I can't. I'm sorry."

"Couldn't you call someone on your radio?"

"I could if I felt I was in physical danger," said the policewoman. "But I _really_ don't recommend it, Dr Knight. I'm afraid you'll just have to be patient."

* * *

Ethan had just helped Ariel into bed and ensured she was comfortable when the midwife arrived. She was probably ten years or so older than Ethan and she looked very kind. Ethan immediately felt less out of his depth. Whatever happened with Cal, Ariel would be looked after.

She smiled at both of them and Ethan saw pleased recognition on Ariel's face.

"Hi, Ariel. I wasn't expecting you quite this early, but it's good to see you. You remember me, don't you? I'm Nina." She turned to Ethan. "Are you Dad?"

"Um, no, I'm Uncle," said Ethan, rather flustered by the assumption. He held out his hand. "Ethan Hardy. Pleased to meet you. We really hope Cal – he's the dad - will get here soon, but he went out without his phone and we haven't been able to get hold of him." He suddenly remembered something. "Actually, if you could just excuse me for five minutes while I phone a friend of ours who's looking for Cal?"

Nina nodded. "Of course, Ethan. That's not a problem. I'll examine Ariel while you're gone."

"Thank you." Ethan patted Ariel's shoulder. "I'm just going to call Max, but I'll be as quick as I can."

He left the cubicle and went out into the corridor, trying not to finch as almost inhuman-sounding groans of pain came to his ears. He stopped walking momentarily as panic filled him. He saw and heard patients in pain every day, but he hated the thought of it happening to Ariel.

Max answered straight away. "Hey, Ethan. Sorry. I haven't found him yet. Neither have Lofty or Robyn, but we'll keep looking. How's Ariel doing?"

"Scared and in pain, of course, but everything is progressing as expected as far as I can see," said Ethan. "The midwife's with her now. But I know where Cal is."

"You do? That's great," said Max. He sounded relieved. "Is he on his way?"

"Not exactly – and he doesn't know about Ariel," said Ethan. "He left a message with reception."

"Tell me where he is and I'll go and find him for you," said Max at once.

Ethan experienced a most uncharacteristic urge to hug him. Max could be an idiot at times, but he was good-hearted and always ready to help. "He's in a police station. I don't know which one. I'm not quite sure what he's been up to - and I'm sure only my unwillingness to leave my niece and nephew fatherless will prevent me from killing him when he does finally make an appearance - but it would be a great help if you could phone the police stations in the area and see if they can get a message to him. If he's under arrest, they might be reluctant to let him out, but there might be something that can be done under the circumstances."

"We'll do our best," promised Max. "Don't worry, Ethan. We'll get there in time even if we have to dress up in our policeman outfits and steal a car and say we're escorting Cal to the hospital."

"Um… perhaps you shouldn't go quite _that_ far," said Ethan nervously, not completely sure Max was joking. "But thank you so much for helping us. Ariel and I really appreciate it and I know Cal will too."

He said goodbye to Max and hurried back into the ward, keeping his eyes raised just in case Ariel was displaying anything he had no right to see.

"Is everything all right?" he asked anxiously.

Nina patted him on the shoulder. "Everything's fine, Ethan. It could be a few hours before Baby 1 is ready to come out, so Dad's got a bit of time to get here. I've given Ariel some pain relief and I've told her if she wants to walk around, that's fine. I'll be back every fifteen minutes to check on her and the baby, but if you're worried, there is a button here to call for help."

Ethan waited until she'd gone, then he sat on the bed beside Ariel. "How are you feeling?"

"Terrified!" said Ariel. "But I'm sure that's completely normal."

"I know I'd be terrified," said Ethan.

"I'm terrified the birth won't go well," said Ariel. "I'm terrified it will hurt too much. I'm terrified Cal won't get here in time."

Ethan had to admit he was worried about the same things, though he didn't say so. "If there are any complications, there are people here who can help. If anything happens that you're worried about, you can let me know and I'll make sure you get whatever help you need. If it does hurt, you probably can be given more pain relief, like an epidural. Then you have Entonox – gas and air - which helps more than you might think. And if Cal doesn't get here…" Ethan sighed. "I know it won't be the same. I know it's not what you want, but I am very happy to perform the birth partner duties if you'd like me to."

Ariel slipped her hand into his. "I don't know if you'll like hearing this, Ethan, but if Cal isn't here, there's no-one else I'd rather have with me than you."

 _Second-best again_ , thought Ethan sadly, but after everything that had happened; after everything he'd done, he felt lucky and grateful that she still trusted him.


	51. Chapter 51

_Thank you for all the reviews on the last chapter - it was so amazing to get so many!_

 **CBloom2** , thank you for your review. I don't think Ethan is second in my book either - I liked Cal best first, then I really couldn't decide, but now I think it's Ethan. I'm glad you feel the story is working as it is - I think Ethan probably hates this story!

 **X-Sammii-X** , Cal probably loved her first really - it's not really his fault he forgot about her. I think Ethan quite often has the feeling of wanting to kill Cal and also not wanting to! It is tough for Cal - all he wanted was to help. Thank you for your review.

 **Elliebelle4444** , thank you for your review. I'm not sure as I haven't written that far ahead, but I think they will be born in Chapter 53... I hope that's not too long to wait! I've been wondering for ages what Ariel will be like as a mum, but I think I've finally decided!

 **Tanith Panic** , don't worry - there will be no Victorian fathers in this story! I think the policewoman was warning Cal that if he steps out of line, there will be trouble! Whether Cal will actually listen is another matter. Thank you for your review.

 **Guest** , thank you for your review. Here is one new chapter for you - the next will be up on Tuesday.

 **Bonnie Sveen Fan** , thank you for your review. Big Mac isn't one of my favourite characters, but he can be very kind and I think the whole ED would want to be kind to Ariel now. Most of them like Cal, but they know his habit of running away.

 **ETWentHome** , Ethan is probably furious with Cal right now, but you're right - it will be much easier to find Cal now and pass on the message, though whether the police will let him go is another question! It is good Ethan's there for Ariel. Thank you for your review.

 **westlife4ever80** , we know Cal will be a brilliant dad, but as this is set before Matilda, you can forgive Ethan and Ariel for having doubts! Thank you for your review.

* * *

Cal couldn't keep still. He got up several times and paced around the room, unable to account for his jumpiness but equally unable to ignore it. The policewoman watched him sympathetically, but she seemed to have given up on trying to calm him. Cal was glad. He knew he wouldn't be calm until he'd seen Ariel again.

He flung himself back into his chair with a deep sigh. He had no idea what to do with himself. If there was a mirror in here, he could probably have passed the time quite happily, but there was nothing but a table and four chairs.

"When are the babies due?" asked the policewoman. She'd told Cal her name, but it had gone right out of his head.

"Not for another month," said Cal. "But twins often come early – I know it sounds like a cliché, but it is actually true – so I think next week, we'll have to start making a few decisions - like deciding where we're going to live. I can't believe we haven't actually discussed that yet, but it's all been a bit rushed. There isn't room for four of us in her flat, but moving into my flat might be awkward because it's my brother's flat. I just live there because every time he kicks me out, he takes pity on me and lets me back in."

The policewoman spared him her opinion of him, though her slightly raised eyebrows suggested she wasn't overly impressed. "Have you thought about names?"

Cal smiled as he remembered the conversation they'd had, finding the craziest and most outlandish names they could and trying them out.

Then he remembered the names they seemed to have fixed on.

That was something else they hadn't thought about properly, Cal thought with an inward groan. They hadn't really talked about anything seriously. It was like it was a game they were playing, like they were two little kids pretending to be grown-ups. Except they weren't pretending: they really were adults and the two little kids in the family weren't Cal and Ariel.

"I think we're going to call them Liam Niall and Louisa Harriet," he said at last. "After One Direction."

The policewoman gave him a shrewd look. "Your idea or hers?"

"Both of ours… well, kind of mine… but the thing is…" Cal trailed off awkwardly.

"You're having second thoughts?"

"I suppose I kind of am," said Cal. "She's a really big One Direction fan. Like seriously big. So I suggested, only half-seriously, that we call the twins after One Direction. She loved the idea and then I just kind of went along with it. I did think it would be fun at first - and they are all quite normal names: it's not like we're calling them Rihanna and Kanye. But now, I don't know what I was thinking."

The policewoman nodded. "You got caught up in the moment – but now the moment has caught up with _you_."

"Story of my life," said Cal sadly.

"It happens to everyone sometimes," said the policewoman. "The important thing is that you've worked out your true feelings before it's too late to do something about it."

Cal sighed and rested his elbows on the table, his chin in his hands. "But it is too late. Ariel loves the names. I can't just go and see her and tell her I wasn't thinking straight at the time and could we please call our kids something else."

"Why not?" asked the policewoman. "If you're going to be a family, you need to be honest with each other. You don't want to spend the next sixty years regretting the names you gave your kids."

"But I want her to be happy," said Cal. "She's named after a princess and that's how I want to treat her. She was locked in her tower – well, she was in her flat and she actually locked herself out of it, not into it, but the block of flats is like a tower – and I came along like a knight in shining armour and rescued her."

"But Caleb, isn't that just another game?" said the policewoman. "She's not a princess. She's an ordinary girl who's having two babies – though I wonder if even real princesses like to be 'treated like princesses' these days. And you're not a knight in shining armour. You're both human beings, trying to bring up a family together. Sure there's got to be give and take, but that doesn't mean that you're doing all the giving."

Cal stared at her in amazement. No-one had ever accused him of that before. Ethan had always said quite the opposite.

"Talk to her," said the policewoman. "Be honest about the way you feel. I'm not saying it won't hurt her feelings, but she loves you. I would never want my boyfriend to keep quiet about something like that for my sake and he wouldn't like it if I did it. There are some things I keep to myself – like my real opinion of his mother – but you should never keep quiet about something you're going to regret not saying later."

* * *

"Ethan, I'm so sorry," said Ariel, after a particularly strong contraction had caused her to call Ethan every name in the book, as well as a few that were completely new to him. "I never say things like that! I don't know what's wrong with me."

Ethan smiled. "You're in labour. That's what's wrong. And I always enjoy increasing my vocabulary."

"Increasing your-" Ariel closed her eyes. Ethan suspected she would have blushed if she hadn't been so flushed already.

Ethan picked up her water spray and carefully used it on her face. "It really doesn't matter at all. Please don't worry. You're really talking to the pain, not me. Would you like to go for a walk?"

"If I can manage to haul myself out of bed, I think I would like to," said Ariel. "I feel like a whale."

"Well, you don't look like one," said Ethan. He thought she looked beautiful. He tried to think of something to compare her stomach with, but he decided he wouldn't risk it. Ethan thought mountains were beautiful, but he had a feeling that telling his brother's girlfriend she looked like a mountain was not the way to ensure he got to spend lots of time with his niece and nephew.

He put his arm around Ariel, supporting her carefully as he helped her to her feet. At first, he thought he was going to be all right. After all, he'd helped so many people out of a hospital bed.

"Would you like to take my arm?" said Ethan. "You set the pace."

Ariel hesitated, then she slipped her arm tentatively through his.

Ethan felt a surge of electricity and he trembled at her touch.

Ariel looked at him in concern. "Are you okay, Ethan? You're shaking."

"I… I'm a little bit nervous about the birth," said Ethan. "Or not the birth exactly: more that Cal won't get here in time. Of course, I'm more than happy to do everything I can. But I'm not Cal."

"You're the next best thing by a long way," offered Ariel.

Ethan felt as though she'd hit him, but he managed to smile. "Thank you. I'll try my best to live up to that."

He held the curtain aside with his free arm and they went out into the corridor. Two other expectant mothers were in the corridor already. One was walking up and down, holding the arm of a woman. Another was standing with her back against the wall, breathing heavily as a man watched her with a panic-stricken look on his face.

"Okay?" said Ethan softly to Ariel. She nodded and they began to walk.

Ethan quickly adjusted his pace to Ariel's, trying not to react as her hip brushed against him. They were talking towards the couple standing by the wall. As they watched, Ethan realised the woman was looking at them. As he caught her eye, the woman smiled.

"They make a lovely couple, don't they?" she said to the man with her.

Ethan felt a lump in his throat. They might look like a lovely couple, but they weren't one.

The man's hands were balled into fists. "Are you saying we don't make a lovely couple? Is that what you're saying?"

She sighed. "Will you calm down? It's only a baby and I promise I'll let you know before it comes out so you can close your eyes."

"It's not that I don't _want_ to see it," said the man quickly. "I just don't want to make extra work for the nurses by fainting."

The woman patted his cheek affectionately. "It's okay. I know you can't help it. You're here and that's all that matters."

 _But Cal isn't here_ , thought Ethan.

"Is it your first too?" the woman asked as Ariel and Ethan passed them.

"First and second," replied Ariel.

The woman smiled. "I don't know if I should congratulate you or sympathise!"

Ariel laughed. "Perhaps a bit of both?"

The man clapped Ethan on the shoulder. "So. Are you going to shut your eyes for the big moment?"

The lump was still in Ethan's throat. He could barely see the man through the tears in his eyes.

 _Why can't I be the father? I'm the one who's here, looking after her! I'm not the one who drove off in a big strop. But I'm also not the one she loves…_

"Aw, bless him," said the woman. "He's all emotional!"

"I'm sorry," said Ethan. He felt a tear falling and brushed away as soon as it was below the level of his glasses. "I'm just.. I'm looking forward to it so much. But I'm fine."

He was almost relieved when the woman was hit by another contraction. Ariel squeezed her arm in silent sympathy, then she and Ethan turned and walked back the way they'd come, giving the couple some privacy. Ethan's eyes were full again and he longed for a moment's solitude either to fight the tears back or, if that proved impossible, to let them fall.

But he couldn't. He had to stay with Ariel. He couldn't desert her as his brother had done.

"Ethan…" Ariel looked upset too. She led him gently back into the cubicle. "Ethan, what can I do? Should I hug you? Should I go for another walk on my own?"

Ethan wanted to sink down onto the bed and weep. Instead, he helped Ariel to sit down. "I'm fine. I'm just emotional about being an uncle. I'll be fine."


	52. Chapter 52

**X-Sammii-X** , thank you for your review. I think Cal probably wants to make a lot of people happy, but either it happens off-camera (we didn't see much of Taylor or even Matilda really) or he messes it up! Ethan really would be an amazing daddy.

 **Bonnie Sveen Fan** , thank you for your review. I don't know what's worse - watching the girl you love having your brother's babies or having your babies in front of the guy who wishes they were his!

 **westlife4ever80** , I think Cal might be finally getting the message that life isn't a fairy tale with him starring as the knight in shining armour! He does need to be honest, though that doesn't always come naturally either! Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , you might have a hunch, but I don't! I'd like them both to be happy at the end, but it's going to be difficult. I'll try though. Now I'm imagining two little Rihannas toddling round the ED: Cal and Dylan's little divas! Thank you for your review.

 **CBloom2** , Cal does need to be there! There are four people in that hospital who really need him! And perhaps five, including himself, who might never forgive him if he doesn't get there. Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. If Cal was in any more of a panic, he really might end up committing a crime! Thank you - I'm so glad you like the way I write Ethan's feelings. He is usually very considerate, so I'm glad that's coming across.

* * *

Cal was pacing up and down the interview room. The policemen still hadn't got back, or at least they weren't ready to interview him. He had no idea how long he'd been there and all he knew was that Ariel would be upset and worried.

"I wish they would hurry up!" he said as he paced. "All I want is to be with my girlfriend. To talk to her about things properly. To make plans. To make sure I'm there when she needs me. But I'm stuck here and I can't do anything."

"It shouldn't be too much longer," said the policewoman comfortingly.

"I'll believe that when I see it!" said Cal.

When the knock came at the door a moment later, he was almost annoyed. He never liked being wrong and it was particularly embarrassing when it happened in front of other people.

Then he decided he would give anything (except Ariel, the twins and Ethan) to be wrong just this once.

The policewoman went to open the door. She exchanged a few words with someone, then she went outside and closed the door behind her. Cal sighed and sat back on his chair. Just for a moment, he'd thought the policemen were back so he could _finally_ get his interview and _finally_ be allowed to go home.

He looked up when the policewoman returned. She was looking worried. "Cal, do you know a guy called Max Walker?"

"Yeah: I work with him," said Cal. "At least, he's a porter in my hospital. He's a mate." He was confused. "Has Max been arrested too?"

"No. It's nothing like that," said the policewoman. "The thing is, I can't let you leave and I'm really sorry. It's not my case and I can't make any big decisions like this. All I can do is make sure the people in charge know it too and hope they'll agree to interview you as quickly as possible."

"What? What's happened?" said Cal.

The policewoman hesitated and went to sit in the chair beside him. "It's Ariel. She's all right and you've still got plenty of time and everything is going as you'd expect so far, but I'm afraid she has gone into labour."

"WHAT?"

* * *

Ethan gently wiped Ariel's forehead and smiled at her. "You're doing really well, you know. You're coping with the pain brilliantly – Cal would be so proud. I don't even want to think about the fuss he'd be making! Or the fuss I'd be making, for that matter."

Ariel just smiled, but Ethan thought she might have laughed in other circumstances.

"I'm sure everything will be fine," said Ethan. "With the babies and with Cal." Not for the first time, he wondered guiltily if he was doing the right thing in hiding the truth from Ariel. For one thing, he couldn't be sure how much of it was the truth – as Mitzi had managed to get everyone's name's wrong when she'd taken down the message from Max, it was possible Cal wasn't in a police station at all. As he was having car trouble (assuming that was correct), a train or bus station would be far more likely than a police station.

What else rhymed with station?

Castration? No. Surely not.

Damnation? Now, that was more likely, knowing Cal.

Flirtation? Ethan really hoped not.

Constipation? _I'm really not sure I want to think about that._

"Ethan?" said Ariel, looking a bit surprised. "What are you thinking about?"

"Consti- um, I mean, er… consummation… oh my goodness, no! I definitely didn't mean that."

"Conversation?" suggested Ariel.

"Yes! Conversation," said Ethan. "We should have one. So. Um. Are you looking forward to meeting little Liam Niall and Louisa Harriet?"

Ariel flinched.

"Another contraction?" said Ethan sympathetically. "I could give you a massage if you wanted me to. I've heard they can be very helpful." It wouldn't help _him_ , but that was irrelevant and if he was behind her back, she wouldn't notice if he got teary again.

"No, it's just…" Ariel hesitated. "I don't know what to do, Ethan. I've kind of got myself into a situation with Cal and I don't know how to get out of it."

Ethan absolutely hated himself for the hope that rose up inside him, but it only lasted a couple of seconds. If Ariel was going to leave Cal, that would be absolutely _terrible_. Cal would be heartbroken. Ethan knew exactly how that felt and he wasn't going to wish it on anybody. Especially not his brother. "Ariel, I know Cal's been a bit of an idiot, but he really loves you. It is natural to be upset with him. He's stood you up and he's not here at the moment when you need him most A lot of mothers rage at the fathers of their babies, even when they are present in the delivery room. But those feelings aren't real. As soon as the babies are born, the feelings usually go away. Mothers often find they love the fathers more than ever after they see what they've created together."

Ariel stared at him. "Oh! No, I don't mean I don't love Cal. I do. That's part of the problem. If I didn't love him so much, it wouldn't bother me."

"What is it?" asked Ethan as supportively as he could. "You can tell me."

Ariel looked away, focusing her gaze instead on her stomach. Her look of agitation was momentarily replaced by a smile. "It's the names," she said at last.

"The babies' names?" said Ethan.

Ariel nodded. "I love the names we've chosen. I really do. At least, I love the idea of it. But they're not two dolls or pets we're naming. They're two human beings and whatever names we give them, they're going to have to grow up with them."

Her eyes met his. She looked guilty and as though she was pleading with him to understand. Ethan leaned closer, which unsettled him a little, but he wanted to do everything he could to let her know he was here and he was listening.

"Ethan, I think my name is beautiful, but it's not an _easy_ name to have. There have always been comments about washing powder and mermaids and Shakespeare and typefaces. There probably always will be. Sometimes they upset or annoy me and sometimes I don't care. But it's not easy."

"I can imagine," murmured Ethan, wanting to encourage her but not break the flow.

"I don't want my children to grow up knowing their named after a band Mummy used to be crazy about. Can you imagine how embarrassed they're going to feel? How cruel the other children might be? If we call them Liam and Louisa with different middle names, perhaps we'll get away with it. But anyone who sees the names Liam and Niall together is going to know – and once they've made that connection, they'll see where Louisa Harriet came from too. It was fun joking about it – we thought up all sorts of crazy names and we laughed so much. But this isn't a game, Ethan. It's two human beings."

Ethan nodded slowly. He could see where Ariel was coming from and it had crossed his own mind, if only very faintly because it was none of his business. He thought all parents had the right to choose any names they wanted, within reason, and he would never try to interfere, but Ariel's point of view was valid.

"Maybe I'm being silly," said Ariel. "A lot of babies are named after celebrities – and some have much more embarrassing names. A lot of these kids will be fine. Happy. Popular. Successful. But what if it makes my children unhappy, Ethan?"

"You can't know what will happen in the future, Ariel, but you've got lots of time," said Ethan. "You have forty-two days in which to register the births. Forty-two days to get to know your children and choose the perfect names."

"Do you think I'm right then?" said Ariel.

Ethan managed to take her hand in his. "Ariel, the right answer to this question will be different for every couple and it's something you need to discuss with Cal, but for you, the right answer is to give your children different names. And that's fine. I found it difficult growing up being called Ethan – it's a very popular name now, but everyone at school thought it was a weird name and I never met another Ethan until I got my first job in a hospital and ended up treating a young boy with that name. Though I should say that it wasn't just my name – Caleb was an unusual name then too, but Cal was always much more confident than me, at least outwardly. He was cool so his unusual name was cool. I wasn't so mine wasn't."

"My children will always be cool to me," said Ariel firmly. "But we can't control what other people say."

Ethan hesitated. "Of course, giving them common names won't guarantee they will be popular. If someone's personality doesn't fit, then it doesn't matter what their names are."

"But it's still a risk," said Ariel.

"A risk you're perfectly entitled not to take," said Ethan.

Ariel shook her head. "But what about Cal? He loves the names. He thought of them. He thought he was so clever and so did I. I still do. I can't tell him I've changed my mind."

"Of course you can," said Ethan. "Though you don't have to word it quite like that. You could express your concerns and see what he says. Caleb never reacts well if you tell him he's being stupid – though I admit that doesn't usually stop me from saying it – but he loves you. If you tell him you're worried, then he'll listen. He might not agree with your viewpoint, but I'm sure he'll respect it. And then, together, you can find the names that really are perfect."


	53. Chapter 53

**Elliebelle4444** , luckily, they do have a bit of time to decide on a name - as long as one of them feels able to admit to the other that the names aren't exactly perfect! I don't know yet what they'll be called, but something sensible, I hope! Thank you for your review.

 **X-Sammii-X** , I bet Ethan would love to be the father. He loves Ariel. But he also knows Cal is devoted to Ariel and the babies, so he wouldn't want to take that away from them. It would be a horrible shame for Cal to miss the birth. Thank you for your review.

 **westlife4ever80** , Cal will be freaking out completely! In some ways, it might be better if he hadn't known, but once Max had spoken to them, they couldn't really withhold the information. So watch out for freaked-out Cal! Thank you for your review.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. I could definitely imagine Cal running off like that - though at least he'd be running towards something rather than running away this time. Ethan does love Ariel so he's really struggling, but he's doing the right thing as always.

 **Tanith Panic** , I think Cal will be very happy to change the names, but Ariel hasn't known Cal as long as we have! Fandom should be ageless, but I think a lot of people would disagree. Ethan's going to be a great uncle too! Thank you for your review.

 **Bonnie Sveen Fan** , thank you for your review. The twins haven't arrived yet, but it probably is going to be a race against time! Poor Cal. He's been doing all the right things, but he always seems to mess up at the worst possible time.

 **Is-there-somewhere-x** , thank you for your review. It would be very difficult growing up with those names. If I had twin boys, I'd be tempted to call them Caleb and Ethan, but I'm not sure I could! I'm so glad you're enjoying this.

 _If anyone has any ideas of names for the babies, feel free to make a suggestion! For me, it's not about choosing names I like but about choosing names I can imagine Cal and Ariel choosing (perhaps with a bit of guidance from Ethan)._

* * *

Cal couldn't bear it.

The one time Ariel really needed him; the one time he really needed to be there; the most important day of his life so far, and where was he?

At the police station, waiting to be questioned in connection with a break-in.

He couldn't possibly have known that today would be the day, but that wasn't the point. He was so close to being a father and he had responsibilities. To his girlfriend as well as his unborn children. He'd let them down and now she was giving birth without him.

She wasn't alone and he was grateful for that, but it was yet another example of Cal not being good enough and Ethan stepping in to do what his big brother couldn't. Worse than that: Ethan _loved_ Ariel. Cal couldn't even begin to imagine how much this must be breaking his heart.

There were tears in Cal's eyes now. Tears of shame and guilt, but also of sadness. He rested his arms on the table and buried his head in them. All he could do was wait and hope he would be out in time. Labour could last for nearly 24 hours and first babies, in particular, could be slow, but that was of limited comfort. He didn't want Ariel to suffer for that long.

The door opened. Cal jumped to his feet so quickly, his chair fell backwards and clattered on the hard floor. He ran towards the policeman who'd entered. "Can you interview me now? Please can you interview me? My girlfriend's in labour and I've got to get back to her."

The policeman nodded. "Yes, Dr Knight. We will take your statement now. If you can just give us a few minutes, we'll get everything ready and we'll arrange a car to get you to the hospital afterwards."

Cal looked at him, his desperation now replaced by deep gratitude. "Really? You'd really do that for me?"

The policeman smiled. "Of course. You've made a few mistakes and behaved unwisely, but this is one of the most important days of your life."

* * *

Ethan massaged Ariel's back and spoke as soothingly as he could through the lump in his throat. "It's okay. You're doing really well."

"But they're going to be born soon!" sobbed Ariel. "I'm eight centimetres dilated and Cal isn't here!"

Ethan wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly. "He's still got time, Ariel. On average, you wouldn't expect Baby 1 to make an appearance for couple of hours – it could be longer as it's your first pregnancy. Cal still has time."

"I don't mean to be ungrateful," wept Ariel. "I'm so glad you're here and you're wonderful. Really wonderful. But…"

"But I'm not Cal," said Ethan understandingly. He closed his eyes against a rush of tears.

"I'm sorry, Ethan. I-"

"Shh. Don't apologise. It's fine."

"Ethan, I… oh my God, it hurts, it hurts…"

"I know, sweetheart, but I'll do what I can." Ethan blinked his tears away and moved round so he was facing her. He took Ariel's hands. "Are you ready to breathe in with me? That's good. That's very good." He reached for the Entonox. "Here: try some of this. That's right." He waited, continuing to breathe with her. "Does that help?"

"A bit," said Ariel.

"That's good. And don't forget there are other painkilling methods," said Ethan.

Ariel nodded. Ethan wasn't convinced she was listening, but then she turned to him, a light in her eyes that worried him. "Ethan, I want an epidural."

Ethan looked at her in slight confusion. Ariel had been clear from the first that she didn't want an epidural and every time Ethan had tentatively suggested it, she'd either ignored it or said no. "Why do you want an epidural?" he asked.

"For the pain," said Ariel steadily. She became slightly defensive. "It does hurt, you know, Ethan!"

"Yes, I know," said Ethan awkwardly. "But you didn't want an epidural before. You were concerned about the risks to your babies – small as the risks are. What's changed your mind?"

"The pain!" shouted Ariel.

It was natural for her to shout. Ethan was causing difficulties and she probably was in pain. But he was worried. She'd changed her mind so quickly.

"I want an epidural: what's wrong with that?" said Ariel. "I know there are risks, but 30% of women have an epidural and the anaesthetist will discuss it with me anyway."

"It is quite late on," said Ethan uncomfortably. "They are typically given when you're four or five centimetres dilated."

"Typically," said Ariel. "But you said it's not too late unless the baby's crowning."

Ethan shook his head slowly. Ariel was allowed to change her mind. A lot of women did. But there was something wrong here and he had a horrible feeling he knew what it was.

"Is that really why you want an epidural, Ariel?" he asked gently. "For the pain?"

"Why else would I want an epidural?" said Ariel.

Ethan could tell she was becoming agitated. Automatically, he glanced at the monitor.

"Oh my God, Ethan, it hurts!" said Ariel.

Ethan didn't doubt it. Even with the pain relief she was already receiving, labour hurt.

But the nagging feeling remained.

"Ariel, are you really asking for an epidural for the pain?" said Ethan. "Or are you hoping to slow down labour to give Cal a greater chance of getting here?"

* * *

It was taking too long. Cal must have been over what had happened a million times; answered all the same questions. But still they kept coming. The same questions in different guises: probably not really designed to trip him up if he was innocent, but he was panicking now and he was terrified he might say the wrong thing and incriminate himself.

"Could you talk us through what you were thinking when you arrived at the house?"

"I've already told you!" said Cal. "Please – I'm not trying to be difficult. I just want to be with my girlfriend and my babies."

"I appreciate that, Dr Knight. I wish we could do this another way, but we can't. I'm sure you've told us everything you're aware of noticing, but people often notice things without realising. It's only once you go back to that moment that you start to remember small things that seem like nothing, but can be very valuable to us."

Cal tried to control his breathing. "But I'm not likely to be able to think of something like that now. I'm sorry the house got burgled. It's a horrible thing to happen. They must feel terrified and violated and not safe in their own home and they have my genuine sympathy, but it's _my_ family that concerns me now."

The policeman nodded patiently. "Of course, Dr Knight, and if something comes back to you later, we would like to hear it. But a momentous occasion like a birth can affect your memory. There might be small details you can remember now but which might go out of your mind completely – perhaps forever – once your children are born."

"Okay." Cal knew it was no good arguing. "I think I probably felt relief at first. I was so desperate to find a phone and there was just nothing along that road till I got to the house. Then I noticed the car was there – I took that to mean someone was at home, but of course that was stupid. Most households have more than one car, but they'll usually only take one when they're all going out together. Ethan and I have our own cars, but we're insured to drive each other's. If I give Ethan a lift to work for some reason, the plan will be for me to drive home, but if I'm more tired than him or if I'm upset or if I'm over the limit and he isn't then-"

Cal ground his teeth in frustration.

"Why am I even talking about that? What's wrong with me? I thought the car meant someone was at home. I went to the door. I didn't notice any other signs of anyone being at home. I think if I'd heard a noise from anywhere outside the house, I'd have been on it straight away. I was desperate to hear a sound. Even if it wasn't someone from the house, I'd have talked to them; begged them to let me use their phone and give me a lift back to Holby."

The policeman nodded encouragingly. "Go on, Dr Knight."

"I knocked on the door. I waited. I listened. I knocked again. I looked through the letter box. I remember noticing how tidy the hall was. I suppose that was weird. I'm not sure why I expected it not to be. Maybe it's because I'm so messy and my hall would be a mess if I didn't live with Ethan. But then I started thinking there might be something wrong."

"Was there anything particular that led you to this conclusion?"

Cal thought and shook his head. "I honestly think it was just desperation. There were no signs of life in the house, but I desperately wanted there to be someone there So I went to the side door, as I said. It was locked. Then I went around to the back and I saw the hole in the window."

"Up until that point, Dr Knight, would you say you made any noise?"

"Well, I rang the doorbell," said Cal. "But I wasn't trying to be quiet. I think I might have run up the drive. Then I think I said a few rude words when I cut my hand on the window. But if anyone was there, they'd have heard the doorbell. It's possible they went out the front door when I'd gone round to the back. If they were out the back, they might have been able to get round the house the other way. Or they could have jumped over the hedge at the back and hidden there."

The thought of coming face to face with the burglar had barely troubled him before, but now it made him shiver. He could have been hurt or even killed, leaving two precious babies without a daddy. Leaving Ariel without a boyfriend.

"Please can I go now? I really don't think there's anything more I can do for you, but there's so much I can do for my family."


	54. Chapter 54

**Bonnie Sveen Fan** , I thought the epidural problem would be an interesting dilemma for Ethan - he knows so much more than the average stand-in birth partner. Thank you for your review.

 **X-Sammii-X** , thank you for your review and the name suggestions - Cal and Ariel might well stick with Liam and I think they might both like Madison. Ethan would be an amazing daddy! I hope he will get the chance. Thank you for your review.

 **CBloom2** , that's a really good point about Cal realising what Ethan's going through - Ethan will probably play it down, but perhaps Cal needs to realise how great his brother is. Ethan is going to be a brilliant uncle. Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , thank you for your review and the name suggestions. A lot of people like Liam! I do like the name Darcy - I've always loved Darcey Bussell. I think Ariel might possibly have fooled Cal, but it's very difficult to fool Ethan in medical matters.

 **westlife4ever80** , thank you for your review. Cal has to have his interview, but it won't last forever and I think everyone understands his reasons for being desperate to get out of there.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. I'm glad Cal's feelings are coming across. It's difficult for Ethan - Ariel has every right to have an epidural, but Ethan can't help thinking like a doctor.

* * *

Ariel wouldn't meet Ethan's eye. She stared straight in front of her. Then she cried out as the pain hit her. Ethan put his arm around her and comforted her through the contraction, but then he knew he had to ask her again.

He felt guilty for trying to have such a serious conversation with her at such a critical stage, but he wanted to make sure she was doing this for the right reasons. Perhaps that was wrong of him – perhaps he needed to stop thinking as a doctor and accept that, for whatever reason, Ariel wanted an epidural. If he didn't happen to be a doctor, he wouldn't have questioned her decision. So perhaps he shouldn't question it now.

But he _was_ a doctor.

"Ariel?" said Ethan softly. "You can tell me the truth. I won't be angry. I know you want Cal to be here and you're quite right. He ought to be here. He would have been here if he'd known it would be tonight."

"He was looking forward to it," said Ariel, and began to cry.

"I know," said Ethan, hugging her. "I'm sorry he's not here."

"He really wanted to be here."

Ethan rubbed her back. "Of course he did and he still might get here in time."

"But epidurals do slow down labour, don't they?"

"They can do, but that's not a reason for having one," said Ethan. "It might be too late in any case."

"But you said-"

"I know and you're right. As long as the baby's head isn't crowning, it's never really too late, but the delivery team might discourage it. They'd need to find the anaesthetist; then he or she would need to talk you through it; then it can take fifteen minutes to place the catheter and although pain relief should start quickly, the whole process could take forty minutes. So if they think you could be only an hour away from delivery, they might advise against it."

"But I am in pain!" said Ariel.

Ethan knew she was. Arguing with him was getting her through to an extent, but he didn't think it would last. "I know, Ariel. And if you're in enough pain to need an epidural, then of course you can have one as far as I'm concerned. But you can't use medical equipment for any other reason than that it was intended for. I'm so sorry." Ethan's voice was trembling. "It's a painkiller. Some painkillers in tablet form can give short-term relief from feelings of depression, but they are painkillers and I can't advocate taking them for anything other than pain. I wish I could tell you it was fine. I wish I could go along with what you want and pretend it's for the pain, but I'm a doctor and I can't." Tears filled his eyes. "Not even for you."

Ariel reached for his hand and held it tightly. "I understand, Ethan. It's okay. You can't help the way you feel. But… are you saying that if I ask for an epidural, you'll tell them why?"

Ethan hesitated. He fought to stop his tears from falling. "I don't know. I honestly don't know." He knew that if he did, the team would be less likely to accept Ariel's request. It was also a grey area because it was so difficult to say how much pain was too much pain. Everyone was different. Ariel might be in more pain than some people who requested – and got - epidurals.

"Okay. I won't do it," said Ariel.

Ethan blinked at her, but his eyes were too blurred. He took his glasses off and dashed his hands across them. "Sorry. Um, so you're saying you don't want an epidural?"

"Not if you feel this strongly about it," said Ariel. "And if you feel this strongly about it… well, Cal's a doctor too so he'll probably feel exactly the same way."

"Perhaps." Ethan personally had his doubts about what Cal would want, but if Ariel was Cal's patient rather than his girlfriend, Ethan rather thought he'd be against the epidural too.

"I'm sorry I even thought of it!" said Ariel passionately. "I'm sorry I upset you, Ethan. I never wanted that."

Ethan felt more tears filling his eyes. He knew he'd made the right decision ethically, but he knew it wouldn't be easy seeing Ariel in so much pain and to know he could have saved her from that. "Please don't apologise. You love Cal. You want him to be here. That's natural and I-I'm so happy my brother has found you."

* * *

Cal had thought the moment would never come.

But it was over. The interview was concluded and he was free to leave.

"Thank you for your assistance, Dr Knight. And I genuinely wish you and your family all the best. We'll do all we can to ensure you get there in time."

"You mean you'll have the blue lights flashing?" said Cal hopefully. He'd always wanted to drive in a police car with the lights flashing.

The policeman smiled. "I don't think we can quite stretch to that, but it will be quicker than public transport and much cheaper than a taxi."

Cal was grateful all the same. They could easily have turfed him out of the police station and left him to find his own way to the hospital. They went out into the foyer and he saw the policewoman standing by the desk. She smiled at him and Cal went over to her.

"They're finally letting you go then?" she said.

"Yes, they are," said Cal. "I just wanted to say thanks for keeping me sane. I don't know what I would have done if you weren't there. Got myself in a whole lot more trouble, probably. But anyway, I appreciate it and I'm sorry for being a nuisance."

The policewoman patted his arm. "You weren't a nuisance, Caleb. Believe me, I've met much worse! I hope Ariel and the babies are okay."

"Thanks." Cal considered kissing her. The old Cal would have grabbed any excuse, but the new Cal found he didn't want to. The only girls he wanted to kiss were his girlfriend and his daughter.

The man on the desk called to Cal as he passed. "I've got your friend Max's number if you wanted to phone for an update. Pay phone's over there."

"Thank you!" said Cal, genuinely touched by all the trouble they were going to. He was sure he didn't deserve it – he might not have committed a crime, but he had, as was so often the case, made a difficult situation worse. He took the number gratefully and phoned Max. "Hey, mate. I'm just about to leave. Please tell me they're not born yet?"

"I haven't got a recent update, but I can get one," said Max. "Robyn, can you call Ethan for me?"

Cal faintly heard Robyn's voice in the background and a few agonising moments later, Max spoke again. "Robyn says Ariel's nine centimetres, whatever that means – I don't think I'm going to think about it, to be honest with you!" Max paused, listening to Robyn. "She's doing really well and there have been no complications or any need for the doctor to step in. Her vital signs are good."

"Thank God!" said Cal fervently.

"You're welcome," said Max cheekily.

"I wasn't talking to you!" said Cal, laughing. He didn't think he'd laughed for a long time. "But thanks, Max. I really appreciate it. But now I really have to go because I'm on a payphone and I really need to leave!"

"We're all keeping our fingers crossed," said Max.

Cal thanked him again and hung up. He looked at the policeman, feeling suddenly terrified, but he did his best to control it. "So. This is it."

* * *

Ethan was feeling so guilty. Ariel was screaming and crying and Nina was strongly suggesting she had an epidural, but Ariel kept saying no. She had been opposed to the idea before, but so many mothers felt as Ariel did to begin with, only to change their mind when the pain hit.

He couldn't bear to see her in pain. He had tears in his eyes as he massaged her back and told her how well she was doing.

"I want Cal!" cried Ariel. "I just want Cal!"

Ethan couldn't keep back a sob, though he doubted anyone had heard it. He turned away for a moment, fighting with his tears. One slipped down his face, then another, but he knew he couldn't let them consume him. His feelings didn't matter. Ariel needed him – and the fact he wasn't Cal meant she needed him even more.

He brushed his tears away and turned back to Ariel. "You can do this. I know you can. It's going to be okay. You're doing so well and Cal's on his way. It won't be long now." He wiped tears and perspiration from her face and then used the water spray. "You can do this and Cal's going to be so proud of you. Of all of you."

"I can't do this!" wailed Ariel. "It hurts so much."

"You can have an epidural," said Ethan gently. "It's fine. I won't tell them anything."

"No," sobbed Ariel. "I can't, Ethan. If I do, you'll never know why I'm doing it."

"Of course I'll know!" said Ethan. "Ariel, I can see how much pain you're in and I'm so sorry if what I said before makes you feel like you can't have one."

Ariel shook her head and held out her hand. Ethan took it in his and felt her bone-crushing grip. It hurt quite a lot, but he knew he was in much less pain than Ariel.

"That's good. Squeeze tighter if you like," said Ethan, hoping she wouldn't. "It's okay. That's what I'm here for."

Ariel started screaming again. Ethan began to worry and felt for the buzzer, but Nina was there before he could press it. Again, she advised an epidural but again, Ariel refused it.

Ethan felt terrible. He knew it was his fault, but he didn't know what he could do.

And then he remembered. He was a doctor.

He knew exactly what he could do.


	55. Chapter 55

**Tanith Panic** , thank you for your review. Ethan won't be able to give Ariel anything himself as he's not working, but he might have an idea... I thought Cal deciding not to kiss an attractive woman was the best way of showing he's in love! I'm glad you're enjoying it.

 **CBloom2** , I think you're right about Cal being angry with Ethan. If he asks about pain relief, things could get very awkward! Cal would probably have agreed to the epidural, but Ethan likes to go by the book. Thank you for your review - not long to wait now!

 **Helena** , the babies will be born in the next chapter, then they will feature prominently in the chapters after that. I think there will probably be 59 chapters, but I'm always wrong about things like that! Thank you for your review.

 **Bonnie Sveen Fan** , thank you for your review. I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter. Cal has been released at last, but I'm afraid I can't promise an easy journey for him...

 **X-Sammii-X** , thank you for your review. The twins will be born in the next chapter, so not long to wait. I think I started this in September, so it probably has been nine months! I think only one person cries in this chapter and it's not Ethan.

 **westlife4ever80** , I think Connie and Elle (who have experienced labour), Zoe (who is prepared to turn a blind eye), and Cal (who's always breaking rules) would have encouraged Ariel to have an epidural - but Ethan always wants to do the right thing. Dylan might refuse if he guessed the truth, but he might be too uninterested to question Ariel! Thank you for your review.

* * *

So far, Ethan had let his medical knowledge be a hindrance, but it didn't have to be that way. It shouldn't be that way.

He could use his knowledge to help Ariel.

"Nina, I don't suppose a spinal block is an option?"

Nina looked doubtful. "I don't think Ariel's going to need a caesarean or an assisted birth."

"No, but I know they are sometimes given for vaginal births," said Ethan. "Ariel is so close to giving birth now, there might not be time for an epidural to be put in place and for it to take effect, so it would make sense to use a faster-acting form of painkiller."

"It's a possibility, Ethan, though we'd need to speak to the anaesthetist first. But what do you think, Ariel?"

Ariel didn't answer for a moment. She didn't look at Ethan and he found he was holding his breath, hoping she would agree. He hated the fact she was in so much pain because of him.

"It's not like an epidural," he said. "There are certain differences. But it will help with the pain." Ethan wished he could remember if a spinal block slowed labour too. He knew there was a good chance it did, though the slowing of labour was more associated with an epidural - not that you could ever be completely sure it had as you could only guess how long labour would have been without the anaesthetic. But either way, it was an option and perhaps the anaesthetist could persuade Ariel where Ethan had failed. "You can speak to the anaesthetist about it and I'm sure they'll be able to explain it a lot better than I could."

"Then I'd like to speak to the anaesthetist, please," said Ariel.

* * *

"Come on! Come on!" said Cal.

The car that had been provided for him wasn't a police car – and he was really wishing it was.

Not because he wanted to ride in a police car with the siren and the blue flashing light. Cal still got quite excited about riding in ambulances with the lights and siren going so a police car really should have been a treat – but he didn't care about that now.

He wanted to be at the hospital. He wanted to be holding Ariel and letting her know everything would be okay.

Instead, he was sitting in a traffic jam.

"Why do traffic jams always have to happen at the worst possible moment?" he asked.

His driver shrugged.

"Why do traffic jams happen at all?" said Cal, his voice rising.

The car didn't move.

"Why has no-one perfected teleportation yet? Don't they realise how much easier it would make our lives? It would completely solve the fuel emissions problems too."

"Maybe they'll sort it for next time," said the driver.

"Next time?" said Cal. "You mean next time Ariel has a baby?" He shook his head. "No way! I am never going through this again!"

Some of the cars ahead of them began to move.

"Unless Ariel wants more kids, of course," said Cal.

* * *

"I'm scared," said Ariel.

Ethan squeezed her hand. "Of course you are. Anyone would be. But you'll be fine. I'm right here."

"Okay, Ariel, can you put your head down for me, please?" said the anaesthetist.

Ethan helped to guide Ariel's head into the correct position. "There you are. It probably feels very odd, but it shouldn't take too long."

"I'm getting ready to put the local anaesthetic in now, Ariel. You might feel a stinging sensation. If you feel anything else, let me know, okay?"

"Okay," whispered Ariel, as she held more tightly to Ethan's hand.

"If you can just keep as still as you can for me…"

Ethan squeezed Ariel's hand. "Breathe with me, Ariel." He did some slow, deep breaths, but he could feel her tensing. "Okay. Um, they do recommend eye contact, but this position isn't really ideal. Bear with me for a minute." Ethan knelt beside Ariel, facing away from her, and leaned backwards so his head was almost on her lap. "Can you see my eyes now?"

Ariel giggled. "Yes, Ethan."

"Keep looking at me," said Ethan, between breaths. "I'm right here and you can do this. You can keep still for me; for the babies; for Cal. It's okay. You're doing really well."

* * *

Cal stared ahead of him in disbelief. "You've got to be joking!"

Two vehicles had collided in front of them. Cal'sdriver had managed to brake in time, but one of the cars coming from another direction wasn't so quick and had smashed into the other two cars.

"I can go another way," offered the driver.

Cal sighed. "Of course we can't." He undid his seatbelt and opened the car door. "These people might need medical attention. I can't just drive off."

* * *

"My legs feel so heavy," said Ariel. "They feel bigger than my bump!"

Ethan smiled. "They really must feel massive then!"

"Ethan, you're so rude!" said Ariel. "I'm telling your brother you said that."

"Oh… I'm so sorry… I didn't mean…."

Ariel squeezed his hand. "It's okay, Ethan. I'm just joking." Her grip tightened. "Ethan, I don't think it's working! It hurts! "

"It's all right," said Ethan. "It can take up to ten minutes. Just keep looking at me and I'll help you through this."

* * *

Cal made his report to the ambulance service and walked over to one of the cars, which had just one passenger. "Hey, Lowri. How are you doing?"

"It hurts…" moaned Lowri.

"I know," said Cal gently, trying not to think of another girl of about the same age who was hurting just as much, only for a much happier reason. "I'm sorry I haven't got any equipment with me. I left it all in the car – not the car I'm in now. It's a very long story."

"Can you tell me?" whispered Lowri.

"Of course, but I will have to keep checking on the others," said Cal. "And I'll keep asking you questions too." He reached through the window for Lowri's hand. "It all started when my boss found out the real reason I'd taken a couple of days off work… have you ever taken the day off work when you shouldn't have done?"

"Maybe," said Lowri.

Cal laughed. "Go on: tell me what you did."

Lowri was clearly having trouble speaking, but she did her best. "Went to Glastonbury. Told work I was sick."

"I imagine you were within a couple of hours of being at Glastonbury," said Cal.

Lowri gave a shaky laugh. "What did you do?"

"I took my girlfriend to a One Direction concert," said Cal. "I told my boss it was a family emergency, but my little brother Ethan blabbed. Have you got brothers and sisters?"

"Got a little sister… she'd have blabbed too."

"Younger siblings, eh?" said Cal, but the main thought in his mind wasn't Ethan.

One of the twins would have a younger sibling too.

* * *

Ariel was still clutching Ethan's hand. "I can't believe it's nearly time!"

"I know," said Ethan. "It's going to be incredible."

"And I can't feel any pain at all!" said Ariel. Then her smile faded. "But I wish Cal was here."

"I know," said Ethan. "So do I. But I'm sure he's doing everything he can to get here." He smiled. "It actually might be quite a good thing he hasn't got a phone. Otherwise, he'd be on the phone to you the whole time. I'm sure he's in a complete state."

"You don't think maybe he… regrets anything?" said Ariel.

"I imagine he regrets storming off like a complete idiot," said Ethan. "I'm sure he regrets not being here for you the whole time." He put his arm around her. "But apart from that, Ariel, I know Cal has no regrets at all."

* * *

"I don't suppose you could do me a favour?" said Cal.

The paramedic had a smile on her face. "Go on. What is it?"

"I don't suppose I could ride in the ambulance with you?"

She shook her head. "I'm afraid not. You're not a relative and you do have your own car."

"It's not my car," said Cal. "But although I'm not a relative of anyone involved in the crash, I am a relative of the two beautiful babies my girlfriend is about to give birth to. The only reason I'm not with her now is because I'm a stupid idiot. Maybe you could say I don't deserve to be there for the birth, but my girlfriend doesn't deserve to be going through it without me."

* * *

Ariel shook her head. "No. I can't push. I'm not feeling the urge."

"That's because of the spinal block," said Ethan. "But Nina says it's time to push and I have to say I agree with her."

Ariel's eyes filled with tears. "I don't want to. I don't want to do it without Cal."

"I know you don't." Ethan wrapped his arms around her. "I know it's the very last thing you want, but your babies have to come first now. They want to come out and meet you and they need you to help them. Cal is an adult. He can take care of himself. Um… well, mostly he can. But your babies are so tiny and so helpless. They need you, Ariel. They need you more than anyone has ever needed you and they need you right now. Come on, sweetheart. Push for me? Push for your babies?"

* * *

Cal helped to push the trolley out of the ambulance. "Thank you for the lift. Seriously. I appreciate it so much. But I've got to go. Hang in there, Lowri, okay? I know all the doctors in the ED so I can promise you'll be in good hands."

"I hope everything goes well with the birth," said the paramedic.

"Good… luck," whispered Lowri.

"Thanks!" said Cal, as he ran towards the hospital. He burst through the ED doors and raced along the corridor. He saw Connie up ahead of him and wondered if he should slow down, but he decided he couldn't. This was too important.

Connie looked up and met his eyes. He felt a jolt of fear, but she said nothing. She lifted her hand into the air.

She had her fingers crossed.

"Thank you!" Cal shouted as he ran for the lift. To his amazement, one was standing there empty. He jumped inside and pushed the button for the correct floor. _I'm coming, Ariel. I'm coming, babies. Daddy's on his way._


	56. Chapter 56

_I'm sure I updated this last night and I remember replying to the comments, so I'm not sure what happened!_

 _There will be one more chapter after this. I hope you're not disappointed with what happens._

 **Tanith Panic** , I think Connie is a lot more empathic than she likes to let on! She can be very caring, but she seems to feel she needs to keep a certain distance. I think Ethan forgot he wasn't at work too, so I really can't blame you for forgetting! Thank you for your review.

 **CBloom2** , thank you for your review. Ethan might feel left out, but he still has a very important role to play. I'm sure Cal will want him to be part of the family, but Ethan might find that too painful. Cal has his faults, but he does always seem to do his best for anyone who's injured or ill. He's a great doctor.

 **X-Sammii-X** , Cal probably did save at least one life. Ethan always accuses him of being selfish, but he never is when it comes to helping people who need a doctor. The twins are in this chapter - I hope they're as cute as you're expecting! Thank you for your review.

 **Bonnie Sveen Fan** , Lowri is the Welsh form of Laura - I read that Holby is very close to the Welsh border so I like to use Welsh names for patients sometimes. I like it when the patients care about the doctors - often they're too unwell/injured, of course, but doctors have problems too. Thank you for your review.

 **westlife4ever80** , spinals do sound pretty odd, but it's probably a better feeling than pain! I hope you didn't get any of the horrible side effects. Poor Cal has had so many delays now, but at least the car accident definitely isn't his fault. Thank you for your review.

 _Thank you to **Bronzegirl** for the follow._

* * *

Cal took a deep and nervous breath and went into the cubicle.

Ariel was lying on her back. She looked red and sweaty, but so beautiful. Ethan was sitting with his hand on her shoulder. He looked slightly teary.

In Ariel's arms were two perfect babies.

"Too late," whispered Cal as he stared at them. It couldn't be true. They couldn't be his. He didn't deserve two such perfect babies.

Ariel looked at him, her eyes shining. "Cal! You're here!"

"I'm so sorry," said Cal.

"Don't worry about that. You're here now. They're here. My whole family's here." Ariel looked shyly up at him. "Would you like to hold them?"

"They're so small!" said Cal. "I don't want to break them."

Ethan laughed, but gently. "You won't. It's okay." He leaned over the twins. "Look, it's your daddy!"

"I'm the daddy," breathed Cal. "I'm actually the daddy. No. I can't be the daddy. It's impossible. Oh God, Ethan, they're so…"

"I know," said Ethan. "And they're yours." He looked amused. "Go on, Cal. Don't be scared."

Cal sat on the edge of the bed and took the babies from Ariel.

Two pairs of eyes fastened on him.

Two little people. Two little lives and he'd helped create them.

But he hadn't been here. When they'd made their first entry into the world, Daddy wasn't there waiting.

The way he'd mess this up too.

 _I can't do this…_

Cal realised he was shaking. He held the babies more tightly, but the trembling increased.

"Cal, are you okay?" said Ariel anxiously.

Cal looked down at the babiesd. _I can't do this…_ "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Ariel began to look frightened. "Cal, you don't have to apologise. Everything's fine. I know you're disappointed to miss the birth, but it wasn't your fault. And honestly, I made the most horrible noises and I'm sure I looked very unladylike. I'm not sure I wanted you to see me like that!"

"I… I… I can't," said Cal. He held the babies towards Ethan. "Take them, Ethan. Please take them!"

"Cal-"

Cal squeezed his eyes shut. "Just take them," he moaned.

He felt the soft bundles being lifted from his arms and felt a sense of loss, but he knew it had to be this way.

"I don't deserve these babies," he said.

"Cal, don't you dare-" began Ethan.

"I don't want to do this!" said Cal. "I love you all so much and I want more than anything to be the perfect dad and the perfect boyfriend and one day the perfect husband, but I can't do it and you deserve better. You deserve _Ethan_. He looked after you even though his heart was broken. That's the kind of guy you need. And he loves you."

"But I love _you_ ," said Ariel.

"I know and I love you too," said Cal, barely able to speak. "But if I stay, you know what will happen. I'll mess up. I'll run away. I'll let you down at every turn. It's much better for me to go now before the babies have a chance to love me. It's the only way. I'm so sorry."

With a sob, he hurried out of the cubicle.

* * *

Ethan stared after Cal, unable to believe it – yet at the same time, he wasn't surprised.

He knew Cal. He knew what he was like and he always ran from responsibility. It had been stupid of Ethan to believe even for a moment that Cal would step up this time.

He came out of his angry trance when Ariel started to cry.

Even though Ethan probably would make a more responsible father, Ariel only wanted Cal.

"I'll go after him," said Ethan fiercely. "I'll get him back. I'll shake some sense into his stupid head!"

"But if he doesn't want to be with me…" wept Ariel.

"Of course he wants to be with you!" Ethan put the babies gently into her arms and hugged her as best he could. "He's scared he's going to mess it up, so he messed it up before he can make a worse mess of it. And I'm going to kill him! Well, no. I'm not going to kill him. You need him. But I'll get him back if it's the last thing I do." He kissed the babies' foreheads. He hesitated, then did the same to Ariel. "It's going to be okay. If he won't come back, I'll do everything in the world to support all of you, but he will come back. I know it's what he wants. I've just got to make him see it."

* * *

To Ethan's relief, Cal hadn't gone far. He was sitting on a bench with his head in his hands.

Ethan was out of breath from running, but that wasn't going to stop him from telling Cal what he thought of him. "Caleb Knight, of all the stupid, selfish, cowardly, pathetic, thoughtless, disloyal, heartless, cruel, disgusting, despicable, insensitive, insulting things you've ever done – and if you dare ask if I've swallowed the dictionary again, you're going to find out all the rude words I know too – this takes the absolute biscuit!"

"I can't do it!" said Cal. "I'm stupid and useless and unreliable and I wasn't _here_."

"No, you weren't, and that wasn't entirely your fault," said Ethan. "But every minute you spend away from them for the rest of your life _is_ your choice and your fault and your loss. Do you have any idea how lucky you are, Cal? You have an amazing girl who loves you more than anything and two beautiful babies. I'm not saying I don't agree with you. Ariel and the twins are much too good for you and I probably would make a better father than you. Especially after all my experience of looking after you and cleaning up after you and just generally being a grown-up, one of many qualities that seem to have passed you by. But you're not getting out of your responsibilities this time, Caleb. You are going to go back in there and you are going to apologise and grovel and then you are going to grow up at last and start being a good father and a good partner. Being a good brother wouldn't go amiss either."

Cal was sobbing. "But I'm scared, Ethan. It all seems so real now and I'm so scared I'm going to mess it up!"

Ethan sighed. "Caleb, it's all right to mess up. Everyone makes mistakes. don't mind at all if your first attempt at changing a nappy is a complete disaster. Or even your tenth attempt. You don't have to get it right every time, but you do have to try."

"You don't know how it feels!" moaned Cal.

"I have no doubt it's absolutely terrifying," said Ethan. "Even being an uncle scares me to death. And as for being a birthing partner… but the point is, I didn't give up. I took on the role of Ariel's birthing partner, even though I hadn't been to a single antenatal class. You can't give up on something just because you're scared."

"But I don't know what to do!"

"Of course you don't!" said Ethan. "None of us do. Some of it will come by instinct, but mostly it will be trial and error – mostly error. And that's okay. I made errors when I was Ariel's birthing partner. I massaged her too vigorously and she screamed with pain (she insisted it was a contraction, but I know it wasn't). Then I sprayed her in the eye with her water spray. I also fell off the bed because she was waving her arms and I tried to get out of the way. I made lots of mistakes, but I got there in the end. We all mess up, Cal."

Cal sniffled and wiped his eyes. "I didn't want to leave, Ethan. I love them. They're perfect. All three of them. But I didn't know what to do, so I just ran."

Ethan put his arm around him. "But you didn't run far. You didn't even leave the hospital. That's because your sense of responsibility probably is there somewhere. You've just got to get past all the fears and insecurities first – which seems an absolutely ridiculous thing to be saying to you – and I believe you can do it. It might take a bit of time. You're not going to stop being scared all at once, but fear isn't entirely a bad thing. You can do this, Cal. You've just got to – I can't believe I'm saying this – you've just got to believe in yourself. And you're not alone."

Cal nodded. "I've got Ariel."

"And you've got me," said Ethan. "I'm not going to do everything for you, Cal, but if you need help, I'm always here."

Cal looked into his eyes for a moment. "Thanks, Ethan. You're a much better brother than I deserve."

Ethan smiled. "I know. Now go back in there and prove you're the father those babies deserve and the partner Ariel deserves."

"But what if I can't?" said Cal.

"Then keep trying," said Ethan. "Sometimes you'll need to try harder and sometimes you'll need to try another way, but there's nothing wrong with that. And I'll help." Ethan patted his brother's shoulder. "Next time you feel like you need to run, maybe you could try running _towards_ me rather than away from me. I probably won't be far away." He gave Cal a twisted smile. "I don't suppose you've done anything about sorting out where you and your family are going to live, so I'm guessing it's going to be a crowded flat for a while."

"Um… I didn't really think about that, no," admitted Cal.

Ethan sighed, but he was close to smiling. "Well, if you had, I'd probably be asking you who you were and what you'd done with my brother." He patted Cal's arm and stood up. "Come on."

Cal got to his feet and they walked towards the hospital, only for Cal to stop and swear loudly.

"Cal, you can't use language like that anymore!" said Ethan.

"I just remembered. I arranged for a whole lot of furniture and baby stuff to be delivered to Ariel's flat."

"Oh my goodness! I completely forgot about that," said Ethan. "Okay. I think it's best if I stay with you and Ariel for now, so I'll ask Max and Lofty to take it to our flat. It's going to be quite a squash, but we can probably put some of it into storage for now. I'll organise that while you're grovelling." He caught Cal's arm and turned him to face him. "Don't worry, Cal. It will be all right."


	57. Chapter 57

_This is the last chapter I've written, but I was wondering about writing another when Ariel and the twins come home. What do you think?_

 _I hope the names for the twins are okay. I think they sound good, but we all see and hear names differently._

 **X-Sammii-X** , I'm sorry - I knew a lot of people would be disappointed Cal missed the birth. I was definitely in two minds about it, but I wanted Ethan to have that talk with Cal and for that, so something pretty big had to happen in order for Cal to get so overwhelmed. Despite his outward confidence, I think Cal often feels he's not quite good enough - but I'm hoping he can prove himself wrong by being a great daddy! Thank you for your review.

 **Bonnie Sveen Fan** , Cal really did have a bit of a panic there and we know what he's like when he panics! Luckily, Ethan was there and he knows how to talk some sense into Cal. Thank you for your review.

 **Tanith Panic** , thank you for your review. I knew a lot of people wouldn't like Cal walking out, but I thought it was true to his character - he didn't really want anything to do with little Matilda till Taylor had abandoned her and when little Matilda was rushed to hospital, Cal ran out of the ED, even though he loved Matilda to bits and believed she was his. I'm a bit concerned Max and Lofty are going to mess things up!

 **CBloom2** , thank you for your review. I'm glad you liked Ethan talking sense into Cal - I love it when they have scenes like that (though I love nearly all their scenes together really!) so I really wanted to write a scene like that for this story.

 **westlife4ever** , I'm sorry you have back problems - they can make life so difficult, but a lot of things seem worth it when the result is your own beautiful baby. I'm glad you think Cal's reaction is natural. Thank you for your review.

* * *

Cal returned to the maternity ward with Ethan by his side. He still felt terrified and more than once he looked over at Ethan, seeking reassurance. Each time, Ethan smiled and told him everything would be okay.

Cal couldn't share his confidence. He had no way of knowing how Ariel would react. "What if she's not there, Ethan? What if she's grabbed the babies and run?"

"Well, apart from the fact she wouldn't do that, Ariel has had a spinal block so she has to stay in bed for the next eight hours," said Ethan. "She's not going anywhere." His voice became slightly stern. "And neither are you."

"No. No, I'm not," said Cal, even as he trembled. "I'm not running away. Not from the best thing that ever happened to me."

Ethan raised his eyebrows. "Wasn't the best thing that ever happened to you the birth of your little brother?"

Cal laughed. "I think Ariel and the twins will always come first now. But you're right up there."

They reached the ward. Ethan stood back to let Cal go first, whispering that he was right behind him. Cal stopped outside the cubicle and breathed deeply.

"Will you just go in?" said Ethan, but his voice held more amusement than annoyance. "She's not going to kill you."

Cal stepped slowly into the cubicle and looked at the three beautiful people on the bed. Ariel's eyes were red, but she was smiling as she spoke lovingly to the two babies snuggled into her chest.

They looked so tiny and so perfect and so happy. They were very close together, perhaps even close enough for their eyes to focus on each other. Little was visible outside the blankets but their screwed-up little faces and the soft, downy fair hair on the top of their heads. The speech Cal had been planning on the way vanished from his mind as he sat on the bed and stroked one baby's soft cheek, then the other.

"They're so beautiful," said Cal, his eyes filling. "I can't believe… oh my God, Ethan, I'm so glad you brought me back. Aren't you the sweetest, most beautiful babies in the world? Aren't you even more adorable than your daddy? I just want to eat you up!"

There was slight amusement in Ethan's voice as he said: "Don't you have something to say to Ariel?"

Cal's gaze remained on the babies. "Isn't your Uncle Nibbles a big fusspot? You're going to have some fun laughing at him when you get older. He is right though. I've got something very important to say to your mummy, but don't forget to listen because I'm saying it to you too." He kissed both babies on the cheek. "I love you so much!"

"Caleb! Talk to Ariel."

Cal watched as a tiny fist fought free of the blanket. He took it in his own and then felt inside the other blanket carefully for one of the other twin's hands. "You don't mind if Daddy holds your hands while you talk to Mummy, do you? Daddy is very, very scared that Mummy's going to be cross and she probably will be cross because Daddy's been a very bad man… oh, Ariel, they're holding on to me! They know I'm their daddy!"

"They don't want you to run away again, do they?" said Ethan, but he didn't say it as pointedly as he might have done.

Cal lifted his eyes to Ariel's face. "Ariel darling, I'm so sorry. For everything I've done wrong today, which I'm not going to list now because it would take forever, but most of all I'm sorry for running away. It's not an excuse, but I suppose I just panicked. I'm so sorry and I promise you, I'm never going to leave any of you ever again. I love you all so much and maybe I don't deserve you, but I don't care. I love you. I'll protect you from everything. I'll always be here. Is there any chance you'll forgive me? Or at least let me hang around so I can try to be a better, stronger, nicer person?"

Ariel smiled and her eyes shone as she looked at him. "Of course I forgive you, Cal. And I can't blame you for wanting to run away at first. It is pretty terrifying. I'm sure I said the words 'I've changed my mind' at least twice."

Cal leaned over the bed and kissed her. At the touch of her lips, a dart of electricity flowed through him and he deepened the kiss, but then one of the babies began to cry and he quickly pulled away, looking down anxiously at the unhappy twin. "Is it okay? Does it need feeding or nappies?"

Ariel was smiling as she shook her head. "He's fine, but he's not an 'it', Cal. He's your son. And this is your daughter."

Cal planted a kiss on his daughter's forehead before turning back to his son. "What's wrong, little boy? Are you going to tell Daddy what's wrong? Have you got something nasty and sticky in your nappy? Daddy can take care of that for you. Well, actually, Daddy doesn't have a clue how to take care of it, but Daddy will learn."

"Why don't you give him a cuddle?" suggested Ariel.

Cal awkwardly took the small bundle from her. He looked at Ariel and saw she was talking softly to their daughter, her face close to hers. Cal started to move the baby up and down in his arms, careful to support his head, but the little baby didn't stop crying. "I don't think I'm doing this right. Don't cry, little boy. Daddy's here and Daddy loves you so much." He tried moving him in a different way. "Hey, I'm getting it! Look, Ariel! Look, Nibbles! I'm bouncing my baby!"

Ethan was smiling. "Well done, Cal. It looks great. And look: he's not crying anymore. I think he just wanted attention."

"Well, I can understand _that_ ," said Cal. "Attention's brilliant, isn't it, little boy?" He looked over at Ariel, frowning slightly. "Darling, do they have names yet?"

"Aw, look at your little eyes!" said Ariel. "What a beautiful, beautiful blue!"

"Thank you: I've always liked my eyes, but maybe you could answer my question?" said Cal.

Ariel turned to look at him incredulously. Then she laughed. "No, they don't have names yet. That's something we need to decide together."

"Have you, um, had any ideas?" said Cal. "Since meeting them, I mean?"

Ariel hesitated. "I was thinking something. It's fine if you'd rather not, but I was wondering if you'd like to call the girl Matilda?"

"After Mum?" said Cal softly.

Ariel nodded. "I wish I could have met her."

"Me too," said Cal. "She'd have loved you." He kissed her. "I think Matilda is a lovely name. I think Mum would have liked that. You'd like that too, wouldn't you, little Matilda? Named after your grandma?" He thought for a moment, then he smiled. "How about Matilda Jane?"

"Jane was my mother's name," said Ariel.

Cal made sure his son was securely in her arms before leaning over to kiss Ariel. "I know."

This time, the kiss made him feel warm and safe.

Maybe Ethan was right. Maybe he could do this.

Cal nuzzled his son's head. "Now we need a name for you! Something for the girls to write on all those Valentine's cards you're going to get."

"I do still like Liam," said Ariel hesitantly.

"I like Liam too," said Cal.

"But… perhaps not with Niall as a middle name?" said Ariel. "You know how children grow up being embarrassed by what their parents were into…"

"We could call him after your dad," said Cal. "He was Daniel, wasn't he?"

Ariel's smile was tremulous but happy. "Liam Daniel. I love it."

"And I love him!" Cal turned back to Liam. "Aren't you gorgeous, Liam Daniel? Who's the most handsome boy I've ever seen outside a mirror?"

He heard Ethan's sound of disgust, but when he looked round, his brother was very reluctantly smiling.

"I'm only joking, Liam." Cal kissed him. "You're much, much, MUCH more gorgeous than anything I've ever seen in a mirror."

Ariel was rocking Matilda. "Don't cry, darling. It's okay. I know it's all different. The world's got much bigger now. But you're going to be okay. Me and Daddy and Uncle Ethan are here and we're going to look after you."

"It's 'Uncle Nibbles'," corrected Cal. "Isn't it, Liam?"

"No, it's 'Uncle Ethan'," said Ariel. "Isn't it, Matilda?"

Cal smiled. "And I'm Daddy! I'm really actually Daddy!"

Ariel smiled at him. "I love you.

"I love you too," said Cal.

"Okay: I think that's my cue to leave," said Ethan. "Max and Lofty might need some help with the furniture removal."

Ariel looked at him gratefully. "Thanks, Ethan. We really can't leave all that stuff outside my flat."

"I was wondering if we should take it to my flat instead as it's bigger," said Ethan. "There's plenty of room for the five of us for the time being and I really like the idea of having my little niece and nephew around. I can help keep an eye on Cal, too."

"Don't listen to silly Uncle Nibbles, Liam," said Cal. "He doesn't know what he's talking about. Daddy's very responsible."

"You wait till he takes after you!" said Ethan.

"Say goodbye to Uncle Ethan, Matilda," said Ariel, and lifted Matilda's little hand.

"Say goodbye to Uncle Nibbles, Liam," said Cal, and did the same with Liam's hand.

Ethan kissed Liam, Matilda and Ariel.

"Hey, don't I get a kiss?" said Cal.

"I'll let Ariel do that," said Ethan. He gave Cal a very quick hug as he passed and whispered: "Don't worry. You'll be fine."

Cal held Liam in his arms and smiled across at Ariel and Matilda.

As usual, it looked as though Ethan was right.


	58. Chapter 58

_I decided I will do one more chapter of this. I hope you enjoy it. Thank you for all the support with this story. There were times when I felt disillusioned and had no idea where I was going with this, but the lovely reviews really helped - it was amazing to get so many new readers towards the end of this story. I wasn't expecting that._

 **X-Sammii-X** , I couldn't let Cal run away from happiness! It would have hurt Ariel and also Cal. I think sometimes Cal runs away from the things he really wants. It's lucky they have Uncle Nibbles to help. Thank you for your review - I know you like stories with babies in so I'm glad you found this one.

 **Helena** , thank you for your review and your comments on my grammar. You are absolutely correct that the preterite or past simple form of the verbs 'to take' and 'to run' are 'took' and 'ran'. However, I am actually using a form of a different past tense: the perfect tense, also known as the past continuous or past progressive tense. I say 'a form of' as the structure is slightly more complicated than the true perfect tense, as it refers to events that might have happened rather than events that undeniably have, but I will focus on the perfect tense as this is the part that is relevant to your comment (boring explanations follow, so please feel free to skip).

The perfect tense is formed by using the auxiliary verb 'to have' in the present tense (here the third person singular 'she has'), followed by the past participle. In most cases, the past participle is identical to the preterite form - for example, in the verb 'to grab', both the preterite and past participle forms are 'grabbed'. So 'she grabbed' and 'she has grabbed' are both correct. 'To take' and 'to run', however, have different past participle forms. The past participle of 'took' is 'taken'. The past participle of 'ran' is, confusingly, identical to the present tense form, 'run'.So in the perfect tense, the correct forms of the verbs are 'she has taken' and 'she has run'. Although the auxiliary verb does not immediately precede the word 'run' in my sentence, the two participles are linked by the word 'and' and therefore share the auxiliary.

This means my grammar was correct - but it is possible that in the future, this will change. It is becoming increasingly common in both speech and writing to use the past simple form instead of the past participle - the fact that you endeavored to correct me demonstrates this. Language is ever-changing and perhaps past participle forms such as 'taken' and 'ran' will become obsolete in the future. Perhaps in twenty years time, someone will read my explanation (if they have the time and inclination!) and spot what would, in their time, be considered a grammatical error. Only someone with a knowledge of historical grammar will be able to tell them that at the time I wrote this, it was correct. It's quite scary to think that some words and grammatical forms could disappear from the language altogether - but because of the internet, they will never disappear completely. (Yes. Perhaps I am a geek after all. I've always wondered.)

 **Bonnie Sveen Fan** , your wish is my command! Here's a chapter of what happens when Cal, Ariel, Ethan, Liam and Matilda arrive home. I hope you enjoy it. Thank you for all your reviews and support with this story.

 **CBloom2** , I thought it might be nice to write a final chapter where they arrive home, so here it is! I hope you like it. There's a little bit of Cal being a daddy and Uncle Nibbles being (I hope!) his lovely self. Thank you for your review - I'm glad you've enjoyed this story.

 **Tanith Panic** , thank you for your review. I think a lot of people will tend to say 'it' when they're not sure of the sex of the baby as it can be equally embarrassing when they guess and get it wrong! The furniture features in this chapter, though I haven't gone into lots of detail about what happened.

 **ETWentHome** , thank you for your review. I'm so glad you enjoyed the chapter - as you can see, I have decided to write another one. It ties up a few loose ends and (I hope) gives a better ending than the previous chapter would have done. I'm glad you thought they were cute.

 _Thank you to **Katemharland** for the follow and favourite._

* * *

Cal was used to seeing the flat in a mess. After all, he was usually the cause of it.

But this was a bit different.

A large playpen stood in the middle of the room with two rocking horses and two indoors swing beside it. There were also a couple of tricycles (had he really bought tricycles for his then-unborn children?) as well as various large boxes, the contents of which Cal could only guess at. There was the double pram – he remembered buying that – and there should be a double push-chair somewhere too. As they walked into the living room, he saw two high chairs set up beside the table (not that Liam and Matilda would be ready to use them for a while either) and a pair of Moses baskets.

"Did I really buy all this?" said Cal incredulously.

A smile came to Ethan's lips as he helped Ariel over to the sofa. "Actually, not quite all. I did have to make a quick dash to the shops for a changing mat, nappies… various 'inessential' things like that."

"We're not in trouble for leaving all the boxes there, are we?" asked Ariel anxiously.

"No, not at all," said Ethan. "Someone did make a report to the landlord, but between Lofty's kindness, Max's humour and my general incompetence, we sorted everything out. There is a lot of stuff, but we've tried to arrange everything as logically as possible. If you want something that's usually found in the bathroom – like the potties, which should be extremely useful in two to three years' time – you should look in the bathroom. The little bowls and plates are in the kitchen cupboards. The baby thermometer is in the first aid box with our thermometers. The double cot is in your room, along with some nappies and things you're likely to need during the night, though there is only one changing mat, which is behind the sofa."

"Thank you, Ethan," said Ariel. "It really is kind of you."

"It was my pleasure, Ariel."

Cal lowered Liam into her arms. "There you are, little man. Have a nice cuddle with Mummy. That always makes me feel better. Okay, little Matilda. Are you in need of a nice, new nappy? Yes, I think you are!"

"I think Liam is too," said Ariel, smiling at him adoringly. "I think they're so clever for being able to do wees. I'm sure, in time, the novelty will be fade, but I think it's the most adorable thing ever now!"

"Yeah, it is, isn't it?" said Cal, smiling fondly.

Ethan reached behind the sofa for the changing mat, which he laid it out in the middle of the floor. He found a pack of nappies, some tissues and baby wipes and various other bits of paraphernalia, then he stood aside and sent a challenging look Cal's way.

Cal knew what Ethan was thinking. Ethan was waiting for him to mess it up. Just because he'd overheard two of the nurses giggling about Caleb Knight's nappy-changing skills, or lack of.

Cal laid Matilda and Liam on their backs. He took a nappy from the bag, looked at it and put it down on the mat. "Okay. Um. How about we let Uncle Nibbles do this one?"

Ethan sighed. "You've got to do it sometime, Cal."

Cal flung up his hands. "Okay! Fine! I'll do it!" He watched as Ethan helped Ariel to lie down. "Are you all right there, darling? Are you cold? Do you need more cushions?"

Ariel smiled at him. "I'm fine, Cal. Don't worry. Just focus on the babies. It really is better not to keep them waiting for this long. They must be so uncomfortable and it's probably not very good for them."

"Caleb, will you stop putting it off?" said Ethan.

Cal pouted, but as soon as he'd turned away from Ethan, a smile appeared on his face. He stripped Matilda of her nappy effortlessly, cleaned her up and put a new nappy on her. Once he'd done the same for Liam, he turned to Ethan, not trying to hide his smile now.

Ethan looked amazed. "Well done, Cal. I wasn't expecting… I shouldn't have doubted you."

"No, you shouldn't!" said Cal. "Who do you think was changing the nappies while you were sorting out the furniture? Ariel couldn't move because of the spinal block. It's true I got into a mess the first time and needed help, but apart from that, I was fine."

"Clearly," said Ethan. There was still surprise on his face, but admiration too.

Cal picked Liam up. "There: that's better, isn't it, Gerbil?"

"Gerbil?" echoed Ethan incredulously.

"He looks like a gerbil," said Cal. "And Matilda looks like a guinea pig."

Ethan shook his head. "You seriously need an eye test, Cal."

"I'm not the one who needs glasses!" said Cal. He planted several kisses on Liam's forehead. "There you are, mate! Do you want to go and have another cuddle with Mummy? Come on then." He kissed Liam and put him carefully into Ariel's arms. "I love you."

"I love you too," said Ariel.

Cal grinned. "I was actually talking to Liam, but now you mention it…" He kissed her softly. "I love you too."

* * *

Ethan stood in the kitchen, making no effort to start cooking. The girl he loved was happy with his brother. Completely happy.

And Ethan...

Ethan was rather surprised to find he felt happy too. At least, he was getting there.

Ariel and the babies had made such a difference in Cal. Ethan could hardly believe the change him. It had only been a couple of months ago that he'd cried in Ethan's arms over his feelings of worthlessness. Ariel had been alone and struggling with twins on the way. Now they were happy, in love, and the proudest parents in the world.

Ethan was happy for both of them - and perhaps in time, it would be his turn to find someone special.

He saw a movement and looked up to see Cal approaching, his expression concerned. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine," said Ethan, smiling. "I don't know how. But I'm fine."

Cal walked over and put his hands on Ethan's shoulders. "I'm sorry, Nibbles. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen."

"I know," said Ethan. "It's okay. I'm happy for you. For both of you."

Cal put his arms around him. "I couldn't have got through today without you."

Ethan smiled. "Well, I would like to be able to tell you you would have been fine without me, but…"

Cal laughed. "Fair enough."

"No, actually, it's not." Ethan let go of him and looked seriously at Cal. "Cal, I'm sorry for telling Mrs Beauchamp about the trip to London. I shouldn't have done that. I don't blame you for being angry with me. You have every right. I dealt with things badly and completely messed up. I really am sorry."

Cal hugged him again. "Don't worry about it, Nibbles. Mrs Beauchamp is terrifying and it's not like you've had an easy couple of months. When it comes to messing up, I'm still way ahead of you. I'm just sorry you have to put up with us all living with you."

"No, please stay as long as you like," said Ethan. "I know you'll want a family home eventually, but there's no hurry. Well, maybe there is a little bit of a hurry to find a storage facility because the clutter is making me feel rather stressed, but I'd like you and your family to stay for as long as you'd like to. I'd like to help. I'd like to be part of your lives."

"And you will be," said Cal, as he held Ethan more tightly. "You always will be."

* * *

Cal returned to the living room to discover Ariel singing softly to the twins. He got out his phone and took a picture of them. They'd have to get a proper family picture done later. But not just the four of them. Ethan too.

"Hey, beautiful," said Cal.

"Shh!" said Ariel, nodding towards the twins. Their eyes were closed. "They're almost asleep."

"Sorry," whispered Cal. He knelt beside the sofa. "Can I take one of them?"

"It might be best to wait till they're settled."

Cal leaned over to kiss her forehead. "I love you."

"I love you too," whispered Ariel. "Is Ethan okay?"

"Nibbles is fine," said Cal. "He says we can stay for as long as we like. I expect you'd like us to get our own place eventually, but maybe we could stay for a couple of months?"

Ariel smiled. "If Ethan really is okay with it, that would be lovely. But only if he is okay. I've hurt him enough."

"You haven't hurt anyone," said Cal. "Ethan really is fine. I think he does love you, but maybe he only ever saw you as a sort of sister. And that's kind of exactly what you are." He looked at her for a moment and smiled. "This is so weird."

Ariel smiled. "I know. I can't get used to it. But it's so… _right_ , isn't it?"

"Completely right," said Cal. "Though I actually mean it's weird that I love you so much more than I've ever loved any other woman; we've got two babies together… and yet you're almost the only girl in Holby I don't remember sleeping with."

"Caleb Knight, if my hands weren't occupied, I think I would at least pretend to hit you."

Cal smiled shamefacedly. "All I meant was I'm really looking forward to putting that right."

"I think you quite liked it last time," said Ariel.

"I'm sure I did," said Cal. He kissed Liam and Matilda. Immediately, they both woke up. They both looked up in his direction, their mouths half-open as though they couldn't decide whether to scream or not. "No. You're not going to scream. You don't need to scream. You're with Mummy and Daddy and everything's fine." He smiled. "But while you're awake, I wanted to run something by you. How would you like it if Mummy and Daddy got married?"

Ariel gasped. "Cal… I… I… oh my God… Cal, why can't you just get down on one knee and ask me properly like a normal... oh my God, what am I saying? Yes, Cal! Yes!"


End file.
